Promposals
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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    Default Promposals

    Apparently it's become a "thing" to make a big deal out of asking someone to prom, and also to video the occasion and post it online. And it's not just the kids who are asking celebrities and military heroes, or kids asking a good friend who may or may not say yes & a locker full of flowers might sway them; it's also guys making a big deal out of asking their girlfriend. Am I alone in thinking, if you're in enough of a relationship to be calling one another boyfriend & girlfriend, shouldn't prom kind of be an automatic assumption you have a date that night? And what happens if she (or he) says no? Do you set up all your props again & give it another try with someone else? Is this just something fun, or is it a sinister symptom of how the younger generation has gotten complacent with putting their entire lives online, and oversharing what used to be considered private moments, like gender reveal parties?

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    Only speaking to boy/girlfriends not assuming the other wants to go to the prom, it is not a given. DH and I were very serious in HS, however he did not want to go to my Prom or any of my schools other big dances. He went to a different school so I can understand him not wanting to go. That did not mean he did not take our relationship seriously.

    ~Bonita~

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    Posting Addict Spacers's Avatar
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    But wouldn't you have expected him, if he planned to go to prom, to ask you & not anyone else? And why would he need to (want to?) make a big deal out of asking you to your prom, since you wouldn't be thinking of going with anyone else?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spacers View Post
    But wouldn't you have expected him, if he planned to go to prom, to ask you & not anyone else? And why would he need to (want to?) make a big deal out of asking you to your prom, since you wouldn't be thinking of going with anyone else?
    I would not have expected him to ask anyone else, but I knew he was not a huge fan of Prom probably did not want to go.

    ~Bonita~

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    Posting Addict KimPossible's Avatar
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    I guess it rubs me the wrong way but I don't have very well formed opinions on why really.

    I think there is something not right with putting so much emphasis on this event....treating it almost like a large life event.

    I do think there is a trending obsession with documenting your entire life online, but I haven't really decided how bad that is. I do think there is something odd about events or rituals that might have come about mainly from this urge to have something to share online.

    And i might just have a negative attitude about it all because I've always hated proms and balls anyway. For someone like me, these events were the bane of my existence back then.

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    I'm with Kim (big surprise). I think it makes it into some huge life event and it's just an expensive dance. I wasn't a prom kid either, I had no interest in going. Not my scene.

    But yes, it's over-emphasized and is just not one of those truly important life events, like getting married, or graduating, or actually accomplishing something. It's paying money to go to a dance.

    And yeah, I think it's ridiculous to make such a huge fuss about inviting someone who's already your girlfriend. I assume at that point it's about status and making sure other people know what you did...no?
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    I do not think that it is bad to do something nice to mark the occasion and ask in a nice way. I do not think there would be anything wrong with giving a dozen roses while asking. I would think most people already know the other person is going to say yes when they ask someone to marry them. It is just a nice gesture to do it in a nice way. Yes, becoming engaged is bigger than prom, but it can still be nice. It is not necessary to do something like "So your going to Prom with me right?" Sort of just taking the relationship for granted. I also do not think it is necessary to do something very fancy either.

    ~Bonita~

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    I admit, I don't get it at all. I went to 5 proms in high school, 3 were assumed because I was dating someone during prom season, 1 was just to help my friend out with her ticket she paid for for a date that bailed, and my senior prom my friend asked me (he was gay but not out at that point so he wasn't bringing a guy). He asked me very casually in the hallway one day.

    I think, because this generation has such a focus on social media and documenting their daily lives that the prom is taking on huge meaning because, for them, it *has* to. A picture of your meal at Uno's can't be at the same level as the prom. It is a big event during high school life but they are elevating it to marriage proposals and that's silly. Of course, I wanted my marriage proposal to be private and not a group event.
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    Mega Poster mom3girls's Avatar
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    A couple years ago my nephew set up an elaborate plan to ask his girlfriend of 2 years to the prom, and he needed her best friend and her mom to help achieve it. She saw him with her best friend and Flipped out. It was weeks of him being in trouble and then when he just asked her the next year she was mad because he didnt do something big. (he has broken up with her)

    So my opinion is very negative about the promposal thing.
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