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Thread: Dancing in the tide

  1. #41
    Joshiesmom
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    Quote Originally Posted by enchantedlife View Post
    Hey Elicia! RE stands for Reproductive Endocrinologist. We had considered going to one when we were dealing with infertility, too. We ended up using our OB. I think if he feels a need for you to see an RE, he will refer you, or you can ask for a referral as a back-up. It sounds like he has a great reputation, though! My fingers are crossed for you guys!!
    Thanks Sandy! You are right---I think if we need a referral there is no reason he would choose to keep us there to treat something that was out of his scope. Plus I am keeping hope that this is just a case of something relatively simple!

  2. #42
    Joshiesmom
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    Yay for a much better T-ball practice this evening! The little guy that was causing a ruckus last time got put into a different small group of kids this time so he wasn't with Josh (and, yes, he was hitting some other kid tonight). However, this time his dad was there and the dad would tell him to stop hitting so at least he was not running buck wild.

    Tonight they handed out the team uniform t-shirt and ball cap, so that was pretty cool. They are very nice quality. We still need to go get him the baseball pants, socks, and cleats so perhaps we will do that this weekend since he's got his first game next week.

    In other news, I'm thinking I'm going to try and hold out to POAS for 10-11 more days (until AF is DUE). That way I'm not wasting tests left and right and if I have a crazy (probably anovulatory) cycle like I did last month I won't be burning through the tests for nothing. If I make it to the date of my cycle due date and AF has not arrived or feel like she is impending shortly then I'll test. Besides, since we have our consult next Tuesday (before I'll be testing) I am wondering if they might decide to pull some blood while I'm there anyways and might could tell me if there is a chance from those results. We shall see. I really have no idea what he'll do.

  3. #43
    Joshiesmom
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    Hooray for the weekend! DH made the most delicious cheeseburgers on the grill tonight and even buttered and toasted the buns and cut up my favorite garlic gundelsheim pickles, a beautiful organic hothouse tomato, and he remembered to put the lipton onion soup mix into the meat. The man is a saint.

    Can we switch gears for a minute and spend some time obsessing about some (likely phantom) symptoms? For starters, I woke up with a sore boob today. There IS a possibility someone elbowed me in the night since it was only the one but I'll never know for sure. Being a heavy sleeper is both a blessing and a curse, LOL! The funny part about that is that it's the right one and the reason it matters is because when I was nursing I had named them "low flow lefty" and "tidal wave righty". In my mind that makes it only natural that my higher-functioning boob would be the one to be sore first.

    Next, I noticed yesterday morning when I opened the door of our bedroom after waking up that I smelled the fragrance of our Easter lillies so strongly and they were sitting on the kitchen counter about 15 feet away and around a small corner. Today at work I smelled cigarette smoke as strongly as if someone was literally standing behind me. The lady that sits in the next cubicle over and up one is a smoker so I figured she was standing there and needed some help from me. I turned around and not only was she NOT there but she wasn't even at her desk or anywhere nearby.

    For a few days I have had an on-again-off-again carsick feeling. As I wasn't sick with DS, I'm not sure if it feels like morning sickness or not. Here's the TMI part I wasn't sure I'd post, but what the hey, right? At this point in my cycle the typical CM (sticky) is not here but it's very thin and watery (not egg white) and more than usual, which is usually almost zilch right about now. And finally, I have been more thirsty and have been peeing a lot more than usual, even when I haven't had much to drink. Um, and referencing back to my post a few days ago about the roofers next door using our hose I might say I've been a little moody

    There you have it---a whole bunch of nothing but enough to make me wonder. The next 10 days is going to be pretty long so bear with me, OK?
    Last edited by Joshiesmom; 03-28-2008 at 08:31 PM.

  4. #44
    Joshiesmom
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    In the middle of the night last night poor Joshie woke me up to tell me that his feet were hurting him really bad The boy is growing like a weed, especially his feet. I got up to get him a bit of medicine so he could get back to sleep and I felt sick to my stomach a little. But besides that fleeting moment I have had NO symptoms of any kind today. My smell is not on overdrive, nothing. Nada, zip, zero, zilch. 8 days to go until testing.

    For breakfast I made breakfast tacos that were quite tasty. I started with some fresh minced garlic and chopped onion in just a dab of EVOO and sauteed until tender. Then I added some chopped fresh cilantro and a slice of cheese. A friend of mind got me some local, organic, free-range eggs so I used 2 egg whites and then I cut up a few organic grape tomatoes and just put those on the tortilla fresh without cooking them. The tortillas were freshly made yesterday at my local grocery store and were still hot in the bag when I picked them up. I topped all that off with a little taco sauce and it was so good!

    My husband came in the kitchen to see what was cooking and saw me cooking up garlic & onion for breakfast and gave me a big 'ol eyeroll. So after breakfast for no reason whatsoever, I peeled another fresh clove of garlic and popped in my mouth just raw. Can I please tell you that it was so delicious? I've heard garlic is supposed to be very good for you so I followed that clove up with a tablespoon of Bragg's organic apple cider vinegar and then felt like I'd done something good for myself today, LOL!

  5. #45
    Joshiesmom
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    There was a tornado warning here today, complete with sirens wailing and chants of "seek shelter" resonating throughout the air. Kinda scary! But all was well and our area just got a little bit of heavy rain.

    The big appointment is tomorrow (infertility consult). I am holding out hope that this could be our cycle, but not much hope. Today my CM was sticky and thick, which is normal for my regular non-pg cycle. As I look back on some of my old charts and my newer record-keeping (not charting, just using the OPK's), it dawns on me that my average date of ovulation last summer was on CD 17-18 and now it is CD 12-13. That seems like a wild variation to me and is making me wonder if the internet cheapie OPK's are steering me wrong. When I was temping AND using OPK's the results coincided though, so I can't imagine I'd be getting positive OPK's if my body wasn't producing the LH and I don't think it's possible to ovulate at more than one point in your cycle so the OPK's HAVE to be accurate, right? Perhaps my doctor can make heads or tails of all this tomorrow. You know what is crappy? I logged onto FF.com today to print out my old charts and since my VIP membership is now expired it wouldn't even let me print my old charts out that I made when I did have the VIP membership. I think that's crap. I can understand not letting someone continue to use the VIP feature once their time expires but you should still be able to view and print your OLD charts that you DID pay to have the VIP service when they were created.

    On a positive note, I have to just add that little Joshie is just blowing me away with is reading skills these days. For the longest time he just wasn't very interested in learning to read, even though he was early in learning his alphabet and numbers. We've got the Kindergarten edition of Hooked on Phonics and he is about 70% completed with it and doing great! Since he's in pre-k this year, and is a summer baby (therefore one of the youngest in his class) I'm very impressed with this reading progress! I think he'll be completed with it in a matter of weeks and then we can spend time this summer focusing on keeping him in practice daily with reading.

    Tonight we spent a while playing frisbee in the house with a great big, soft frisbee and it was lots of fun. And nothing got broken in the process, LOL! He is the smiliest, giggliest, FUNNIEST little guy I have ever met.

  6. #46
    Joshiesmom
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    Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I'm feeling a little nervous this morning about this meeting. I have prepped DH that they are going to be asking him for his contribution in all of this and he seemed accepting of that. I spent some time thinking over it this morning and trying to figure out why I am so nervous. Finally I decided I'm feeling this way because there is a chance they might pull some blood to see if I happen to be pg this cycle, and I was counting on another 6 days of not having to get that BFN. At least for the next 6 days I have some tiny amount of hope until I see AF show up. However, with my current CM pattern and lack of any real symptoms I am 99% sure this was not our month anyway. The best thing to do is just sit back and enjoy the ride, right? Either I am or I'm not pg and it's so smoke-and-mirrors of myself to want to choose to live in ignorance for 6 more days. I need to JUST DO IT. I'll update later this afternoon all about it. Send some positive fertility vibes our way if you have any to spare!

  7. #47
    Joshiesmom
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    Here's the skinny on the consult: He basically said that because we already have 1 child and I have been pregnant twice that he's not too worried about the whole thing. Easy to say from sitting on the OTHER side of the desk,LOL! Anyways, he didn't recommend to test DH's count because if they were too low I would not have likely conceived last summer.

    I asked him the cause of fertility issues in someone that has had a child before and basically the answer is that I'm not getting any younger and also factors such as stress play a role. Another big possibility is hormones as that is something that can change over time too. He thinks if we just give it more time it will happen, however, he wanted to run some blood work to check my thyroid levels and hormones, etc. Since my +OPK was 10 days ago he also agreed to throw in an HcG beta test to make me happy Actually that was DH's request! Regarding the OPK's he said that they can and do give positives that do not necessarily mean that ovulation will really occur. So that was something else that he was going to test in my blood work was to see if I really did ovulate since I got a +OPK test this month (and all prior months, even last month that was the wacky 25 day cycle that probably means I did NOT ovulate).

    In the event this is not our month, he is going to call in Rx's for clomid, estrogen, and progesterone and he gave me a chart to tell me how to take all these medicines and when to take them. Then the nurse attempted to take some blood---HA HA HA! I asked her if she would please do a butterfly closure on the top of my hand because my veins roll and collapse and you CANNOT get blood from my inner elbows. I did give her a courtesy attempt because she didn't really want to do the butterfly. After that I was feeling all sweaty and faint-ish so she sent me over to the LabCorp people to have the blood stuff done. After a 30 minute wait in a waiting room that smelled like cigarette smoke they finally took me back and did the butterfly.

    The nurse at my doctor's office said the results would probably be in on Thursday or Friday but because my doctor schedules surgeries for Fridays he probably won't be calling me until Monday I guess it's okay. Either I am or I am not pg. Monday is when AF is due anyways so now I feel bad for having them even do the hcg test when I will either have a BFP/BFN by then anyways.

  8. #48
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    ((HUGS)) I'll be the first person to tell you, secondary infertility can strike. I'm praying for a BFP for you!!!

  9. #49
    Joshiesmom
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    Quote Originally Posted by ShiningLight View Post
    ((HUGS)) I'll be the first person to tell you, secondary infertility can strike. I'm praying for a BFP for you!!!
    Awww, thanks Rachael. Your prayers are much appreciated FOR SURE! Are you a secondary infertility survivor?

  10. #50
    Joshiesmom
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    This morning I had to sit and think about whether I'm that person that posts every little whim and thought into her journal or if I'm that person that cautiously awaits some solid information before putting it out here for all to see. I decided that even though this is a public journal, it's really about being a private outlet for me to jot down my innermost thoughts and feelings without having to talk DH's ear off, LOL.

    Alright, so........here we go.....................I *MAY* have gotten a BFP this morning
    But I'm keeping it on the down low for right now because I'm not sure. The thing is that I'm using the internet cheapies and gosh darnit they are so hard to read unless you are blaringly pregnant. What I learned from my last BFP this past summer was that I hadn't given the tests enough time to work. I'd wait for the control line to show up and then toss it in the trash because there was not a second line. But once I started getting a positive (when AF was actually DUE) I went back into the trash can and found that the previous 4 days had been positive but the line was very very faint. So this time I waited for a few minutes and thought I saw a faint line after putting it up under the brightest halogen lamp in the house And after it dried instead of being a non-colored evaporation line there is a bit of purple color on it.

    DH saw me examining the test under his desk lamp but I told him the results were inconclusive so that I wouldn't get his hopes up or give him false results. Now I'm thinking I'd like to tell him in a special way once (if) I get a darker line (maybe Saturday morning?) so if anybody out there has a great idea for that let me know. When DS was new news I told DH by getting him a card that had a picture of little baby laundry hanging on a laundry line and inside I wrote "Congratulations Daddy". This past summer I just told him the instant I came out of the bathroom because I couldn't wait. So this time I'd like to do something that doesn't require me to go out and buy baby shoes or a rattle but something that is clever and unique. I'll have to think on it and see what comes up. This is all assuming, of course, that either the line gets darker or that my OB calls me up with my blood test results today or tomorrow to confirm the news. The nurse already told me it'd probably be Monday so I'm not holding out too much hope for a call from him today. If anybody is reading this please send up some prayers that this is the real thing and that all turns out healthy this time.

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