Resolutions.

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Resolutions.

So I went to the gym today for the first time in a couple of weeks and there were about a thousand cars there. Happy post New Year at a gym!!! Got me thinking about what an annual cycle this is at the gym, and about how by march things are back to normal. After seeing this cycle for years and years I can't tell if it is laughable or terribly depressing.

Do you make resolutions? Why or why not? If you do, do you care to share them?

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I like the one I saw on FB. My resolution is to remember to write 2013 when I have to date something. Smile

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Nope I don't. If I want to change something I change it. I don't do it because of a date.

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I never set resolutions, because so often they fail and it's so disheartening. Instead I set goals of things I want done throughout the year. I haven't done any this year, but my 'goals' for 2012 were to buy our first house (done) get pregnant (done) go out on more hikes in the summer (not done), etc.

I find anything totally set in stone like "I'm going to quit smoking" or "I want to loose 20, 50, 75 etc pounds" if you backslide once, it's enough to call off your resolution and not try any more.

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You know, i thought about "going back to the gym" for a resoultion. I had been going for a couple of years straight, and then things got so crazy and my support team of people i went with also started floundering and I lost the groove, which doesn't come naturally to me.

Honestly, i can't decide if going to the gym stresses me more, or less. I feel better physically when i go, and I like the time to myself...but the stress of doing the kids shuffle with Seamus, and how stressed out HE becomes when I'm gone makes it extremely hectic too. I found a sigh of relief coming to me when I stopped going and i could come home and get the laundry done early and the house back in order.

I can only go to the gym at the very end of the day...when Seamus gets out of work. Because the gym doesn't offer childcare in the late afternoon, only mornings which doesn't work well for working parents. So that means he has to go home with all of them and try to get dinner cooked and served while I'm gone and when i get home he's often kinda grumpy. Maybe if i could find a way to work it into the middle of my work day it would be better. But I'm at home and the gym is 25 minutes away.

Soooo....other than that, i have not considered any other resolutions! I wish i liked running. I can do that right outside of my house, but i just don't like it.

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My yoga teacher says she doesn't like resolutions because they are all about what's wrong with us, what we don't like about ourselves, what we think we SHOULD be doing that we're not, etc. She said she prefers to look ahead into a new year and decide what your focus should be, something positive that you can work towards vs. some flaw you have that makes you angry at yourself.

I agree with her completely, and I have something I'm focusing on for this year that is important to my own peace of mind.

My other goals, whether they're about health or losing weight or whatever, are the same goals I've been working on for a while. But I don't need to berate myself or set myself up to be disappointed...not something worth adding to my life. I have enough sh** going on already.

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Dh and I resolved to spend more time with each other, but we are not thinking of it as like a new years resolution, more of just a time to keep what is important in the fore front of our minds.
I want to continue studying nutrition this year, being really studying it for about 6 months so not really a new years resolution either.

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"freddieflounder101" wrote:

My yoga teacher says she doesn't like resolutions because they are all about what's wrong with us, what we don't like about ourselves, what we think we SHOULD be doing that we're not, etc. She said she prefers to look ahead into a new year and decide what your focus should be, something positive that you can work towards vs. some flaw you have that makes you angry at yourself.

I agree with her completely, and I have something I'm focusing on for this year that is important to my own peace of mind.

My other goals, whether they're about health or losing weight or whatever, are the same goals I've been working on for a while. But I don't need to berate myself or set myself up to be disappointed...not something worth adding to my life. I have enough sh** going on already.

I like this and pretty much agree with it. DH and I started a system of setting a weekly goal last year, and sharing it with one another on Sunday nights ~ we also set annual goals, 5 year goals, and 10 year goals......My main one year goal got flat busted with the breaking of my hip but oh well. Sh!t happens! Smile I learned bigger life lessons in that experience than I would have in accomplishing my goal, so I guess if you remain flexible with your goals its all good?

I think that the whole Christmas season is so crazy around here that the desire to evaluate and look ahead a little is a natural one ~ I don't know that I really set resolutions but I do take this little bit of quiet time to reassess and look forward to all that is coming, so I guess I do try to take this time to refocus some or adjust my sights a little. We have a lot of change coming up this year so its helpful to set my sights on what is coming or where I hope to be personally or as a wife or as a family this time next year, I guess, and we do write them down. My short term memory is awful thanks to the good times I had in my early 20's so blogging it or keeping it written down is a necessity Wink

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The biggest things I want to change in my life are so hard to convert to real world goals. For example

I want to be more patient
I want to enjoy the smaller moments more
I want to have less anxiety (which seems to have gotten worse this past year)

I find it hard to turn those into tangible goals...you know, so that I recognize those moments when i need to actually 'implement' them.

If that makes any sense.

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"KimPossible" wrote:

The biggest things I want to change in my life are so hard to convert to real world goals. For example

I want to be more patient
I want to enjoy the smaller moments more
I want to have less anxiety (which seems to have gotten worse this past year)

I find it hard to turn those into tangible goals...you know, so that I recognize those moments when i need to actually 'implement' them.

If that makes any sense.

So maybe you can translate some of that into more actionable items. I bet that all of that comes from not focusing on the present, that even when you're IN the moment, your mind is darting ahead and behind and around, so you're impatient as you've moved on in your mind, you're not relishing the small moments when they happen, and you're anxious for the same reason, thinking ahead or back. So maybe your focus can be to be more present, and there are great ways to do that. Yoga and meditation classes have taught me to stop and breathe, full deep breaths, just enough to give your mind something to do and re-center yourself. Does that make any kind of sense? It may help you find a more tangible way to make yourself happier. (Mostly it just sounds like you want to be happier and less stressed, an awesome goal in my book.)

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I like new years as a time of new beginnings and a time to refresh. Two examples would be schooling and loosing weight. I went through and evaluated everything the girls have learned this year compared to what they still need to learn for the year. Figuring and turning in grades for the semester. It is not a "resolution", but a time to evaluate what needs to be done. The second area is my weight. It is imperative for my health that I loose weight. I have been steadily working on it. In the past 2 years I have lost about 40 lbs, but I still have a long way to go. Thanksgiving and Christmas it is easy to get off track. New years is just a reasonable time to re-group and get back on track.

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I like Laurie's interpretation that it is more about a time to set some positive areas of focus instead of looking to try to "fix" things that are "wrong" with you.

So my goal is to stay in this sort of positive rut that I've worked myself into with this pregnancy. I am eating well, getting about an hour of exercise a day but not stressing myself out about it, and in general being more forgiving of myself and the idea that it's almost impossible to do everything all at once. For example, I have a tendency to stress when my house is less clean and tidy than I would like. The truth is, I work all day, then I pick up T, run errands, make dinner, clean up from dinner, put T to bed most nights because we both love reading the How to Train Your Dragon books before bed, I already do a load of laundry most nights ....by the time it's all done, how much time do I realistically have to get the place spotless every night if I would also like to sit down and unwind for a little while too? For whatever reason, this pregnancy has made me much more blase about it, like "Oh well, if it's not spic and span tonight, it will still be there for me tomorrow. C'est la vie." I want to continue on all of that, because I feel like I'm in a really good place right now.

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I used to always set the goal to lose weight, but I was never serious about it until 2 years ago. I think the fact that I turned it more into creating a healthier lifestyle at that point was what made it stick for me. 2011 was when I joined Weight Watchers and started Couch to 5K. I set fairly small goals to start out with, such as finishing my first race and losing 10% of my body weight - much better than saying "I'm going to run a marathon and lose 60 lbs". Before I would start cutting back on calories and work out for about two weeks, planning to lose the weight right away. When I didn't lose 10 lbs right away, I just gave up and said screw it....this will never work.

I think, like Laurie said, it's more important to focus on the positive side of your goals. Turning it that way for me helped me lose 62 lbs, finish two half marathons, and set my sights for finishing a marathon this fall.

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"mommydearest" wrote:

I think, like Laurie said, it's more important to focus on the positive side of your goals. Turning it that way for me helped me lose 62 lbs, finish two half marathons, and set my sights for finishing a marathon this fall.

Great job!

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Thanks Bonita! If someone told me two years ago I'd run a half marathon, I would have laughed in their face. And it's kind of shocking to look back at my pictures from a few years ago...I definitely didn't see myself as large as I was (keep in mind that I'm about 5'2")

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I made one New Year's resolution many years ago that I've been able to keep: to not make any more New Year's resolutions.

I actually consider every change of the seasons to be an opportune time to reevaluate things in my life, reinforce the positive, and do what I can to minimize the negative. It's part of that whole Taoist thing I do. I just noticed the other day that winter is (as it always does) drying out my skin so I'm trying to incorporate a moisture treatment into my nightly routine, and while I appreciate not having scaly skin, I'm also finding those extra few minutes of "me time" are rather nice!

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"mommydearest" wrote:

Thanks Bonita! If someone told me two years ago I'd run a half marathon, I would have laughed in their face. And it's kind of shocking to look back at my pictures from a few years ago...I definitely didn't see myself as large as I was (keep in mind that I'm about 5'2")

I think you look great in both pictures! It is hard for me to see what I look like too, until after you have lost it.

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Carolyn, you look amazing!!!

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I am working on eating healthier. This is convenient in that we have to move in 3 months and are saving money for it. So we have banned the purchase of most junk food until after we move. I am going to allow a couple of small payday purchases like a bottle of pop or two for the family, but other than that no junk. Hopefully this will help our bank account and our diets. I would like to lose some weight to help my back feel better.

And, I am going to actually remember to write 2013! I failed already and my first date of the day was fixed from 2012. lol.

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You look great Carolyn!!!

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Thanks ladies Smile ...I feel so much better, too.

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We now have a family resolution! We were talking today about how much excess people have now and we decided to go a whole year without buying anything new that is not absolutely necessary. I am sure the kids will need some clothes this year, but we are only going to buy bare necessities. We are pretty excited about this, we will see if the kids still are after a couple of months

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It's all psychological imo. It's like when you are going to start a diet and it HAS to be a Monday.... New year is somewhat similar.

I try not to make resolutions either, like people have set you're setting yourself up for disaster. Subconsciously though, I am on a path to try and lose a few lbs. I just haven't said it out loud yet!

xx

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I resolved last year to read out loud to my kids every day. It was a good resolution, I'm going to do it again this year.

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Carolyn -- you know I've been following your progress for ages on the WW board. You are amazing and inspirational. The rest of us have slipped back and are still struggling but you are awesome and amazing. So glad it is giving you such happiness. Well deserved!!!

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I don't do resolutions. If there is something I want to change, we just go for it. I'm NOT patient, and would not wait until a new year came to do something I wanted done. lol

I know I have work to do... lol But I try on a normal basis.

I would like to be more patient. lol And I would like to calm my anxiety down. And I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY want to be pregnant. While it's not a resolution, it's certainly my wish for the new year! Smile

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"mom3girls" wrote:

We now have a family resolution! We were talking today about how much excess people have now and we decided to go a whole year without buying anything new that is not absolutely necessary. I am sure the kids will need some clothes this year, but we are only going to buy bare necessities. We are pretty excited about this, we will see if the kids still are after a couple of months

I love love love consignment stores. I keep a donation bag in the corner near the kids' closet & my kids know when they outgrow something, to put it in that bag. When it's full, we take it in & they pick out a bunch of "new" stuff, and it barely costs me anything with the credit from things I've sold in the past. And the store I drop off with, donates anything they don't accept or that doesn't sell to local charities & needy families. Win win win! Blum 3

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"Spacers" wrote:

I love love love consignment stores. I keep a donation bag in the corner near the kids' closet & my kids know when they outgrow something, to put it in that bag. When it's full, we take it in & they pick out a bunch of "new" stuff, and it barely costs me anything with the credit from things I've sold in the past. And the store I drop off with, donates anything they don't accept or that doesn't sell to local charities & needy families. Win win win! Blum 3

We do this too. We have what I call the thrift store bin. It all goes in there and we donate it every time it's full.

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"smsturner" wrote:

I would like to be more patient. lol And I would like to calm my anxiety down. And I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY want to be pregnant. While it's not a resolution, it's certainly my wish for the new year! Smile

Aww, I really hope this year is the year for you.

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"Spacers" wrote:

I love love love consignment stores. I keep a donation bag in the corner near the kids' closet & my kids know when they outgrow something, to put it in that bag. When it's full, we take it in & they pick out a bunch of "new" stuff, and it barely costs me anything with the credit from things I've sold in the past. And the store I drop off with, donates anything they don't accept or that doesn't sell to local charities & needy families. Win win win! Blum 3

We do this too! But I dont buy used shoes, so 3 of my kids will at least need that. I think the oldest feet are done growing

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"freddieflounder101" wrote:

Carolyn -- you know I've been following your progress for ages on the WW board. You are amazing and inspirational. The rest of us have slipped back and are still struggling but you are awesome and amazing. So glad it is giving you such happiness. Well deserved!!!

Thanks Laurie....I know I couldn't have done it without everyone's support. I miss us posting on the WW board together Sad - I'll have to check it since I've been bad about doing that lately :oops: .

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My resolution is to get in shape for my friend's wedding later this year (I'll be a bridesmaid). I tried to encourage her to wait until next year but NOoOoOO Wink Luckily, I won't have to wear yellow.