I absolutely think things like this should be able to be used in custody judgements. It's not so much the pageants(which I'll admit I can't stand) but I would absolutely question her judgement in the care of her daughter due the the costumes she puts her in and the dances she allows her to do. They are disgusting for a little girl and put her short term safety and long term mental health in question.
I think the courts take all information into account when desiding custody. If a parent will not stop the pageants even if it is clear they are not what is best for the child, that the judge will that into count.
I do think that custody battles are very difficult. Both parents should have a say in what their child does unless one of them is deemed unfit for some reason. I pray I am never in that situation. DH would never give up his girls.
That's ridiculous. Did the psychologist ask the Dad what activities he was going to enroll her in? This woman isn't very smart, but to imply that a child should be taken out of the home because a psychologist doesn't like pageants is freaking ridiculous and a waste of time.
I just can't see it as a waste of time to have experts who represent the child talk to them and present their expert opinions to the judge. IME, they want to see the entire picture and truly decide what is in the child's best interest.
Now, if he hasn't expressed any intentions of enrolling in her in activities, it's not an issue. If he later decides he wants to enroll her in something, the mom can raise an objection to it. (See my previous post about enrolling kids in soccer.)
Maybe the child has reached a point where she just doesn't want to do this anymore. Maybe she said she would rather be with her dad. Should her feelings be disregarded? While kids don't get to "decide" until a certain age, they should be listened to.
The last paragraph is kind of pointless don't you think? We don't know if this little girl loves pageants or if she just does them to please her mother. It is a waste of time to pull a kid out of the home that is the best for them just because of a hobby that many people hate despite not having an understanding of it. I'm sick of reading how horrible they are and how everyone thinks the kids parents are terrible despite not having an open mind or asking the ACTUAL people involved how they feel. ONE person shouldn't be able to pull a child out of a home that is otherwise better than the other one just because he doesn't like an activity the home chosen by a previous judge for I"m guessing good reasons.
I'm not judging pageants or any other activity on its face. There are many people who love them and gain self-confidence from them.
This issue is not the pageant per se; it's whether the child is in the best environment.
I don't think she should lose custody of her child.
I do however detest those beauty pageants!
Me - Kristi, 29
DD - Leia, July 5 2008
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