Sexualized grocery shopping experience?

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Sexualized grocery shopping experience?

[h=1]Stop Sexualizing My Grocery Shopping[/h]
This morning, like so many other moms, dads and caregivers, I took my kids to the grocery store.
It was a nice little trip. My kids enjoyed the ginormous kiddie "car" cart they insisted I push around the store. We talked about healthy foods as we picked up bananas in the produce section. We talked about "sometimes" foods when I picked up cookies in the packaged goods.
And then we talked about boobs and naked ladies.
WHY was I talking about boobs with my 4-year-old daughter in the grocery store? Oh, because this magazine cover was in plain view of my kids as we checked out.


"Mommy, why are that girl's boobies showing?" she said to me.
Err....
"Mommy, she's in PANTIES!"
Um....
"Mommy, that girl doesn't have any clothes on!!"
Well....
Okay, I am so not a prude when it comes to certain things. I listen to Howard Stern daily. I read Fifty Shades of Grey. I am all for freedom of speech and expression, but why do I need to have boobs in my face and the face of my kids at the GROCERY STORE?
Really, this is not a conversation I felt like having at the grocery store. Not only do I need to find a way to explain to my daughter why this woman is freezing her boobs off on an apparent Alaskan cruise, I need to find a way to tell her -- SOMEHOW -- that no woman looks like this. This was an airbrushed to hell photo that is in no way representative of what real women look like.
I mean, Kate Upton may be a supermodel, but I am going to bet she has at least a few flaws that were airbrushed, no?
Well, I did what any social media savvy mom would do, I contacted the store through a private message on Facebook.


I also posted it to my own Facebook page, which prompted a rather lively discussion not so much about the over-sexualization of women, but about the lack of common sense various media use when placing these types of images in places where children can see them.
Don't Bite the Hand That Feeds You
When will stores and brands realize that MOMS (women) do most if not all the shopping for their families? And, I would argue, that most moms may find images like this offensive -- especially when placed in plain view at the grocery store.
Call me crazy, but I am more likely to shop at stores that DON'T offend me.
Really though, it is just a sad commentary on the way women are portrayed in the media. And while images like this will never go by the wayside, it's important to teach our children that it is not OK for women to be portrayed like this, and these images are not representative of what real women look like.
But thankfully, us moms can make a difference. Just ask Kelly Brown who blogs at The Turnip Farmer. She graciously "fixed" the magazine cover in question JUST FOR ME.
And to quote Kelly, "I put them in stripes to make them look fat."

Courtesy of Kelly Brown
I think it's an amazing improvement, don't you agree?
This post originally appeared on No Sleep 'Til College.


Read here to see comments: Erica Voll: Stop Sexualizing My Grocery Shopping

I feel like this one combines the "fat shaming" thread with the "talking to kids about sex" thread, a little. As with most articles these days, I found the comments section to be as interesting as the article itself ~ there were plenty of "Way to go Mom, she looks so much prettier in the sweater!" To: "Oh poor you you had to be a Mom for a second and have a discussion with your kids" sort of comments. What do you think, and did any comments jump out to you in particular as being especially right (or wrong?)?Do the magazine covers at stores bother you?

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My kids have been going to the store with me since birth, and there have been magazines like that since birth. If my girls see and ask me about it, I tell them that is how some people dress but that is not how we dress.

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"Oh poor you you had to be a Mom for a second and have a discussion with your kids" sort of comments.

Haha, I admit, that was my first reaction too, like "Oh noes, you had to talk to your kid?!? At the GROCERY STORE?!? Saints preserve us..." LOL

I don't know. Magazine covers like that don't really bother me. I think she has a point about talking to her daughter about how not all ladies look like that, or need to look like that, because I do think that the media plays a big roll in the way that women look at their own bodies. But the "sexy" peice of it doesn't bother me. You could see about that much skin at the beach too, and it wouldn't be my place to insist that the sexy ladies cover themselves, but to talk to my kids about whether or not I think it's okay to dress that way.

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I think Claire might be more puzzled by the juxtaposition of the bikini and icebergs. KWIM? And if she asked me why the lady wasn't wearing a top (she doesn't really get what 'sexy' means) maybe I'd tell her it was warmer to wear a parka than a bikini top, being in Antarctica and all. As to how I feel about it, I don't really care all that much about these magazine covers but if DD asks me seriously one day about why there are lots of girls on magazines who are wearing this or that then we'll talk about it openly and honestly. But I'm not going out of my way to point out this stuff and then intentionally get into a discussion about the oversexualization of women in the media.

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I find women's magazines are as bad or worse. DD1 is starting to read things and ask what they mean. I cringe at the day she reads a Cosmo cover while we are in line at the grocery store and asks me to explain those. While having the sex talk with her doesn't bother me, I don't want to explain 7 ways to have mind blowing orgasms while in the grocery store line.

Generally I have no problem with magazine covers that are on display at the grocery store. The other day we were at a news stand at Harvard Square and all the magazines on display at the counter where you normally see Time or Cosmo or People were some form of porn magazine. Those covers wold be inappropriate for children. My husband joked that you could tell the customers were university students!

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Yeah, Cosmo's and Maxim's covers are just as bad as the SI ones

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That's SO not on my list to be worried about.

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Maybe where I live stores are more cautious but, I saw this mag in the store but the way it was displayed, there was an opaque plastic sheet built into the display case, effectively covering her bits.

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My 4 year old actually saw this cover the other night on CNN, and I didn't really think twice about it. It's everywhere. It's no worse than the huge Victoria's Secret posters you walk by in the mall. Sophia said "Mommy, she's showing her boobs!" and I said "yep, she sure is" That was pretty much our conversation about it. I don't even think at her age I need to get into "not all women look like that". She knows that, because no one she knows looks like that, most certainly not her mommy.

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I just dont get the uproar over this cover? I dont love that my 5 year old can read covers, the other day it was "Look Kelly Clarkson found love at last" and then "Brandi cheated first" then "Who is Brandi and what is cheating"
I dont worry to much about them seeing yet one more body that is fairly unattainable, they see it in media. We have been combating that message for years.

There is a dove ad, that shows a woman and what she goes through in hair and makeup and then what they can do with airbrushing, it is an awesome video that all of my girls have seen. Very enlightening

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I just dont get the uproar over this cover? I dont love that my 5 year old can read covers, the other day it was "Look Kelly Clarkson found love at last" and then "Brandi cheated first" then "Who is Brandi and what is cheating"
I dont worry to much about them seeing yet one more body that is fairly unattainable, they see it in media. We have been combating that message for years.

There is a dove ad, that shows a woman and what she goes through in hair and makeup and then what they can do with airbrushing, it is an awesome video that all of my girls have seen. Very enlightening

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I don't get the uproar either. I support her in writing to the store to express her concern but I hardly believe this was the first time her kids encountered a cover like this.

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We hate it, and I have been known to turn magazines around in the racks at check out. It is just wrong..

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Jace has never question or commented about any magazines during checkout. Covers like that don't bother me. I also love reading Cosmo, lol.

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Our grocery store has a kid friendly lane with stickers and picture books instead of magazines and candy. My kiddies are too busy handing me groceries to put on the belt to care about magazine covers though. But no worries, I've already had the talk about what type of clothing choices are acceptable in our house with my girls. I think it is a talk that all families should have from a young age.

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People tend to laugh at my kids, they are always pointing to clothes on the magazines and saying "inappropriate" and people in line think is pretty comical

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"Rivergallery" wrote:

We hate it, and I have been known to turn magazines around in the racks at check out. It is just wrong..

I should do this. The ATMs at convenience stores are always next to the porn section of the magazine aisle in this country. Never mind my kids, I'm uncomfortable with this.

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I was thinking about this thread last night because we watch American Idol when the kids are up (my 4 year old loves to hear the singing) and Mariah Carey seems to love to have her cleavage hanging out not much different from the chick on this magazine cover. For me, it's not going to make me not watch the show with my kids around. They are going to see it everywhere. Maybe if I had little boys I would feel differently. I just said to Sophia last night "do you think it's good that she wears those clothes with her boobs showing like that?" and she scrunched up her nose and said "no way" and I said "nah, I think she should put them away. We're not interested in seeing those. I think she should save them for her husband and her babies."

This kind of goes along with the sex ed conversation to me. I can't (or don't want to) shelter my kids from what's out there...I want to have a conversation about it. And Lisa it cracks me up that your girls say "inappropriate" when they see that stuff. My nieces and nephews do the same thing...they are older than my kids and their favorite saying is "that is so inappropriate"

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"SID081108" wrote:

I was thinking about this thread last night because we watch American Idol when the kids are up (my 4 year old loves to hear the singing) and Mariah Carey seems to love to have her cleavage hanging out not much different from the chick on this magazine cover. For me, it's not going to make me not watch the show with my kids around. They are going to see it everywhere. Maybe if I had little boys I would feel differently. I just said to Sophia last night "do you think it's good that she wears those clothes with her boobs showing like that?" and she scrunched up her nose and said "no way" and I said "nah, I think she should put them away. We're not interested in seeing those. I think she should save them for her husband and her babies."

This kind of goes along with the sex ed conversation to me. I can't (or don't want to) shelter my kids from what's out there...I want to have a conversation about it. And Lisa it cracks me up that your girls say "inappropriate" when they see that stuff. My nieces and nephews do the same thing...they are older than my kids and their favorite saying is "that is so inappropriate"

But she wasn't wearing that dress on the cover of a magazine in your kid's face in the grocery store. She was on American Idol and truth be told I don't find what she was wearing to be all that inappropriate for that show. I've seen worse at the Grammies or the Oscars. Plus, what your (general) kids watch on TV is something that parents have control over. If the content of the show or what the judges are wearing you find to be inappropriate, then watch something else.

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Cleavage just isn't a big deal to me. I show more skin when I wear a bikini and I do all summer. I think it's an over reaction.

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My stock answer to questions like, "Why are her breasts hanging out?" and "Why isn't she wearing pants?" is, "Because I'm not her mother." Blum 3 DH seems to be having some interesting conversations with Weston when I'm not around, too. We saw that magazine at the store the other day. Weston pointed to her chest & said, "Those are fake." The checker actually had to walk away because he was snorting while trying not to laugh. :biglaugh:

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Is it wrong that my first reaction was wow, she's cute??? Haha. At least this one model looks like she eats every once in awhile. Most of them are all ribs. Ew.

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"Spacers" wrote:

My stock answer to questions like, "Why are her breasts hanging out?" and "Why isn't she wearing pants?" is, "Because I'm not her mother." Blum 3 DH seems to be having some interesting conversations with Weston when I'm not around, too. We saw that magazine at the store the other day. Weston pointed to her chest & said, "Those are fake." The checker actually had to walk away because he was snorting while trying not to laugh. :biglaugh:

Hahah!!! Me too. If I were her mom, she would be wearing pants with her coat. Who wears a coat without pants?? lol

That's funny about your son!!

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"ClairesMommy" wrote:

But she wasn't wearing that dress on the cover of a magazine in your kid's face in the grocery store. She was on American Idol and truth be told I don't find what she was wearing to be all that inappropriate for that show. I've seen worse at the Grammies or the Oscars. Plus, what your (general) kids watch on TV is something that parents have control over. If the content of the show or what the judges are wearing you find to be inappropriate, then watch something else.

Hmmm, I can't for the life of me figure out how I debated any of this but okay. Yes, if people don't want to watch American Idol they can definitely watch something else. :confused:

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"SID081108" wrote:

I was thinking about this thread last night because we watch American Idol when the kids are up (my 4 year old loves to hear the singing) and Mariah Carey seems to love to have her cleavage hanging out not much different from the chick on this magazine cover. For me, it's not going to make me not watch the show with my kids around. They are going to see it everywhere. Maybe if I had little boys I would feel differently. I just said to Sophia last night "do you think it's good that she wears those clothes with her boobs showing like that?" and she scrunched up her nose and said "no way" and I said "nah, I think she should put them away. We're not interested in seeing those. I think she should save them for her husband and her babies."

This kind of goes along with the sex ed conversation to me. I can't (or don't want to) shelter my kids from what's out there...I want to have a conversation about it. And Lisa it cracks me up that your girls say "inappropriate" when they see that stuff. My nieces and nephews do the same thing...they are older than my kids and their favorite saying is "that is so inappropriate"

Does this refresh your memory a bit? It's a completely different venue, that is my point. You can't compare a magazine cover in a grocery store to what someone wears on American Idol.

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That's funny. I was being completely lighthearted, saying that it reminded me of this thread, not coming back to debate. I never said it shouldn't bother someone to see it in the grocery store (just like I didn't say that TV is the same venue as the grocery store, or that people have to watch American Idol)...I simply said it doesn't bother me, because my girls see it everywhere, and this was just another example of where they see it. I'm sorry if I offended you by coming back to make any type of comparison that you felt was not appropriate.

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"SID081108" wrote:

That's funny. I was being completely lighthearted, saying that it reminded me of this thread, not coming back to debate. I never said it shouldn't bother someone to see it in the grocery store (just like I didn't say that TV is the same venue as the grocery store, or that people have to watch American Idol)...I simply said it doesn't bother me, because my girls see it everywhere, and this was just another example of where they see it. I'm sorry if I offended you by coming back to make any type of comparison that you felt was not appropriate.

Carrie, you don't need to apologize for anything and I'm not offended by anything and I don't find any comparison 'inappropriate'. It's your comparison. I was only challenging you on your comparison. I didn't get it. I still don't. If you were only making a comment with no intention of defending it than that's okay. We (general) don't have to debate everything.

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Today I took the kids out to lunch, and when we went to pay at the cashier, there was a newspaper lying there with a headline about the nanny who killed the children she was looking after. It was horrible. I flipped it over before my son saw it, and the guy behind the counter looked at me quizzically. I explained and he took a look himself and quickly moved the paper elsewhere.

News headlines like that bother me a lot more than sexy photos on a magazine cover. That said, I don't think any action should be taken to deal with it, it's just one of the things I have to handle as a parent.

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"Potter75" wrote:

Cleavage just isn't a big deal to me. I show more skin when I wear a bikini and I do all summer. I think it's an over reaction.

Some of us don't think bikini's are appropriate Wink

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Some of us are weird. What can ya do?

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Living in Las Vegas, she's fully clothed compared to what's on bilboards out here lol. I don't necessarily like it, but it doesn't shock me and ads like it certainly aren't going to stop... sex sells.