Texas Judge Will Not Be Charged For Child Abuse

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Alissa_Sal's picture
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Texas Judge Will Not Be Charged For Child Abuse

http://slatest.slate.com/posts/2011/11/04/william_hillary_adams_beating_video_texas_judge_won_t_face_charges.html?from=rss/&wpisrc=newsletter_slatest

Warning - if you choose to click on the link to the You Tube video, know that it shows a man beating a girl with a belt while yelling at her, cussing her out, et cetera. I found it really horrible to watch and had to turn it off, so I wanted to give you all fair warning.

A Texas judge made infamous this week when his disabled daughter released a 2004 video of him viciously beating her with a belt won't face charges because the statue of limitations has expired, police announced Thursday.

The Associated Press reports that Aransas County Court-at-Law Judge William Adams would have likely been charged with causing injury to a child or other assault-related offenses for the beating of his then-16-year-old daughter, if not for the five-year statue of limitations.

"We believe that there was a criminal offense involved and that there was substantial evidence to indicate that and under normal circumstances ... a charge could have been made," Rockport Police Chief Tim Jayroe said Thursday, adding that officers will discuss the case with federal prosecutors even though it is unlikely that federal charges would apply.

Still, Adams, who presides over child abuse cases as part of his job, may not get off scot-free. The Texas Department of Family and Protective Services – the agency responsible for a portion of his case load – is now investigating him and he’s also the subject of a separate judicial conduct investigation. As fellow Aransas County Judge C.H. Mills Jr. told the AP, "Personally I don't see how he can recover from this."

Adams’s national image problem began last week when his daughter, Hillary Adams, now 23, posted an 8-minute video to YouTube. (Fair warning: the video is rather difficult to watch). In the video, William Adams is shown repeatedly whipping his daughter with a belt despite her sustained pleas for him to stop. According to the video’s description, apparently written by Hillary Adams, the beating was a result of the then 16-year-old downloading music and games illegally from the Internet, and was just one instance of a pattern of physical and emotional abuse targeting both her and her mother, Hallie Adams. Hallie Adams is shown briefly participating in the beating. She and William Adams divorced in 2007.

As of Friday morning, the video had over three-and-a-half million views, with many viewers opting for their own type of Internet vigilante justice.

Both Hillary and William Adams have since talked about the incident to the press. William Adams claims that the video “looks worse than it is,” and released a three-page statement in his defense. As the AP summarizes, he says the video’s release was to “get back at him for telling her he would be reducing the amount of financial support he gives her and taking away her Mercedes.”

On both NBC’s Today show and CNN’s Anderson Cooper 360, Hillary Adams has claimed that she posted the video, in part, to encourage her father to get help. She told Cooper, “I wanted to show my father, 'Hey, I think you were in some denial about the way you are treating me and my mother.'”

ETA: The explanation that Hilary Adams posted on YouTube for why she made this video public is:

[INDENT]

[INDENT]2004: Arkansas County Court-At-Law Judge William Adams took a belt to his own teenage daughter as punishment for using the internet to acquire music and games that were unavailable for legal purchase at the time. She has had ataxic cerebral palsy from birth that led her to a passion for technology, which was strictly forbidden by her father's backwards views. The judge's wife was emotionally abused herself and was severely manipulated into assisting the beating and should not be blamed for any content in this video. The judge's wife has since left the marriage due to the abuse, which continues to this day, and has sincerely apologized and repented for her part and for allowing such a thing, long before this video was even revealed to exist. Judge William Adams is not fit to be anywhere near the law system if he can't even exercise fit judgement as a parent himself. Do not allow this man to ever be re-elected again. His "judgement" is a giant farce. Signed, Hillary Adams, his daughter.[/INDENT]

[/INDENT]Debate Questions:
1. I know that there are some crimes (such as murder) that do not have a statute of limitations. Do you think that it is appropriate that abuse has a statute of limitations (in cases where it can be proved fairly well, such as when it is caught on video tape.)
2. Assuming that the father is absolutely correct, and she is posting this video in retaliation for him taking away her Mercedes....does it matter? Does the timing of the release of the video (7 years after the incident) bother you?
3. I have read comments on line (both in that article but also on You Tube) stating that this was not abuse, and further more, if she had just laid down and let him spank her, it wouldn't have escalated to this point. Do you think that any child/person should be reasonably expected to "just lay down" and take a beating with a belt? If they don't, is it then "their fault" if the beating escalates? And quite simply, do you believe that this was abuse, or simply discipline?

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4103

1. No, he should not be prosecuted. The mother didn't do anything about it, except divorce him, and neither did the daughter. The mother could have given the tape to her divorce attorney who could have had a field day with it in 2007. She didn't. The daughter didn't pursue charges when she could have, either. Quite frankly, I think they held onto the tape until now *because* the statute of limitations would expire and they could humiliate him publicly without him risking a criminal conviction over it.

2. The story I've heard is that the father filed to gain custody of a younger daughter. Concern about the younger sibling is what spurred the release. In that case, I think it was proper & justified. Either way, I don't really care, I'm glad it's out. This man doesn't deserve children, and he doesn't deserve to be sitting in judgement of others.

3. This is absolutely abuse. Anyone who says otherwise is probably abusing their own kids in the same way & trying to justify it & rationalize it away with the excuse that this judge does it, too. I'm completely against spanking in the first place, but beating someone with a belt is far beyond spanking. And on a 16yo? :eek: She's not a little kid, she's practically an adult. Would beat your neighbor with a belt if he stole your tools? No. So don't beat your kid for the same thing.

wlillie's picture
Joined: 09/17/07
Posts: 1796

I didn't watch the video, but I agree with Stacey (but we spank).

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

I should not have watched the video. It will be hard to get that image out of my mind. While I do believe in spanking, I feel that it can only be done in a loving way. What was on the video was not done in love. Not done with the goal in mine to improve your child. In my opinion, telling your child that you are f****** worthless is verbal abuse. Threatening to beat your face is not loving discipline. A few taps on the bottom that are not hard enough to leave a bruise is a world of difference to what happened on that video.

That said, I am not sure what the point is in sending him to jail after the child is grown up. And the girl had an ax to grind in the first place and did deserve some kind of punishment. I just do not believe that was the best punishment for her.

culturedmom's picture
Joined: 09/30/06
Posts: 1131

That made me sick, but so would any video of a parent hitting a child. I think it is gross, wrong, and neither of those parents should be allowed to have children. Also, the idea that the child should have pressed charges is crazy. What child, even one being abused would speak out against their parents. There should be no statute of limitations.

I hope watching this makes parents think a little more about how they discipline. And the fact that he tries to excuse it is crazy. If you would not want your discipline style being video taped or do it in front of strangers, then in my book it is not a good form of discipline.

culturedmom's picture
Joined: 09/30/06
Posts: 1131

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I should not have watched the video. It will be hard to get that image out of my mind. While I do believe in spanking, I feel that it can only be done in a loving way. What was on the video was not done in love. Not done with the goal in mine to improve your child. In my opinion, telling your child that you are f****** worthless is verbal abuse. Threatening to beat your face is not loving discipline. A few taps on the bottom that are not hard enough to leave a bruise is a world of difference to what happened on that video.

That said, I am not sure what the point is in sending him to jail after the child is grown up. And the girl had an ax to grind in the first place and did deserve some kind of punishment. I just do not believe that was the best punishment for her.

Can you explain the bolded to me? I never understood the "I hit you because I love you" idea. How can you hit someone with love?

hopin2bpreggermeggers's picture
Joined: 02/22/10
Posts: 567

"culturedmom" wrote:

Can you explain the bolded to me? I never understood the "I hit you because I love you" idea. How can you hit someone with love?

I was spanked as a kid, even with a belt occasionally when the offense was especially severe. My parents never did it in a savage way and, after doing it, would sit me down, explain why they felt it was necessary, and reminded me that they loved me no matter what I did. Heck, there was probably only once or twice they really lost their temper (never in this kind of manner though) when it probably should have been a lot more. They were very good about "fitting the punishment to the crime."

That being said, I never thought it was child abuse and have never blamed them for it. Lord, looking back at what I put them through at times, they are saints. The way they handled discipline was clearly "out of love." It was never too hard, but hard enough to say - "hey, that what was wrong." In fact, I think it hurt them more than it hurt me, but it got the point across.

There is truly a difference between spanking and beating.

Joined: 06/04/07
Posts: 1368

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

http://slatest.slate.com/posts/2011/11/04/william_hillary_adams_beating_video_texas_judge_won_t_face_charges.html?from=rss/&wpisrc=newsletter_slatest

Warning - if you choose to click on the link to the You Tube video, know that it shows a man beating a girl with a belt while yelling at her, cussing her out, et cetera. I found it really horrible to watch and had to turn it off, so I wanted to give you all fair warning.

ETA: The explanation that Hilary Adams posted on YouTube for why she made this video public is:
Debate Questions:
1. I know that there are some crimes (such as murder) that do not have a statute of limitations. Do you think that it is appropriate that abuse has a statute of limitations (in cases where it can be proved fairly well, such as when it is caught on video tape.)
2. Assuming that the father is absolutely correct, and she is posting this video in retaliation for him taking away her Mercedes....does it matter? Does the timing of the release of the video (7 years after the incident) bother you?
3. I have read comments on line (both in that article but also on You Tube) stating that this was not abuse, and further more, if she had just laid down and let him spank her, it wouldn't have escalated to this point. Do you think that any child/person should be reasonably expected to "just lay down" and take a beating with a belt? If they don't, is it then "their fault" if the beating escalates? And quite simply, do you believe that this was abuse, or simply discipline?

1. No, she intentionally waited seven years. I think the statute of limitations is just for criminal charges as it should've been addressed within those timelines.

2. ""I waited seven years because back then I was still a minor and living under his roof and releasing it then, I don't know what would've happened to me and my mother and my little sister," said Adams, who suffers from cerebral palsy. "So waiting until today, seven years later, was about me being able to pull away and distance myself from the consequences."

With her mother by her side, Adams told “Today’s” Matt Lauer that she hoped her father, Judge William Adams, wouldn't lose his job as a result.

“I think [my father] has been punished enough just by seeing this go public like this, and I think he just really needs help and rehabilitation," Adams said.
[LEFT]
Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/hillary-adams-uploaded-video-showing-texas-judge-father-beating-tells-story-today-show-article-1.971828#ixzz1clY0cZGU
[/LEFT]

I am not bothered at all that she waited the seven years. It completely fits the dynamics of domestic abuse. They would rather they get the help they need than to just punish them for their actions. If he's been in denial that there's a problem, which it appears he still is when he says it's not as bad as it looks, it makes sense why she would give a reality check knowing there would be no criminal charges while seeing the irony of his situation and the cases he presides over. I hope he loses his job. His credibility is completely stripped.

3. Absolutely no child should just lie down and take a beating with a belt. This is child abuse in all aspects of the word. Even spanking a 16 year old with only an open hand seems wrong.
[LEFT]
[/LEFT]

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4103

"hopin2bpreggermeggers" wrote:

I was spanked as a kid, even with a belt occasionally when the offense was especially severe. My parents never did it in a savage way and, after doing it, would sit me down, explain why they felt it was necessary, and reminded me that they loved me no matter what I did. Heck, there was probably only once or twice they really lost their temper (never in this kind of manner though) when it probably should have been a lot more. They were very good about "fitting the punishment to the crime."

That being said, I never thought it was child abuse and have never blamed them for it. Lord, looking back at what I put them through at times, they are saints. The way they handled discipline was clearly "out of love." It was never too hard, but hard enough to say - "hey, that what was wrong." In fact, I think it hurt them more than it hurt me, but it got the point across.

There is truly a difference between spanking and beating.

I could never love anyone who hit me, let alone beat me with a belt. :eek: Not even a parent. My mom encouraged my first stepdad to spank me once over something, I never forgave either of them for it. You do NOT hit the people you love EVER. What a horrible message to send to your child. Sad

Joined: 12/10/05
Posts: 1681

1. I agree with the previous posters that the statute of limitations should stand in this instance. There was plenty of time between now and then that she (or her mother) could have come forward with this evidence.

2. Did she do it in retaliation over her car? Maybe. Since she waited so incredibly long, I do have a hard time believing she did it with absolutely no other motives besides doing the right thing. At the end of the day though, it doesn't matter. What he did was totally wrong and while he likely won't be charged, I'm sure he will pay career wise, which is fair.

3. I haven't watched the video so I'm going off the description of what happened in the article, but it sounds pretty abusive to me. First, there is a huge difference between "spanking" and "beating". A spank is one to two swats on the bottom, not chasing someone around with a belt. Second, 16 is WAY too old for spanking. Third, the whole just "take it" thing. No, no one should just allow themselves to be beaten. That said, my kids know, if they run away when I've asked them to come over and get a spanking they will probably get an extra one. I don't chase them around like a lunatic. It is about obedience, but I also don't beat the crap out of them with a belt. If someone did that, hell yes, they should run away and fight back. I certainly would.

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

1. I know that there are some crimes (such as murder) that do not have a statute of limitations. Do you think that it is appropriate that abuse has a statute of limitations (in cases where it can be proved, such as when it is caught on video tape.)
I do not believe that there should be a statute of limitations on serious physical crimes such as murder, rape, and abuse, if they can be reasonably proved. I think that the point of prosecuting a father that beat his daughter 7 years ago is two-fold - first, in case there are other children or adults in the house that may still be in danger, and second, in the hopes of rehabilitating him by getting him the help that he seems to need in controlling and dealing with his anger in a nonviolent way.

2. Assuming that the father is absolutely correct, and she is posting this video in retaliation for him taking away her Mercedes....does it matter? Does the timing of the release of the video (7 years after the incident) bother you?
I don't care if she released it because he wouldn't pay for her pedicure - that is still him in that tape. He did the abusing, and no matter why she finally decided to come forward, he needs to deal with the consequences of his actions.

3. I have read comments on line (both in that article but also on You Tube) stating that this was not abuse, and further more, if she had just laid down and let him spank her, it wouldn't have escalated to this point. Do you think that any child/person should be reasonably expected to "just lay down" and take a beating with a belt? If they don't, is it then "their fault" if the beating escalates? And quite simply, do you believe that this was abuse, or simply discipline?
Definitely abuse. And actually, I think that the outliers like this actually kind of cement my decision not to ever spank my children. I do realize that there is a world of difference between spanking a child and beating them with a belt, but I guess my gut reaction is that when you have to sit around and try to decide how hard is too hard, and what you can hit them with, it just seems like the wrong way to go about it. In regards to this particular case, I don't think that any person (or for that matter, animal!) should be expected to hold still and take a beating like that. The idea that anyone would *expect* her to just lay there and take it actually makes me feel more sick than the actual beating. Just the idea that some people would expect anyone to be that....powerless and helpless....that they literally shouldn't even protest or try to protect themselves from being beaten...it just turns my stomach.

"Spacers" wrote:

1. No, he should not be prosecuted. The mother didn't do anything about it, except divorce him, and neither did the daughter. The mother could have given the tape to her divorce attorney who could have had a field day with it in 2007. She didn't. The daughter didn't pursue charges when she could have, either. Quite frankly, I think they held onto the tape until now *because* the statute of limitations would expire and they could humiliate him publicly without him risking a criminal conviction over it.

I guess I'm not exactly sure why what the mother did or did not do should matter (except that maybe she should be charged for standing by and letting this happen to her daughter.) I also don't know why it matters that the daughter didn't do anything at the time either - first of all, she was a minor, probably very frightened of her parents and frightened to speak up. But second of all, at least in CO, the victim of an assault doesn't have to "press charges" any more - the state presses charges regardless because there were too many domestic abuse situations where the perpetraters were getting off scott free because human relationships can be humongously complicated and effed up. I agree with that - it seems to me that breaking the law is still breaking the law, whether the victim ultimately decides to press charges or not.

Spacers's picture
Joined: 12/29/03
Posts: 4103

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

I guess I'm not exactly sure why what the mother did or did not do should matter (except that maybe she should be charged for standing by and letting this happen to her daughter.) I also don't know why it matters that the daughter didn't do anything at the time either - first of all, she was a minor, probably very frightened of her parents and frightened to speak up. But second of all, at least in CO, the victim of an assault doesn't have to "press charges" any more - the state presses charges regardless because there were too many domestic abuse situations where the perpetraters were getting off scott free because human relationships can be humongously complicated and effed up. I agree with that - it seems to me that breaking the law is still breaking the law, whether the victim ultimately decides to press charges or not.

The district attorney has to be aware of a crime in order to prosecute it. That's one of the reasons for statutes of limitations, it gets harder to investigate & prosecute a crime the longer it's been. Both the mother & daughter were aware of the incident & chose to not tell anyone. I don't really care why they didn't, but they didn't. So he gets off scot-free? Too bad, if you're the victim of a crime, you need to let people know about it. Schools & doctors' offices are mandated reporters now, even a little slip about her butt being too sore to sit down in class should have prompted an investigation. Back when my dad was beating the **** out of my sister, no one outside the family or police *could* do anything, and as a young child I didn't even know you could call the cops or where to find a phone number. Now even preschoolers know how to dial 911. No excuses.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6568

"culturedmom" wrote:

Can you explain the bolded to me? I never understood the "I hit you because I love you" idea. How can you hit someone with love?

I am not sure this is something I want to debate. Every one has their own opinion of what is a right way and a wrong way to discipline. What this article is about is weather or not it is abuse in the you tube video and weather or not it is to late to prosecute. I do believe that it is clear that yes, that is obviously beyond spanking and into abuse. What I am not sure that I can handle is the posts that are bound to come that say any one who spanks their child is abusing their child. Putting anyone who does spank in the same category as with monsters like in this video.

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

"Spacers" wrote:

The district attorney has to be aware of a crime in order to prosecute it. That's one of the reasons for statutes of limitations, it gets harder to investigate & prosecute a crime the longer it's been. Both the mother & daughter were aware of the incident & chose to not tell anyone. I don't really care why they didn't, but they didn't. So he gets off scot-free? Too bad, if you're the victim of a crime, you need to let people know about it. Schools & doctors' offices are mandated reporters now, even a little slip about her butt being too sore to sit down in class should have prompted an investigation. Back when my dad was beating the **** out of my sister, no one outside the family or police *could* do anything, and as a young child I didn't even know you could call the cops or where to find a phone number. Now even preschoolers know how to dial 911. No excuses.

Wow. No excuses for a teen living under her abusive parents' roof and probably being scared of what they would do to her or what would happen to her if her parents *did* go to jail, also probably having been raised to feel powerless against this kind of stuff, and also probably still loving her parents even though they beat her because they are her parents? Harsh.

I agree that in most cases it would be too hard to prove abuse years and years after the fact. Unless, you know, you had it on tape or something.

culturedmom's picture
Joined: 09/30/06
Posts: 1131

"AlyssaEimers" wrote:

I am not sure this is something I want to debate. Every one has their own opinion of what is a right way and a wrong way to discipline. What this article is about is weather or not it is abuse in the you tube video and weather or not it is to late to prosecute. I do believe that it is clear that yes, that is obviously beyond spanking and into abuse. What I am not sure that I can handle is the posts that are bound to come that say any one who spanks their child is abusing their child. Putting anyone who does spank in the same category as with monsters like in this video.

You have the right not to debate this or answer my questions. I purposly try not to put personal information in posts because my real life is not up for debate. However, you brought it up so I assumed (and according to the rules of the debate board) that it was up to debate. And according to the law spanking is not abuse and I can concede that there are many levels of aggressive acts. A slap is different from a punch is different from beating with an object. However, if someone did any of those to an adult, they woudl all be considered violent acts and against the law.

To me, I would be just as saddened and angry if it was a video of her father hitting her with his hand and saying 'I'm doing this for your own good".

Joined: 06/04/07
Posts: 1368

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

1. I know that there are some crimes (such as murder) that do not have a statute of limitations. Do you think that it is appropriate that abuse has a statute of limitations (in cases where it can be proved, such as when it is caught on video tape.)
I do not believe that there should be a statute of limitations on serious physical crimes such as murder, rape, and abuse, if they can be reasonably proved. I think that the point of prosecuting a father that beat his daughter 7 years ago is two-fold - first, in case there are other children or adults in the house that may still be in danger, and second, in the hopes of rehabilitating him by getting him the help that he seems to need in controlling and dealing with his anger in a nonviolent way.

2. Assuming that the father is absolutely correct, and she is posting this video in retaliation for him taking away her Mercedes....does it matter? Does the timing of the release of the video (7 years after the incident) bother you?
I don't care if she released it because he wouldn't pay for her pedicure - that is still him in that tape. He did the abusing, and no matter why she finally decided to come forward, he needs to deal with the consequences of his actions.

3. I have read comments on line (both in that article but also on You Tube) stating that this was not abuse, and further more, if she had just laid down and let him spank her, it wouldn't have escalated to this point. Do you think that any child/person should be reasonably expected to "just lay down" and take a beating with a belt? If they don't, is it then "their fault" if the beating escalates? And quite simply, do you believe that this was abuse, or simply discipline?
Definitely abuse. And actually, I think that the outliers like this actually kind of cement my decision not to ever spank my children. I do realize that there is a world of difference between spanking a child and beating them with a belt, but I guess my gut reaction is that when you have to sit around and try to decide how hard is too hard, and what you can hit them with, it just seems like the wrong way to go about it. In regards to this particular case, I don't think that any person (or for that matter, animal!) should be expected to hold still and take a beating like that. The idea that anyone would *expect* her to just lay there and take it actually makes me feel more sick than the actual beating. Just the idea that some people would expect anyone to be that....powerless and helpless....that they literally shouldn't even protest or try to protect themselves from being beaten...it just turns my stomach.

I guess I'm not exactly sure why what the mother did or did not do should matter (except that maybe she should be charged for standing by and letting this happen to her daughter.) I also don't know why it matters that the daughter didn't do anything at the time either - first of all, she was a minor, probably very frightened of her parents and frightened to speak up. But second of all, at least in CO, the victim of an assault doesn't have to "press charges" any more - the state presses charges regardless because there were too many domestic abuse situations where the perpetraters were getting off scott free because human relationships can be humongously complicated and effed up. I agree with that - it seems to me that breaking the law is still breaking the law, whether the victim ultimately decides to press charges or not.

They even used to have additional charges in our state if a child witnessed the abuse. That has since been repealed as the Coalition for Battered Women testified that it actually made it worse for the victim if charges are pressed against the abuser and only in extreme cases do they prosecute without permission. Most of the time in our state, OFP's are what is ordered and then to charge criminally if they break the OFP. I'm not sure I completely agree with their rationale having dealt with this issue firsthand. I find it very degrading to know that domestic abuse is not normally treated as regular assault cases and don't have the same punishments for hurting a family member as they do for hurting a stranger, as if one is more acceptable than the other or one has less rights than the other.

Here's a link for what each state's laws are for children who witness abuse:
http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/statutes/witnessdvall.pdf

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

What's an OFP?

culturedmom's picture
Joined: 09/30/06
Posts: 1131

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

Wow. No excuses for a teen living under her abusive parents' roof and probably being scared of what they would do to her or what would happen to her if her parents *did* go to jail, also probably having been raised to feel powerless against this kind of stuff, and also probably still loving her parents even though they beat her because they are her parents? Harsh.

I agree that in most cases it would be too hard to prove abuse years and years after the fact. Unless, you know, you had it on tape or something.

Exactly. If there is no statute of limitations for sexual crimes why should there be for violent crimes, just because it is your parents?

Joined: 06/04/07
Posts: 1368

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

What's an OFP?

Order for Protection.

Joined: 03/14/09
Posts: 624

I don't understand the statute of limitations, at all.

fuchsiasky's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 955

I don't think there should be a statue of limitations for violent crime. If you have harmed someone that doesn't change after a set number of years. And there are a myriad of reason to wait to report abuse. I don't care why she posted the video. It is proof of abuse and I think that her father needs to answer for it legally. I also think that he is should be removed from a position of deciding any abuse cases. He cannot be impartial.

RebeccaA'07's picture
Joined: 11/19/07
Posts: 1628

"culturedmom" wrote:

That made me sick, but so would any video of a parent hitting a child. I think it is gross, wrong, and neither of those parents should be allowed to have children. Also, the idea that the child should have pressed charges is crazy. What child, even one being abused would speak out against their parents. There should be no statute of limitations.

I hope watching this makes parents think a little more about how they discipline. And the fact that he tries to excuse it is crazy. If you would not want your discipline style being video taped or do it in front of strangers, then in my book it is not a good form of discipline.

I agree 100% to every point made.

culturedmom's picture
Joined: 09/30/06
Posts: 1131

"blather" wrote:

I don't understand the statute of limitations, at all.

I would guess that probably sicne it was common for kids to get beat as a form of discipline, they don't want tons of adults coming into the court system charging their parents?

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

"blather" wrote:

I don't understand the statute of limitations, at all.

I wonder if it doesnt have something to do with overtaxing the system. In this case it is pretty obvious that he abused her, but in many cases there is little proof after the bruises fade, let alone years later. And if our judicial system believes in rehabilitation, then perhaps the thought is that if there hasnt been a more recent offense, the offender doesn't need the rehabilitation and they just dont have the manpower to try to find proof anyways.

I realize this wouldnt apply to this case because there is a video, but I dont think we can have a statute of limitations and then say it doesnt count if the victim can provide their own proof. It shouldnt be up to them to do so, especially in the case of abuse.

Starryblue702's picture
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454

1. I don't think that any crime should have a statute of limitations.

2. I don't care why she posted the video or why it took so long, there's no denying what's on it, and it's abuse. I don't believe in belts, ever. I believe in spanking, but even that with limits (only the butt, or a smack on the leg or hand), and every time after I do that (which is not often) I go and hold them, tell them why I did that, and that I love them no matter what. This is exactly the way my parents disciplined me and I thank them for it. I think the lack of discipline with our children has led to the decline in adolescent/teen behavior, and them thinking that they can back-sass everyone and have zero respect for adults. My only question here is who taped this whole scenario?

3. As far as this question goes, I think it depends on the age of the child in question. I would never spank a 16 year old... that's ridiculous to me. My oldest baby is nine, and I don't spank him anymore. I take things away, such as TV, games, or find other ways to discipline. I really only give a real spanking maybe a couple of times a year, and only between ages of maybe 5-7? And when I say spanking, I mean bare butt, four or five swats. When DD does something bratty (she's almost 3) I smack her on the hand or the butt (once) and make her sit in her chair in her room. Honestly, discipline should be completely up to the parents, whether they spank or not, as long as it's not abuse. There are plenty of times that abuse goes on where there's no touching at all (like the mom with the hot sauce and putting her kid in a cold shower)... which to me is absolutely horrible.

Alissa_Sal's picture
Joined: 06/29/06
Posts: 6427

I don't mean to be offensive or mean, but I truly don't get the whole spank-and-then-hold-and-tell-them-why-I-did-it routine. I think if you're going to spank that is probably the nicest way to do it, but I don't get the point of the spank in that scenario - why not just skip straight to the hold and talk portion? Is the spank just to get their attention?

Starryblue702's picture
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454

"Alissa_Sal" wrote:

I don't mean to be offensive or mean, but I truly don't get the whole spank-and-then-hold-and-tell-them-why-I-did-it routine. I think if you're going to spank that is probably the nicest way to do it, but I don't get the point of the spank in that scenario - why not just skip straight to the hold and talk portion? Is the spank just to get their attention?

No offense taken. To me it just shows the child that there are consequences for wrongdoings, but it's not done to make the child feel that they're not loved in any way. This is just how I do it, as it was done this way for me and looking back, I understand why I was punished for anything bad that I did, but never thought for one second that my parents didn't love me because I had done something wrong.