Missing my baby angels Kassandra and Nevaeh - Page 22
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Thread: Missing my baby angels Kassandra and Nevaeh

  1. #211


    grrrr, sigh

    I really need to blow off some steam somehow. Lets just say I've had a horrible week, and v-day sucked really bad. So no updates on anything.

    ETA, no pictures, no GC, no TTC, no van

  2. #212


    Jamie has agreed to join me with starting up our support board, we are co-owners/Admin. We are calling it "Safe in My Womb" Which was Jamie's great idea! We had it narrowed down to our top two, and had to ask our husbands to decide for us, yea they were no help...lol. I was ready to flip a coin! Anyways its comming along really good! It's nice to have help. Jamie made a really nice banner for it. We've checking around on differnt hosting sites and softwear. We are going for what is reliable but also cost efficent. I never realized how expencive this kind of thing can get, if you don't choose wisely.

    We are messing around on a free board now, hoping to get the feel of things. We got most our catogories in place and are working on the fourms. We hope to get everything up and running really soon. We were very busy working on it this weekend, we even talked on the phone for a bit! Its nice to put a voice to her face and writings! I had to take yesterday and today off from working on it, becasue of work. Now's that all the research is done things will pick right up.

  3. #213


    We're still tweaking a few things but the board is OPEN!!! PM me or Jamie if you would like the link. We like the board so much that we decided to stay with the free one for now. We'll upgrade later if needed. I feel we'll add more forums as things come up, we are very open minded.

    This is what we have set up for Categories and forums.

    Welcome to Safe In My Womb
    Important Board Information
    Share Your Story


    High Risk Pregnancy
    Continuing Your Journey
    Medical Termination (locked, password protected)
    Hope and Inspiration


    Our surviving miracles

    Break Time!
    Break Room
    Home and Garden

    Healthy Pregnancies
    Relationships (members of the board only)


    Things in my life are so very far from peachy. I'm trying to deal with it all but it's so hard. I just feel like waving a white flag. The hardest part about it all is that at the present moment this is hurting more than my losses are. I've been thinking about the girls but something else is taking up all my thoughts, energy and emotions.

    ETA~ I just realized that Nick thinks that dying means your going to be away for a bit but you'll be back. He's really having a hard time right now. He tries to put things together now, but doesn't really understand it. He told me that Kassandra is playing quietly in heave till she comes home.

  4. #214


    I'll won't be online here @ PO for about 1 week. Things are really crazy around here. Andy's out of town, work is crazy, ect. I've been sort of depressed lately but am working on it. I'm going to a group support meetings now. It's not for loss, but it reminds us to follow the serenity prayer.

    The Serenity Prayer

    God grant me the serenity
    to accept the things I cannot change;
    courage to change the things I can;
    and wisdom to know the difference.

    Living one day at a time;
    Enjoying one moment at a time;
    Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
    Taking, as He did, this sinful world
    as it is, not as I would have it;
    Trusting that He will make all things right
    if I surrender to His Will;
    That I may be reasonably happy in this life
    and supremely happy with Him
    Forever in the next.

    --Reinhold Niebuhr

    Things are finally comming along with our gentic counseling. I FINALLY have talked to her! She went over Kassandra's records and is going to send us referral. I'll explain in details later about what she said, I just wanted to speak with my MW about it all, first.

  5. #215



    Sorry it has been so long. We've been through alot. Life has been complicated and busy. I always thought if I could just work though my losses life would be good. I don't think I'll ever get there.

    I have so much to update yet don't really know where to start. So I'll just start out with here, present time. Maybe later I'll share what I've been up to these past months.

    Nick turned 3 in July, he's getting really big, so smart makes me laugh everyday. He is NEVER EVER taken for granted. He truly is a wonderful little boy!

    Andy is doing OK, he has had a rough 6m but is recovering well.

    I'm well I guess. I miss my babies so much. I try to get on with life but its so hard. I'm glad I have Nick, Andy and work to keep me going on.

    Thats really it for now, I hope all is well with everyone here.

  6. #216


    HI, I just wanted to update everyone on our family.

    Kassandra and God have led me to working with special need's children. I've been running the family business, a personal care provider organization. We provide care to elderly, disabled adults, and most recently children in thier homes. It's quiet an experience. I work with lots of families and do tons of paperwork! I really enjoy helping the children's special need's the most. Since I never got to bring my baby home, I'm helping others care for theirs, it really helps my peace at heart.

    Andy and I are also doing respite care in our home and are working towards getting a bigger place to do foster care.

    Andy is doing great as he's working towards getting his CDL. In hopes that it'll provide better job opportunities.

    Nick is now 3 and is enjoying going to ECFE. He's fully potty trained and growing everyday. He amazes me so much, I don't know what I would have done without him. Nick currently has a cast on his hand, it got caught in the sliding door of the van a week ago. Just like his sister he's a fighter. The only time she ever fussed in the NICU was when the doctors were picking on her, and this Nick is exactly the same! He broke the metacarpal bone, but is doing great. It hasn't bothered him at since the day it happend. And it definitely hasn't slowed him down one bit! Friday he gets more x rays and possibly gets this cast taken off. Please send him some quick healing vibes. He's excited about Halloween, he wants to be a pirate! I hope this year I can enjoy taking him out, the last few years I've been petty down.

    I don't think I posted this before but the stone is done. We had Neveah's name added to it and changed the wording on it a bit. I've been pretty unhappy about how Kassandra's picture turned out, not even close to the proof they sent to us. But its all done so there's nothing we can do about it. Maybe in the future we can take the picture out and replace with a differnt one. I've gotten two new really nice silver vase for the cemetery next spring. I also bought flowers but the neighbors dog got ahold of it all and ruined it. I'm on the lookout for some new ones.

    On October 21 it will be the one year anniversary of losing Nevaeh. Soon with be Christmas and Kassandra's 2yr anniversary. I'm glad I have God in my life and he has carried me through all this, without him I'd be nowhere.


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