and Brian's baby pics...I don't want to lost those
oh yeah, and my new sewing maching that Mark knows nothing about :twisted: have I mentioned that? a neat lil embroidery one from Walmart...brothers, clearance, something I can download stuff for...can't get it out yet, he might see it :shock: not that he is going to make me take it back, but he might try and we don't want that!!
FLAME ON BABY FLAME ON!!
ever heard of the expression of spitting in the wind? is blowing outside...not too bad (so far only 10-15 with 30 mph gusts) at least not yet, but I had quite a few things I wanted to do today cuz it is supposed to be warm...yuck, guess it is warm cuz of the wind, why can't it FEEL warm too?? I know I know whine whine...I hate winter already, I am ready for my bulbs to spring, to be able to go outside and dig my corner fence posts in and get started on my pasture and this years' gonna be gigantic garden (I have like 1/4 ac or more if I WANT to do it)
and I think we have discovered the cause of our fights...drum roll....STRESS...Mark is so overwhelmed at work and so tired of working 60+ hrs a week, and I am so tired of being here alone (or just alone) and neither of us is sleeping well and making BOTH of us tired and grumpy...not a good combination and we are trying to just get thru Feb, which is when this big proposal thing is all supposed to be finished....he is still learning and he isn't sure of himself and he hates that....learning fast tho....
and with that I need to get back to my son, who is currently in the hobby room which is a def nono...he is pushing around the girl's food bowl, and they need to go outside anyway...I need to get with life today no matter how uninterested I am in today itself, wind and all
well, I would love to say nothing is new, but.....here a bit ago I had some spotting...ok, maybe not really even spotting, and it was old, nothing red, all brown (hey, this IS my journal, sorry if it is tmi), but it was there...oh yeah, so run out and test, right? *sigh* I did...no, I am not...BUT, today, run to the potty and OMG there is TONS of cm (that is what that is, right?) and it is gooey, stringy...and I STILL feel gooey (yuck, really)...yeah, we were fooling around a LITTLE this morning, but didn't finish (don't ask) but we WILL tonight! man oh man but we DID have some FABULOUS sex on Sun...I was starting to think it wouldn't ever go back to that good...it has been good, but WE ARE TALKING FABULOUS HERE! oh man, talk about peeling me off the ceiling
hey, maybe I can join Kym in the Jan preg column...wouldn't that be fun??? altho I am not sure she wants to hear about it, I don't actually get sick, I just don't eat much...but who knows, maybe with A LITTLE GIRL I will!! (still thinking pink)
on the other hand, I had a dream Sun or Mon night...I dreamed about another lil red headed boy....altho this one looked more like my sister, not quite as much hair either.....she did loose her baby at about 9 weeks...she is dealing with it I guess, I am worried about it, but she says she is....how on earth do you DEAL with THAT? so now my question is who's child did I dream about? and he was all bundled up real warm too, like it was winter, and with her being in AK, is hard to tell...it was SO vivid! yeah yeah, I took another test, it came up neg too....just checking....hey, if I can't spend the $$ we have, WHAT GOOD IS IT DOING US???
well, my lil mooseling is shaking his crib...is about time he got up....is lambing season and Mom has her hands full....so I get to go back down AGAIN and help her out...damn but the crazy lamb lady wants some bummers (that would be me!)....went and held hers and I WANT SOME!!!
ok, gotta go rescue him...he is makign happy sounds and if I wait for him to complain I will pay for it!
hey, maybe I can join Kym in the Jan preg column...wouldn't that be fun??? altho I am not sure she wants to hear about it, I don't actually get sick, I just don't eat much...but who knows, maybe with A LITTLE GIRL I will!! (still thinking pink)
Why wouldn't I want to hear about it? I'll keep my fingers crossed, I need some company on the Jan. board! Not liking the fact that you don't get sick! I am majorly jealous! I still feel like crap!
OMG! I am a BIG idiot! I really didn't mean to post that in YOUR journal! :doh: Not sure what to do!
I AM SOOOO SORRY!
and here I thought I was going to have to be postal on someone!!! silly silly Kym! are you having a major blonde moment??
*sigh* I hate Mark's job...I really do...first they tell us we ARE headed to ID, which, face it, I don't want to do anyway...so he is making preparations, I am looking at the post falls paper for apts, making arrangements for a house/pet sitter, and he tells one of his contract contacts and BAM, she in turn talks to his boss, who FLIPS OUT...what an ass...I don't care for him (greasy lil bugger)...he would make a good car salesman, beef things up on one hand, stab ya in the back with the other...so he is in ID and calls the other owner (there are 5 I think) and Mark can hear him on the phone, he is that pissed off...Mark was like WHAT DID I DO? he was tryin to get things taken care of and then it was like "well why did you tell her, it is only a bid?"
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? they TOLD Mark he WAS GOING to ID! there was NO mention of a maybe, we were TOLD to pack up and go on March 1, not you MIGHT be going....welcome to the private sector...
so anyway, I got some curtains made for Brian's room...oh man I haven't done that bad a sewing job in ages, but it works....they are at least done (I guess)...won't be telling anyone WHO made them either! but they are lined too and that is a great thing....was a very bad girl today between ebay and Walmart....did get some snoopy fabric today to make a twin comforter (really cute too!)....still have some sewing to do but is all doable and I will get the curtains hung as soon as I find the hardward to hang it with
forgot THAT at Walmart...sheesh
and feeling off...I want to say I am preg, but it is too early to test by about a week (I think), but still....had a baby dream already, think I mentioned that (or tried too earlier, I lost a good post earlier)...THINK it was a he...most likely I am developing a head cold, peachy! headache, drip, cough, upset tummy (from drip)
speaking of he, HE is up....been quite a grump today...so far he has 5 teeth, the other front one is all but in, got some premolars coming in, not gonna put MY fingers in there to find out....tickling works better for a quick peek! looks like 3-5 more are coming in...why can't they COME IN ALREADY!!
hm......he is quiet....false alarm.....so anyway, was packing up to get Brian etc in the house and found A FLOWER!!!! a yellow one, OMG!!! A FLOWER!!!!! think is a crocus....altho I don't remember BUYING those, that doesn't mean I didn't, I got more than plenty coming up! is 50 deg outside today and sunshine....got the roundup on some of the grass, will see if it works (it says 60, but if I remember, it just takes longer if less then 60 and it isn't supposed to freeze tonight)...grass is growing like crazy already and I would say we need to start mowing before March is done...got the buds on some of the shrubs swelling too....OH MAN, I LOVE LOVE LOVE SPRING!
ok, got another complaint, don't want him good and pissed before I get him up....will peek first to see if he really needs "rescuing"
he did, and man has he been grumpy today...SHEESH, even Daddy doesn't want to put up with it and he got an extra nap, which, btw, did NOTHING to improve ANYTHING
finally got him to eat some dinner at 8...found the brackets to hang the curtains, played in the grass and talked to the neighbor til Daddy got home...then he got grumpy again, I hung his curtains...they need more work
*sigh* I used to be pretty good at this sort of thing...guess I just have toooooo much help :roll:
well, IF this is the month I get preg, I certainly am ready for it now! I WANT ANOTHER BABY!!! and now I am really sure and, according to the preg.org calander we did just about everything right IF I am cycling...not only did we bd on Valentines, we did it twice! (just to make sure...NOT) and OMG talk about mind blowing and here I had been worried I couldn't do that anymore...not that Mark hasn't been trying his best, but my bod just hasn't been able to "hit that high note"...boy has it been tho, starting about the 6th
*whew* talk about peeling me off the ceiling...
man am I getting impatient (ok, I am anyway)...it is WAY too early to test, even with the ultra early test and I am fighting off jumping the gun...which I want to do sooooooo bad....sheesh
and this head cold...man I so hate head colds...starting to cough now too...YUCK
if I AM NOT pregnant at this point I am going to be rather irritated...I WANT ANOTHER BABY!!! I have prayed for God to bless me with what is best and just go for it.....no charting no nothing, but there have been signs of cycling...spotting at the start of the month, lots of gooey (ok, almost downright yucky) sticky cm around Valentines day...loads of :sex: fun at the same time...getting hormonal, crying at the drop of a hat (I mean really bad), light cramping, upset tummy at night (like last time) and now I popped a tums this am...I am tired, but that could be cuz I am not sleeping well, but not usually THIS tired...
did you know I used to hate tums??? now they are almost like candy, that isn't a good thing!
right now I don't care if it is a boy or a girl...yeah, want a girl, but still.......I JUST WANT ANOTHER ONE!
I must be crazy
oh yeah, and Mark leaves for 4 days to NY tomorrow at 510 BLEEPING AM
he will die for that one, I hate mornings and now I have to find a babysitter...my regular one is going to Spokane, gotta ask Mom...*sigh*
wow....I've made 4 pages! hmmmm
well, Brian and I both have full blown head colds...I am going nuts...I really have no idea if I actually AM preg or not, and I do want to be, but have all but talked myself out of it....not having a good day either....head cold from hell, my poor baby...my poor gooey baby, ICK...got quite a bit of it under control with Motrin cold and mine with Drixoral Cold...took some Zinc and C and will see if that helps or not
Mark is in NY, and that certainly isn't helping either...really missed him today, esp after we got so little sleep last night...he has an abhorance for flying and got maybe 1.5 hrs sleep last night, I maybe got 2.5 and had to take him to the airport at 3:30...had a REALLY GOOD friend of mine that was up and offered to come over (she has big problems sleeping) so I "got" to take him in...damn but I never liked putting anyone on a plane, but I did notice the total desperation from my past wasn't there...I felt pretty sorry for him, he all but had an anxiety attack at one point, but we got him off...I really hate his job now.....I agree with him, I think it is a total waste of $$, but they thought he should be there, maybe this is a test...
and had an interesting day as well....I did manage to get some more sleep...Brian slept til 8 something so I got another 3 hrs sleep, and took a nap when he took his am nap...but also spilled the apples and blueberries on the floor...yeah, I said blueberries...that sh!t doesn't want to come out either....oh, like I am shocked...no, I didn't spill the stuff that DOES come out, I did the damn blueberries....*sigh* at least I got the dining room steam cleaned, then our bathroom when Brian went to sleep, so I DID get SOMETHING accomplished....trying to make arrangements with Mom so she can take him til tomorrow eve and I can do the couch and the living room floor....fun, eh? ah well, is something I wanted to do while Mark was gone and NOT underfoot...which I am still convinced he would be....
and got most of the week planned...Mon Mom is coming over so I can get the nail thing done (and we will do lunch) and she can take Brian home...Liz offered to come over to help (same 3:30 friend!), and then later in the eve when Brian is good and worn out, ready to sleep, I will go get him so he isn't crawling/walking etc all over the wet floor (yeah, gotta plan something this simple now, peachy)...Tues got the babysitter coming back over so I can do a few more things, Weds is a mad house cleaning whirlwind and at 11 something Weds night, I go get Mark...this should be interesting, I never liked sleeping alone, still don't and won't be surprised if I don't sleep much...talked to him and he sounds about the same...he is miserable, poor guy....
so that is my whine fest...I am coughing up a lung and need to go get SOMETHING...thinking the tea I have been downing sounds pretty darn good...still gotta straighten the kitchen up, take a shower and clean up a couple of things I totally let go in my pouting...I hate it when I make my life interesting...but enough whining
I am tired and better get going...
I test Weds or Thurs am....should wait longer but this is KILLING me!! I am so impatient....I could go in and pester my dr for a blood test but I refuse to go to the dr with this head cold...he might give me more meds :shock: :nono:
Mom is due in an hr or so and I can't wait for her to get here...she has NO CLUE of any of my suspicions and I am not about to tell her (long story, not going into it) for quite awhile anyway....altho I have slipped and told her we were trying :roll: silly silly Cindy! UG
but I am going to get my nails done and we are going out to lunch....that part I am pretty excited about
however she is also taking Brian home and suddenly that part I DON"T like...man I miss Mark bad...I even missed his snoring last night....ya wake up in the middle of the night to listen to him and there is only the fan
yuck, I can't wait for Weds.....maybe I will have something to tell him :party:
he did say NOT to wait!
ohoh, and Brian DID go thru a big growth spurt...he fits right nicely into his somewhat big 2's now :shock:
WOW, WHAT A BIG BIG BOY...
oh my but I love that man....he was literally hovering over the phone waiting for me to call, and then we talk for almost an hr about.....drum roll.....NOTHING....he did sounds so good...I miss him...I hope this isn't a habit with the bosses...this sucks
will be home day after tomorrow...Brian has done an almost Dadadadadad and totally abandoned Mama for now...is ok, I miss him too son...
and got the carpet all shampooed, and the couch, and his chair too...feeling pretty good about it...got the babysitter coming tomorrow...WAS going to burn more tumbleweeds but turns out it is raining outside! WTH IS THAT??? THIS IS A DESSERT!!!!!!! ah well, got plenty of other stuff to do, so no problem, just gotta pick one...and Brian loves his "girlfriend"....she comes over and holds and plays with him during period breaks at the games.....
and gonna have to post some great hockey player pics...we did goody gang and got to hand out the three stars...and our goalie knows us and Brian and I have this fantastic pic...gonna have to get that one signed...he skated up for the first star and his reaction was "I haven't seen him in awhile, he is getting so big!!" or something to that effect and Jeff snapped the pic....Jeff would be the ams photographer...I took a puter class with him (what a waste, he and I agree on that one) and he also took our wedding pics!! I can remember when I asked him to do the pics, he is like...um....er....wellllll....I can't do it for free...
I laughed and said of course not!
he took the greatest pics...he burned like 12 or 13 rolls and gave them to us....very reasonable price, we have the negatives AND we didn't have to choose from a package, we got them ALL...
so anyway, I should get some sleep...Brian has been awake a couple times and complaining but is more a sleep thing...strange, he doesn't usually do this! and I shouldn't get too far off the schedule...Mark will be home SOON!
only one line...damn, now I am depressed...trying to stay up for Mark's arrival, but am now really having a hard time getting focused to clean the house and finish the laundry room (or get any more done)
I am trying to tell myself it is just too early, but it isn't, and I know it...maybe I no longer have 28 day cycles, but I know it isn't...or maybe I am just NOT cycling yet
that bites....considering a Dec Baby...not sure if I am all that thrilled about it, but......
he is in the air...has been for about 15 or 20 mins...on his way home...am trying my very best to get things back to "normal"...got the disaster that happened in the laundry room cleaned up (am taping and mudding it, text is next YUCK)...got the kitchen done, now on to the rest...carpet looks WONDERFUL still...Brian is fed and tap dancing on my last raw nerve
had a thought, what if I am a one child shot? not that Brian isn't everything I had hoped for and more, I just figured we did one this right, why not do a second just as right? hormones are in full swing...thinking af is just around the corner to haunt me
ok, that was supposed to say only one line on the test...bfn...peachy
Mark is home safe and sound, af showed up last night (fun, eh?)...lovely isn't it? feeling downright nasty to boot...life is grand
at least Mark is home...he is having a nasty time of it at work, only getting worse, but at least he is home
for now...who knows about next week...I hate his job, and so does he....it isn't a good thing either...I told him not to wait til things got like they did with the last job before he starts looking for another job...
life in a hotel room sucks, esp with a toddler with a double ear infection, head cold (that is FINALLY STARTING TO CLEAR UP!), NO computer, and I don't really know anyone here...got to meet Shannon tho, she too is from the tricities and we sorta hit it off pretty well...she might be lurking or joining here soon, she is due in may! and WOW, she is skinny! I envy her...really I do...oh well, not enough to diet tho... :nono:
we are headed to MT this weekend, and home to pack more stuff next and maybe make an attempt to move, but gotta talk to Mark's boss first...got a great house sitter on very short notice
Brian is turning in to quite the lil minor bird, mimicing everything and has learned to flush the toilet...we aren't having that bad a time other than a lil clausterphobia and missing the pets pretty bad but overall I can still convince myself it is an adventure
and with that I gotta run, Brian is tired...
and Kym, go to the Bon when they are having a mattress sale, they have great buys, but I am thinking you are talking the whole thing, right? hope the board is going ok, I don't even have time to check on anything!!! I MISS MY PUTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I miss my house too!)
ah yes, the joys of not being home...this is so NOT a vacation! but at least we are in a HOUSE and not that motel room (which is NOT that bad btw)...at this point I don't really care I live in a mobile home, I just want to be IN it! I want to GO HOME! so does Mark...ID Falls isn't that bad tho, I had best get used to it...I see a fight coming over where we are going to stay too...we are NOT going to be in an apt, and that is pretty final...I am not interested in negotiating that at this point...I want my pets, I want a small garden and I can't have either in an apt...YUCK...I HATE APTS!!!! I REFUSE!
so then Mark's boss hands down the decree that we WILL be living on the W side of ID Falls...well, butt head, unless you are pony-ing up the $$ for one of those spendy houses, we will damn well live where we please! this is NOT a tyranny, and you are NOT a dictator...
and my flowers...my beautiful flowers...that are blooming a good 8 hours away from where I am!! that SUCKETH! I spent all that $$ on bulbs and time and effort so I could have flowers, not so they can beautify a house I can't be in! the butt expects Mark to be a weekend father, not a chance in hell...Mark told him that ages ago, and he didn't listen...well listen now ass, that isn't going to happen...Mark doesn't even have much (if you call it much at all) experience in tanks...and you made him to be an expert...sheesh...can we say LOOSER! ug...stuck in a motel room with not much to do and a toddler that misses his doggy's, his Grandparents, his bed and his yard time!
but back to a better note...I need to talk it up so it isn't so bad for me right? *sigh* at least I am with Mark, and the area isn't all bad...went to the Nazerine church and met a few folks...typical Nazerine's, they are extremely friendly! gotta love it, am hoping to make a MOPS group Thurs...I almost can't wait, maybe I can grow to love ID Falls, who knows
and we are headed home next weekend...gotta go pick up a zillion things provided we have a house to put them in...we have a 3 week grace period, which we can handle no problem...I think...think if I could get settled into a house of our own we would be so much better...both of us miss our bed, our tv, the puters, the pets, the the the...and I can always plant plants wherever I am, right? I am pretty good at it!
ok, gotta go check out houses online in ID Falls, want to have some to look at this coming week...need SOMETHING to do!
stupid puter...had a post, lost it cuz the stupid thing locked on me AGAIN...I hate Mark's puter! anyway, was a bit of rambling, a bit of information...came reading my journal to see if I could figure out when I should next test...couldn't find a thing...bad bad Cindy forgot to put THAT in her journal (hey, maybe I was distracted!)
found the information FINALLY in a pm I sent (yes Kym, to you! so glad I did, was easier to find that way!)
Posted: 26 Feb 2004 13:21
Subject: Re: Well........
yeah I did, no I am not...af is here this morning 2 days early...a part of me is trying to hold out hope this is implantation, but more likely at least I am cycling and af is here
was the post, so looks like I should test.....maybe last week??? OMG! and I just peed...now that was STUPID!
will have to wait til later anyway...Brian is about to pass out and they haven't cleaned the room yet...so I gotta go find the maid and have her come back after lunch...SORRY :shock: damn, he is all but asleep in his toy box, gotta run :roll: will drink something so I have to pee soon...Don't worry Kym, you WILL most likely be the first to know! am determined to surprise Mark this time and that way will NOT BE on the phone!
only got one line....nope, but on the other hand, I DIDN'T use first morning pee, I had to use pop-induced stuff...ew, that is tmi even for me...YUCK
not gonna give up...might test again tomorrow...IF I get another test...which I don't want to have to go get...think I will wait a couple days to see if she shows......and get the last test from home :roll:
have got to stop getting my hopes up...this is pathetic!
oh fun, she showed tonight...half a day early...this should really make moving so much more fun
started today feeling hormonal and a lil off, has progressed into feeling totally overwhelmed, pissed off, tired and feeling downright nasty
and tomorrow we head home, Fri I pack like mad, AFTER I go get 1/4 beef, get a perm in the afternoon, pack more like mad, start loading it up and hopefully by Sat night we are ready to go
and the Ams (yes Kym, HOCKEY) are up over Portland 2-0 in game 3 of a 2-1 series (cunfuzed yet?) it means we have played 3 games so far (best of 7), won 2, winning this game 2-0 and it is looking really good we will win it
and I hope we loose in Portland Fri cuz then we get to watch a game on Sat!!! AND we would be goody gang!!! but I would want a Sat win then...won't be stressed if they win in Portland, bummed a lil, but...I wanna watch some hockey!!! too bad Portland is so far...
oh yeah, here is something good, last night my house sitter calls and asks if it is ok if her Mom checks in on things as she has to check into the hospital...turns out she has blacked out a few times as a result of excessive bleeding from her delivery mid-JANUARY...she may have to have a hysterectomy at 33...fun fun, eh? she is worried about the animals, I am like HOW ABOUT YOU?? I don't care THAT much about the animals (ok, by comparison) and between her Mom and my folks is just fine! I am so not worried about THAT aspect of it!
speaking of which, I gotta get ahold of her Mom and ask her how Liz IS doing!
THEY WON! still can't get ahold of Liz's Mom...too early to call now...got a MOPS thing to go to, looks like I might be a lil late (not worried about it)
got most of the "extra" stuff out to storage last night...this place is so much less cluttered...got a bed last night, looks like it will be nicer than the one we have, which is REALLY nice anyway! slept the sleep of the dead...both of us actually...the alarm went off even this am...can we say wine cooler?? oh YUMMMMMMMMMMMMM
damn sulfites tho, got a tad of a headache...the motel living is all but over...soon we will be home, I can check on my flowers, my pets and friends and family in person
that should be nice! WA here we come (ok, in 9 hrs, not that am counting, right?)
and I gotta remember to uncheck the siggy....*sigh*
got just about everything out...except the puter, the pack n play and some stuff in the dryer...fun, had to do an emergency bloody wash...am flowing pretty heavy and no pads...how fun is that? will make it to the store as soon as Brian wakes up...was going to go after the mops meeting, thought I had it under control then...*sigh*, guess not...so now I DO have to go shopping...Brian was NOT cooperating tho, and I wasn't about to take him in anywhere except where he could sleep!
damn the wench...I am not a laundry queen (ok, don't want to be!) and all my soap and stuff was packed of course...went and got the box o stuff from the laundrymat here at the motel...af right after the shot and after a baby can be MESSY! yucky yucky yucky
tmi, I know, but I am venting here...I hate it...AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG
so, now that that is out of my system, at least we ARE going home, and at least we AREN'T going to be living out of a motel room anymore :party:
gonna bring lots o stuff up...still think the 2 truck deal would work best...and we are going to a town that has GOOD stores! GOOD prices! YA KNOW, HOME!
*sigh* at least we have some decent furniture now...I was afraid of what we would find...spent more than I was planning, but got way more than what we paid for...so not going to complain too much and Mark is ok with it (or so he says)
so, with that, I have one more load to take out to the truck, other than the puter.....so I think I will go get a cart thing...load it all up and be ready to jet when Brian gets up...will get him lunch and we are OUTTA HERE!
oh yeah, and Mark won't be early as planned, might even be a few mins late :cry:
so now we have 5.5 to 6 hrs and counting...oh well, it is going fast...
OMG I hate Idaho!!!!! Mark hit it on the head yesterday, just about everyone around here is here for the job, only for the job, and can't wait to go home! home is almost always several hrs away as well!! YUCK...and 10 hrs in a truck with the grump and the toddler AND 2 dogs is enough to make anyone just totally nuts! SOMEBODY PLEASE SHOOT ME!
AND, to top things off, was going to meet the goddess Nadine in Boise, but that didn't work out, and his grumpy ass wasn't in the mood for exploring...granted we got in late, and his mood NEVER improved, still....we had to stop SOMEWHERE...Boise would have been RIGHT NICE! ah well, we will be back thru in a bit...next time we won't be hauling a trailer and can be doing a nice 80+ mph
and then, this am...too much fun...I am going to kill Katie (the dog)...she has YET AGAIN pooped in her kennel...told his grumpyness I was going to find her a different home if this kept up, I am sick and tired of it, I am not at all interested in putting up with it...and I have absolutely NO clue what her problem is...she has had her shots, wormed...will give her some yogurt later, but still, this is so old! she was holding it just find over the last week...not that we will go over the week previous etc, but I am NOT going to deal with this ANYMORE!
and the lovely fight last night...peachy...damn I hate it when he refuses to listen...he has developed an extreme selective hearing problem...he ONLY hears what he wants....I was starting to think maybe he WAS right and I hadn't said them, so I asked a third party...nope, I said it....I am right, he is WRONG...I DID say it...I refuse to roll over again and pretend everything is fine...if he doesn't want to listen, or if he makes the concience decision to ignore me, FINE AND DANDY, expect the pbfh to show up...I can be hormonal, and a lil practice here and there is good
men, can't live with them, can't stab them repeatedly, can't yell at them when the baby is asleep either :roll: I just want my dh back, ya all can have this ass....I don't want HIM...I just want the other one back!
*sigh* not sure today of all days is a good day to make a journal entry...not a good day emotionally at all
raining outside too, and that certainly isn't helping...Good God I hate Idaho...didn't think I would, but I do...intensely too...I am meeting neat folks here, but it just isn't working for me no matter how much I am trying to make it...nicer home too...and it isn't Mark's house, it is much more mine...but with the stress we are both under, we are fighting again...fun, eh? I actually yelled at him...mind you, I raise my voice now and then, but that is so much different than me yelling...Brian was asleep...I hissed "WHAT" at him and he made some surprised noise, and I saw red and just let it out...let me tell you it wasn't a scream, but it was getting there...all because he is developing a very very severe selective hearing problem
I dont deal with that, he knows it, and is learning to pay more attention
sometimes....he can't figure out what I am so angry about...I feel like a bad Mom...I yell at Brian more now too and that bothers me, but SHEESH that child REFUSES to listen to me...and swatting the bottom, what good is that? I never ever would, but I am starting to understand why folks shake kids...they have no understanding of danger and you just want to shake them and tell them you could get HURT! he refuses to give me ANY attention sometimes...I reached out and grabbed him by the arm the other day (and the overalls, what a wonderful invention) right before he tumbled down the stairs...the ones he opened the gate to get too (ok, it isn't a real gate, but...) and all this after I told him no several times
and time outs in his bed??? oh yeah, like that ever works...I feel so guilty listening to him cry, which lasts like 5 mins or less, and he is asleep unless he just woke up, then he listens a LITTLE more...
and I think I want another one?? what am I, a masochist?
I long to get out, to have Mom come over so I can go play for a couple of hours and not worry about it, I long for an overnight date, the one where you have wake the neighborhood and let them know just how GOOD sex can be...dinner w/o Brian no, Brian SIT DOWN, Brian eat this, Brian Brian Brian
I would say af is here or I am hormonal...pregnant? I would be totally shocked and amazed if I managed that one...and I must admit that I gives me so much pleasure when he does THE SAME THING to his Dad
however, when we have company he is all but a perfect angel...he was today, we had the neighbors from church over for dinner and that was fantastic...we live in such a cliquish city (gotta say how amazed I am at how totally closed off they really are), if you aren’t Mormon around here, it can be rough
however, on the up side, the neighbors 2 or 3 doors down are from the Nazarine church! Totally amazes me, and Janette is such a great lady…our immediate neighbors are pretty nice too (and they ARE Mormon, surprised me a bit too) we had burgers with them Friday…neither Mark or I are good with names tho, and I couldn’t tell you anything OTHER than Bailey’s Mom :roll:
ah well, I really am trying my best to make things better…not sure what to do from here…keep wondering and worrying about being pregnant and that could be why I am having problems…oh yeah, that would CERTAINLY take the cake wouldn’t it!
ah well, I need to get another load of wash going…sitting here wallowing in my misery isn’t helping any!
aha...figuring out the hormonal bit...af is due here in a few days...like tues or weds...how much fun is that (sarcasm)
ah well, looks like we won't be going to church this am...Brian is asleep and no signs of waking (he has like 15 mins to do so, I DO NOT wake him for anything short of the house on fire)
got wash done, folded, Mark emptied the dishwasher, intent on watching tv now...fine, something he can do well and ALONE...I am sick of tv already
guess I should go get dressed the rest of the way, it IS 10...I want more caffienne...alcohol would be nice too, but I don't want what I have, not interested in getting much else either...just not motivated
I should motivate myself out to my small flower garden area, maybe pot some plants...more plants...ya know, do SOMETHING
the wicked wench of the west showed her ugly face this morning...a weird face, but face nonetheless
peachy, I am stressing out, and that could most definately account for it being weird, but I am sick and tired of seeing one measily line...been feeling weird this month, but that could easily just be me psyching myself out...I SUPPOSE I could be pregnant, but I am pretty sure I am not
*sigh* I will most likely test in a few days if she doesn't show more normally...I DID have a period last time too...I know I know, whine whine whine...moan complain whine...not sure if I am trying to talk myself into it or out of it
another Jan baby...oh yeah, wasn't I going to avoid that?
is raining outside too...altho today I am not feeling as bad as yesterday (normal for the wench being here) and at least we aren't fighting...found out for sure the folks are coming in a week.5 so that will be nice (I think.....will have to see how Dad does!)...they both miss Brian (oh yeah, guess us too!) and Dad has the long change thing (like 6 or 7 days off) so they will spend it here, and we will probably go back home the following weekend...am really looking forward to having them here too
oh yeah, and gotta make some calls...been bad on ebay so I really need to get OFF the puter...lest I get into more trouble...but they are just SO DARN PRETTY!
well, things seem to be slowly improving...I don't feel so awful anymore, altho I still ache in places, it isn't as bad as it was last week...AND my folks will be here Weds night, AND I got some quilting done too! I mean ACTUAL quilting, not just putting the top together, I actually SEWED my sandwich...ok, I sewed ON it...need to get back at it today...got things about where I wanted and even figured out the pattern I wanted on the border and how to quilt it as well...too cool! Mark isn't sure what to think, but he is thinking...had a bit of a blowout this weekend and think we may actually have accomplished some imparting of information....ok, blowout is like saying the Titanic hit a bit of an iceberg :roll: Good God I had fighting, but I can't just sit and be complacent either...I am no doormat, at least he doesn't have to guess about what I am feeling
so, by Sun night we pretty much decided to let things go, he understood why I was so upset and what I meant, I was finally listened too (mostly what I wanted anyway)....Mon we walked on eggs
and Katie (the abused border collie) has been waking up in the middle of the night barking...like at 4:30ish...might be the paper delivery, we dont' know but I really thought Mark was gonna kill her...two nights in a row and been barking at night off and on for about a week...SHE thought he was gonna kill her...he gets downstairs and she has done BOTH jobs in her kennel...no runs, she was outside RIGHT before she went to bed (when we do at 10ish)...there IS no excuse for that! been giving her yogurt to ensure no runs as well, who knows, maybe I am giving her too much food, but she has had off again on again problems and had lost more wt than I thought was good...altho vt tech didn't say anything with shots/wormer/weigh in...maybe I shouldn't worry about it too much, but still....WILL be cutting back on her food, and she WILL be wearing a muzzle tonight (can still stick her tongue out so am not too worried about it, but we NEED our sleep!)
one good thing tho, being up that early inspired Mark so I guess the fighting is officially over, right :sex: is welcome at any time of the day or night!
been quite a dry spell for me tho...I just need....MORE....I know with all the stress it just hasn't been that high a priority, but still...I was even reminiscing...something I extremely rarely do...the past was never that....I dunno, satisfying...I mean, I did O but not like I do with Mark
but sometimes, sex is just....NEEDED...is a great stress reliever ya know
so anyway, gotta go check the boy...sounds like he might be awake and I don't want to wait until he gets upset to get him up...guess today will be a well caffinated day...I am already woozy!
oh yeah, af did come on full force, and because I have been feeling so weird for what, 2 weeks? I tested anyway...bfn...*sigh* one of these days I WILL quit wasting tests!
still working on getting my old yahoo id back...if anyone has me on their list (and reads this) and sees lady_ghostess on yahoo, please im me! I am sure my old list is gone....
if the don't give it back to me, I am still the_ghostess :roll: guess I can live with that if I ABSOLUTELY have too!
and the visit with the folks went well
OMG IT JUST LET ME IN!!!!! I am once again lady_ghostess at yahoo! and nothing has been changed ANYWHERE!!! not mail. not lists....I am so happy I could...hm...sing? dance? okokok, doing happy dance now!
where was I?? folks were here this weekend and we had good time together...even Dad was on his best behavior :roll: altho we did take him to a junk store AND the army surplus...army surplus my butt...half or more has NOTHING to do with army...what is this purple stuff? so you can blend into San Fran? RIGHT! but, still, even tho my lil grumpasaurus is teething (not sure if the count is 2, 4 or 6...looked like 6 at one point! and with 3 or 4 adults to herd, hey, it worked and well! we had lunch out and that was good (Sizzler)...but they left Sat instead of Sun :cry:
oh well, I did understand...Dad was so tired after the drive and he had to go to work Mon (needed the day to rest up) and being that we make that drive, as much as I wanted them to stay, I DID understand!
and the dogs...oh my...they have been pretty darn good...even Katie! a lil barky still, but no more kennel accidents...water is running on the lawn as well, and it is finally warm outside! goign to take Brian out soon too
and did some more work on the quilt...in fact got the applique stuff all cut out
found out that might not have been what I was supposed to do, but hey! it looks really good and I really hope to have it done for the weekend when we go home...it was a grad gift for a friend of mine (who, um...er...graduated a couple years ago!)
she will love it and I have so little left to do, I am so excited...so, the spring blues seem to be pretty much gone
now, MAYBE...I can get pregnant! :party:
geez, one has to have sex in order to get pregnant...I should just attack him :roll:
*sigh* I know I know, he is still worried about...EVERYTHING...but I still WANT MY HUSBAND
and now, back to our regularly scheduled programing
we are headed back to WA this weekend...oh thrills, another 2 10 hr drives (and maybe more Sees candy! or maybe not.....) I saw a box of it watching American Chopper the other day...Paul Jr was chowing down on it...couldn't see a thing and I said, HEY!!!! I KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!!! and Mark goes, ya never know and I am like YEAH RIGHT!!
so, when the lid is put back down, guess what it says :twisted:....sometimes it is good to be right and so notedly so
so anyway, I gotta go get some packing done, some cleaning done, more laundry, and, of course, change the boy and get him dressed...so we can "assault" the world for the day...oh yeah, and gotta go get a pizza too, guess who has been convinced eating BEFORE we leave is a good thing :roll: and he ACTUALLY acknowledged I was RIGHT
again, sometimes.......it feels soooooooooo good
and I didn't even have to say a thing...I just looked at him and nodded and he said, I know I know, you were RIGHT!
oh boy that felt good...NEENER NEENER NEENER!!!
and Kym, I ment what I said....until you can't remember your own name!! she doesn't matter...YOU are the Mama now and YOU need to do what is best for YOUR family...screw her!
wow, what a way to end a mother's day! :sex: before bed and then again in the morning...I could get used to this early "rising"
hey, who am I to complain??? it was GOOD! :party:
had a good trip home...got to see my cats (who are getting so fat), my flowers (that are going gang busters and so beautiful :cry: ), my friends, my folks, and I didn't have to cook one thing, or wash one load of laundry all weekend
however, today I do :roll: ah well, back to life...and for today it is going GREAT! what a way to start a day...need to do this more often
oh now this is fun...it is 6:49 am and I have been up an hour...got up twice last night with the screaming meemee and I am POOPED
and yet, I can't go back to sleep...ain't life grand?
ah well.....just a wild guess, but I am betting the teeth are back with a vengance...oh fun...not sticking my fingers in there unless he shows def signs of cooperation...Mark got bit pretty good last time he wanted to check and with me being this tired.....I think not!
on the better side tho...I have been working on the grape quilt for a friend of mine...looks like it should be finished SOON...need to pester Jules for some tips and tricks later on, but I am so excited...can get started on the sunbonnet sue maybe as soon as next week :party:
willing to guess that with next week tho, will come warmer weather and I will want to be outside more...
oh yeah, it is trying to snow again...have I mentioned lately I hate Idaho with a PASSION! YUCKIE!!!
and Mark is having mega trouble with his tendons again...still all swelled up, and us 9 hrs from the dr's office...get to call the hmo today and see who up here to see, it is killing him...swollen and angry looking (which I didn't realize it was that bad, he hasn't been letting me I think!) so we should have a fun and exciting weekend ahead of us :roll:
oh yeah, and I made smothered chicken last night...actually had the chick boobs and saute'd them with onions and garlic powder, then removed the boobs, did a quick saute of the mushrooms, put them over the top with some cheese...OMG that was sooooooooooooooo good! not sure I could do it again tho :? I rarely manage to NOT overcook them...just managed it yesterday! had it over rice...mmmmmmmm...with a salad...ok, the chicken was REALLY good!
and can you tell I am tired??? still jazzed over stupid chicken...maybe I should try for a quick nap...Brian has been sleeping til 8, if I went in now, I MIGHT get an hour...most likely not, but it doesn't sound like a bad idea.....might just give it a shot
poor Mark, no wonder he hasn't been interested...amazes me he is still walking!
well, Mark has some nasty tendonitis...and he is one moody pia...to top it off, af shows up Sat am VERY early and of course, I am unprepared, had a mess to clean up...NOT a good thing....kinda kills the day entirely...then, of course, being the pbfh that I am, EVERYTHING I do is psycho and I am ATTACKING him...yeah, HIM yelling at ME is MY attacking HIM...bite me dough boy...YOU are going psycho, and until THAT MOMENT I wasn't feeling PSYCHOTIC at all, however, now that you mention it, I am sure I can manage a nice hissy fit ARG!!!
so WWIII is back on....let the squirmishes begin...I am going to start with the next volley, we are having MY comfort food for dinner tonight...chicken a la king...he is ok at best with it...tomorrow will be lasagna but only cuz I don't want my sghetti to go bad...then hamburgers cuz I LIKE THEM, and he can kiss my not quite so lily white, er...bottom (been tanning)
said volley will be accompanied by a few trips to the tannery this week, during which HE can watch the lil terrorist and I can RELAX...
but on to some better news, I am about to finish my first quilt...actually finish it!!! I have plenty of STARTED ones, but nothing finished...I was told I needed to finish a (couple) (translation one) before I start another one
gonna bind it today, so I need to get off here....sides, Mom and Dad will be here this weekend for a day on their way to KS so I probably should clean things up too (not that dirty, but still, gotta make nice for the folks! make them think I am the Goddess I actually am :roll: )
Urg…nothing quite as irritating as this charting thing…irritating I tell you
Hey, at least I am DOING it…not that I do it exactly the same time every am…like yesterday, Brian was up 3 times in the night, last time right before I was supposed to temp…UG…so, managed to get an early am nap, took it after that (ok, long nap, took it very late….peachy) but hey, I did take it! haven’t forgot yet…
And then there was this afternoon…went to Joann’s to get a specialty iron (quilting stuff, so I can actually be MORE boring than I already am, ya know :roll: ), was rather irritated at the price so I didn’t get one…left the diaper bag in the cart, went two doors down to get Mark, remembered it, went back…all less than 5 mins…it is gone…guess where my wallet is? And the check book? Got the debit card canceled, but that was my ONLY source of cash here and now it is GONE…had to shut off Mark’s too…..how fun is that? So, now I am also stuck at home (no drivers license either) so much for it being a nice town…at least we are headed back this weekend…hopefully we can get new cards by the time we get there…either that or I get to have Liz overnight them to us…peachy…I feel like a total and complete idiot....stupid stupid stupid….*sigh*
So, at least we can save a few bucks…Mark DOES have his credit card, so we should be able to make it home and for the week (ok, 4 days of the week), other than milk…oh fun…maybe we will open an account here, after all we do have checks still…might just go ahead and change banks anyway….the one we have we couldn’t get anyone on the phone, even to cancel the debit…means we had to call Visa to do it…at least I don’t carry credit cards…Mark has those, they get me into trouble :twisted:
So anyway…oh yeah, and no more ebay either *SIGH*
And I wanted a walking foot at least….will have to see….can’t get that online, I don’t have a name machine, think is a short throw Singer knock off….know where to get my stuff tho…want a new quilting machine (hey, a Whites is on sale at Joanns!!) but don’t NEED one or can really justify one so……will have to see if I can get the other one up here…it is an ancient whites, but, can easily get feet for it!
And, still having thunderstorms here…heard until Weds…whine whine whine
Hey, the officer was kinda cute! Brian thought he was cool too….so many things to touch, so many nono’s…he laughed and said his daughter was the same way…sounds like about the same age…really nice guy, lives just down around the corner…pretty cool I think!
So, that is MY whine fest…better go get something figured out for dinner…maybe I can cajole dinner out…oh wait, how would we pay for it :roll:
another day, another dollar
went out yesterday to get a replacement for the lost diaper bag and wallet...was actually depressing...didn't get the wallet I wanted cuz they no longer had it *sigh*...got a bag, which is cute, but not my old one...I know I know, whine whine whine...just another slap in the face...stupid me leaving the bag behind :? I chalk it up to stress, so basically it is all Mark's fault, right :roll: :!: wrong...oh well
and I got a call today...really nice guy too...two Sun's ago we went to church and they had a guest speaker (I vaguely remember something said the week(s) before)...a really good one too on Creation vs Evolution...I was very much impressed, as was Mark...so impressed that I bought a book and gave for the love offering (what little I had)...they had one of those paper credit card swipe things on it...and on a whim I wrote our ID # on it...I would love to have a chance to sit and talk to him (his name is Mike Riddle), but didn't think much else about it...
until today, when a Jerry called...evidently Mike and his wife had mailed all the slips to their office, it got there this week...did I mention I had everything that was in my wallet canceled? shock of all shocks, it didn't go thru :oops: so I can't pay over the phone, I don't have a replacement yet...get to mail him one...peachy
altho I haven't read the book yet, I knew the folks were coming up and that they would really like it, and with them traveling.....would have the time to go over it, so I saved it for them...is on its way to KS (yes, thru all the storms, Dad could always pick the best time to go! )
so anyway, Mark is due at the Dr's, Brian is asleep, and I am bored only cuz I am not working on my list of things to do...I am currently on strike :twisted: ....just not motivated, altho I NEED to get going...I hate the insane Thurs when I do next to nothing
altho the :laundry: queen still resides here...so I guess I could go fold something...oh yeah, and the officer that took the report has been driving by off and on...that was nice...IS nice...
I want Sees Candy....ya know, make me fat(ter)...oh yeah, and some really good guac, or even just avacados and tomatoes...mmmmmmmm but that sounds soooooooooo good...and something spicy too...and :sex: , I want it all don't I
think we are going out to Mexican tonight, I can feed my Black Irish cravings (huh? what does ONE have to do with the other??)...wish I WAS preg, at least I could blame my Spring cravings on SOMETHING...*sigh*
OH HEY! on an up note, Mark's card still works...am terribly afraid of driving w/o my license, but the officer said to tell them my WA # and that it had been stolen, (and I assume, be pretty, flustered, very respectful and polite and possibly flattering) and it most likely won't even be an issue
I haven't driven this cautiously or this good in ages...I hate being good...no one else is *WAH*
BUT on the other hand, yesterday I decided screw it and went out anyway...didn't get into trouble, was GOING to get groceries but Brian fell asleep and I just came home...ah well...going back out today....am INCOGNITO
OH YEAH, and on a different note...sometimes I envy those whose life is interesting enough to need a private journal...on others, it is so refreshing to know I am so boring too...but I just looked at the #'s of who reads this thing, and WOWZA! 900+ who are you all? I know Kym is one, and a few others, but now ya all have my curiosity up! what on earth made you decide to follow my, er...interesting ( ) life?
ACK! I need to REMEMBER to uncheck the siggy! GEEZ, one would be led to think I am, like, blonde or somethin!
*sigh* this charting thing can also prove to be a heartbreaker...if I AM preg this month, I am due Feb 19 (I think), if I am not, I am much more likely to be devastated...I mean, after all, I really am watching things, Mark really has been...er...ATTENTIVE :lol:, charting and all and according to the chart, we SHOULD HAVE hit it...
yeah yeah, I know, it isn't foolproof (or we wouldn't have ttc 2+ boards)
but still.....EVERYONE has been teasing Mark about a lil girl...I don't even have too anymore :roll:
and we had a pretty good weekend...we came home early (Sun night) cuz it is soooooooooooooooo much easier to travel when the grumpasauraus is asleep...and he was showing signs of not being a good traveler, so we got in at around 4 am...YUCK...we rested today, did just about next to nothing...boy did THAT feel good...at this house that is def doable...AND I got a ton of things finished at home...we got all the replacement stuff taken care of from the stolen diaper bag...everyone got to their resp dr's apt...I got quite a bit of the pasture mowed (way more than I thought I could! :party: and had a real blast doing it...pulled a zillion weeds, got my hair permed...went out to lunch at Olive Garden (OMG that was FANTASTIC!), Mark got to spend time with his first son, we had a good dinner with plenty of company and that too was pretty darn good...
got to see Brian's g/f from hockey (merrick, the world's greatest puck bunny j/k) and heard all about her victim, er...love interest...and I TOTALLY condone the age difference (she is 21)...she will most likely babysit for us again when we return for the week...
and overall, we had a really good time! we helped Liz move her new furniture as well, and that wasn't TOO bad...when we drove in at 3am Fri morning, we saw ROSES...and not WEED AMONG THEM!!!! she refuses pay...that is ok, I know what I am going to do, she can't resist me :twisted:
I gotta say, we haven't had that productive/fun a weekend in many many many moons, and it felt GOOD!
and dang, if this is all cuz of that B shot, BRING THEM ON! yowza but they hurt, but I feel sooooooo good! still even...nice
okokok, back to life...gotta figure out SOMETHING for dinner *sigh*
OMG, my sciatic (sp?) nerve is firing off the last couple of days...bad enough today that my knee and ankle aches, AND my stomach is upset...labor was easier to take than this!
and then this storm moves in...could explain the knee and ankle...and it was pretty warm outside today, so I don't understand what it's problems is :cry: I just want it to go away already!
at least I got some sleep last night...Brian finally slept thru the night...he has been just barely waking up (enough to cry, but not enough to really wake up)...and then forgot to put the sheets in the dryer so now we wait to go to bed...oh yeah, and Mark has to go to work tomorrow :roll:
good news tho, Mom and Dad are here until Sat am when they roll for home...on their way back from KS...and more good news, the ac at the house in WA is working correctly, and the water "problem" Liz had this morning most likely was from too many hoses on so everything is set :party:
can't wait til July......even tho I am really in love with this house, I am still not at all impressed with the area....ah well....got to show the neighbor lady my flowers...I do have pics to post as soon as I upload them.....I should do that tomorrow, after all, I sorta have someone to watch Brian for a few! oh yeah, and gotta go pick up the pics from Sears as well...fun fun fun
so, on the heels of "good news" comes bad...no, the ac isn't working on a regular basis...and no the water still isn't working...had a really good conversation with Liz's Mom tho, and found a partner in crime in getting her paid one way or another :twisted:
and since Dad is home, he is supposed to go check it out...will see if he has time...I might head home alone with Brian and the dogs (oh yeah, that'll be fun, NOT) but gonna wait and see what happens...the ac guy is supposed to call me later on today (will see about that one), and Mom as well
had a pretty laid back weekend after the folks went home...they made it back safe and sound, and good they didn't stay longer...af is due soon and I am decending into my normal hormonal hell...tested 10 dpo and either was tooooo early or more likely I am not preg...it was bfn... :cry:
and I am going to kill something...probably one of the dogs, they are already on my sh!t list...one for being a pia the other for licking the carpet (not bad until it turns to chewing)...Brian brought me Cooper (aka booboo) and I started to cry...blamo...and I am breaking out...too much fun, I hate af, wish it were just over at this point...I feel like a bleeping teenager...
oh yeah, and to top things off, from my Jan post:
ug...more Monday fun...been qwest customers for not quite two years and that is about 6 months way too long...they have been screwing with us ever since Jan/Feb and I won't have any more of it...never been late on a payment, and got it and sent it and now they are telling us it is late...BULL PUCKY...and she tells me there is NO grace period, and I told HER that if you shut it off we will be moving elsewhere and that a customer based service shouldn't be using AUTOMATED calling, and then when the rep answers the phone from the "press 0" said rep knows NOTHING about why I got a bleeping autocall...and how we have had nothing but problems, how we have overages cuz I was TOLD to shut off my no-roaming feature, and then told not ALL roaming was non-chargable and and and and and that the check had been sent out Fri or Sat
and she said I wasn't letting her finish...so I said, ok, you said there was NO grace period, ARE YOU GOING TO SHUT OFF MY PHONE? and she said, um...I don't know, I can only enter in what you told me
so I called Mark, he put the bill in probably Sat after mail came :roll: and it would have went out today (as far as he can remember)
I don't care...we want out of qwest...is about time anyway :shrug:
so, I MIGHT have my cell shut off, and qwest MIGHT be under the silly impression I would be at all inclined to pay early termination fees...
this is just pathetic...I hate qwest...have been screwed enough by them, NEVER TOUCH QWEST!! they don't even have very competitive plans...THEY SUCKETH!
anyone have any suggestions? they have to have coverage in MT AND in WA and in ID (at least for now)...qwest has shut off their MT coverage...was why we went with them in the first place
*sigh* I liked it so much better when I really didn't have anything that unusual to post
oh yeah, and Brian has at least 3 more teeth coming in...I am going on strike...as soon as I can :roll:
well, I am not preg...af made her appearance this am and this is just pretty damn depressing...did everything right, and I am not going to chart one more f'ing thing...I HATE charting...with a PASSION
never remember, it is all over the place even when I DO remember to take it on time....even Mark was helpful this month
so, I am on a diet, looking for a treadmill, gonna road trip today if I can (Brian permitting)...got some good snuggle time in with him...with his room being painted his blinds are down and it was pretty bright in there...he was twitching like mad, and when I shut his window his eyes popped open so I picked him up and he did the limp noodle thing so I took him to bed with me, hoping to be able go back to sleep myself...I have been so extremely tired I was very much hoping this was it...but no, just me :angry4:, no such luck...we snuggled for a bit and I made him all comfy in our bed and he is crashed happily...he likes our bed (too bad the lil bugger assault sleeps, he could sleep with us if he didn't!)
so, on the agenda for today is to check the paint in the garage (to finish his room), look around for a reasonable ( ) treadmill and roadtrip...maybe paint a lil, Brian dependant
and thinking of stepping down as host, every board I host is dead or dying...don't need that, someone else who is better could do so much more I am sure
af is such a wonderful thing :angry2: I might just have to kill someone. feels like I haven't slept in days, mostly cuz I am NOT sleeping well! yesterday was a really good day, a pretty high high kind of day, today is a murderous one :angry4: I was suposed to be the one napping with Brian, instead, I am up, Brian is in his crib and the butt of the house is in bed. I made plans for today cuz lately he has wanted to get out and then doesn't, so today he was acting like I was forceably dragging him across the county(s)
am about to head out, BY MYSELF...oh yeah, and I ran the ad for my Ranger, it is officially for sale starting tomorrow :cry: I loved that truck, really I did...I really hate to see it go, but since it isn't just me anymore, and we can ONLY fit two in there, it just isn't doable. he still has his focus, I really don't want to hear about it. I should just shut the tv off and head out, w/o saying anything. poor boy, would have to take care of Brian
oh wait, sounds like the poor boy just got awakened by ds, how very sad grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
way too cute...we are in bed, listening to him talk to his crib. quietly. the quiet part is not unusual for the morning, but quiet is becoming a thing of the past. every now and then you can hear him jumping in the crib, I taught him that cuz it was just tooooooooooooooo darn cute not too! so I asked Mark if he wants me to bring him in and he said SURE, so I went in and got him. was hoping to have plenty of "quality" time playing around in bed. he did for a little bit. Daddy asked him to give Mama a kiss and amazingly enough HE DID IT!!! open slobbery kisses and I started giggling, and said KISS DADDY...AND HE DID! so now all three of us are giggling and the two adults are quickly running risk of being bitten, and the tickling is on it didn't last all that long, but one thing is for sure
my baby is gone, he is a little boy now. he loves to jabber at EVERYTHING and it gets louder and louder and louder...even G-ma can hear him on the phone...he understands most of what you say...unless, of course he is being naughty. his fav word is ba. it stands for just about everything. ba-byeeeeeeeee stands for so many things: airplane (goes bye bye), Daddy coming home (WAS bye bye I guess) ball is bababababa, sheep says ba, doggies are ba altho sometimes they are DG or dada (they love the ball)
but he has a version of airplane he will say on occasion, I have heard numnum (also mumumum), he has a word for truck altho I am not sure I know which sound he is trying out for it yet, he loves to point at them. oh yeah, cows say ba too (what a riot!)...guess the local dairy that have sheep also have him confused
and for right now, he is up playing with Dad. aaaaaaawaaaaaaawaaaaaawaaaaaaaAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAARRRRRRRAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRAWEARRRRRRRRR as he chases Ali around the couch.
and soon he will most likely wind down some...is getting close to nap time.
isn't life grand? mood swings, ya gotta love the upswing part!
HEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEE YOU MAY NOOOOOOOOOOT!
BRIAN YOU MANY NOT (bite the dog, assault the dog, eat the grass, pull on the dogs tail/foot, lick the doggie's food bowl, play in the doggie water, touch Daddy's puter OR mine)
NO TOUCHING, do you want to go to bed/get a swat?
AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG BRIAN NO! NONONONONO
why is it I don't seem to have many positive conversations with my son? WHY?? WHY WHY WHY?
AND WHY do I have this INSANE urge to constantly repeat myself? ACK!
and after getting into nono's, then he cuddles with Mom for a few, gets bored and is not headed upstairs...think he is closing in on his am nap! I dread the day when he doesn't need one! I NEED him to NEED ONE! oh man but isn't he just the cutest child! we are gonna nick him screetch soon *sigh* for the most part, that is still pretty darn cute, but I can see it getting old eventually
and I have some good news....seems the many thousands we thought we were going to have to spend getting the water and ac fixed aren't going to be near as spendy as we thought...were thinking we might have to drill a new well, that'd cost over 3k, thought a new ac unit would be 4k+ and we were trying to figure out if we should waste our savings or get a loan and were also figuring no truck.....turns out that isn't the case at all! AND to top it off, turns out Mark overpaid on taxes....we still paid way too much, but hey, that totally unexpected IRS check not only made BOTH our days, I deafened Mom when I opened it (I was on the phone with her when I did :roll: )
I screeched...ah well, I had hired a sitter for some Mom time and at least I didn't show him how to REALLY scream! we were both so pleased we went out to dinner....to Applebees...glad Mark likes them, I am not at all thrilled with them anymore...you CAN'T overcook chicken that way, is nasty...they USED to have really good chick fajitas, but not anymore.....like Chiles, but Mark doesn't.....next time, we go Mexican! at least Sol Rio here has good food we BOTH like....oh yeah, so does Jakers but they are soooooooooooooooooo spendy...went to Remo's on Sat and that was pretty spendy as well, but that was our night out and we hadn't splurged like that in ages....
so all in all, we have had a really good last few days! who knows, maybe I will get some soon
oh yeah, and looks like we are headed to MT this weekend...Mark's Dad is in the hospital...he has cancer and his body didn't react well to the chemo AT ALL...he is recovering slowly, but doing better and the cancer is still in the beginning stages...I said we might go on condition of both Mom and Dad, but Mark announced yesterday we were GOING...so I said I would call Mom tonight and we will go from there...she just sent us a positive email yesterday saying Dad was doing better, so we most likely WILL go...oh fun, another road trip
but hey! Mom and I can take the boy and go SHOPPING, and Dad and G-pa can sit and yak and nap.......works for me! AND SIDES, I am SURE Mom needs a break
truely tho, I don't want to overdo it with G-pa and Brian.....we will see how it all goes...and we need to find a dogsitter for the girls.....there is a kennel here I think we can leave them for the weekend...will ahve to see
ok, I am off...need to go play with the boy...oh my but he is growing up so fast...and honestly, it is pretty fun to watch!
and NOW, he is in bed with a swat or two...lil bugger was BACK in the kennel AGAIN! AAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGG
patting her bowl with his paci, and that is why I know where he is! I AM SITTING RIGHT HERE!!!!! takes him like 1.5 secs to run in there and get into trouble, I had just tickled him! WHAT IS IT WITH THE KENNELS???
Ali is hungary enough she was still in there...hmmmmmm, that is rather rare....he was sitting on her too....*sigh* ah well, he is asleep....I should sew something!
now I have that song going thru my head "bad boys bad boys!" I have this mental picture..that and Brian woke up in a rather good mood...talkative as ever and being a good.......er, mostly good boy...which is subject to change I am sure
guess we are headed to MT this weekend....Mark's Dad has cancer and is having a rather difficult time dealing with the after effects of ONE chemo dose...I am not sure what to think of the whole thing...to be honest I don't really get that this is the end (and no, I am no psychic, just get the occasional odd feeling *tries not to break into the "feelings" song*)
am feeling downright weird too...very tired, (very) and can't seem to catch up on my sleep, even tho in theory I should be fine...guess I am not getting enough excersise (like chasing my lil man isn't enough)...if I hadn't taken the test, then had af show up, be weird AGAIN, I would swear I was preg, but alas, no...temps are still down...still not charting, not gonna sweat it this time around.....just watching for a temp spike
oh yeah, and got some good :sex: last night...not great, but good...was playing around (non sexual) and being silly and amazingly enough it did the trick...he said he loves it when I was that silly...no details, I am NOT going to embarrass my self! (no Kym, not even YOU! :rotf: my lil secret!)
so anyway, I am sitting here, listening to Brian probably empty the pan drawers out thinking I should head upstairs...*sigh*
ah well, it was good while it lasted! "BRIAN!!! NONO"
TOO EASY!! hey, maybe I don't have a secret and was just baiting you? :nono: can you tell I need more sleep? hey, at least I got you to journal EARLY!
ah well, you will never know! :roll:
hey, I even shaved last night! doesn't smooth sexy legs make :sex: that much better? I mean you don't have to worry about the porcupine effect :shock: :rotf:
so, really and truely, is it going to kill you if you don't know? you will be disapointed I am sure! I might be willing to pm it too ya or im it to ya
I have this mental image I can't dispell....I saw this black and white old old file clip one time with a woman with pasties on and the pasties had tassles on them....and she was swinging the tassles in opposing circles...I thought she was VERY talented
any chance this is your "talent"??? hmmmmmm? did I mention my mental pic?
here is to the many varieties of "talents" we all have
may it get us LOTS of action!
more like I WANTED a carrot, but since you can't wait 8 MEASELY DAYS!!! :cry:
this is just too much fun for one morning!
:googly: there, now we are even for you posting in MY journal!!!
I am comin, I am comin, quit buggin!!
I see everyone has sex on the Brain today, too bad I can't get it more irl.....
maybe I should borrow Kym's new "boy toy"
ug...another road trip...to MT...how fun :roll:
probably the same thing I got Sat night???
hey, you aren't the ONLY one getting some
ok, for a change.......