Hmm [Adult Death Men't] Totally OT

8 posts / 0 new
Last post
xMyLovelyLadyBumpx's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 02/17/11
Posts: 1198
Hmm [Adult Death Men't] Totally OT

Well a little back story before we get to the current story haha

In December 2007 my mom passed suddenly; she was mentally ill after taking Chantix and did the unthinkable. I found her 2 hours after the fact and the images and thoughts haunt me to this day. She left notes for each of us kiddos, my daddy [step father might as well be my birth father] which we have yet to read because none of us are ready.

Since then the craziest things have happend for example:
-My brother from my bio-father had a dream the following night about her, he saw her in our basement which is weird because he hadnt ever been down there before. In the dream we [my whole family] were all sitting in the basement and she told us all not to cry because she was happy she was no longer in pain.
-My moms best friend's daughter who was 2 at the time said "Mommy is Aunt Amanda an angel" my moms friend says yes why? her daughter said "She follows us in the sky and kisses us before bed. I see her."
-I was in the living room one night on the phone with my friend, the speakers started going insane with static, I unplugged them and it still didnt stop in the static me and my friend could both hear a voice saying 'I love you forever.'
-My radio will turn on to her favorite songs randomly even after Ive turned it off.
-My sister and dad woke up to a bunch of angels my sister got my mom for xmas surrounding the master bed, which they were sharing since my sister refused to sleep alone for a long time.
-The list goes on and on. These things still happen to this day. Some we dont notice until later some are shocking how clearly it happens.

Kaylee is named after my momma, she knows who she is in pictures. Kaylee is constantly 'talking' to my mom during nap and bedtime. She & our dogs would stare at the same spot in the room for long periods of time. She would and will giggle or smile at someone who isnt there ect.

So now onto my reason for all the back story:
-Rowans due date based off my LMP is my moms birthday Jan 21st.
-I have an appointment December 28th [the day she died]@ 10am. The last time I talked to my mom and told her I loved her as we both headed off to work.
-I finally sold my mothers sewing machine that Ive used once but couldnt ever again because it was too hard. I sold it to a woman named Amanda, she has 2 boys and 2 girls just like my mom.
-My moms wedding ring is my wedding ring. I thought I lost the band that the engagment ring sits in while cleaning them since they dont fit right now; nope I found it in a box of Christmas decorations, my moms favorite holiday. I never even touched that box until yesterday since it was all my old tree decor from when I was little. But there it was sitting on top.

Everyone thinks Rowan will be born on a day that is special to my mom since Kaylee was born on a special day for her as well. (: So many signs its so crazy. I truly think these little happenings are her way of staying close to those she left so suddenly. It makes me sad and mad sometimes but usually I cant help but feel so loved! Biggrin

DrakePlusOne's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 4 months ago
Joined: 06/29/09
Posts: 1889

:lurk:
That gave me chills. My father passed when I was little and I'd give anything to have him leave me 'footprints in the sand', if you will. I'm so sorry you had to go through what you did, but it's great to KNOW your mom is at peace and not suffering like she was. Amazing.

ourfirstblessing's picture
Offline
Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 1094

it's nice that you can feel her presence and love, it must be hard not having her here, esp during big life changes...

lysa_v's picture
Offline
Last seen: 4 years 2 months ago
Joined: 06/17/10
Posts: 268

*lurker

WOW, that is amazing. Also gave me chills...
That is A LOT of signs that she is still there with you and your family, how sweet. I bet it can kinda scare you at times too?

verdouxkai's picture
Offline
Last seen: 8 months 1 week ago
Joined: 03/05/07
Posts: 827

That's so eerie, and yet awesome! So glad you can feel love from the signs...

Offline
Last seen: 3 years 3 months ago
Joined: 02/24/11
Posts: 1651

*lurker*
Wow this is the type of thing you read /hear about on tv.. Personally i say embrass it and let it happen !! Your mom obvioysly feels it is necessary for her to still be here and to watch over you so let her ! This story is amazing Smile

RonanTheBarbarian's picture
Offline
Last seen: 2 years 6 months ago
Joined: 05/10/10
Posts: 1084

That's pretty cool, and maybe a little scary at times! But really overall it must feel good sometimes! Let us know if you notice anything else Smile

xMyLovelyLadyBumpx's picture
Offline
Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 02/17/11
Posts: 1198

Its awesome most of the time and yet scary and unsettling at others. (: I love her and miss her so so very much but its nice to know she is always watching us Biggrin