I agree. I don't think admonishing in front of friends is that terrible just not something I would do as I see harm in it. What this "mother" is doing is despicable.
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Abuse? Aside from the belt I think it may be hard to prove abuse in this situation. I disagree with this punishment, it doesnt seem to fit with the bad grade. I wonder how the mom came up with that?
I'm a firm believer in logical consequences. What was the point of shaving her head, except to embarass & humiliate her? If she didn't do well in school, I'd have followed her every single day to class to make sure she went, and she would have absolutely nothing to do at home except chores & homework, no computer time, no phone, no friends over. If she played a sport, I'd withdraw her from the team. Running around in a diaper? There's no point to that except to embarass & humiliate her, and that's not acceptable. That is not an acceptable part of "parenting."
This was just disgusting.
When my kids get older, I want them to look back and think, 'well i did something bad and deserved a punishment, and what my mom did sucked at the time, but helped me grow as a person'. Punishments should be like CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, whatever it is, it should help you do better the next time around, and make you grow. There is no way this will not leave this girl with emotional scars. And mother-daughter bonds have got to be damaged beyond repair. That's sad.
I really agree that punishing with food is a parenting fail. Eating Pb&J because that's what you can afford is different than punishing with food. I'm pretty sure no one suggested that it was child abuse to not be able to buy more than that.
One thing I wonder. If this was the third time it happened...maybe the kid isn't even capable of doing better at what she's failing? Why isnt the mom helping her get help with her grades and studying?
I would not be on board with blanketly calling humiliation abuse and a reason to take children away from their parents. While it is a discipline method that I don't agree with and truly hate.....i don't think that means every child in every situation who suffers some sort of humliation at the mercy of their parents would be better off in a foster home.
However this is extreme, so i'd like to see some accountability in the situation.
But you know...those people who make their kids stand outside with a sign or other sorts of atrocious things? I am not interested in either the time, resources, or outcomes of taking these kids away and punishing their parents.
We have to find a point where we can disagree and leave it at that. While we all wish every kid could grow up in our own personal view of the perfect environment...its not going to happen. Save the legal stuff for the cases that really matter. But i do think that the one in the article fits, especially since its chronic.
I just read the article, and these people are abusers.
How is this not abuse?Quote:
Besides diaper duty, the couple punished some of the children by letting them eat only peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a month and not allowing them to take showers.
Putting a diaper on your 12-year-old and shaving her head is also abuse. It's also going to lead to some serious issues for that child throughout her life, as she deals with others, becomes a parent, etc. There is no doubt in my mind that these people should have their children taken away. While there are many forms of discipline and strictness that I may not agree with, I can see how they're not abusive, but this absolutely crosses the line, and yes, you DO have to draw a line, and here it is. I'm sickened by this.