Judge orders adopted baby returned to bio Dad

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Judge orders adopted baby returned to bio Dad

Judge Orders Adopted Baby Returned to Soldier Dad - ABC News

What do you think? Should the baby stay with her adopted family, or be returned to her father?

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She should be returned to her father. The adoption agency knew within WEEKS of the birth that he did not consent to the adoption, if not before. That information should have been passed on to the adoptive parents, and if they still continued with the adoption knowing that the father was contesting it within weeks, it is their fault that they purposely kept the baby and grew attached.

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This article has more information. These adoptive parents knew from the beginning that he had not consented. Then it took over a year for a hearing? He not only deserves to get his child back he should be awarded damages if that were possible.

The adoption agency informed the Freis that the father did not know his daughter had been placed for adoption in Utah and it was likely he would contest the placement if he found out. The Freis, the judge noted in his ruling, "acknowledged this risk but decided they wanted to proceed forward with the adoptive placement anyway."

An attorney later contacted Achane, confirmed an adoption was in process and asked for his consent. Achane refused and told the attorney he wanted his daughter returned to him.

Instead, the Freis proceeded with the adoption. In their adoption petition, filed in July 2011, the couple acknowledged Achane was married to Bland when the child was conceived and born and that he had never consented to the adoption. They asked that his parental rights be terminated because he "abandoned the natural mother during her pregnancy" and "had not developed a substantial relationship" or otherwise taken responsibility for his daughter.

Achane intervened in the case and in October, more than a year later, a two-day hearing finally took place.

Father is ready to turn page on Utah adoption horror story | The Salt Lake Tribune

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He has a right to this child. I find it hard to believe that the agency couldn't find him as my understanding is with the military they can track down someone on base (I know we've had this discussion before on here at some point where we talked about garnishing wages for C.S.) fairly easily.

I think the adoption agency didn't care about his opinion. I think the adoptive parents knew he didn't know and figured it wouldn't matter which was a huge risk. I don't doubt that they are attached and love this child but they took that risk on.

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I was hoping this would be about Baby Emma Wyatt - same story, different father.

I've watched a few specials on this UT adoption scam and it makes me livid!

On one of the specials, it said the bio-dad has 20 days to file papers in UT. In the Emma Wyatt case, a text message from the bio-mom saying something like "I am exploring adoption" served as noticed thus starting the 20-day clock ticking. The baby was born in VA and the dad immediately filed for custody in the state of VA - which he was granted. Too late. The baby was placed with a UT couple and that was that. UT courts said too bad. He's been fighting since Feb. 2009!

Another bio-dad on the show had evidence he did file within the 20 days. The date-stamp on the paperwork was literally crossed out and another date after the deadline was written by hand. He still didn't have his child as of the time I saw the special.

In this case in the OP, this man was married to the mother. How does this happen? How can men be denied their parental rights so easily in a state? Well....pretty much because they value a traditional family unit over single parents and single dads.

He absolutely should have his child. I can't imagine if the reverse of this happened. Man kidnaps baby and turns him/her over for adoption and then having the mother have to fight for 4 years to try to get custody back.

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"GloriaInTX" wrote:

This article has more information. These adoptive parents knew from the beginning that he had not consented. Then it took over a year for a hearing? He not only deserves to get his child back he should be awarded damages if that were possible.

Father is ready to turn page on Utah adoption horror story | The Salt Lake Tribune

Wow! It just gets better and better doesn't it? The wife committed fraud and should be thrown in jail. This man is in the military. IIRC, they can get into serious s*** if they truly abandon their family. It would be really interesting to see all the records of emails, text messages, joint bank accounts.

Who has the nerve to go to the courts and have his parental rights terminated?

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On a lighter note, I am currently reading the 2nd article you posted Gloria and I had to chuckle when this man in the armed forces has the response to her being in Utah as "Where is Utah?" hahaha. Giggle of the day.

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I found their blog this morning after reading the article. The comments on some of the articles mentioned that they removed a bunch of false allegations about the father that they had written there. It is sick that they are asking for donations to keep appealing this case. The good thing is the donation amount is the same as it was this morning so it looks like no one is donating now, though I guess they must have previously. Hopefully those that donated didn't know all the details. I hope they are inundated with emails telling them to let this baby go home to her father.

Leah

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"Jessica80" wrote:

On a lighter note, I am currently reading the 2nd article you posted Gloria and I had to chuckle when this man in the armed forces has the response to her being in Utah as "Where is Utah?" hahaha. Giggle of the day.

Ya who would expect their wife to randomly take off from Texas and go to Utah to give birth? It is obvious she was deliberately trying to hide the baby from him. That is so wrong.

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haha that's not what I meant. I found it funny that he acted like he didn't know where Utah was Wink

Yeah I would never expect that he would know that. Wife was legitimately trying to hide it from him.

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"Jessica80" wrote:

On a lighter note, I am currently reading the 2nd article you posted Gloria and I had to chuckle when this man in the armed forces has the response to her being in Utah as "Where is Utah?" hahaha. Giggle of the day.

Hehe, me too.

I honestly am so so sad that this child was not returned the second that this was found out. Think of the trauma for this kid that wouldn't have happened as an infant. This poor man. And this awful woman. I think she should have criminal charges. As well as the adoption agency. Custodial interference or whatever.

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So am I the only one who thinks it would be traumatic on the part of the baby to remove it from the only home she has ever known? It is not her fault that there was a mix up with the adoption. Stories like this make me afraid to adopt.

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

So am I the only one who thinks it would be traumatic on the part of the baby to remove it from the only home she has ever known? It is not her fault that there was a mix up with the adoption. Stories like this make me afraid to adopt.

It will, but as a kid who lived through childhood trauma the sooner it happens the better. The adoptive parents, the agency and the biological mother are all blame for this travesty.

The easiest way to avoid something like this from happening is having consent from both parents.

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

So am I the only one who thinks it would be traumatic on the part of the baby to remove it from the only home she has ever known? It is not her fault that there was a mix up with the adoption. Stories like this make me afraid to adopt.

This child was kidnapped. Should Steven Stayner and Sean Hollenback have stayed with their kidnapper because it would be traumatic to go home?

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

So am I the only one who thinks it would be traumatic on the part of the baby to remove it from the only home she has ever known? It is not her fault that there was a mix up with the adoption. Stories like this make me afraid to adopt.

She is young enough that she will get over it quickly as long as her daddy gives her lots of love which I am sure he will do since he is fighting so hard to get her.

Besides these people brought this on themselves, since they went ahead with the adoption knowing that her father didn't consent. I don't think you would be stupid enough to do that.

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Oh I never said it wouldn't be traumatic. Just like any kid who is removed from a home they know. As I said, I have no doubt this family was awesome and loving but it's just not the right thing.

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I missed it, but wasn't the adoption already final before the adoptive parents knew? I thought the article said 3 weeks after the adoption?

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I missed it, but wasn't the adoption already final before the adoptive parents knew? I thought the article said 3 weeks after the adoption?

No they knew from the very beginning.

Teleah was born March 1, 2011, more than two weeks premature, at Mountain View Hospital in Payson.
Two days later, Bland relinquished her parental rights and the infant was placed with the Freis. At the time, Bland claimed her husband had abandoned her and was not interested in raising the child, according to the ruling.

Bland told the Adoption Center of Choice it could reach her husband in Texas, though she knew he was in South Carolina and thus would not receive any legal notices sent to his former address. Bland also apparently withheld Achane’s telephone number from the agency and later claimed she did not contact him about the birth because her phone wasn’t working.

The adoption agency informed the Freis that the father did not know his daughter had been placed for adoption in Utah and it was likely he would contest the placement if he found out. The Freis, the judge noted in his ruling, "acknowledged this risk but decided they wanted to proceed forward with the adoptive placement anyway."

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

So am I the only one who thinks it would be traumatic on the part of the baby to remove it from the only home she has ever known? It is not her fault that there was a mix up with the adoption. Stories like this make me afraid to adopt.

I do think this too, and my heart goes out to her as well as the father. I think they are both victims here, and it makes my heart ache to think of taking a baby away from loving parents in the only home she has ever known. I think that people tend to assume that because a very small child can't articulate their feelings, they don't feel things as strongly as we might. I think being taken away from her family (so far as she knows) will be as devastating for her as it would be for an older child who is able to say so. Heartbreaking.

Having said that, I think that in this case, she should be returned to her father. It wasn't his fault, and I don't think that we can ignore his parental rights. I hope that they are able to put together a loving and stable family once they are reunited, and move forward together.

Honestly, I actually feel bad for everyone in this case, including the adoptive parents. I don't think that they were trying to steal anyone's kid; they went through an adoption agency and did they everything that they were supposed to do, even if the mother and adoption agency did not. I know that they ignored the fact that he didn't consent, and that is therefore the risk they took, but I still feel sad for them. I can't imagine raising a child for two years, only to have to give her back. I think they are legally in the wrong, but I still feel sympathy for the pain they will have to go through.

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Shame on the bio-mother, shame on the Freis, and shame on the state of Utah. They should all be charged with fraud, kidnapping, obstruction of justice, and the dad & daughter should get pain & suffering damages, as well.

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"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

Honestly, I actually feel bad for everyone in this case, including the adoptive parents. I don't think that they were trying to steal anyone's kid; they went through an adoption agency and did they everything that they were supposed to do, even if the mother and adoption agency did not. I know that they ignored the fact that he didn't consent, and that is therefore the risk they took, but I still feel sad for them. I can't imagine raising a child for two years, only to have to give her back. I think they are legally in the wrong, but I still feel sympathy for the pain they will have to go through.

I don't feel sorry for them at all. This child was NOT available for adoption and they KNEW it. They took her anyway, took her away from her father. Seriously, I think some of the other states involved in these cases should sue Utah for continuing to allow this. If the father hasn't consented, then the child isn't available, end of story. Even if you don't think the father would consent to adoption, the answer isn't to hide the baby.

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"Spacers" wrote:

I don't feel sorry for them at all. This child was NOT available for adoption and they KNEW it. They took her anyway, took her away from her father. Seriously, I think some of the other states involved in these cases should sue Utah for continuing to allow this. If the father hasn't consented, then the child isn't available, end of story. Even if you don't think the father would consent to adoption, the answer isn't to hide the baby.

I don't think it's as cut and dried as that. I blame the adoption agency for ignoring the laws and procedures that they should be very well aware of more so than the adoptive parents. The article said the adoptive mom was telling the adoption agency that the dad had just abandoned her and was not interested in raising the child, which was probably communicated to the adoptive parents. At the time when they adopted, they didn't know that he wanted the child back, they just knew that he hadn't yet consented to the adoption. They probably figured he was just another dead beat dad that didn't care about his responsibilities. Later, they found out that he wanted his daughter back, and they should have given her back, but I can also see how someone would rationalize to themselves "We have been raising her all of this time, he just now shows up, that's not fair to her, et cetera."

Look, I think they are wrong, and they need to give her back. All I'm saying is, I feel some sympathy for them.

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I have a question for the military people on here. I was under the impression (based on my experience) that it is impossible to "hide" in the military. If this woman truly felt he abandoned her, couldn't she make a phone call to get the ball rolling? Or go to the base with her dependent ID and tell someone? It just doesn't seem logical that he could get away with abandoning her.

I was also under the impression that if a member of the military is involved in a court hearing, there are extra steps they had to take. I can't figure out how they would be able to show a long enough paper trial that they attempted to locate him. With today's technology, wouldn't there be facebook, email, cell phones, joint bank accounts, etc.?

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There are just too many of these cases. I would never give up the fight for my child if someone kidnapped her.

In 2009 David Goldman was reunited with his then-9YO son after fighting for 5 years.

This does not have to be as difficult as they are making it. "Too much time has passed" is not a valid argument. There is no statute of limitations for kidnapping in UT. And in reality, they could minimize the time by following the court order.

I would love for the military or federal government to get involved to see if they violated in other laws.

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This was 23 years ago but my niece's bio-dad was in the Air Force. He'd wanted my sister to get an abortion but she didn't. She told him if he didn't want to be a father, that was fine with her but she wanted him to see his daughter before making his decision. He started avoided her, disconnected his phone, even came to her house & peeled off the sticker off her car so she couldn't get on base, quit his off-base second job and stopped hanging out at his usual bar. After the baby was born, my sister called his Commanding Officer, who said bring the baby here on Friday, and the CO had him sitting there in his office.

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"Spacers" wrote:

I don't feel sorry for them at all. This child was NOT available for adoption and they KNEW it. They took her anyway, took her away from her father. Seriously, I think some of the other states involved in these cases should sue Utah for continuing to allow this. If the father hasn't consented, then the child isn't available, end of story. Even if you don't think the father would consent to adoption, the answer isn't to hide the baby.

I know someone right now who has a child (just a few weeks old) placed for adoption in their home and they were just informed that the father, who is in prison, will not consent to the adoption and they will have to wait a few months and then have a hearing. Are they to just give the child back? Of course it is different that the father of this child is in prison and OBVIOUSLY can't raise a child right now, but they have no idea if he is contesting because he actually wants the child, or because he is just trying to be beligerant or get back at the mother. The Freis may not have known either. Without having ALL the facts (which of course we don't) we can't know if they knew that the father actually wanted the child when he refused to consent to the adoption. I agree with everything Alissa has said. The child should absolutely be returned, but I do feel sympathy for the adoptive family and I don't see them as kidnappers.

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"SID081108" wrote:

I know someone right now who has a child (just a few weeks old) placed for adoption in their home and they were just informed that the father, who is in prison, will not consent to the adoption and they will have to wait a few months and then have a hearing. Are they to just give the child back? Of course it is different that the father of this child is in prison and OBVIOUSLY can't raise a child right now, but they have no idea if he is contesting because he actually wants the child, or because he is just trying to be beligerant or get back at the mother. The Freis may not have known either. Without having ALL the facts (which of course we don't) we can't know if they knew that the father actually wanted the child when he refused to consent to the adoption. I agree with everything Alissa has said. The child should absolutely be returned, but I do feel sympathy for the adoptive family and I don't see them as kidnappers.

This man and others who are in similar situations have spent years and large sums of money fighting for their children. This is a huge committment financially and emotionally. This is something that will impact the rest of their lives. I don't believe anyone would go to that length to keep a baby that they didn't really want. Clearly others will go to great lengths to deny these men their rights as evidenced by all of these UT cases. Even if it means breaking the law.

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I'm sorry your friends are dealing with this, but there's an easy solution. Adoption agencies shouldn't be placing children for adoption that they don't have absolute authority to place. If both parents haven't signed off on it, then the child shouldn't be considered adoptable.

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I fully agree that now it is obvious that the man wants the child. I'm saying initially, when they proceeded with the adoption, they may not have known what his intentions were in refusing to sign the papers. Now they are likely attached to the child and acting selfishly out of that attachment. Their judgment is clearly clouded by the fact that THEY want to keep the child, rather than stepping back and viewing what is best for the little girl (they've no doubt convinced themselves that it's best that the baby stay with them).

What documentary did you watch? I would be interested in seeing it.

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"ethanwinfield" wrote:

This man and others who are in similar situations have spent years and large sums of money fighting for their children. This is a huge committment financially and emotionally. This is something that will impact the rest of their lives. I don't believe anyone would go to that length to keep a baby that they didn't really want. Clearly others will go to great lengths to deny these men their rights as evidenced by all of these UT cases. Even if it means breaking the law.

It is clear now that he wants to keep the child, but doubtful that was clear when they took that baby home. I do not believe the adoptive family are kidnappers. I believe they are victims that will be in pain for a long time. It is the adoption agency's fault for adopting out a baby without both parents having signed off.

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They knew for SURE by the time the baby was 3 months old that he was contesting the adoption and they just ignored it. If their lawyers didn't tell them that they had no chance of winning when the father and mother were married when the baby was born they were neglectful. I'm sure that they did love her but the transition would have been much easier at 3 months than 2 years old. I think that was very selfish on their part to continue holding on to her at the point that they knew the father wanted her.

In June 2011, Bland for the first time informed her husband she had given birth in Utah and placed the child through the Adoption Center of Choice.

"I was like, ‘Utah? Where is Utah?’ I’d never been to Utah, she’s never been to Utah," he said. "Adoption? Who does that? ... I believe she felt guilty at that point because she just made a call out of the blue," said Achane.

That same day, Achane contacted the adoption agency and requested information about his child, which the agency refused to give him.
An attorney later contacted Achane, confirmed an adoption was in process and asked for his consent. Achane refused and told the attorney he wanted his daughter returned to him.

Instead, the Freis proceeded with the adoption. In their adoption petition, filed in July 2011, the couple acknowledged Achane was married to Bland when the child was conceived and born and that he had never consented to the adoption. They asked that his parental rights be terminated because he "abandoned the natural mother during her pregnancy" and "had not developed a substantial relationship" or otherwise taken responsibility for his daughter.

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I agree that they should have given her back at that time, however heart wrenching it would have been then.

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"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

It is clear now that he wants to keep the child, but doubtful that was clear when they took that baby home. I do not believe the adoptive family are kidnappers. I believe they are victims that will be in pain for a long time. It is the adoption agency's fault for adopting out a baby without both parents having signed off.

It is absolutely clear that this man wanted this child. Mom got pregnant in June, dad was in Texas with her attending prenatal appointments until January when he had to move under military orders. Mom wanted to stay with family in Texas until baby was born. Dad was approved for a 10-day leave to return to Texas when the baby was born, expecting to bring his wife & baby back to South Carolina with him. Contrary to the mom's claim of abandonment, he continued paying her bills while he was gone! In mid-March, unable to reach his wife, he asks friends in Texas to check on her and finds out that she's no longer pregnant but no one knows where the baby is. In June, wife tells him that the baby was adopted in Utah. The very same day, within two months of the baby's birth, he calls the adoption agency and demands information about his baby, which the agency refused to give him. This family knew 18 months ago that the biological father was making a claim for her, and they have drawn this case out, refusing to give his daughter to him, since then. That *is* kidnapping IMHO.

Father is ready to turn page on Utah adoption horror story | The Salt Lake Tribune

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I do think that something really needs to be done about the time it takes these cases to get through the courts and red tape. IMO it is ridiculous that it took over a year in this case even for a hearing! When children are involved a year can make a big difference. My sister just finalized the adoption of her own granddaughter and even though they told them they wanted her within a week of her birth, since she was put into foster care first it took 10 months before they could even get her out of foster care and take her home. And this was even though the mother's rights were terminated at birth and the father, her son consented to the adoption. (The mother has mental problems and already had other children removed so the state took custody at birth and wouldn't let her son have custody because they were still living together.)

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"Spacers" wrote:

It is absolutely clear that this man wanted this child. Mom got pregnant in June, dad was in Texas with her attending prenatal appointments until January when he had to move under military orders. Mom wanted to stay with family in Texas until baby was born. Dad was approved for a 10-day leave to return to Texas when the baby was born, expecting to bring his wife & baby back to South Carolina with him. Contrary to the mom's claim of abandonment, he continued paying her bills while he was gone! In mid-March, unable to reach his wife, he asks friends in Texas to check on her and finds out that she's no longer pregnant but no one knows where the baby is. In June, wife tells him that the baby was adopted in Utah. The very same day, within two months of the baby's birth, he calls the adoption agency and demands information about his baby, which the agency refused to give him. This family knew 18 months ago that the biological father was making a claim for her, and they have drawn this case out, refusing to give his daughter to him, since then. That *is* kidnapping IMHO.

Father is ready to turn page on Utah adoption horror story | The Salt Lake Tribune

Do you honestly believe that the adoptive parents had all of this information when the baby was placed with them?? We have no way of knowing for sure, but I doubt it. I'm honestly in no way trying to call them blameless, but I think calling them kidnappers is a bit harsh. I place much more blame on the adoption agency (and of course the birth mother), who would have had much more access to the facts.

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"SID081108" wrote:

Do you honestly believe that the adoptive parents had all of this information when the baby was placed with them?? We have no way of knowing for sure, but I doubt it. I'm honestly in no way trying to call them blameless, but I think calling them kidnappers is a bit harsh. I place much more blame on the adoption agency (and of course the birth mother), who would have had much more access to the facts.

Yes, I do honestly believe that. The court case shows that the adoption agency told them at the beginning that not only was the father unaware of the birth, he was likely to not consent. They just hoped that, being in Utah, they could get the baby legally adopted before he found out and that, even if he did find out, the courts of Utah seem to be rallied pretty well against bio-dads so they figured it was a done deal as long as the mom consented. There are literally dozens of bio-dads right now trying to fight adoptions just like this one. And when they found out at 3 months that he wanted his baby, and they didn't hand her over, they became kidnappers. I'm not saying the bio-mom or agency aren't to blame, they absolutely are, but the adoptive parents are the ones who could have stopped this either at the beginning or at 3 months.

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My husband and I watched the news story about this on CNN this weekend where the bio dad was interviewed. My husband said the same thing, even with regard to the friend of mine who currently has a baby placed. He said the moment it is clear that both parents have not consented, the baby should not be considered adoptable. I'm not sure I see it as that clear cut, given the facts in my friend's case, but I really did feel for this bio dad after I saw this interview. And the bio mom was interviewed, too, and she cried and said "I would rather have my baby struggling with me then see her with him" I wonder why she hates him so much?? Sad story.