The most difficult part of being a mother.
The most difficult part of motherhood is the letting go and letting God part. Its knowing you have done everything you can to teach values and responsibility, to let them learn and yet know they are safe and loved, to help them find their way - and then let go and let them fall.
The most difficult part of being a mother is seeing your children make life changing mistakes and having to shut your mouth and let them make their choices. Its realizing that you cannot make their choices for them, that they want to do it their way. Maybe ask for your advice, but then make their choice to listen or ignore you.
The most difficult part of being a mother is watching them make mistakes, and not telling them that they are making mistakes.
The most difficult part of being a mother is watching them make choices that are not the choices I would make --but realizing that what may be a mistake to me, may not be a mistake to them. And if it is, it is theirs to learn from.
I made plenty of choices that my parents, and others around me that helped to guide me, felt were mistakes. What the hell was I doing being a foster mom at 23; what was I thinking when I adopted a nine year old special needs kid at 25. My mother very much disagreed with my choice of mate -- at least until she met him- I had an advanced degree, he didn't finish college. He would never be able to support the family, support me in the fashion I wanted -that's okay mom, I will support the family. He had the "baggage" of two teenage girls" girls that I have come to love as if they were my own -girls my dad calls his grandchildren, girls who my dad is the only real grandparent they ever have known.
I look back at that and try to remember that I made choices that were not my parents' choices, choices others felt were mistakes, that are great and important parts of my life. What was a mistake to them, was a blessing to me.
The hardest part of being a mother is to accept the choices that my children make, even if I think they are wrong, to let them learn and let them grow. To let them have different values and different lifestyles then those I have, to let them find their way in the world. To be there for them while letting them fall, to not rescue them when they need it, and to accept that maybe they don't really need to be rescued. To grieve for the pain they feel while letting them feel the pain deeply.
Perhaps what I see as a mistake may be their greatest blessings. I love my children but I cannot live their lives for them. After being a hands on parent for years, I must sit back and let them go.