Thread: The next chapter: After Joseph

February 25, 2208
29w5d

This is the milestone I have been waiting for -- 29w5d is when we lost Joseph. I'll be happy when tomorrow comes.

I still worry all the time, that there is something wrong with this pregnancy. I have nothing to base this on, except for measuring large. I have been measuring large (fundal height) since my ultrasound, which showed the baby to be measuring just fine, and my amniotic fluid was measuring spot on too. It's just the way I am I guess. With DS1 I measured correctly. I guess it could be the 40 lbs I didn't take off after Joseph was born. I'm also kind of short, so the baby has no place to go but out.

I think we've decided on a name. I like it fine, but I'm not sure it's "the one". We're living with this decision for a bit to see if it sticks. Unfortunately DS1 has already been using it, so he'll be the hardest person to convince if we change it.

Janel

3/15/2008
32w3d

Time is creeping by. I can't imagine making in through another 8 weeks. I'm still measuring large, but not by as many (only 4cm instead of 7 at my 20 week, so measuring 36 weeks)

Today DH and DS are gone overnight to a camping trip at a local Children's museum. I have the next 15 hours to myself. I'm going to do a lot of nothing. Watch tv and lie on the couch, it's about all I feel up for.

I still get anxious about this baby. I worry about too few kicks or two many kicks. It's never ending isn't it? I know I worry about DS1 still too. It's just a different kind of worry because someone else can share in the responsibility of caring for him. With the baby in my stomach, I'm the only one that can care for him at this moment.

Janel

04/07/2008
35w5d

Nothing new to report, I'm just counting down the days. Hurry up May! I don't know how I'm going to last until then. I'm cranky, having trouble eating, having trouble sleeping (most DS1's fault). The house is a pigsty and I have no motivation to do anything about it -- and when I don't keep it picked up DH doesn't either.

Janel

4/16/2008
37w

37 weeks today! Officially full term. I never thought I'd get here. Now we're just waiting for something to happen.

We're not quite ready, no place for the baby to sleep when he comes home, but DH can take care of that when I'm in the hospital if need be. The house is still a mess. I guess my mom can take care of that when she comes, as obviously DH is not going to do it.

I feel funny today -- lots of pelvic pulling/tugging and I feel like I'm going to throw up. That motivated me to get the last load of laundry in. I still need to wash his take home outfit (100% wool, so can't go in the machine). That worries me a little because if we try to wash it while I'm in the hospital, there's no way it will dry in time. Just need to get to that today.

Janel

4/20/2008
37w4d

Had a few contractions on Thursday that made me realize how close this is. It scared me a bit, but I'm ready!

Janel

4/25/2008
38w2d

Still hanging in! Now that I've made it this far, I want to make it to May. Too many April birthdays in our family. My 38 week appointment was today -- measuring 40 weeks, baby is not engaged. Since I'm not a FTM, the baby may not engage until right before birth. He's been kicking up a storm. I'm almost done with the baby blanket, and then one more booty to knit. Other than that, I'm done. Though I can't find the Moby wrap and I've run out of placed to look. Hopefully it will show up soon or I'll be tempted to buy another one. I just can't figure out where it went.

Janel

4/28/2008
38w5d

It looks like we'll be safe from delivering on my sister's birthday (today, the 28th) unless I have a super fast labor. No signs of anything yet.

When I was putting DS1 to bed tonight, he told me he thinks the baby is coming tonight. We'll see! I told him it would be nice to see the baby in the morning, wouldn't it? I know he's tired of me being pregnant. I'm not very much fun like this.

Janel

5/1/2008
39w1d

It's MAY! Finally. I never though I'd get this far. Now the little guy just has to decide when to make his entrance. All along we've told DS1 that his brother is coming in May. Today DH and I were talking and mentioned we'd made it to May. So now Will thinks his brother is coming today and didn't want to go to school -- he doesn't want to miss it. We had to explain that even though it's May, the baby gets to pick which day in May to come. I think Will is really really tired of Mommy being pregnant. I'm tired of it, DH is tired of it. Today would be a good day to have a baby but no signs of anything. With both my previous deliveries, I had a couple of days warning with bloody show, etc. Nothing now.

Did I mention that my mom is driving me crazy? She's currently camping out at my sister's house, just waiting for this baby. I think she expects that she'll be at the delivery. Um, nope. She hasn't asked, so I haven't had to tell her no. But if she does ask, I will say no. She's welcome to see him when he's a few hours old. I told my sister (and said "don't tell mom", which I'm sure she will now) that Mom was not invited. From that conversation, I got the vibe that my sister expected to be invited. Double nope. I really hope I go into labor in the wee hours of the morning so I have a good excuse not to call anyone.

Janel

5/4/2008
39w4d

I think I might be in labor. It's so hard to figure it out. I'm having contractions, often, but the aren't lasting for very long. They're about 30-45 sec long, with a couple lasting 1 - 1/2 minutes. We've called my mom to come stay with us tonight, so if it is the real thing, we don't have to wake her up in the middle of the night.

Janel

Thomas Harlow N
8lbs 9oz
21 in
5/5/2008 (39w5d)
1:05am

He's a gorgeous little boy with pale blond hair and two of the cutest dimples ever. He's 2 lbs bigger than his brother was. I hope his take home outfit fits. I was suprised he was so big.

Fast labor, which unfortunately meant I didn't get my antibiotics for GSB+. He had some trouble maintaining his temperature and keeping his oxygen levels up, so he's in the NICU until at least Wednesday. They are waiting for test results to figure out if he has an infection or there is some other issue.

I'm up around the clock working on BFing. He's latching like a champ but like his brother is tongue-tied and that affects his latch (and causes some pain to me too)

Pics and whole story to come.

Janel