Pre-nup social media clauses
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Thread: Pre-nup social media clauses

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    Online Community Director MissyJ's Avatar
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    Default Pre-nup social media clauses

    Couples Beginning To Include Social Media Clauses In Prenuptial Agreements

    Would you recommend this for a friend / family member about to marry?

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    Quote Originally Posted by MissyJ View Post
    Couples Beginning To Include Social Media Clauses In Prenuptial Agreements

    Would you recommend this for a friend / family member about to marry?
    I would recommend never letting a picture or video be taken of yourself that you truly would not want put out there. For example, don't make a sex tape or take nude pictures if you do not want anyone to ever get them. In my humble opinion, that would be a better option than this kind of prenupt.

    ~Bonita~

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    Posting Addict KimPossible's Avatar
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    I don't know. We didn't do a Pre-nup but i could see how this might be a good thing to include if you were going to do one.

    I truly and totally trust my husband and so thats how I treat our relationship, and so i don't sit there worrying about what he could do with pictures of me or whatnot if we were to get divorced. I don't foresee a divorce in my future and even if we did divorce, i don't foresee him acting like a jerk about it.

    Could I be wrong? Sure I could be wrong. But you know...i'll deal with that if I have to, its the chance I take putting faith(faith with good reason) into my relationship. Fortunately its not something I worry about regularly.

    Anyway, thats the way I went into the marriage, so we didn't do a pre-nup. But yeah....if one is going to draw up a contract for the possible day a relationship could get nasty, then it would make sense to include social media, because i think social media is an easy way to get very nasty and cause a lot of damage to someones character and/or quality of life.

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    Online Community Director MissyJ's Avatar
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    Kim

    I tend to agree with you. I did not opt for a pre-nup either but IF someone felt the need to create one then I do believe that including social media would be a valued add. (If not -- and a separation / divorce *were* to occur, then I would recommend addressing that possibility at that time. (Granted - it may be too late by the time that was heard.)

    Bonita - I do understand your take as well and ultimately that is the only complete protection to safeguard against nude pics / videos. My thought, however, for the social media aspect would also be expanded to posting anything that would be harmful to the other person's reputation -- especially that could impact employment. (Example: Sharing a past addiction problem or having your (general) battle with depression become public knowledge without your permission. Whether fair or not, making this info available publicly can damage their reputation and potentially prohibit them from a job.)

    Obviously spouses trust (or should!) and share the very intimate details of both triumphs and struggles -- most often with the expectation that those stay within the relationship. Granted, I'm not certain how you could cover everything. Definitely something to think about.

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    No surprise, my thinking is the same as Kim's.

    I didn't go into my marriage with a back-up plan for it failing. I get why people do them, and it's important when there's big money at stake especially, but my husband is a lovely wonderful person and not vindictive and so those things aren't a concern for me.

    But if you're already on that road, then yes, add privacy/social media clauses. If you're smart.
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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    I have a slightly different take on the social media prenup. I know two people (so far?) whose spouses turned into "phone attached to hand 24/7" kind of people who paid more attention to their devices than their partners. Both of them had to not just threaten, but actually file for, divorce to get their spouse to start limiting their use of those devices and get back to being part of a functional family again. I see kids at the park pleading for mom to come play but she's busy texting for an hour. I see dads too busy posting a photo they just took of their kid at bat to see the great hit their kid just made. I see couples at dinner, both of them on separate devices. WTF??? I think a lot of people are forgetting that their devices should NOT be the primary object in their lives, and if I was marrying someone who showed a tendency toward obsession with a device, I would probably ask to document either an understanding of just how much is too much, or an agreement on when & where devices would not be allowed. Before Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan moved in together, supposedly she got him to agree to device-free date nights once a week, and one device-free weekend per month. Not a bad plan, I say.
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    Quote Originally Posted by freddieflounder101 View Post
    I didn't go into my marriage with a back-up plan for it failing. I get why people do them, and it's important when there's big money at stake especially, but my husband is a lovely wonderful person and not vindictive and so those things aren't a concern for me.

    But if you're already on that road, then yes, add privacy/social media clauses. If you're smart.
    I agree with everything you said. As an aside, I would say you are smart if you don't marry someone who is already on that road

    ~Bonita~

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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacers View Post
    I have a slightly different take on the social media prenup. I know two people (so far?) whose spouses turned into "phone attached to hand 24/7" kind of people who paid more attention to their devices than their partners. Both of them had to not just threaten, but actually file for, divorce to get their spouse to start limiting their use of those devices and get back to being part of a functional family again. I see kids at the park pleading for mom to come play but she's busy texting for an hour. I see dads too busy posting a photo they just took of their kid at bat to see the great hit their kid just made. I see couples at dinner, both of them on separate devices. WTF??? I think a lot of people are forgetting that their devices should NOT be the primary object in their lives, and if I was marrying someone who showed a tendency toward obsession with a device, I would probably ask to document either an understanding of just how much is too much, or an agreement on when & where devices would not be allowed. Before Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan moved in together, supposedly she got him to agree to device-free date nights once a week, and one device-free weekend per month. Not a bad plan, I say.
    There was an article that went viral awhile ago about people being on the phone while their kids were at the park. There were some very interesting responses that I would show you if I thought I could find them again. Some of the ones that stuck out the most were from people that work from home. Doing their work at the park so their kids could play and that they could support their families. Post from single mothers who commented about how such judgemental comments hurt her when the observers did not understand that they were doing work so they could afford to put food in their child's tummy. There were also comments from stay at home parents that said what you don't realise is that before you got to the park you had already spent several hours down on the floor playing with their child and just desperately needed a break while there child had fun playing with other children. As for texting while out to dinner, I can personally say from experience that I have texted my husband intimate things while out to dinner so that we can not be over heard and so that no one can read our lips.

    All of that to say that you do not know the circumstances around why someone is texting while their child is having fun at the play ground. If not spending a lot of time on devices is important to you, than by all means don't. However, someone else not having the same belief system as you does not make them a bad parent as your post implies.
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    ~Bonita~

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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Yeah, I don't think the people I see on their phones at the park are working, unless their work demands them to take a photo of their kid and immediately post it somewhere, repeatedly over the course of an hour while giggling at messages coming in and ignoring said child's pleas to play. I work from home, a lot, and I'll cop to ignoring my child for a while because I need to finish something on deadline, and I've made calls from the park or the ice cream store. I tell my son, give me ten minutes, and then I'll give you ten minutes. I have never, and will never, ignore them for an hour for work, and I honestly don't believe anyone does that because they're working from home. They do it because they are addicted to their devices.
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    Mega Poster mom3girls's Avatar
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    I love being on my phone at the park, oh wait no I dont. I dont take my kids to the park because we have a big back yard, then I dont have to keep as close of an eye on them.

    I am actually not a fan of prenups at all. I am so glad I was married before there was social media. So nice to not have to worry about that at all and after 16 years of marriage, and 18 years together I totally trust that my Dh would never post anything about me or himself that would be detrimental. We both know that all social media could be seen by our kids.
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