No Candy For You

33 posts / 0 new
Last post
Joined: 08/17/04
Posts: 2226
No Candy For You
ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

Bad, bad, bad idea. I sort of laughed at some of the people commenting in the story, saying they thought it was 'inappropriate'. Inappropriate???? How about waaaayyyyyyyy nasty and self-righteous. Man, is she in for a pumpkin-smashing, toilet-paper wrapping bring down on her house some time after Halloween.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

No one is obligated to pass out candy on Halloween. If you go door to door asking for something, in my opinion you need to take or not take whatever you are willing to give them. I know many people pass out religious literature along with their candy. If people do not like that, then they will not go to that house or throw the papers away.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

No one is obligated to pass out candy on Halloween. If you go door to door asking for something, in my opinion you need to take or not take whatever you are willing to give them. I know many people pass out religious literature along with their candy. If people do not like that, then they will not go to that house or throw the papers away.

Seriously? You don't see anything wrong with someone who happily gives out candy to the skinny kids but gives a note to the overweight kids saying "You're fat. No candy for you."????? We're not talking about religious literature here. Good grief.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

I am saying it is an entitlement attitude to think that someone has to give your child anything. The person might be a jerk, but they do not have to give anything at all to anyone.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I am saying it is an entitlement attitude to think that someone has to give your child anything. The person might be a jerk, but they do not have to give anything at all to anyone.

Um, see I don't think my kids or any kid has a sense of entitlement when they walk up to a lit house with a pumpkin out front or whatever on October 31st. It's Halloween for crying out loud. The people that don't want to give out candy typically turn out the lights or leave for the evening. So, even if a kid does have a sense of "entitlement" (and the use of that word I disagree with in the context of this debate) for candy, then so freaking what? I sure as heck expected to get candy when I went trick or treating. Isn't that the whole point of it? You ring the bell, the door opens, you yell "Trick or Treat", you get candy.

Anyway, this has nothing to do with entitlement or whatever. It has to do with an idiot woman who feels she has the right to fat shame kids on Halloween, of all nights.

Joined: 08/17/04
Posts: 2226

Then don't give out anything! But to pick and choose what kids get to have candy based on your standards and NO knowledge of that child's health or anything is pretty sick to me.

It's not like I'm mad that she's giving out only almond joy's and I hate almond joys.

GloriaInTX's picture
Joined: 07/29/08
Posts: 4116

Ya I think nothing is better than giving certain kids a nasty letter. Way to make Halloween fun for everyone. A Halloween Grinch if there ever was one.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3312

Well sure no one is obligated to hand out candy. That doesn't mean anything you decided to do otherwise is a nice or good thing to do.

I mean if she passed out notes that said "I hate you" would we be saying thats okay because no one is obligated to hand out candy?

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

I do not see anywhere in the OP where it says that some kids are getting candy and some are not.

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

What a *****! If you dont want to give out candy then dont, but no kid deserves to be bullied, on halloween, by an adult. This is a great post about some fun, noncandy things you can give out. Her focus is on health, not weight, but she wont give out things she wouldnt feed her kids, which is fair, but she isnt a douche about it. The Only Halloween Candy I'll Buy (Plus Other Alternatives) - 100 Days of Real Food

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I do not see anywhere in the OP where it says that some kids are getting candy and some are not.

What do you think, the skinny kids get a letter that says, 'good for you, your not fat!"

It doesnt matter what the other kids get, only the overweight kids get this letter, so it is made to shame them specifically which makes this woman a horrible horrible person.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

I am not saying that it was a nice or kind thing to do or that her letter was nicely written. I have seen other articles about people giving out tooth brushes and tooth paste instead of candy. It is not a nice thing to do, but she does not HAVE to give candy to anyone.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

"ftmom" wrote:

What do you think, the skinny kids get a letter that says, 'good for you, your not fat!"

It doesnt matter what the other kids get, only the overweight kids get this letter, so it is made to shame them specifically which makes this woman a horrible horrible person.

It came across to me that she was not giving candy to anyone. I could be wrong.

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I am not saying that it was a nice or kind thing to do or that her letter was nicely written. I have seen other articles about people giving out tooth brushes and tooth paste instead of candy. It is not a nice thing to do, but she does not HAVE to give candy to anyone.

Tooth paste and tooth brushes would be awesome! I would even be more accepting of a letter telling my child how halloween is a pagan ritual....blah, blah, blah. I would simply explain to my child that different people believe different things etc. But with this letter, how do you explain to your child that his friend didnt get this letter cause he isnt fat, and what about kids who already feel bad about their weight? My sister is working really hard to keep her daughter from an eating disorder (they caught the throwing up early and are working with councilors etc) but I couldnt imagine what would happen if she got one of these letters.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I am not saying that it was a nice or kind thing to do or that her letter was nicely written. I have seen other articles about people giving out tooth brushes and tooth paste instead of candy. It is not a nice thing to do, but she does not HAVE to give candy to anyone.

Nobody is disputing that, and it's not the point of the debate.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3312

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I do not see anywhere in the OP where it says that some kids are getting candy and some are not.

The article says she is going to give overweight kids the letter. That sounds pretty selective to me! And the letter is not generic...it says "Your child, in my opinion, is moderately obese"

Even one of the neighbors says

"Here, you get candy. You get a letter. Like that kid hasn't suffered enough?" said one neighbor.

Also the question was not "Are people obligated to give candy" Jessica's question was "Is this a good idea, bad idea or does she need to mind her own business"

GloriaInTX's picture
Joined: 07/29/08
Posts: 4116

I would be very surprised if this woman doesn't wake up on Nov. 1st with her house egged and toilet papered. In this case I can't say I would blame anyone for doing it.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

"Jessica80" wrote:

Good idea? Bad idea? Needs to mind her own business?

To go back to the original question, I will say it is a bad idea and mean, but her right to pass out what ever she wants to someone coming to her house.

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

Ugh. That is truly awful. If you don't want to hand out candy, don't hand out candy, but that doesn't make it then okay to hand out nasty letters instead. I can't believe anyone thinks that is okay!!!

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6561

Let me give a different example. If someone where to put a large bright sign in their yard saying there is not Santa Claws that would be very mean spirited but that home owner still has that right to do whatever they want to to their own home.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3312

Yeah but no one was saying she didn't have the right. That really is not in question. No one is requesting her arrest for doing something illegal.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

Let me give a different example. If someone where to put a large bright sign in their yard saying there is not Santa Claws that would be very mean spirited but that home owner still has that right to do whatever they want to to their own home.

Three things: First, there is no Santa Claws. Second, home owners can't do whatever they want to their home. Third, the example you give doesn't have anything to do with the debate.

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

Yeah, I'm with Kim, I don't think she should be arrested for it. She has a legal right to do it, but it's still a really nasty thing to do. I also don't see how it's "entitled" of kids to think that they are getting something other than a nasty letter on Halloween. If you don't want to give out anything on Halloween, the universal sign for that is to just shut off your porch light. Everyone knows that, and will leave you alone. I'm certainly not arguing that she should be forced to give out candy. I also think it would be acceptable to give out pretty much anything that was well meaning if she wanted to participate but did not want to give out candy. Toothbrushes, spider rings, pencils, even religious tracts would all be acceptable, because presumably they are all given with good intentions in the spirit of the holiday. However, to turn your porch light on to lure kids in, only to give them a mean letter? That's not acceptable behavior. It's not illegal, but it's still not acceptable.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3312

And really, the note talks about "it takes a village"....i wonder how much else she's done to help these kids out besides writing them a mean letter on a fun holiday.

mommytoMR.FACE's picture
Joined: 04/10/09
Posts: 781

How does she know these children don't have Cushing's syndrome or a rare kidney disorder like the cuppycake song boy? She doesn't. Shame on her for being a stuck up sanctimonious b****. Looks like she failed herself, as she lacks compassion and intelligence.

mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

This is so wrong and if she lived here I wonder how she would tell the obese kids from the thin kids, most years snowsuits are on or at least a heavy coat. Robbie will be wearing long underwear, sweat pants and a hoody under his costume. He is going to look obese but he is underweight, his costume includes a face mask (spiderman) and so it is not like she would recognize him.

There are many things she could give out that is not candy or even food related.

Joined: 03/08/03
Posts: 3189

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

To go back to the original question, I will say it is a bad idea and mean, but her right to pass out what ever she wants to someone coming to her house.

Bonita, it's HALLOWEEN. Kids go trick-or-treating on Halloween asking for candy, it's a normal once-a-year tradition and it's not like this woman is being harassed or invaded. People who don't want trick-or-treaters simply don't decorate their houses or windows and either go out or keep any room visible to the street dark. Or they just don't answer the door! Or they put a sign up that says "sorry not celebrating Halloween".

Giving a nasty note out to obese kids is just mean and completely uncalled for. "It takes a village" doesn't mean it's open season on criticizing other people's kids. If she really felt that way she'd give out nutritious treats instead, or toothbrushes, or recipe cards with alternative ingredients, or set up a nutritional educational program in the neighborhood, not insult kids she deems obese. She's a self-righteous nutjob, in my opinion, with a mean streak too.

MissyJ's picture
Joined: 01/31/02
Posts: 3218

Wow. Ok - so she may have a "right" to give out these letters to those kids that she deems as obese. I hope that the parents that decide to stand at the end of her sidewalk with signs sharing what they think of her choice of actions are granted that same *right*.

Halloween Grinch indeed.

~Missy

mom3girls's picture
Joined: 01/09/07
Posts: 1535

We have a good friend that is a dentist, he gives out toothbrushes. It is always fun for the kids to go there.

This woman will do NOTHING to help kids that are overweight. She is being mean spirited nothing else.

I also think this is horrible because how can a person look at a child and know what their health status is? I have seen some kids that looked overweight and within a short time are a lot taller and thin again. 2 of my 4 kids look a little chubby before they grow, and I would be livid if someone told them or me they were fat

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

"mom2robbie" wrote:

This is so wrong and if she lived here I wonder how she would tell the obese kids from the thin kids, most years snowsuits are on or at least a heavy coat. Robbie will be wearing long underwear, sweat pants and a hoody under his costume. He is going to look obese but he is underweight, his costume includes a face mask (spiderman) and so it is not like she would recognize him.

There are many things she could give out that is not candy or even food related.

lol! I thought the same thing. How can you tell when there is multiple layers and snowsuits under the costume. Every kid looks like the michalin man Smile

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4100

"ClairesMommy" wrote:

Bad, bad, bad idea. I sort of laughed at some of the people commenting in the story, saying they thought it was 'inappropriate'. Inappropriate???? How about waaaayyyyyyyy nasty and self-righteous. Man, is she in for a pumpkin-smashing, toilet-paper wrapping bring down on her house some time after Halloween.

OMG, I totally agree with this! I'd probably even help with it. :oops:

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

No one is obligated to pass out candy on Halloween. If you go door to door asking for something, in my opinion you need to take or not take whatever you are willing to give them. I know many people pass out religious literature along with their candy. If people do not like that, then they will not go to that house or throw the papers away.

If you don't want to pass out candy, then you turn off your front light and everyone knows to not go there. You don't answer the door and then give the ones that you deem overweight a nasty letter. And I'm sure we could probably find something in her lifestyle or eating habits that would warrant a nasty letter from someone else who so desired, kwim? Maybe she's thin but does she smoke, eat Cheetos too often, drink diet soda, not exercise, live on lettuce, drive everywhere, and so on?

Joined: 04/12/03
Posts: 1686

How hurtful Sad

I would rather have my children off-the-chart obese and have a kind heart than have the "perfect" body and a mean heart.

Those who give stuff out on Halloween are under no obligation to do so. My children have received prayer books, doughnut coupons, stickers, temporary tattoos, pencils, toothbrushes, ear plugs and candy. I love Halloween and anything that would take away from the enjoyment for little kids is just wrong.