I have so much to say, and no time to say it with, no matter how fast I actually type. bazaar is looming and I feel totally unprepared. I hate this feeling
got some great stuff tho, a catalog of sorts, a banner ordered, and set up is tomorrow afternoon. Mark is headed home early to help watch the boys, but mostly is catch up stuff right now. Dear God, what have I got myself into?!?!?!?!?!
what a night. I didn't touch her tho, and I didn't run her down with the truck. and right after the hockey game too. dumb B!TCH almost ran Brian over in her rush to get out of her f*cking parking spot. her damn truck rolls forward a few inches. never mind she wasn't going to get out of her space any time soon, it was packed. never mind she can't park and was at a pretty good angle in her spot (and thus VERY close to us) and all I was trying to do is get him out of the cold and out of her way, but NO, she pulls forward. I freaked out. she is lucky I didn't haul her massively fat and ugly a$$ out and beat her. what I DID do is yell (oh yeah, she heard me) and slap the side of her truck as I pushed Brian up against the truck and try to protect him with my body. OMG the things that ran thru my head. I am trying to figure out where I can put him QUICKLY to keep him safe, and next thing I know the B!TCH comes around the front of the car on her f*cking cell phone. let me tell you, yes, dispatch heard me. knowing she was not driving I grabbed Brian and hauled him (now bawling) into the truck where Mark grabbed him and got him in. I smacked the door shut and recommenced yelling information for the dispatch, like F150 2004 SUPERCREW, YOU ALMOST HIT MY SON
I finally got in the truck (at Mark's urging, he thought I was going to kill her, I might have). and it finally dawns on me that AHA! I TOO HAVE A CELL PHONE
dispatch knew right away who I was. interesting
Mark was just trying to keep me IN the truck at that point, and we were told to wait for the cops to arrive. the officer asked her what was going on, then came over and I told him she damn near ran him over. he went back to talk to her and she left. not at all sure what he told her, don't really care either, but then he came over and said that everything was going to be let go. the other officer (we ended up with like 4 of them there, 2 from the Coliseum) said he would have broken a window had she done that to his kid.
damn I wanted to lay hands on her. right after I hauled Brian in the car and closed it, I looked down. there lay his binky. OMG that has me crying now. had me freaked out totally yesterday. all I can remember is the news story of the lil kid that was hit and the shoes were left in the road. Brian does NOT give up his binky for ANYONE. and there it lay. was a late night last night too. and all at a hockey game. yeah, we aren't violent
ok, most of the time
but you mess with my kid, and I will put on quite a show it seems
Mark kept me sane. I can't believe how violent I became so fast. the rage, the fear. the out of control. he said, hey, you did right, you protected your son. try to let it go. I still want to hurt her. she better not catch me at a game. Mark will have to restrain me, and I will let the whole world know what a dumb sh!t she is. damn cow
I know I had something to say, I just can't remember what I was going to say. frustrating
one thing I am working on is another bazaar. will find out tomorrow, but that wasn't it. opened this darn window this morning, and didn't find that out til this evening
damn blonde moments are ganging up on me. I need MORE SLEEP. hey, at least the house is looking better. got some things rearranged too
AHA! I remember
I have made MYSELF some bracelets. they are NOT for sale. I REALLY like them. I even made some more musical anklets. am now out of bells, which really sucks, but I can get more locally wanna make me a blue one and a black one. and beads are fun again
and I need to restock on some of the earring findings. wow, they are cool, make really pretty and really fast pieces that seem to sell. almost instant gratification, doesn't get much better then that
this is for Robin who is STILL invited for Turkey, WITH her family! Mom would be thrilled, she grew up one of 5 kids and a "crowd" is what we all love
This is for your entire life.
( ) Crashed a friend's car
( ) stolen a car
(X) been in love
(X) been dumped
( ) shoplifted ..
(X) been fired
(X) been in a fist fight (OK, I was, she was busy pulling hair)
(X) snuck out of your parent's house
(X) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
(X) gone on a blind date
(X) lied to a friend
(X) skipped school
( ) seen someone die
(X) been to Canada
( ) been to Mexico
(X) been on a plane
( ) purposely set a part of yourself on fire
( ) eaten sushi
( ) been skiing - snow, not water (water yes, snow no)
(X) met someone from the internet (married someone from the internet)
(X) been at a concert
(X) taken painkillers (I am not thrilled with em tho)
(X) love someone or miss someone right now
(X) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go
(X) made a snow angel
(X) had a tea party
(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves
(X) gone sledding
(X) cheated while playing a game (SSHHH!)
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake ID.
(X) watched the sun set
(X) felt an earthquake
(X) slept beneath the stars (it wasn't on purpose)
(X) been tickled
( ) been robbed
(X) been misunderstood
(X) petted a reindeer/goat/kangaroo
( ) won a contest (I never win anything either)
(X) run a red light/stop sign. *SNORT* yeah right
( ) been suspended from school
(X) been in a car crash - only sorta
( ) had braces
(X) felt like an outcast/third person
( ) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(X)danced in the moonlight
(X) liked the way you looked
(X) witnessed a crime
(X ) questioned your heart
(X) been obsessed with post-it notes (you should see my kitchen!)
(X) squished mud through your bare feet.. (OH that feels good!_
( ) been lost...
(X) been on the opposite side of the country
(X) swam in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
( ) cried yourself to sleep (close tho)
(X) played cops and robbers
(X) recently colored with crayons
(X) sang karaoke (I don't usually cop to this ya know)
(X) paid for a meal with only coins (fast food count?)
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls...
(X) laughed until some kind of beverage came
out of your nose
(X) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) danced in the rain
(X) written a letter to Santa Claus .
(X) been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) watched the sun rise with someone you care about (ok, I did at the time)
(X) blown bubbles
( ) made a bonfire on the beach (wish I had tho, workin on it, can't wait to do it with Mark and the boys)
( ) crashed a party
(X) gone roller-skating
(X) had a wish come true
( ) jumped off a bridge
I just want you to know Robin, I don't usually admit to half of these
wow, what a great day! Mom got here this am around 9:30-10 and we were were out of here 10:30-45 and off to shopping we did have a good time, and the boys for the most part were really good. went to Olive Garden first, that was good, as usual...went to Sears where the stroller was majorly psycho, needs grease in the wheels, cleaning and selling (most likely), I hate that thing. bought it for a friend of mine, and she just returned it a couple months ago. I can see why (ah well)...went to Sears, but cuz of the stroller problem (and tired boys) we didn't venture to the mall more then that. got me some sweaters, G-ma bought Brian gloves/mittens set, and he loved that...got Alex a hat and gloves as well, and some snowflake lights (OOOOOOO PRETTY) AND did a and put them on the credit card. I like those things, and I remember why they get me into trouble way too easy to use. is why Sears gets me into trouble, I dont' have to have it with me to use it, just my information and my id
went to Burlington Coat Factory and got the boys some odds and ends, looked at leather coats for me, which was a complete and total flop found several I LOVED but none that fit. either they are for very large women with very short arms, or they are for women with narrow shoulders, I am neither. ok, I admit, I am fat. honestly, I don't like it but I also don't care enough to change that. of course wt loss isn't going to make my shoulders narrower or my arms much smaller. I am also strong, but doing what I do will do that, kwim? I am STILL built like a sh!t kicker. I did look at the mens stuff, but didn't find a style that went OH WOW, so.....*sigh* no coat. would love to find one and tell Mark to go get it. of course hell hasn't frozen over, and I DON'T want him to spend his precious $ and fight like last yr. he is going to be peeved at me already, cuz I am going to stick that rule to him, but I am going to reupholster his chair (dear God, do you know how much that COSTS? )
not gonna let him explode like he did, it just isn't going to happen, I don't think our marriage could stand another repeat of last post-Christmas.
but anyhow, I digress. we went SHOPPING!! we had a pretty good time, came home, got a little cleaning done, some laundry (ya know, dent in the always replenished growing pile), swept and mopped the kitchen floor, got all my beads off the table, and Mom and Dad stayed for dinner. Brian was SO thrilled. and when they took off, I had him bribbed and distracted enough that he didn't even notice. I am not his hero but getting there
let him have choc milk in the truck, he was so careful and good with it. gave him plenty of treats, and we were playing with his flash cards when they left. so what if it matters to me that I am the good guy, it works for me
and with that, I am going to go watch hockey etc with my husband.
oh yeah, and got the confirm from the up coming bazaar. got another one to do and I am not stressing over this one. AND I am hosting a quickie buy on one of my bead boards. this should be rather interesting. honestly, I haven't been this excited or ready for Christmas to get here for years. life, at least for now, is really good!
ok, so I am sitting her bawling my brains out. good thing I can sorta type cuz I can't make out the screen hardly. my son, my beautiful red headed son has herpes all over the inside of his mouth. and I mean ALL OVER. tongue, throat, gums, all over. he has a nasty fever, he is in so much pain. one of us most likely gave it to him thru kissing. Mark has that lovely gift that keeps on giving. he alternates between crying and writhing in pain and sleeping, even moaning in his sleep. took 3 F!CKING DRS TO FIGURE THAT OUT. he is now on acyclovir. I saw it today, finally. honestly I want a divorce. or just to hurt him. I didn't have it before we met. I haven't had an outbreak in yrs, but he has (while preg with Alex)
and now I am deathly afraid Alex will get it as well. what the hell do I do now? today, now, after seeing the label on the bottle, I am trying not to hate him. to me it would be worse for the boys to grow up with single parents and this will pass, or at least I hope it will. I am sure he doesn't even know I am that angry and that he will brush it aside. he also has decided I am not worth listening too
OMG I CAN'T DO THIS....he is sitting on the couch chanting owowowowowOWOWOWOWOW. oh God, what do I do?
it took almost a week for everything to clear out from onset. things started breaking Thurs, Fri wasn't too bad and Mark finally went back to work and stayed there all day. at least he was here and helping out. on the other hand, it scares me to death to think it might put his job in jeopardy, cuz that would mean going BACK to ID. not sure I am willing to do that again, but not gonna say never. am 99% sure I can't do this by myself.
and Mark has NO clue where Brian got his cold sores. he said "he could have got them anywhere"
well, NO dipsh!t, he COULDN'T. I have warned him a couple times NOT to put the binky in his mouth, and last time he gave me a borderline dirty look. silly boy doesn't know how to give a good death look. Brian is already better at it then he is. of course it gets Brian into a heap o trouble.
and if I have to tell him again, I am sure we are going to go around. both of us have been on the edge with Brian not doing so well. and Mark had NO CLUE I was upset with him. that's a man for ya I guess
back to Brian tho, he didn't hardly anything for 5-6 days. we could get a couple bites in him, and then fight for fluids. by Weds night, we could put him in the tub for a bath at night and get him to drink a good bit. worked Thurs night too. Friday night he wasn't near as impressed, esp since it included food, veggies, and he didn't want any of that. BUT, we did get him to drink a smoothie yogurt thing Thurs am. that was really when things started getting a little better. but now I am in the process of making sure he eats. he isn't near as interested in food of the healthy variety. he used to love chicken and now.....not so impressed, and the fight is on. of course, he will eat chips, ice cream and yogurt etc. anything with mega sugar
oh yeah. cookies too. found out one of the meds they had him on is Lortab. yeah, kids vicodin. I wasn't impressed, but it was one of the only things that worked, altho motrin worked on one part, the vic on another, and the acyclovir cleared up the sores. he had 2 on his lower lip and a BUNCH in his mouth. I got glimpses of them. OMG what a mess. poor kid is quite a bit bonier then he was and that so bothers me. but if I can't get him to eat, kids are supposed to be skinny, right? he isn't suffering right now. ok, unless he is in trouble which for the day he has been a TERROR. the newest threat is asking him if he wants meds. things really calm down in a hurry, he does NOT want meds, and he is REALLY sure.
yesterday he was laughing and playing, today he was pretty much back to his normal self totally. ok, except now he doesn't want to eat much
so life goes back to some semblance of normal. during one of my testier moments a few days ago, Mark got too close to the fangs and claws and I took a swipe at him. reminded him we are NOT exchanging gifts this Christmas, and told him I would take anything he got me back. he gave me a pained look. ya know, that OH SH!T I was hoping she would forget look. he has tried to keep his distance for the most part, until about Friday. I actually let him touch me, and he wanted hugs and kisses. I wanted them, but didn't, kwim? I still can't believe he didn't know how mad I was. we did have a passing conversation about it, so he has an extremely vague idea what is going on. but the words extreme and vague are pretty mild. he lives in lala land some days
Saturday I did my second bazaar. wasn't bad at all really, didn't sell a ton, but I did sell some. there were plenty of others there, but I had the higher end stuff. it showed. not that other's didn't have cute stuff, they did. but the look of glass and plastic doesn't compare to crystal and stone. sold some crystal to my neighbor who seriously drooled over my box. not much. just a few. she also loved Liz's blankets and bought one. sold some of those too. NICE
and now, I feel like kaka. the cold that has been hanging in the wings is hitting with full force. is probably what Brian had to get the whole thing started with a stuffy nose, sore throat, low grade fever and nasty a$$ed headaches. of course, those could also be from lack of sleep, tension, high bp (meds for that, so doubt it) and too much suger, or a combination thereof *EEK* for some reason I haven't been getting much sleep. today I crashed and hard. at least Mark was kind enough to let me. some days he is brilliant, too bad it wasn't more often.
and I had been planning on getting his scanky old chair redone, but it isn't going to happen. it would so piss him off right now, he has out and out said keep the $ spending down, etc etc etc etc
and Alex! wow, my lil boy. the baby is going going almost gone. he rolls all over, has the starts of a scootch, still jumps like mad either in a person's lap or in his excersaucer. he is finally teething. Mark can't feel it. is ok, I can still put my finger in there and I can, feels like he will do 2's like his brother. that's ok, at least for the most part he is easy about it. started chanting dadadadadadadadaaaaaaaaaa the other day and is making all sorts of noised and inflections. zerberts galore, waves, hugs, man he is growing so fast too. hard to carry too far
and he is still a champion nurser. he wants food now, esp my potatoes made some garlic red mash with a lil cheese tonight and he wolfed them puppies down that's MY boy!
SO, like 2 weeks for Christmas, I still need to mail my sisters package to AK figure out a gift for Mom and finish things off. am looking for a leather jacket for me, but can't find anything I like that fits my shoulders and long arms. guess fat chicks aren't supposed to be built like me
ah well, men's jackets fit sometimes. but PHOOEY. Burlington had one with a fur colar that was gorgeous
too much to hope for I guess. wish I could go outside and play, but DAMN it is cold out there!
tonight I am going to take a break. warned Mark all about it too. I am going to go grab a hamburger (and fries, and pop, maybe a milkshake!), get my nails done and do some last min Christmas shopping. I wanna be done tonight, or at least pretty damn close. Brian is doing GOOD. eating like a pony, of course, not like a horse cuz he is only a toddler :rofl: that does my heart a ton of good. and Alex. lil teething terror that he is. Daddy can handle him. after last night Daddy is GOING to handle him! GEEZ
I should go to Red Robin. have me a Jungle Shake. a girly drink. I should get me a limo and go get wasted. yeah, that sounds good
will have to see if I can get ahold of Liz. she can be a partner in crime. that would be fun, but I know she isn't likely to go. zillion reasons. ah well, is a nice thought at least I am getting OUT
interesting. the other day I was getting ready to shower, Brian walks in and he gets all silly and announces "MAMA'S NAYKIT!" and starts identifying things. it seems I have a PEENIS! :rofl: and I said no, girls don't have penis's and he screwed up his lil face trying to digest that one. then he grins and says AWEKS NUM NUMS! NEEPLES!! OMG that kid is too cute *sigh* some days ya just wanna cry and some days ya wanna throttle the lil bugger. he is being extra good. we are back to working on pt and he is doing ok. love that kid
and Alex is growing so fast. he is now in 12-18 mo stuff, mostly cuz his torso is getting SO long. never mind so is his legs, but still, HOLY MOLY. his hair is coming in and the more he gets, the more red it goes. really cool, looks like either another red or a red strawberry blonde. might end up brown, which is just fine by me AS LONG AS he doesn't have my skin tone. poor kid, I don't wish that on anyone
went shopping Monday night, all alone. SOOOOOOOO nice. had a really bad night Sun night, bad day Monday, I warned Mark ahead of time he was going to be abandoned, and that included dinner. had a guac bacon burger at Carls. those are GOOD. works for me got my nails done, they look......nice enough. had them shortened from last time, they were TOO long but I do like the look. never mind I can't do much with em
and I did end up at the mall. didn't get much there. more just walking around, which made for much better sleep Monday night . Alex was somewhat cooperative for sleep, just had a hell of a time getting there. ah well. last night he wasn't bad but I had a lil problem that has been croppign up the last few days, I get to RUN (do not walk, RUN) to the bathroom
so anyway, in my weakness yesterday, I emailed Mark and told him I wanted the Koil Kutter for Christmas. I am so going to regret this. no question. having said that, I know what I am getting him for Christmas already, and am going to order it shortly. something for his Mustang. damn that thing is expensive. bet we regret that shortly too.
ah well. come see come saw. I shouldn't complain, I have my truck. wish I had a nice house. would be nice to fit...have some ideas, found that dispite all his whinings when I change thigns around while he is at work it doesn't bother him. we talk it to death for a couple weeks then I just do it and he was happy as a clam he didn't have to do it
gonna hit the back room when Christmas is done. have plans, and part includes getting my table back and moving the jewelry to the desk, which is moving to the living room yadda yadda yadda
I am pushing for an addition. Fri we need to go see what the city is planning for the field next door. looks like they are gearing up for SOMETHING. not going to stress on what that is. BUT IF they are going to put a road thru our prop we ARE moving, and that ISN'T neg, even Mark tentatively agreed to that. will see if he sticks with it.
damn he has me on edge. I hate that. I don't want to hate Christmas, but I am so getting there. too bad we can't go caroling or something. that would be great fun! sledding. that's it, I wish we could take the boys sledding.
I have wander lust something fierce this year. maybe we WILL be headed to CA next yr. that would be fun! spring tho, I remember CA heat. it gets plenty hot enough here, I don't need to head there for that
who knows, maybe it is time for Mark to get serious about job hunting. I wouldn't mind moving out of the area. hate to say that, but................................
ack, I am sitting here being a bit pissy today. HEY, I don't feel good, don't f with me buddy! anyhow, after he pissed me off, I come back here on the puter to check things out. been back over on the anything board. will see how long it takes for me to get entirely disgusted
checking my beady stuff too.....(sigh).....contemplating my sister's gift (ok, trying to figure, make new or out of inventory..........hmmmm)
and I am not wearing my wedding rings. been irritating my callus lately. but I am wearing my new jump ring opener ring thing. too funny. a cheap but fun toy that doesn't fit over the knuckle or a spendy pretty ring