Sickness

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AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568
Sickness

I confess to really just wanting all of your opinions.

How long after your child was sick do you wait before you allow them to be around other children (not your own children)?

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I confess to really just wanting all of your opinions.

How long after your child was sick do you wait before you allow them to be around other children (not your own children)?

I play it by ear for the most part.

Some examples,
Lillian had the barf bug the Friday before Easter...it was really fast and quick and by the middle of the night it was over and she woke up Saturday morning feel just like her old self. We had a town Easter Egg hunt that morning and even though she felt fine and really wanted to go i told her she couldn't. Had it been a school day, school rules would have prevented her from going to school as it hadn't been 24 hours. Incidentally that night she started barfing my 11 year old had a friend over. I sent a text to her mother just informing her that my 8 year old had started throwing up in case she wanted her daughter to go home.

Actually....thinking about it, other than that, i really just play it by school rules and how they feel themselves. If they are sick as a dog and miserable...then i wouldn't bring them around anyone else. But if they don't have a fever but feel good enough to eat and play and go about the day like other days...I'll send them to school even if they have a nasty cough and boogery nose.

If someone was coming over with a very little one, or their first child, and one of my kids was exhibiting these symptoms, i'd probably warn the parent.

Honestly, i know it really ticks some people when people bring their symptom-showing kids out in public but.....sorry, thats what i do.

ETA: I should add that school rules are no barfing for 24 hours or no fever for 24 hours (i do cheat these numbers soemtimes...if its been like 19 hours), no conjunctivitis unless on antibiotic for at least 24 hours.

Joined: 03/08/03
Posts: 3189

If I'm not sure -- as in, I think my kid is fine now, but who knows? -- then I ask the other parent if they are comfortable still coming over/playing. If it's a school issue, we wait 24 hours after fever, since that's what they ask for.

Throwing up is different, I think you can tell when your kid has recovered. Mostly.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

Depends. With most of the stuff they come down with they're probably contagious before they even have symptoms. I don't prevent my kids from going anywhere if they just have a common cold. If they're puking or super sick with high fever I'll keep them home for at least a day, maybe two, but not just to keep them from making other kids sick but because THEY feel like crap. The only place I want to be when I'm uber sick is at home, laying on the couch watching TV, so I let them do the same Smile A nice lazy day covered with a blankie eating popsicles and watching cartoons is sometimes warranted!

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

oh man this discussion has caused me to read an interesting article on the wonder virus that is Norovirus...and how well its 'designed'

Its an interesting read..if you can 'stomach' it. Get it? ha...mom jokes.

The Norovirus: A Study in Puked Perfection – Phenomena: The Loom

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

dp

SID081108's picture
Joined: 06/03/09
Posts: 1348

"KimPossible" wrote:

oh man this discussion has caused me to read an interesting article on the wonder virus that is Norovirus...and how well its 'designed'

Its an interesting read..if you can 'stomach' it. Get it? ha...mom jokes.

The Norovirus: A Study in Puked Perfection – Phenomena: The Loom

Interesting article! Thanks for sharing Smile

fuchsiasky's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 955

I wait until the active symptoms are gone or on their way out. So I won't expose other kids to her if she has lots of green snot, a really nasty cough or is pukey. But if there is just a residual runny nose, cough or not quite back to 100% tummy and for the most part it is gone then I will let her see other kids and go to school.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"fuchsiasky" wrote:

I wait until the active symptoms are gone or on their way out. So I won't expose other kids to her if she has lots of green snot, a really nasty cough or is pukey. But if there is just a residual runny nose, cough or not quite back to 100% tummy and for the most part it is gone then I will let her see other kids and go to school.

How do you accomplish this? Sometimes my kids will have green snot for a week...but will feel great 4 out of 5 of those days. And nasty coughs seem to last forever. Aodhan has had this gross cough for weeks but is feeling great.

My kids would miss so much school if i waited for symptoms like that to go away.

SID081108's picture
Joined: 06/03/09
Posts: 1348

"KimPossible" wrote:

How do you accomplish this? Sometimes my kids will have green snot for a week...but will feel great 4 out of 5 of those days. And nasty coughs seem to last forever. Aodhan has had this gross cough for weeks but is feeling great.

My kids would miss so much school if i waited for symptoms like that to go away.

Ditto. My two year old was snotty and coughing for a majority of last year. Literally, at least 6 months out of the year she had a nasty cough and green snot. Every time I walk into her class at daycare some kid has green snot running down their face. There is just no way working parents can keep them home for that. Luckily, her immune system must have finally gotten its act together because she hasn't been sick at all in 3-4 months. Definitely a record since she started day care.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

FYI if you missed it on the other thread, DD threw up early this AM and has no symptoms of anything since. Has played and acted normal all day. Trying to decide if I should follow my normal 24 hour rule, or let her go to a church activity this evening.

If she was acting at all sick, I would keep her home for sure.

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

Sometimes they just eat something that doesn't agree with them and they don't have a stomach virus.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

"ClairesMommy" wrote:

Sometimes they just eat something that doesn't agree with them and they don't have a stomach virus.

This is what I was thinking. She had the stomach bug a few weeks ago and acted very differently than she is now.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

"KimPossible" wrote:

Honestly, i know it really ticks some people when people bring their symptom-showing kids out in public but.....sorry, thats what i do.

ETA: I should add that school rules are no barfing for 24 hours or no fever for 24 hours (i do cheat these numbers soemtimes...if its been like 19 hours), no conjunctivitis unless on antibiotic for at least 24 hours.

I'm one of those people!

Drives me crazy when I drop my kids off at the gym and some kid is leaking green goo or sneezing over my healthy kids because Mom couldn't miss a workout. I'm in the "its selfish" camp Smile

ange84's picture
Joined: 12/28/09
Posts: 6564

It depends on the illness. Snot ot a cough, off to daycare, they probably all have it anyway, and if I kept my son home for every cough he had I would no longer have a job because in the cooler months he gets asthma.

Stomach bug requires 24 hours from daycare after the last vomit or soft stool. If he vomits once at night and is then fine off he goes, thats generally ate too much or something didn't agree with him.

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

"ange84" wrote:

It depends on the illness. Snot ot a cough, off to daycare, they probably all have it anyway, and if I kept my son home for every cough he had I would no longer have a job because in the cooler months he gets asthma.

Stomach bug requires 24 hours from daycare after the last vomit or soft stool. If he vomits once at night and is then fine off he goes, thats generally ate too much or something didn't agree with him.

The bolded is how I feel. I have an at home daycare and my general rule is that they can come unless they are actively sick, ie throwing up or fever, or if my kids are actively sick. Beyond that, they all share germs anyways. As long as the child feels well enough to come, then they come.

ange84's picture
Joined: 12/28/09
Posts: 6564

Yup, I also feel that I would rather him build that immunity now and miss days of daycare if he has to than miss lots of school when he starts because he has such low immunity.
Last year chicken pox went around his room, I asked if my DS had been playing with that child a lot in the hopes he would catch it.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

Yeah, it isn't like my children are precious snowflakes who live within a bubble and will (or did) fall dreadfully ill when they started school. They spend their days at playgrounds and restaurants and at the gym kids zone and at play dates and in preschool and and in supermarkets and a billion other places where they have the wonderful opportunity to get ill. I just don't take pleasure in intentionally exposing them to other peoples KNOWINGLY ill children against our will because other people are too important to stay home and take care of their ill child for a morning. I think that their child (and mine) deserve better. I see it as a public health issue. There are many times when we are carrying around germs before we know we are infectious, that can't be helped. Schools and hospitals and whatnot have a 24 hour rule for a reason. Its simple common sense and kindness to others to observe it.

Joined: 08/17/04
Posts: 2226

I had extended family that would do that. Kid would be throwing up in the morning, with a fever and they would drive down to visit. My grandma, me while pregnant, with littles around. Really? I, and my kids, might get sick because you felt like taking a drive on Saturday. Drove me crazy.

Rivergallery's picture
Joined: 05/23/03
Posts: 1301

We get over illnesses fairly quickly and do not have many.. I have never had to take my kiddos in for a cold/flu/stomach bug. I have been able to treat it at home without it progressing.
I make sure they feel fine. My kids are very good at telling me exactly how they feel.
My husband is more conservative than I am, and if they have any sort of cough we don't take them.. especially to church.
But we would take them to adult friends homes, with no kids or ailing parents if they have a little cough for example.

ETA- I want to be clear I do not think it is necessarily what we do or do not do as to the reason my kiddos are not very ill, we do go lots of places. I think it is lucky that they don't come down hard with typical ailments, and Home Remedies have worked so far.. I am super thankful for this as I deal with chronic illnesses and my oldest is asthmatic, and has allergies some severe.. so we have gone in a few times for that.. but not the cold/flu/stomach issues.. because frankly they haven't gotten bad and I am grateful.. If they had gotten bad I would be more careful about them being out I think.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

My big issue with people getting upset over the boogery noses or the yucky cough is this mentally constructed notion that its a good tell of if someone is contagious or not.

First, to expect people to stay inside until the cold is gone completely is totally unreasonable...but i think we can all agree on that right?

Second green snot is not a great indicator of when someone is the most contagious. Sure its pyschologically alarming(extreme word, can't think of a better one), but its not accurate

When you catch a cold and mucus production goes up, sinuses may also get blocked, so these cavities can get overgrown with bacteria that might lead to a sinus infection.

But, according to Metson, people with a cold are not most contagious to others when they are producing the most mucus. "The volume of mucus doesn't correlate with the number of viral particles shed."

Rather, Metson suggested that your level of contagion is more closely linked with where you are in the cold cycle. "People are shedding the most viral particles early on in a cold -- when you are incubating the virus and having early symptoms."

Page 2: You Think It's Mucus, but It's Not - ABC News

Most links I have found about the contagious period says that you are most contagious about 2 - 4 days in. My kids look boogery and have gross coughs way beyond that.

3)Lets not forget that people are contagious before they even start showing symptoms of the common cold

To sum it up, the 'keep your kids at home because they look and sound sick' is a false sense of security and makes little sense. Trying to prevent the spread of germs by keeping people home for really extensive periods of time, especially based on how boogery they are, is irrational and impractical. You are already exposed plenty. The best defense against germs is good hand-washing and teaching kids to not put their hands in their mouths so much. But in the end, they are kids...kids are grubby and poor with hygiene and they get sick. Ultimately if my kids feel good, i'm taking them out with me. If they don't feel good, i keep them home. And thats about it.

ETA: the first page of that article also talks about green mucus and how the color really isn't much to base anything on.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

Oh, yeah, I just kindov threw that out there. I mean, there are examples of it concretely in this thread alone ~ the idea that germs are made for sharing ~ after all, its good for the immunity of others and we ought be grateful for it!

That is what I disagree with. Don't make that decision for me and mine, thanks. I've seen kids with bright red cheeks crying for their mom. Shiny eyes, you know ~ kids who LOOK sick. I brought my kids sick to a preschool Christmas program once ~ will never forgive myself. THey felt awful and I felt TERRIBLE. It was so selfish of me, I just tried to talk myself into them being okay, because I selfishly wANTED to see their program! I've seen kids who have thrown up at our gym, or at preschool, kids who I saw LOOK terrible when I dropped off my kids. That is selfish. The kids don't feel well, whatever the color of their snot, and it isn't good parenting to make them go out, and it isn't kind to my kids to expose them to whatever those kids obviously actively have. It reminds me of the article where the Mom admitted to dosing her feverish kid for the sole purpose of getting her admitted to school for just long enough for the tylenol to wear off and the school nurse to send her home. Yes, selfish. Snot or no. THat child should be home, for that poor childs sake, and for my childs sake.

Yes yes, we all know that every mother "knows their own child best" and every mother is practically a dr able to discern whether the child ate something which disagreed with them or if it is a stomach virus............but if hospitals and schools ask us to wait 24 hours......might there be a valid reason? I tend to think so, is all. It just isn't all that big a hardship, generally. Its 24 hours, not days, you know?

mom3girls's picture
Joined: 01/09/07
Posts: 1537

I tend to err on the side of caution. I dont think my kids are going to learn anything if I send them to school and they are not feeling 100%. I also dont want them to go with a small cold and be exposed, while their immune system is depleted, and end up with some kind of secondary infections. Last week I kept dd#3 home one day because I couldnt ascertain if she was getting a cold, or if it was just seasonal allergies,

As a teacher can I say, PLEASE keep your kids home if they are sick. I cant tell you how many times I hear "I barfed last night" or "I was up all night because my throat hurt"

ange84's picture
Joined: 12/28/09
Posts: 6564

If my son looks or is acting sick he stays home, if he has snot and a cold and is fine, then he goes. Unfortunately I am not lucky enough to be a SAHM, in fact I am the primary breadwinner in my household, if I lose my job we are in serious trouble, if I run out of sick days and have to take leave without pay, we are in trouble if it happens often enough. My husbands boss does not allow sick days to care for children, in fact other than his boss I believe my husband is the only one at his workplace with a child, so again all sickness has to be dealt with by me. There have been times where my son has been running a low fever for days with nothing else wrong, say that happened twice a year and ran for 3 days each time, thats 6 days sick leave gone with a child who is acting perfectly well and no sign of illness beyond a temperature a tiny bit higher than normal. Then lets add in the cough he gets for say 6 weeks added all up for the year due to his asthma, lets just say I keep him home each time that happens for a day or so just in case it's more, so that might be another 4-6 times or more, there goes my sick leave. We haven't even gotten to the ongoing snotty nose that occurs in winter, or the other random illnesses, oh look there goes my job and where I live there are limited employment prospects.
Now if it was the situation of the gym I would not go, it would not be something my family depended on me to do to keep us surviving.
Now if I were a SAHM yes my responses might be different, if my family didn't so heavily rely on an income from me my answers might be different, if I had family or friends locally who could help out, yes my answers may be different, but none of those are my circumstances and my answers reflect what is reality for me

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"Potter75" wrote:

Oh, yeah, I just kindov threw that out there. I mean, there are examples of it concretely in this thread alone ~ the idea that germs are made for sharing ~ after all, its good for the immunity of others and we ought be grateful for it!

I'm not personally saying this is the reason to send kids out sick. I do think its a side effect. Its just the way immunity works. And i think people were saying "i don't mind that my kids could get exposed" i don't think they are saying "I purposely send my kids out there to help the immunity of other kids and other families" I think bottom line is that people can't put their lives on hold for the entire duration of every cold of every family member. Maybe some people are displeased with the fact that they are exposed to a child that 'first day back'...but inevitably some people will have to be.

That is what I disagree with. Don't make that decision for me and mine, thanks.

Really they aren't trying to make any decisions for you, they are just trying to get back to their regular routines.

I've seen kids with bright red cheeks crying for their mom. Shiny eyes, you know ~ kids who LOOK sick. I brought my kids sick to a preschool Christmas program once ~ will never forgive myself. THey felt awful and I felt TERRIBLE. It was so selfish of me, I just tried to talk myself into them being okay, because I selfishly wANTED to see their program! I've seen kids who have thrown up at our gym, or at preschool, kids who I saw LOOK terrible when I dropped off my kids. That is selfish. The kids don't feel well, whatever the color of their snot, and it isn't good parenting to make them go out, and it isn't kind to my kids to expose them to whatever those kids obviously actively have. It reminds me of the article where the Mom admitted to dosing her feverish kid for the sole purpose of getting her admitted to school for just long enough for the tylenol to wear off and the school nurse to send her home. Yes, selfish. Snot or no. THat child should be home, for that poor childs sake, and for my childs sake.

I think we are talking about two different things here. You are talking about parents who have brought their kids out when they don't feel good and want to be home. I am talking about kids who are starting to feel better but still show symptoms and other parents getting wigged out about the symptoms. If the concern is parents deciding to push their kids to do thing when they don't feel well enough to do, then i agree with you for the most part. If the concern is parents bringing kids who are feeling well enough to be out but are still contagious and might spread it to other people, then i don't agree, for the reasons stated in my last post.

Re: the bold, I say for the most part above because i think its somewhat situational. I think sometimes you have to do some things when your kids don't feel 100%. So if you see a kid at the grocery store who looks miserable to be there, maybe mom had to get a few things for dinner, or heck maybe she needed to get tampons. Going to the gym and dropping the kid off at the childcare room, not so much.

Yes yes, we all know that every mother "knows their own child best" and every mother is practically a dr able to discern whether the child ate something which disagreed with them or if it is a stomach virus

Well i think we are forced to have to do this. Nathalie told me yesterday her stomach hurt. She was supposed to go to religious ed after school. But since the other kids have had the stomach bug as of late, i decided not to bring her. Well lo and behold she came home and was fine. Fine all evening. About a half hour of sitting still on the couch drawing, she then got tired of sitting still and went about her business. She just didn't want to go to religious ed. IMO. She was fine all night, ate a good dinner, played. This morning, during breakfast she told me again she didn't feel good. Well...i sent her to school. She seemed fine. Could i be wrong? Sure i could, she hasn't come down with the barf bug that the other kids have had yet. But I can't keep her home every time she says she doesn't feel good if i suspect she's ok. Its a risk though and she might be that kid later who looks miserable barfing at school.

............but if hospitals and schools ask us to wait 24 hours......might there be a valid reason? I tend to think so, is all.

Actually i think the reasoning behind it at schools is 'well we have to do something'..and thats about it. I think it keeps contagious people home for a 24 hour stretch of a much longer contagious period...and hopefully, it nicely coincides with one of those 2 or 3 most highly contagious days. Could any of us honestly say we see it keeping kids from getting sick at school? hardly. And there are no rules about colds if you dont' have a fever anyway. Then its just up to the parents to decide if they want to keep their kids home for their own child's sake.

It just isn't all that big a hardship, generally. Its 24 hours, not days, you know?

Well thats not universally true. 24 hours is a decent hardship if you have to take time off from work. I have 6 sick days a year. I would breeze through my sick time in less than a month if i was highly conservative about when we keep the kids home. If I have to choose to keep my kids home for longer than the minimum rules, i have to consider it very carefully each and every time. Actually, i'm defending something i wasn't even really supporting in the beginning. I never said you shouldn't follow the school rules, or not keep your kids home when they don't feel good. I'm arguing against this notion that I need to keep my kids home when I have determined they are feeling well enough to go out due to some responsibility to try to stop the spread of germs. Or due to some other alarmed parents misconceptions about when colds are contagious and when they aren't.

mom3girls's picture
Joined: 01/09/07
Posts: 1537

Kim, I agree that if they are feeling better then send them. I have some students that will have coughs for a couple of weeks, and missing that much would be crazy.

I have also witnessed moms at places like the grocery store with kids that are obviously sick, but if they mom has no food at the house and no one to watch a sick kid what else can she do?

ClairesMommy's picture
Joined: 08/15/06
Posts: 2299

It is hard having a kid with asthma that it triggered by viruses. Ben gets sick a lot in the winter and stays sick longer than most kids. It's just because his airways get so inflamed that even when the cold virus is long gone he's still coughing a lot. I get looks from other people once in a while but pulling out the puffer tends to ward off any comments about taking my 'sick' kid out ;). Before he had his adenoid out 2 years ago his nose would literally pour with snot all.day.long. It was all that allergic rhinitis. He didn't have a cold but man, he sure looked like he did. We would go through a box of tissue every couple days. People, esp relatives, used to comment about that all the time. I got so tired of explaining that it wasn't a cold.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

"KimPossible" wrote:

I'm not personally saying this is the reason to send kids out sick. I do think its a side effect. Its just the way immunity works. And i think people were saying "i don't mind that my kids could get exposed" i don't think they are saying "I purposely send my kids out there to help the immunity of other kids and other families" I think bottom line is that people can't put their lives on hold for the entire duration of every cold of every family member. Maybe some people are displeased with the fact that they are exposed to a child that 'first day back'...but inevitably some people will have to be.

Really they aren't trying to make any decisions for you, they are just trying to get back to their regular routines.

I think we are talking about two different things here. You are talking about parents who have brought their kids out when they don't feel good and want to be home. I am talking about kids who are starting to feel better but still show symptoms and other parents getting wigged out about the symptoms. If the concern is parents deciding to push their kids to do thing when they don't feel well enough to do, then i agree with you for the most part. If the concern is parents bringing kids who are feeling well enough to be out but are still contagious and might spread it to other people, then i don't agree, for the reasons stated in my last post.

Re: the bold, I say for the most part above because i think its somewhat situational. I think sometimes you have to do some things when your kids don't feel 100%. So if you see a kid at the grocery store who looks miserable to be there, maybe mom had to get a few things for dinner, or heck maybe she needed to get tampons. Going to the gym and dropping the kid off at the childcare room, not so much.

Well i think we are forced to have to do this. Nathalie told me yesterday her stomach hurt. She was supposed to go to religious ed after school. But since the other kids have had the stomach bug as of late, i decided not to bring her. Well lo and behold she came home and was fine. Fine all evening. About a half hour of sitting still on the couch drawing, she then got tired of sitting still and went about her business. She just didn't want to go to religious ed. IMO. She was fine all night, ate a good dinner, played. This morning, during breakfast she told me again she didn't feel good. Well...i sent her to school. She seemed fine. Could i be wrong? Sure i could, she hasn't come down with the barf bug that the other kids have had yet. But I can't keep her home every time she says she doesn't feel good if i suspect she's ok. Its a risk though and she might be that kid later who looks miserable barfing at school.

Actually i think the reasoning behind it at schools is 'well we have to do something'..and thats about it. I think it keeps contagious people home for a 24 hour stretch of a much longer contagious period...and hopefully, it nicely coincides with one of those 2 or 3 most highly contagious days. Could any of us honestly say we see it keeping kids from getting sick at school? hardly. And there are no rules about colds if you dont' have a fever anyway. Then its just up to the parents to decide if they want to keep their kids home for their own child's sake.

Well thats not universally true. 24 hours is a decent hardship if you have to take time off from work. I have 6 sick days a year. I would breeze through my sick time in less than a month if i was highly conservative about when we keep the kids home. If I have to choose to keep my kids home for longer than the minimum rules, i have to consider it very carefully each and every time. Actually, i'm defending something i wasn't even really supporting in the beginning. I never said you shouldn't follow the school rules, or not keep your kids home when they don't feel good. I'm arguing against this notion that I need to keep my kids home when I have determined they are feeling well enough to go out due to some responsibility to try to stop the spread of germs. Or due to some other alarmed parents misconceptions about when colds are contagious and when they aren't.

Don't worry, I'm not "wigged out" about it, and I don't consider myself alarmed or to have misconceptions. It's easy to tell when a child is ill and shouldn't be out. And yes, having 5 children I'm sure that you would go through 6 sick days quickly. None of that changes my opinion that it is unkind to both a child and to other children and parents to take out unwell children. If a mother needs tampons presumably she has a husband.....or yes, I guess a single mother with a sick child may have them out if she had no tampons or pads and had her period.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

"mom3girls" wrote:

Kim, I agree that if they are feeling better then send them. I have some students that will have coughs for a couple of weeks, and missing that much would be crazy.

I have also witnessed moms at places like the grocery store with kids that are obviously sick, but if they mom has no food at the house and no one to watch a sick kid what else can she do?

Do you guys really have days where you have no food in your homes? That is so foreign to me. I mean, we could probably live for a month off of our pantry and freezers. A month of maybe some weird repetition or food combos, granted, but yeah, at least a month. I can't imagine cutting my families food sources so close that an illness could literally leave us foodless. Don't you guys worry at all about any sort of crisis or power outage or storm or anything?

I know for us, three local major chains (Acme, Safeway, and Giant) all have grocery delivery services). We also have drive through stores (Swiss farms) ~ a parent could put their sick child in the car and get some staples if need be without dragging an ill child around a grocery store. We also have delivery take out options out the wazoo. I also have a husband, he is good at getting food from stores. My Mom, or girlfriends grocery shopped for me when I broke my hip or when Jake was sick this winter.

I guess I just think that she could do lots. I've never had a child throw up in public, or taken out kids with a fever, because of options.

I feel like we just did this one, though, so I'll leave it alone. I honestly don't but the "oh woe is me there are no options and we have NOOOOO food". If that is truly the case, its poor planning big time.

mom3girls's picture
Joined: 01/09/07
Posts: 1537

We dont ever have a time where we have no food in the house. Dh is a little obsessive about food for at least 2 weeks, and we have half a pig and half a cow in the freezer. Plus if my kids are sick DH could go to the store, or my mom or sister have gone to get me things if Dh was at work. But I have an awesome support system so it is pretty easy for me to say that I would never have to take a sick kid somewhere. We do not have any stores that deliver anywhere here, actually didnt think that was common at all anymore? Even with great planning it could fail when you have a sick kid and no support system

I didnt have a kid get sick in public until #4 was about 2 years old. He gave no indication of being sick, no one else was sick, but we ran into the cellular store to get a new blue tooth for DH. He was fine, standing there holding my hand, all the sudden he puked ALL over the store. It was pretty horrible. He still talks about it every time we pass the store.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

"Potter75" wrote:

Do you guys really have days where you have no food in your homes? That is so foreign to me. I mean, we could probably live for a month off of our pantry and freezers. A month of maybe some weird repetition or food combos, granted, but yeah, at least a month. I can't imagine cutting my families food sources so close that an illness could literally leave us foodless. Don't you guys worry at all about any sort of crisis or power outage or storm or anything?

I know for us, three local major chains (Acme, Safeway, and Giant) all have grocery delivery services). We also have drive through stores (Swiss farms) ~ a parent could put their sick child in the car and get some staples if need be without dragging an ill child around a grocery store. We also have delivery take out options out the wazoo. I also have a husband, he is good at getting food from stores. My Mom, or girlfriends grocery shopped for me when I broke my hip or when Jake was sick this winter.

I guess I just think that she could do lots. I've never had a child throw up in public, or taken out kids with a fever, because of options.

I feel like we just did this one, though, so I'll leave it alone. I honestly don't but the "oh woe is me there are no options and we have NOOOOO food". If that is truly the case, its poor planning big time.

Just to clarify, you have never taken a sick child into a store? What do you do one your way home from the doctor and you need to pick up the RX?, or when you are home alone with the kids and they really need some kind of medicine?

ETA - There are no stores anywhere near here that would deliver groceries, and not all people have family close by.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

Just to clarify, you have never taken a sick child into a store? What do you do one your way home from the doctor and you need to pick up the RX?, or when you are home alone with the kids and they really need some kind of medicine?

Never. Ever. Our ped emails the Rx directly to CVS. It's a mile from our home. By the time I get there and go through the drive through window our medication is ready. We keep plenty of Tylenol or Advil on hand, and don't use pedialyte stomach meds vitamins or allergy medication. It's not that hard.

Im shocked no stores in your area offer grocery delivery and its so common here. It was a life saver to me for a while when my first two were so young and we had two really bad winters back to back and dh was traveling all the time. Delivery was always free with some finagling.

ange84's picture
Joined: 12/28/09
Posts: 6564

We have stores that offer grocery delivery, but not everyday and it costs a fair bit. We also don't have drive through pharmacies, there is one that does home delivery but I don't use that pharmacy as they are more expensive. So yeah sometimes going to the shops with an unwell child is unavoidable. I had to take DS one day when he was off because it was grocery day and yes we had food, but he had been off food a little so I wanted some soup for him which I do not keep in the pantry usually, and we needed milk and bread. Of course he went from just feeling a bit warm and quiet to throwing up in the few minutes in the store, no time before or after that.

These days so many people live away from family so those networks to help them are limited. Yes friends can sometimes help out, but there are times when they can't and in my case I have few friends locally and none who I am close enough to to call on to do a grocery run or anything like that. I guess this a debate where peoples answers are informed by their own circumstances

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

I am very sure there are no grocery stores that deliver here or where my parents live in NY.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"Potter75" wrote:

Don't worry, I'm not "wigged out" about it, and I don't consider myself alarmed or to have misconceptions. It's easy to tell when a child is ill and shouldn't be out. And yes, having 5 children I'm sure that you would go through 6 sick days quickly. None of that changes my opinion that it is unkind to both a child and to other children and parents to take out unwell children. If a mother needs tampons presumably she has a husband.....or yes, I guess a single mother with a sick child may have them out if she had no tampons or pads and had her period.

I didn't mean you specifically get wigged out. I am stating in general that i disagree with parents who think others should keep kids home for the sole reason that their own don't get sick if the parent has decided the child feels well enough to be out. I would consider a parent who does this because a child has green boogers and a gross cough to be wigging out, acting irrational.

I just threw out the tampons example not because it would be universally true for everyone, but just to give an example. I'm really surprised you can't fathom any reason why a parent would have to take a child with them somewhere when they dont' feel good. Is that really that incomprehensible?

As for food in the house, this generally doesn't happen to us but we do get low on meal type stuff sometimes, its just that since there are two of us we don't often need to consider bringing sick kids with us. We do let food get pretty low in general before we do a big shop again, for various reasons. I hate it when things go unused in cupboards or in the fridge because new food comes in, this helps prevent that. Sometimes its simply time constraints, we may go the extra two days without going shopping when we really could have just because of other things going on. I also dont' worry about power outages. I've lived in the northeast my entire life and never had experienced a debilitating snow storm that could theoretically cause starvation and make food completely unreachable for a long period of time. And osmething like Sandy...plenty of warning ahead of time to prepare. And of course i could find something to eat in the house, but i guess i don't feel like the situation is quite as dire as you do. If I had to, i would bring my kid for the 20 minute trip so that i could make a proper meal for everyone...ideal? no...end of the world, definitely not..not even close if they have been able to rest for the majority of the day and are generally being tended to and getting plenty of rest.

I mean unless we are talking like crazy severe here, like barfing...or can barely stay awake with a really high fever. Then the rest of us would have cereal for dinner if need be.

We don't have grocery stores here that deliver...i'm guessing there are probably about 2 cities in this entire state that might possibly have any sort of grocery delivery and even then i could easily see them not having it either.

SID081108's picture
Joined: 06/03/09
Posts: 1348

"KimPossible" wrote:

We don't have grocery stores here that deliver...i'm guessing there are probably about 2 cities in this entire state that might possibly have any sort of grocery delivery and even then i could easily see them not having it either.

In the booming metropolis of Houston there is only one small specialty grocery store that delivers, and it doesn't deliver anywhere near my house, and it's not free. There is an option of using a concierge service to pick up at any story you choose, and it costs between $25 and $95 depending on the number of items they buy for you. No thanks, I'll take my sick kid to the grocery store for 20 minutes if need be.

mom3girls's picture
Joined: 01/09/07
Posts: 1537

I think it is elitist to think that any mom that has to go the grocery store with a sick kid is doing so because of poor planning, sometimes life happens to even the best planner. Sounds like you have it pretty great with drive thru drug stores and grocery delivery. I have it pretty easy too, even without either of those things, but I am well aware that without my support system it wouldnt be so easy.

mommytoMR.FACE's picture
Joined: 04/10/09
Posts: 781

We have grocery delivery here, and grocery pick up. I am lucky because Jace's immune system is pretty awesome most of the time. The last time I had to take him out was when he had strep throat in the middle of a hurricane and I had to beg the pharmacy (after taking him to express care) to fill his abx before they closed due to the storm. I don't believe in chicken pox parties and when he has more than a common cold he stays home with me. I also get pissed off when I see yellow and green snot coming out of noses, and I get even more pissed off when that snot ends up on my kid or his clothing.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

Everyone chooses the community they live in and the support the system they have. Clearly I live in a community with a ton of resources, so you can see why I may not understand why a mother would drag out an obviously sick kid. Why would you when you have a wealth of resources available to you. I feel for you guys who have to take out your poor sick kids. I had no idea that places with so few options were so common Sad

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"mommytoMR.FACE" wrote:

We have grocery delivery here, and grocery pick up. I am lucky because Jace's immune system is pretty awesome most of the time. The last time I had to take him out was when he had strep throat in the middle of a hurricane and I had to beg the pharmacy (after taking him to express care) to fill his abx before they closed due to the storm. I don't believe in chicken pox parties and when he has more than a common cold he stays home with me. I also get pissed off when I see yellow and green snot coming out of noses, and I get even more pissed off when that snot ends up on my kid or his clothing.

Is it your opinion that you can definitively tell that green snot is going to something to your kid that clear snot won't? Because scientifically thats false.

Joined: 08/17/04
Posts: 2226

We have Stop and Shop which does deliver but I'm not sure it does same day. We do not have drive through stores and I honestly don't think they exist in the state ( I have seen them on vacation though). My pharmacy has a drive thru so we typically use that even when they aren't sick.

I'll admit to not bringing my kid out when sick. I feel bad as I hate going anywhere when I am. I will usually ask dh to pick something up or I go out when he comes home. We typically don't run out of food though.

mommytoMR.FACE's picture
Joined: 04/10/09
Posts: 781

"KimPossible" wrote:

Is it your opinion that you can definitively tell that green snot is going to something to your kid that clear snot won't? Because scientifically thats false.

I understand clear snot can just be allergies but can also be a sinus infection or a cold. I'm more grossed out at the yellow and green because it just looks disgusting, lol. Green and yellow is a high concentration of WBC's which = a virus or infection that is being fought off (correct me if I'm wrong). I'll take my chances with clear. I don't like to take chances with yellow and green.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"mommytoMR.FACE" wrote:

I understand clear snot can just be allergies but can also be a sinus infection or a cold. I'm more grossed out at the yellow and green because it just looks disgusting, lol. Green and yellow is a high concentration of WBC's which = a virus or infection that is being fought off (correct me if I'm wrong). I'll take my chances with clear. I don't like to take chances with yellow and green.

So are you of the opinion that people who have kids with clear snot from colds should stay home too until it goes away?

mommytoMR.FACE's picture
Joined: 04/10/09
Posts: 781

"KimPossible" wrote:

So are you of the opinion that people who have kids with clear snot from colds should stay home too until it goes away?

If the child isn't feeling well then definitely yes. But usually the first day or two I'd say they should stay home. The more rest for them the better. And the less chance my kid has catching it Smile

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

I have never had to run out to get food or tampons for the family, but I have gone out to get prescriptions or 'specialty' food for the sick kid. Most of the time DH and I can work it so one person stays home with sicky, but DH isn't always around or available to help. We also dont have any delivery or drive thru stores.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

"mom3girls" wrote:

I think it is elitist to think that any mom that has to go the grocery store with a sick kid is doing so because of poor planning, sometimes life happens to even the best planner. Sounds like you have it pretty great with drive thru drug stores and grocery delivery. I have it pretty easy too, even without either of those things, but I am well aware that without my support system it wouldnt be so easy.

I find this a fascinating use of the word elitist, by the way Smile I would simply not call someone who has no resources (like drive through things or grocery delivery or a husband or family or babysitters) and young children who runs the risk of running out of food or medicine......the best planner. Its an oxymoron. If that logic makes me an elitist.......I accept the title happily.

Joined: 11/28/06
Posts: 848

I'm not a fan of people bringing sick (contagious) kids out to mingle. I just think it is generally a selfish and inconsiderate thing to do. And I get that parents of large families probably run out of sick days very quickly. I can sympathize. I run out of days quickly with my 2 children. But that's one reason why we chose to stop having children. All part of the planning process.....

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"mommytoMR.FACE" wrote:

If the child isn't feeling well then definitely yes. But usually the first day or two I'd say they should stay home. The more rest for them the better. And the less chance my kid has catching it Smile

I think that kids should stay home when they aren't feeling well too. Would you keep them home if they caught a light cold? My kids have caught colds and only gotten mild cases of them and i don't keep them home at all. I would imagine they are still contagious though.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"Potter75" wrote:

Everyone chooses the community they live in and the support the system they have. Clearly I live in a community with a ton of resources, so you can see why I may not understand why a mother would drag out an obviously sick kid. Why would you when you have a wealth of resources available to you. I feel for you guys who have to take out your poor sick kids. I had no idea that places with so few options were so common Sad

Yeah i chose the community i live in for other reasons....it definitely did not come with the perk of having the latest and greatest retail options. Can't have everything i guess.

KimPossible's picture
Joined: 05/24/06
Posts: 3317

"Jessica80" wrote:

I'll admit to not bringing my kid out when sick. I feel bad as I hate going anywhere when I am.

See people say this but do you really not bring them anywhere until they are fully better? I almost don't see how its possible.

Do people really believe that they have a plan in place that prevents their kids from going out in public when they are contagious. I suspect most people do bring their kids out when they are contagious...they just feel better about doing it because the kids don't visually look as bad so its easy to think you are not spreading anything around.

Joined: 08/17/04
Posts: 2226

I mean not bringing them when they are clearly looking sick. Last week, when we picked up the prescription for Corinne, I brought her in because she wanted a coloring book and she felt up to it. I was at the pharmacy and I expect sick people there. We didn't go anywhere from Wed-Sun night. She went to the store with DH on Monday because she felt better and her cough went away.

I will bring them if the main part is over and they feel up to going out. DH is home Mon and Tues and I am home on Sat and Sun. We only have 3 days in the week where one of us could potentially miss work. Grandmothers watch them on Wed-Fri so they will take them with colds. Either one of us stays home for throw up, fevers or other issues (this past week for example)

A few months ago when I thought she had strep (and didn't) we stayed home.

I just don't think it's worth it, if they get run down it could come back and it can be worse because now they are tired. Others could get sick etc. If they have minor colds they do go to school (Elizabeth) and they play with friends (but I advise the parents)

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