What do you all think of pacis? Lazy parenting? Not a problem with them?
Me - Kristi, 29
DD - Leia, July 5 2008
I luurrrrrve to lurk!
I have mixed feelings about pacis. I wasn't planning on giving my son one, but the nurses in the hospital gave him one because he just literally wanted to suck all of the time. I experienced this at home too - if I didn't give him his bink he wanted me to be his bink (lots and lots of non-nutritive nursing aside from our actual nursing sessions, which were very successful) so I eventually broke down and just gave him a bink. Honestly, I think it was a major sanity saver. Having a very colicky newborn is so intense anyway, I think that it would have been a lot harder if I had let him "nurse" (or let him cry) instead of giving him his bink.
I definitely don't blame anyone who makes that same decision.
Having said that, I do wish I had wrestled it away from him a bit sooner than I did. Maybe. He took his bink (for naps and sleeping only) until he was almost 3. I felt really bad when the dentist could tell immediately that he took a pacifier just by glancing at his teeth (even though she assured me that it would be fine assuming he wasn't still using it by the time he was getting his adult teeth in.) Then again, when he gave it up voluntarily at almost 3, there was a minimum of drama and he seemed really proud of himself (and I was super proud of him) so maybe it wasn't the worst thing in the world that I let him do it on more of his own schedule (with some gentle prodding.)
Either way, I think this is one of those Seems-More-Important-Than-It-Really-Is parenting decisions that we all get hit with. Bink or no bink, I don't think it really matters too much after the fact. KWIM?
-Alissa, mom to Tristan (5) and Reid (the baby!)
Got an opinion? We've got a board! Come join us for some lively debate on the Face Off! Debate Arena board.
I have no problem with pacifiers.
DS didn't get a pacifier until he was 2 weeks old and we had already established a good nursing relationship.
His pacifier is a good way to sooth him without having to nurse nurse nurse all. the. time.
I nurse on demand and if ever he was ever rooting around I would nurse, but if he was just fussy and needed something to help him sleep, I had no problem offering a soother.
I've had 1 with paci, she's now 13, gave up paci around 2. I have a 3 year old that doesn't take paci, never has. I now have a 10 month old that is head over heels for her paci. It's mox nix to me.
I think pacifiers are great and all 4 of my babies used them. But I do think they need to be weaned off them by about a year old, before they are old enough to ask for it. When I decided it was time to take it away I just threw them all out so they would never see it and I never had a problem.
Mom to Lee, Jake, Brandon, Rocco
Stepmom to Ryan, Regan, Braden, Baley
Granddaughters Kylie 10/18/2010 & Aleya 4/22/2013
I never consider a difference of opinion in politics, in religion, in philosopy, as a cause for withdrawing from a friend. --Thomas Jefferson
I have no issue with them. I'm not a fan of an older toddler/child with one but that's something I can only control with my own, if somebody else lets theirs have it, that's their business.
Both mine had soothers from the beginning. DD was a preemie, born 9 weeks early, and it was given to her to learn how to suck. Sometimes they just wanted to suck for comfort and weren't hungry... so it was nice to have that option to help soothe them.
For the most part though, with both my children, the soothers were really only used a bed/naptimes and taken with us when we went out in case they were needed (ie church, restaurant, etc) when they were quite young... after about 1 year they really stayed home though and ONLY used in the crib. They never used them 24/7. My goal was always to have them off them by 2 years of age... I took dd's away when she was about 20 months or so with no issues. DS was 15 months but that was only because we lost both of his and I wasn't running out to buy a new one... he did fine for bed/naps so when we did find one the next night I just didn't give it back (mean mommy LOL)
They aren't for us. None of my three were ever offered one. I was uncomfortable with the idea of them sucking on plastic so much (I'm weird about plastic) and I was terrified of a baby waking all night because their paci had fallen out and they could not replace it yet. Also dis not want to deal w paci weaning as I had heard horror stories - I admit to
Finding it really annoying when older children use them and try to talk around them and you can't understand them.
I could care less if other parents use them - and I know that if I had a colicky baby I would have tried it (or anything!) to help baby/me.
I don't mind pacis for babies or even as a sleep aid for toddlers one bit. However, I do hate seeing kids walking around with one in their mouth all the time and that, IMHO, is lazy parenting. From a getting-rid-of-them point of view, they are easier to break the habit than a baby's thumbsucking, so that's why I tried to introduce one when neither of my babies sucked their thumbs but seemed to *need* constant sucking comfort. My babies didn't take them, they would suck on one of DH's fingers for comfort, or nurse on demand if I was home. Had my kids used a paci, it would have designated as an in-bed item as soon as they started walking.
ETA: when Tiven was in ICN I specified no pacis because I wanted to make sure that our nursing relationship got off to a good start and didn't want any unnecessary interference. It was hard enough with the challenges we faced, and I think having something else to suck on might have really made a difference in the wrong way.
Last edited by Spacers; 07-27-2011 at 01:06 PM.
It takes 12 pounds of grain and 2500 gallons of water to produce ONE POUND of beef.
Livestock generates 65% of all human-related nitrous oxide, which is 296 times more warming to the environment than carbon dioxide; 37% of all human-related methane, which 23 times as warming as CO2; and 64 percent of ammonia, which contributes significantly to acid rain.
"If you care about the planet, it's actually better to eat a salad in a Hummer than a cheeseburger in a Prius."
-- Bill Maher
I had no problems breaking DD1 from the paci. I threw it out one day, told her I was doing it, she cried a little bit and that was the end. I didn't make it a big dramatic production or stress myself out over it. Several of my friends have tried the same thing and it's worked beautifully. Of course, if they hold onto it for way too long, I'm sure it's way more involved.