well, we decided to go to the fair Saturday morning. the day was beautiful. Alex was being an angel. Brian was at G-ma's and out of diapers :roll: that'll be the last time Mark packs him to go :doh: so, off we go. we stop by see Red and give G-ma plenty of diapers and zoom to Yakima. tried to call Robin but understandably she wasn't answering her phone (busy I imagine is still an understatement!)....Mark decides we are going to lunch before we get there. let me translate for ya: honey, wanna go to Sea Galley and have a prime rib sand?? OH BABY that is good stuff! I didn't do the philly this time, Alex has been having problems the last couple nights and I wasn't gonna push it but holy moly that was ONE GOOD SANDWICH
and I was good, we split a salad and drank tea, I had already had a can of DP :slap: and then off to the fair we went. it wasn't bad, but it wasn't any different. I had wanted to take Brian but he DIDN'T want to leave G-ma *sigh* we saw mamy things we regreted not taking him to see. sheesh
and then Mark's bone spurs started acting up, and my sciatic nerve was too. not fun but not so bad that we didn't finish walkign thigns down. Alex was an angel. got so see some great looking stuff, some oh I wish stuff, and some what the h...? is that sort of stuff
bought a shake and headed home. shake didn't sit so well, too fast? too much sugar?? too tired? dunno, I slept 30 of the 45 min trip to Mom's. felt better some, but still soooooooo tired. damn, I had wanted to go shopping! Robin, I can STILL be persuaded to come on up ya know wanna go to the Avenue (?? I think) and the mall to check out some nursing shirts.
so anyhow, today we got a few things done. dug some bulbs that are in desperate need of thinning (Robin, want some dwarf iris??) I have a ton of em. they are overtakign the thyme I have in there and I would RATHER have the creeping thyme then iris that don't bloom cuz they are over crowded and not getting enough sun :doh:
got my peonies transplanted and some starts for a good friend of mine. now I need to plant the bulbs I bought and go get more thyme but that would mean not as many beads :nono:
and I came in to grab lunch, check mail, harrass Mark and bring Brian in the house and Mark and I have a conversation on who C is. ya know, as opposed to typing his whole name out...Mark says ok, so why not DH?? and I said cuz we are all too lazy, there is C and M and another C and and and and....sides, C isn't always dear heart, cometimes dh is d-head. told him but that was ok, cuz I rarely called him d-ead, if I was mad he was just an a$$
so he asked me if I refered to him as TA. have I mentioned he has a very nice tight a$$?? oh man I about died. he is TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO funny sometimes. and when he is in a good mood and we have both had a good amount of sleep, got a few things done, he is a riot. glad things are finally settling down. the stress of the remodeling and the outlaying of $$ was hard on him, I am just pretty darn proud of him taking it "like a man" instead of getting petty and inspiring me to want to inflict bodily harm on him
man, this is nice. some days life really sucks. some days it doesn't. for today it doesn't, and that is pretty darn nice. I love not living the soap opera I used too. it wasn't nice. I love boring. it means so much less stress. that is NICE
so, R honey, I desire a nice boring winter for ya. no more d-head to worry about but a nice boring day in day out no stress winter.
oh yeah, and as I check mail, Brian PASSES OUT on the couch. NO binkie, no lunch, just out cold! poor guy has been go go go lately. he was so cute, and Mark had JUST asked him if he was ready to go to bed
"NO, NOT tired!"
dang my boys are beautiful. and being so young I can call them that. handsome yes, and later on I will get used to using that term.
oh yeah, and cut Red's hair last night. he wasn't at all thrilled with it but was happy to go play in the bath afterwards
I love that kid. doesn't get much cuter then that ya know. I love the "terrible two's", you get to watch them learn. yeah, he def has his moments, but overall it isn't THAT terrible!
Happy birthday Grandma. today would have been her 87th birthday. I still miss you so much, and you would so love my boys. my red headed boys. the only great grandchildren that have it, just like Grandpa's. wish I could visit, a dream would do, really...I am glad you aren't still stuck here like it was but still, I long to give you a hug and a kiss. hear about when you were working in the packing shed when I was born. to go out to lunch
so Mom and I are going to your fav place....I love the Mex food too, but it won't be the same w/o you
oh dear God I am raw this am. the boys slept in for me but I wake up and know G-ma isn't here. it is always so raw on this day. I suspect it won't get a ton better. I don't expect Mark to do much as I have a really good idea he knows how raw I am. Brian is being an ass too and that does help. my lil red headed terror. at least Alex is in a good mood (more or less)
damn I really thought it would be getting better. I just want today to be over with already
so, for my birthday we go to Spokane to see a hockey game, and it SUCKED big time. the boys forgot how to play hockey I guess. it was LAME. shots on goal were like 32-19 half thru the 3rd. Merrick, they were EMBARRASSING...they were SO BAD we ACTUALLY discussed not getting season tickets next year!
they may be here to stay, but they certainly didn't play!
ON THE OTHER HAND, I did get to meet Kathleen :woohoo: the kids were quite a handful, but we did get to chat a lil. and Manito Park was BEAUTIFUL, even if they are gearing up for winter. the roses were gorgeous. makes me want to get more
didn't sleep much last night either. not no sleep, but not good at all. got to shop too. got a couple nursing shirts, ANOTHER set of lilypadz...those things aren't worth the $$ but Mark said to go for it...hopefully I won't have to buy any more. they are only SUPPOSED to last a couple months. what a crock of hooey. $20 and they last 2 months?!?!?!?! GEEZ
but I also got 2 nursing shirts. they don't LOOK like nursing shirts, and I can wear them after I stop nursing too. no Sees tho :cry: and I REALLY wanted some. is ok, I can order it online :party:
and Kathleen and I said we would make plans to just catch up next time. maybe when her dh has time off and we can go do family stuff. she wasn't at all what I was expecting. cute lil petite thing, I was VERY surprised when she was that much shorter then I was :roll: and Emma was cute as a bug. K was saying how much she looks like her Daddy and I could see that, but I saw here too. they both have GORGEOUS big brown eyes that are SO expressive! and of course the two 2 yr olds were running amuck.
so it was a more or less good time, altho I doubt we will go any more away Ams games. I am so hoping they don't suck this bad all season or we won't be going to home games either. and now we are stuck with 4, YEAH FOUR!! tickets. I am so tired of the "young just wait til next year" attitude. we didn't pay an obscene amount of $ to go watch a half a$$ed attempt at play. nut up boys, play or get off the ice. Sat night's game was just an embarrassment!
wow, what a weird/good/bad few days! not feelign great, but been oversugaring so I imagine that would do it. I need tea, been drinking unlead Dr Pepper
damn that is good stuff! *cry*
and Brian has been major swinging between total a$$ and angel. he is fantastic for me PT in the am and REFUSES pm, and still poops in his pants ACK! :blowup:
and yesterday we went to Walmart, as in all 4 of us. that was SUPREMELY stupid. Mark didn't really wanna go and I really didn't wanna take Alex. he went but suffice to say we won't be doign THAT again anytime soon...a$$hole...subsequently the boys were angels :roll: went to pay for it and had to use the credit card. this remodeling has really sucked all the life from the checking, and heavon forbid we touch savings
we aren't discussing that yet, OR the fact that some of the "missing" $ from the account has gone to beads
speaking of which, Mark has a coworker that was sorta interested in what I could make so I worked up a musical one for her. she LOVES that thing and paid what I asked :shock: it did take more then I usually put in for time, and it does have obsidian stones...I did charge more for it and I still think she got it for cheap. on the other hand, I SOLD ANOTHER ONE! it is gorgeous too and I did get pics (ok, I scanned it) and dumped it into my bucket. don't think I have made anything that ISN'T scanned or pic'd somewhere.
and she wants to see more :woohoo: and Mark is going to take some samples in to work one of these days
damn, I need a SMALL briefcase
oh yeah, and I am getting mailed to me....drum roll...
wait for it
someone is going to kill me
BUT I so love doing this
so in a lil over a month I am going to do a bazaar. working on getting help too, think I at least have someone to do the bazaar WITH me!
but, oh......wait.......there is MORE
DON'T YA REALLY HATE IT WHEN I DO THIS??
a friend of mine is just about to open a Consignment Bridal Boutique :shock: and we have an apt to meet Monday (tentative, no time yet, am tho) so she can see what she wants to display for me
OMG OMG OMG OMG
guess I had best get me a tax id #. this is getting serious! Mark and I are also discussing making me a workroom maybe in or off the garage :shock:
dang, things are going good. not all good, but way more good then bad right now
now if I can just find a live in babysitter naw, can't do that :doh:
well, the boys are back to letting me sleep.....AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH HEAVEN! :roll:
been getting a bunch of pieces made. looks pretty darn good too! I need to burn a bunch of pics onto cd and take them in, have them printed out, make me a binder
and my boys....OMG, I so love those two sometimes (ya know, when I don't want to strangle em!)....Brian is getting to the point of PT and doing pretty good, altho still NO pooping in the toilet :doh: his most recent thing (to get Mommy up FAST in the am, move etc) is to announce MOMMY GOTTA GO POTTY! in his best loud big boy voice. good thing we aren't in public much :shock: altho he DID do it at the game the other day, they are loud anyhow, that doesn't count
and he talks TO you now, not just magpie's what you say back. we have quite the conversation (usually about passing trucks, tractors etc) when we go places. and he likes his window DOWN...and will ask quite nicely...was driving around yesterday with it down and he was just so tickled. I rolled it up just before the 55 mph and he sighed and said "thank you Mommy for the window down!" then he giggles and says, WINDOW UP! of course, his brother was trying to sleep, but what else would ya expect?
and Alex. my lil laugh boy. I so envied my sister her happy laughing daughter. not just the daughter part, but the fact that she laughed at EVERYTHING...so does Alex and he giggles and laughs on occasion too. how cute is that? ya ask him, "SHOW ME THE DIMPLES??!!" and he gives ya this huge open mouthed grin. oh yeah, no teeth, good for checking that too and he reaches for me now, he is getting so big so fast!
and Mark is turning a corner as well. we are actually talking about thigns, and it is going pretty well so far. what a wonderful change from the past! he is a bit testy, understandable, but he is behind me getting the jewelry "business" going.
oh yeah, was supposed to meet up with Jana, it didn't work, so was supposed to do a puter conference, didn't happen...not surprised, I knew it was too good to be true. did talk to her a lil yesterday tho and the shop seems to be doing well. good for her. would be nice for her to reciprocate all the help I have given her in the past tho. in retrospect tho, I must have been smoking something exceedingly good if I thought it would work that way
well, off for more beading. Mom is headed over to watch the boys, we are going to go get her linoleum, deliver it, have lunch, more beading (not in that order) and VOILA! I am already 1/4 to my goal if not more. and it won't take long to get more either :woohoo:
gotta run, they are both complaining!
having a contest on the anything board, go check it out!
gonna upload (ok, try) some new stuff into the bucket! gotta run
ack, but before I do that......the PT war is still on, not sure who is winning :doh: this am, he peed once in his Big Boy Pants (underwear) so I put a trainer on him
he pooped in it, and cuz he didn't want to get caught with it, he took it off, and yup, you got it....spread lil nuggets all over the floor
hey, at least they were easy to pick up :blowup: EW
can I get off this ride? I have plenty to post and NO TIME to post it. I am a jeweling fool....I have an all of a sudden how fast can you do it? show coming up FRIDAY AND SATURDAY, and still the bazaar. Jana and her partner REALLY love the pieces I showed them. and i have no time to DO them
EEK! off to make more, I am really pleased with what I am turning out tho, but also running out of supplies...Mark is now onboard and I am making BIG bead buys. not gonna be here on time. stressed. pleased. almost had an anxiety attack a couple times, but it is looking FABULOUS
and Merrick, THANKS GIRLFRIEND...all this wouldn't have happened if you hadn't watched the boys Friday. you are a GODSEND :bighug: wanna move in?
OH MY...closing in on my trial by fire. today Liz is coming over to help make display stuff. that's right, LIZ! she came over Weds night and we had a ball. she was a tad goofy but so much fun (we were both a lil slap happy from lack of sleep)...she left at 10, but we got lots of earrings done...in fact I ended up running out of ear wires. got em yesterday, got more earrings done. plenty of sets done. as always need more. bucket is filling up pretty quick too. even I am impressed with some of it :roll:
anyhow, like I said....fire trial tomorrow. it will be a definative make or break, preparation for the bazaar in Nov. even if I only sell a few pieces, say $100-200 it will be a hit. but if NOTHING sells, I am so screwed. not only cuz Mark will put a stop to it, but I won't be able to justify to myself the expenditure. we are most likely talking at LEAST a couple k right now. and I am fast running out of just about everything. I HATE shopping at Craft Warehouse and Michaels. esp now that I know what wholesale is and where to get it! the bulk group buys I found online are fantastic but so addictive. I still need to send out the winning pieces from the contest. but on the other hand, OMG I am really happy with what I have.
Liz is supposed to come over first thing this morning. I am really counting on her help today, altho if it does fall thru I won't be at all surprised, just......sad. she really is a riot, and I REALLY enjoy her company. the kids get together and last time they played pretty good, considering Brian still doesn't know how to share...they ended up LITERALLY doing laps around the living room chasing each other. Cody is a yr older then Brian and Hannah a yr younger. Brian LOVES his toys too Cody is rather fond of Brian's stuff as well :doh: causes a few problems, but we can deal with that. he will chant "GO TO CODY'S 'OUSE" if we get close to where her old apt is....she is due to move here shortly to her new apt (stayign with her parents til it is avail) and there is NO WAY in hell I am going to subject the boys to her Dad. but....still....she has been a really good friend for awhile. wish we could spend more time together, but.....it doesn't always happen.
and my husband....Mark too has really supported me thru all of this. he is my creative help when I need it and he does have a good eye for stuff. I love that man. I couldn't ask for a better husband. ok, I could but I seriously doubt I could find one! I know I wanna strangle him sometimes, but he is a faithful and loving husband and father. he does dishes ok, seriously, HE DOES DISHES
I should try to go back to sleep...but I am really psyched this am. so off to work I go
and I am going to start my day with Cocoa Puffs. no heerios this am...I am going to be BAD...I want chocolate! off to be creative and productive :party:
:bighug: I love ya girl!
luv ya too Robin! :hi: miss talkin to ya too :bighug:
now for my bitchfest
I might have to kill him. no, not Brian, MARK! this whole weekend he either is regretting turning 50 (he does that on Halloween ya know) OR he isn't feeling well. let's just say Liz left in tears tonight, cuz he couldn't handle Alex crying. what a crock of sh!t. I mean really, we ARE trying to get ready for the bazaar. we weren't fartin around, kwim? we DID spend the day at the folk's place having FANTASTIC Prime Rib and fixin's...our oven is out til we get parts so we go where the is a working oven. man I am getting that PR thing down. better then Sea Galley's is too might add! but does that do anything for him? NOPE.....just in ass mode. he wants a Mustang. isn't that nice? a 30k car that we maybe could afford if he did x y and z but he basically refuses
what a crock....I get so sick of his pouting. and I see the fight coming. he is itching for it..."all he wants" is what I am going to hear, followed by "all I spend"
damn, Christmas isn't gonna be a good one unles the bazaar goes FANTASTIC, and with the economy being in the dumps with the gas prices being what they are
Christmas is gonna suck. I should move now while I am behind, and before he mack trucks me
I hate this. a$$hole
eek...so much to do, so little time, but hey, at least progress is being made! for the bazaar Liz and I are also making lap blankets, fleece no less and they are SO warm....Liz fringes the top and bottom and they are really cute too! I don't care for the all around fringe so I sew the sides up. and even for taller people (LIKE ME!) they don't stop just short of the feet. nice anyhow, been getting those done. doesn't take long, but it does take. still wanting to get a bunch of flannel cut to cloth diaper size and offer to sell baby chuck blankets. that and breastfeeding blanket thingies I use with Alex in public. have had a zillion folks ask about it, maybe make a few? shouldnt' take much!
and my jewelry. getting several shipments in (not sure, 3? 4?) in the next few days. gonna make more chandelier earrings, have some FABULOUS parts coming and can't wait to get my fingers on em :roll:
but I do need to get back to being creative, or at least making more of what I have. fun, NOT *SIGH*
and Mark never did melt down. ok, yet. I have til the 19th to get this all done, and I am 99% sure I can make it. no sweat! ok, lots of sweat.
hey, even if it isn't a success I am having a BLAST bead buying. ya know, I could make up a few kits to sell as well. not a bad idea dang, that would mean MORE BEADS
Girl, where is this Bizzare? I think I went to it a few years ago.... was it at that TRAC place and is it a Christmas type bizzare??
(((HUGS))) I hope you are having fun with this! I love ya and miss talking with you!
miss talkin to ya too babe!
and the Bazaar is at the Columbia Community Church (the huge church on Gage on your way to Cosco) the same day the Coliseum does their Christmas memory thing. Trac does one too, but not sure on what date? nope, not going to trac, that would be WAY spendy :roll: let's just say I am not spending near that...is my first try and I didn't want to blow several hundred on entry fees :nono:
HE DID IT! Alex just rolled all the way over, and then again! from back to front, then back again :woohoo:
is all downhill from now too, I know :roll:
and eating...if it ain't the boob he is REALLY sure, he DOESN'T want it. just like his Dad a boob man
ALEX! What a big boy! Time for baby proofing mama! YAY!!!!
oh yeah...he rolls til he gets stuck now, and squaks when he gets there. he also doesnt wanna be snuggled into anymore, he wants to see what is going on, and the pets and his brother warrant special attention.
and to boot his gums are bumpy....my baby is growing up so fast....on one hand I still love watching him do it, on the other, he is my last child, I wish he would slow down now and then
oh yeah, and the hair is still getting redder. he is just so darn beautiful. I can still say that...he won't correct me on that for a couple yrs
well, just a quick update. I am "officially" a business woman, as in I now have my domain name and my UBI/MBL taken care of, now all I need to do is go grab a webspace (which I might do thru godaddy, but gotta talk to Mark first :roll: ) and register in the city...what a crock...stupid city
I have made some new stuff. I do rather like some of it, is really pretty and going to be hard to part with
and the beads are rolling in. and they are GORGEOUS
and I am now on high bp meds too.....fun....I actually remember to take them now and then :? ACK
and I need to find me a new babysitter....Brian's g/f got herself a great new job and for some reason (40 hr weeks maybe ) can't make it out on Fri anymore. so glad she is working, esp where it seems she has found her niche, but DANG, we SO need a sitter now....will work it out one way or another I guess.....
so anyway, I had better get back at jeweling.....so many pretties, bazaar bearing down on us like Winter in the Arctic.....better get at it!
dang, I spent a ton of time on this and I dont like it! I think it needs SOMETHING...whatcha think??? be brutal. be honest. no back patting, PLEASE help me fix it!
I have so much to say, and no time to say it with, no matter how fast I actually type. bazaar is looming and I feel totally unprepared. I hate this feeling
got some great stuff tho, a catalog of sorts, a banner ordered, and set up is tomorrow afternoon. Mark is headed home early to help watch the boys, but mostly is catch up stuff right now. Dear God, what have I got myself into?!?!?!?!?!
what a night. I didn't touch her tho, and I didn't run her down with the truck. and right after the hockey game too. dumb B!TCH almost ran Brian over in her rush to get out of her f*cking parking spot. her damn truck rolls forward a few inches. never mind she wasn't going to get out of her space any time soon, it was packed. never mind she can't park and was at a pretty good angle in her spot (and thus VERY close to us) and all I was trying to do is get him out of the cold and out of her way, but NO, she pulls forward. I freaked out. she is lucky I didn't haul her massively fat and ugly a$$ out and beat her. what I DID do is yell (oh yeah, she heard me) and slap the side of her truck as I pushed Brian up against the truck and try to protect him with my body. OMG the things that ran thru my head. I am trying to figure out where I can put him QUICKLY to keep him safe, and next thing I know the B!TCH comes around the front of the car on her f*cking cell phone. let me tell you, yes, dispatch heard me. knowing she was not driving I grabbed Brian and hauled him (now bawling) into the truck where Mark grabbed him and got him in. I smacked the door shut and recommenced yelling information for the dispatch, like F150 2004 SUPERCREW, YOU ALMOST HIT MY SON
I finally got in the truck (at Mark's urging, he thought I was going to kill her, I might have). and it finally dawns on me that AHA! I TOO HAVE A CELL PHONE
dispatch knew right away who I was. interesting :roll:
Mark was just trying to keep me IN the truck at that point, and we were told to wait for the cops to arrive. the officer asked her what was going on, then came over and I told him she damn near ran him over. he went back to talk to her and she left. not at all sure what he told her, don't really care either, but then he came over and said that everything was going to be let go. the other officer (we ended up with like 4 of them there, 2 from the Coliseum) said he would have broken a window had she done that to his kid.
damn I wanted to lay hands on her. right after I hauled Brian in the car and closed it, I looked down. there lay his binky. OMG that has me crying now. had me freaked out totally yesterday. all I can remember is the news story of the lil kid that was hit and the shoes were left in the road. Brian does NOT give up his binky for ANYONE. and there it lay. was a late night last night too. and all at a hockey game. yeah, we aren't violent
ok, most of the time
but you mess with my kid, and I will put on quite a show it seems
Mark kept me sane. I can't believe how violent I became so fast. the rage, the fear. the out of control. he said, hey, you did right, you protected your son. try to let it go. I still want to hurt her. she better not catch me at a game. Mark will have to restrain me, and I will let the whole world know what a dumb sh!t she is. damn cow
I know I had something to say, I just can't remember what I was going to say. frustrating
one thing I am working on is another bazaar. will find out tomorrow, but that wasn't it. opened this darn window this morning, and didn't find that out til this evening
damn blonde moments are ganging up on me. I need MORE SLEEP. hey, at least the house is looking better. got some things rearranged too
AHA! I remember
I have made MYSELF some bracelets. they are NOT for sale. I REALLY like them. I even made some more musical anklets. am now out of bells, which really sucks, but I can get more locally :party: wanna make me a blue one and a black one. :woohoo: and beads are fun again
and I need to restock on some of the earring findings. wow, they are cool, make really pretty and really fast pieces that seem to sell. almost instant gratification, doesn't get much better then that
this is for Robin :bighug: who is STILL invited for Turkey, WITH her family! Mom would be thrilled, she grew up one of 5 kids and a "crowd" is what we all love
This is for your entire life.
( ) Crashed a friend's car
( ) stolen a car
(X) been in love
(X) been dumped
( ) shoplifted ..
(X) been fired
(X) been in a fist fight (OK, I was, she was busy pulling hair)
(X) snuck out of your parent's house
(X) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
(X) gone on a blind date
(X) lied to a friend
(X) skipped school
( ) seen someone die
(X) been to Canada
( ) been to Mexico
(X) been on a plane
( ) purposely set a part of yourself on fire
( ) eaten sushi
( ) been skiing - snow, not water (water yes, snow no)
(X) met someone from the internet (married someone from the internet)
(X) been at a concert
(X) taken painkillers (I am not thrilled with em tho)
(X) love someone or miss someone right now
(X) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go
(X) made a snow angel
(X) had a tea party
(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves
(X) gone sledding
(X) cheated while playing a game (SSHHH!)
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake ID.
(X) watched the sun set
(X) felt an earthquake
(X) slept beneath the stars (it wasn't on purpose)
(X) been tickled
( ) been robbed
(X) been misunderstood
(X) petted a reindeer/goat/kangaroo
( ) won a contest (I never win anything either)
(X) run a red light/stop sign. *SNORT* yeah right
( ) been suspended from school
(X) been in a car crash - only sorta
( ) had braces
(X) felt like an outcast/third person
( ) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(X)danced in the moonlight
(X) liked the way you looked
(X) witnessed a crime
(X ) questioned your heart
(X) been obsessed with post-it notes (you should see my kitchen!)
(X) squished mud through your bare feet.. (OH that feels good!_
( ) been lost...
(X) been on the opposite side of the country
(X) swam in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
( ) cried yourself to sleep (close tho)
(X) played cops and robbers
(X) recently colored with crayons
(X) sang karaoke (I don't usually cop to this ya know)
(X) paid for a meal with only coins (fast food count?)
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls...
(X) laughed until some kind of beverage came
out of your nose
(X) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) danced in the rain
(X) written a letter to Santa Claus .
(X) been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) watched the sun rise with someone you care about (ok, I did at the time)
(X) blown bubbles
( ) made a bonfire on the beach (wish I had tho, workin on it, can't wait to do it with Mark and the boys)
( ) crashed a party
(X) gone roller-skating
(X) had a wish come true
( ) jumped off a bridge
I just want you to know Robin, I don't usually admit to half of these
oh yeah, got another bazaar coming up :doh:
wow, what a great day! Mom got here this am around 9:30-10 and we were were out of here 10:30-45 and off to shopping :woohoo: we did have a good time, and the boys for the most part were really good. went to Olive Garden first, that was good, as usual...went to Sears where the stroller was majorly psycho, needs grease in the wheels, cleaning and selling (most likely), I hate that thing. bought it for a friend of mine, and she just returned it a couple months ago. I can see why (ah well)...went to Sears, but cuz of the stroller problem (and tired boys) we didn't venture to the mall more then that. got me some sweaters, G-ma bought Brian gloves/mittens set, and he loved that...got Alex a hat and gloves as well, and some snowflake lights (OOOOOOO PRETTY) AND did a :nono: and put them on the credit card. I like those things, and I remember why they get me into trouble :angry4: way too easy to use. is why Sears gets me into trouble, I dont' have to have it with me to use it, just my information and my id :roll:
went to Burlington Coat Factory and got the boys some odds and ends, looked at leather coats for me, which was a complete and total flop :cry: found several I LOVED but none that fit. either they are for very large women with very short arms, or they are for women with narrow shoulders, I am neither. ok, I admit, I am fat. honestly, I don't like it but I also don't care enough to change that. of course wt loss isn't going to make my shoulders narrower or my arms much smaller. I am also strong, but doing what I do will do that, kwim? I am STILL built like a sh!t kicker. I did look at the mens stuff, but didn't find a style that went OH WOW, so.....*sigh* no coat. would love to find one and tell Mark to go get it. of course hell hasn't frozen over, and I DON'T want him to spend his precious $ and fight like last yr. he is going to be peeved at me already, cuz I am going to stick that rule to him, but I am going to reupholster his chair (dear God, do you know how much that COSTS? :shock: )
not gonna let him explode like he did, it just isn't going to happen, I don't think our marriage could stand another repeat of last post-Christmas.
but anyhow, I digress. we went SHOPPING!! we had a pretty good time, came home, got a little cleaning done, some laundry (ya know, dent in the always replenished growing pile), swept and mopped the kitchen floor, got all my beads off the table, and Mom and Dad stayed for dinner. Brian was SO thrilled. and when they took off, I had him bribbed and distracted enough that he didn't even notice. I am not his hero but getting there :party:
let him have choc milk in the truck, he was so careful and good with it. gave him plenty of treats, and we were playing with his flash cards when they left. so what if it matters to me that I am the good guy, it works for me :roll:
and with that, I am going to go watch hockey etc with my husband.
oh yeah, and got the confirm from the up coming bazaar. got another one to do and I am not stressing over this one. AND I am hosting a quickie buy on one of my bead boards. this should be rather interesting. honestly, I haven't been this excited or ready for Christmas to get here for years. life, at least for now, is really good!
ok, so I am sitting her bawling my brains out. good thing I can sorta type cuz I can't make out the screen hardly. my son, my beautiful red headed son has herpes all over the inside of his mouth. and I mean ALL OVER. tongue, throat, gums, all over. he has a nasty fever, he is in so much pain. one of us most likely gave it to him thru kissing. Mark has that lovely gift that keeps on giving. he alternates between crying and writhing in pain and sleeping, even moaning in his sleep. took 3 F!CKING DRS TO FIGURE THAT OUT. he is now on acyclovir. I saw it today, finally. honestly I want a divorce. or just to hurt him. I didn't have it before we met. I haven't had an outbreak in yrs, but he has (while preg with Alex)
and now I am deathly afraid Alex will get it as well. what the hell do I do now? today, now, after seeing the label on the bottle, I am trying not to hate him. to me it would be worse for the boys to grow up with single parents and this will pass, or at least I hope it will. I am sure he doesn't even know I am that angry and that he will brush it aside. he also has decided I am not worth listening too
OMG I CAN'T DO THIS....he is sitting on the couch chanting owowowowowOWOWOWOWOW. oh God, what do I do?
it took almost a week for everything to clear out from onset. things started breaking Thurs, Fri wasn't too bad and Mark finally went back to work and stayed there all day. at least he was here and helping out. on the other hand, it scares me to death to think it might put his job in jeopardy, cuz that would mean going BACK to ID. not sure I am willing to do that again, but not gonna say never. am 99% sure I can't do this by myself.
and Mark has NO clue where Brian got his cold sores. he said "he could have got them anywhere"
well, NO dipsh!t, he COULDN'T. I have warned him a couple times NOT to put the binky in his mouth, and last time he gave me a borderline dirty look. silly boy doesn't know how to give a good death look. Brian is already better at it then he is. of course it gets Brian into a heap o trouble.
and if I have to tell him again, I am sure we are going to go around. both of us have been on the edge with Brian not doing so well. and Mark had NO CLUE I was upset with him. :shrug: that's a man for ya I guess :doh:
back to Brian tho, he didn't hardly anything for 5-6 days. we could get a couple bites in him, and then fight for fluids. by Weds night, we could put him in the tub for a bath at night and get him to drink a good bit. worked Thurs night too. Friday night he wasn't near as impressed, esp since it included food, veggies, and he didn't want any of that. BUT, we did get him to drink a smoothie yogurt thing Thurs am. that was really when things started getting a little better. but now I am in the process of making sure he eats. he isn't near as interested in food of the healthy variety. he used to love chicken and now.....not so impressed, and the fight is on. of course, he will eat chips, ice cream and yogurt etc. anything with mega sugar
oh yeah. cookies too. found out one of the meds they had him on is Lortab. yeah, kids vicodin. I wasn't impressed, but it was one of the only things that worked, altho motrin worked on one part, the vic on another, and the acyclovir cleared up the sores. he had 2 on his lower lip and a BUNCH in his mouth. I got glimpses of them. OMG what a mess. poor kid is quite a bit bonier then he was and that so bothers me. but if I can't get him to eat, kids are supposed to be skinny, right? he isn't suffering right now. ok, unless he is in trouble :roll: which for the day he has been a TERROR. the newest threat is asking him if he wants meds. things really calm down in a hurry, he does NOT want meds, and he is REALLY sure.
yesterday he was laughing and playing, today he was pretty much back to his normal self totally. ok, except now he doesn't want to eat much
so life goes back to some semblance of normal. during one of my testier moments a few days ago, Mark got too close to the fangs and claws and I took a swipe at him. reminded him we are NOT exchanging gifts this Christmas, and told him I would take anything he got me back. he gave me a pained look. ya know, that OH SH!T I was hoping she would forget look. he has tried to keep his distance for the most part, until about Friday. I actually let him touch me, and he wanted hugs and kisses. I wanted them, but didn't, kwim? I still can't believe he didn't know how mad I was. we did have a passing conversation about it, so he has an extremely vague idea what is going on. but the words extreme and vague are pretty mild. he lives in lala land some days
Saturday I did my second bazaar. wasn't bad at all really, didn't sell a ton, but I did sell some. there were plenty of others there, but I had the higher end stuff. it showed. not that other's didn't have cute stuff, they did. but the look of glass and plastic doesn't compare to crystal and stone. sold some crystal to my neighbor who seriously drooled over my box. not much. just a few. she also loved Liz's blankets and bought one. sold some of those too. NICE
and now, I feel like kaka. the cold that has been hanging in the wings is hitting with full force. is probably what Brian had to get the whole thing started with a stuffy nose, sore throat, low grade fever and nasty a$$ed headaches. of course, those could also be from lack of sleep, tension, high bp (meds for that, so doubt it) and too much suger, or a combination thereof *EEK* for some reason I haven't been getting much sleep. today I crashed and hard. at least Mark was kind enough to let me. some days he is brilliant, too bad it wasn't more often.
and I had been planning on getting his scanky old chair redone, but it isn't going to happen. it would so piss him off right now, he has out and out said keep the $ spending down, etc etc etc etc
and Alex! wow, my lil boy. the baby is going going almost gone. he rolls all over, has the starts of a scootch, still jumps like mad either in a person's lap or in his excersaucer. he is finally teething. Mark can't feel it. is ok, I can still put my finger in there and I can, feels like he will do 2's like his brother. that's ok, at least for the most part he is easy about it. started chanting dadadadadadadadaaaaaaaaaa the other day and is making all sorts of noised and inflections. zerberts galore, waves, hugs, man he is growing so fast too. hard to carry too far :cry:
and he is still a champion nurser. he wants food now, esp my potatoes made some garlic red mash with a lil cheese tonight and he wolfed them puppies down that's MY boy!
SO, like 2 weeks for Christmas, I still need to mail my sisters package to AK :doh: figure out a gift for Mom and finish things off. am looking for a leather jacket for me, but can't find anything I like that fits my shoulders and long arms. guess fat chicks aren't supposed to be built like me
ah well, men's jackets fit sometimes. but PHOOEY. Burlington had one with a fur colar that was gorgeous
too much to hope for I guess. wish I could go outside and play, but DAMN it is cold out there!
tonight I am going to take a break. warned Mark all about it too. I am going to go grab a hamburger (and fries, and pop, maybe a milkshake!), get my nails done and do some last min Christmas shopping. I wanna be done tonight, or at least pretty damn close. Brian is doing GOOD. eating like a pony, of course, not like a horse cuz he is only a toddler that does my heart a ton of good. and Alex. lil teething terror that he is. Daddy can handle him. after last night Daddy is GOING to handle him! GEEZ
I should go to Red Robin. have me a Jungle Shake. a girly drink. I should get me a limo and go get wasted. yeah, that sounds good :roll:
will have to see if I can get ahold of Liz. she can be a partner in crime. that would be fun, but I know she isn't likely to go. zillion reasons. ah well, is a nice thought at least I am getting OUT
interesting. the other day I was getting ready to shower, Brian walks in :roll: and he gets all silly and announces "MAMA'S NAYKIT!" and starts identifying things. it seems I have a PEENIS! and I said no, girls don't have penis's and he screwed up his lil face trying to digest that one. then he grins and says AWEKS NUM NUMS! NEEPLES!! OMG that kid is too cute *sigh* some days ya just wanna cry and some days ya wanna throttle the lil bugger. he is being extra good. we are back to working on pt and he is doing ok. love that kid
and Alex is growing so fast. he is now in 12-18 mo stuff, mostly cuz his torso is getting SO long. never mind so is his legs, but still, HOLY MOLY. his hair is coming in and the more he gets, the more red it goes. really cool, looks like either another red or a red strawberry blonde. might end up brown, which is just fine by me AS LONG AS he doesn't have my skin tone. poor kid, I don't wish that on anyone :roll:
went shopping Monday night, all alone. SOOOOOOOO nice. had a really bad night Sun night, bad day Monday, I warned Mark ahead of time he was going to be abandoned, and that included dinner. had a guac bacon burger at Carls. those are GOOD. works for me got my nails done, they look......nice enough. had them shortened from last time, they were TOO long but I do like the look. never mind I can't do much with em :doh:
and I did end up at the mall. didn't get much there. more just walking around, which made for much better sleep Monday night ;). Alex was somewhat cooperative for sleep, just had a hell of a time getting there. ah well. last night he wasn't bad but I had a lil problem that has been croppign up the last few days, I get to RUN (do not walk, RUN) to the bathroom :cry:
so anyway, in my weakness yesterday, I emailed Mark and told him I wanted the Koil Kutter for Christmas. I am so going to regret this. no question. having said that, I know what I am getting him for Christmas already, and am going to order it shortly. something for his Mustang. damn that thing is expensive. bet we regret that shortly too.
ah well. come see come saw. I shouldn't complain, I have my truck. wish I had a nice house. would be nice to fit...have some ideas, found that dispite all his whinings when I change thigns around while he is at work it doesn't bother him. we talk it to death for a couple weeks then I just do it and he was happy as a clam he didn't have to do it
gonna hit the back room when Christmas is done. have plans, and part includes getting my table back and moving the jewelry to the desk, which is moving to the living room yadda yadda yadda
I am pushing for an addition. Fri we need to go see what the city is planning for the field next door. looks like they are gearing up for SOMETHING. not going to stress on what that is. BUT IF they are going to put a road thru our prop we ARE moving, and that ISN'T neg, even Mark tentatively agreed to that. will see if he sticks with it.
damn he has me on edge. I hate that. I don't want to hate Christmas, but I am so getting there. too bad we can't go caroling or something. that would be great fun! sledding. that's it, I wish we could take the boys sledding.
I have wander lust something fierce this year. maybe we WILL be headed to CA next yr. that would be fun! spring tho, I remember CA heat. it gets plenty hot enough here, I don't need to head there for that
who knows, maybe it is time for Mark to get serious about job hunting. I wouldn't mind moving out of the area. hate to say that, but................................
ack, I am sitting here being a bit pissy today. HEY, I don't feel good, don't f with me buddy! anyhow, after he pissed me off, I come back here on the puter to check things out. been back over on the anything board. will see how long it takes for me to get entirely disgusted
checking my beady stuff too.....(sigh).....contemplating my sister's gift (ok, trying to figure, make new or out of inventory..........hmmmm)
and I am not wearing my wedding rings. been irritating my callus lately. but I am wearing my new jump ring opener ring thing. too funny. a cheap but fun toy that doesn't fit over the knuckle or a spendy pretty ring
silly girl :nono:
ok, come full circle. wish it were all over, can't wait to get the tree down. wanna re-organize things. wanna move furniture. want dh out of the house, but ACK, will have him 4 F'ING DAYS next weekend.
fork me, I hate Christmas. told him not to get my anything again. and, of course, it is all my fault. I am pissy/in a bitchy mood. he is blameless. happens all the time
he can kiss my ask me no questions and I won't lie to ya
and I already got him something. this should be good. will be interesting to see his reaction to figuring out I got him something anyway. or what, if ANYTHING he gets me. damn I hate feeling this way
so, enough of my bitchy attitude. I do have more to say. a friend of mine, the one that watches the house, has wanted me to help her out with a few projects at her folks' place. you can tell that there was $ at one point over there. some nice stuff too. I am positively green with envy. no matter, really, I am happy for them. her Mom recently bought 3 horses, for her kids and her Alz dh who is having huge med problems. we are all worried about him, and I suddenly find I have a fountain of sympathy and patience for him. guess I remember G-pa and it doesn't bother me to deal with him, but I don't deal much, kwim? is so much easier when I don't have to all the time.
anyway, helped her out some on Friday. worked in the barn etc. nothing major important, lots of lil things, things no-one really knows what to do. simplistic things, but.....something I handle and can very easily fix. makes me feel.....needed, wanted, useful, like an adult. that felt good. yesterday was ok. ended up going to the game with Mark. almost didn't, but figured why punish ME by not going. glad I did, it was a good game.
and this morning, I tried to sleep in. it didn't happen. I am wasted tired. figured, FINE, since I am awake, have lots of time, LET'S GO TO CHURCH :woohoo: really, I wanted to go. we haven't gone in awhile. that was 8:30 I think. we leave the house somewhere between 10-10:15 for services
the phone rang at 9ish. it was L's Mom C. NO WATER. well, DUH, it is FREAKIN COLD outside. it had finally dipped down low enough to freeze the well house and with the state of the house, no one had thought to get the heater going. no one knew what to do either. no biggie, I had more projects to finish over there. is ok too, I wanted away from dh. no dear anything. is like God didn't want me to go. is FINE by me took my handy lil blow torch over and tools in case the pipes were split. torched it a bit, nothing. fun. turned on the ancient heater, which worried both of us (me and L's sister), but it finally kicked on. it started to heat up. so did the damn BIG spider on the wall. that didn't impress me in ANY way shape or form :roll: set the heater kinda close to the pipes (they were metal so no worry there) and headed into the house to let her Mom know I needed a few parts for other projects and what to expect etc etc etc. we talked for 5-10 mins and she turned the water on as I was walking out to the truck. it went on, I am a huge hero. made me feel worth while. I did so little.
SO, I got to spend another day away from dh and the boys. I did come home at lunch and feed Alex. played with Brian. put him down for his nap and went back. still didn't do much, but they still think I am a hero. I don't mind. talked about what to do next. called L and made arrangements/list of things to do. ended up having another pissing contest with Mark. fun. is ok, I win more then I loose now. he has taught me well. I have claws. don't mind sharpening them on him now and then.
don't mess with me you fool. you aren't going to win. you only inspire me to avoid you. he hates that. sorry, but attitude I don't want to deal with will do that
deal with it or get a better one. DING, you loose. I honestly don't care, GOT IT?
I am officially calling off Christmas. today sucks. my head hurts, I feel so bitchy. I wanna kill something. if I didn't know better I would say I was on my period
oh wait, it just started. fun. going in for a shot next week, I don't do this well. I hate this sh!t
oh cool. Mark is in sooooooooo much trouble. Cindy found a place she LIKES. I likes it LOTS. it has 1917 sq foot :woohoo: it has a den AND an office :woohoo: it has nice sized rooms :woohoo: the den could easily be converted to ANOTHER bedroom :woohoo: it has a GORGEOUS garage (altho unfinished, it is HUGE, nice 2 car :woohoo: it has 2 nice sized out buildings (one is the well house) :woohoo: it has a dog kennel/run :woohoo: it has a loafing shed :woohoo:
and the kicker, it has OVER 10 ACRES!! :party:
Mark is going to go see it, he just doesn't know it yet. but OMG!!! I found one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ISN'T in city limits either, so I wouldn't have to pay for permits to add buildings either. WOW. I want that place. damn, and Mark doesn't have a phone. that SUCKS. I want him to go see it. he can pick it apart all he wants. I like it. I want it. he has his damn car. we can put stipulations on it up the ying yang. we CAN make it work. I WANT TO MOVE!!!!!!
reality check. he is IN this house. this is HIS house. he won't be thrilled, but I am gonna see how far I can push
OVER 10 ACRES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey, I miss you!!! Good luck with the pushing!!! Keep me updated!!!
well, quick update: we meet with the realtor to see what we can and can't do. Mark likes the house. I am ok with the house (is is way better then this one) and am TOTALLY in love with the rest. Brian liked it pretty well also, I am pumped. hoping that I don't hit hard with reality and numbers. plus the whole deal will hinge on selling this place
should be interesting. I might have to go dig a few plants up :roll:
well, I haven't killed big red today but he is pushing his luck. and I am tired, don't feel great, feeling heckled and he is pushing every button I have. so far he has made his brother cry, pooped in his pants, woke his brother up, took his brother's toys
I took the :censored: batteries out of the damn noisy train. today I am the evil Mama. evil psycho Mama. and he is GOING ot G-ma's house. never mind this is a treat for him, if he doesn't go he might not make it to tommorrow!
quick update: we just made an official fill out reams of paperwork offer on a house. for now that is all the detail I am going to go into! this house is to be listed mid next week (Jan 10), offer is contigent on sale of this one, AND financing and a house inspection. not gonna shoot ourselves in the foot to get there, kwim?
Alex sits up on his own and now scootches (no crawlign) across the floor and spins in circles. yaking up a storm too, a LOUD storm. Brian is PLAYING with his brother now and it is SOOOOOOOO cute. he was barking and achoo'ing at Alex last night on the way to the game and had Alex giggling like mad. I so hope those two are best of friends. and Brian is also making headway on PT. :woohoo:
well, gotta get back at the projects that have been looming. they have to be done for the sale, and with Mark home, I need to GET AT IT! oh baby baby, I wanna spill details but I am SO afraid I will jinx it!
well, it all fell thru. they countered with a number too high to haggle on. at first I was really ok with it, holding out hope that when we DIDN'T reoffer they would come much closer. but quickly and quietly reality is setting in, and so is some depression. granted they haven't had any time to chew on it either. ok, big deal, they COULD still come back. now I am stuck doing a mad remodel here. we are still going to list the house, if nothing else then to see if we get ANY nibbles. and I emailed Mark earlier. he is trying his best to prop me up, but I dont' think he gets it.
I told him this:
my problem with this house, or any proposed addition is the probability of the road that is going to someday come barreling THRU our yard. one of the big reasons I fell madly in love with this property was a. the view, b. the fact we were away from traffic on what amounts to a cul de sac or dead end and c. the "country" feel out here. we are about to loose all of those things if they start developing. if not now, then in 10 yrs when you will REFUSE to move (aka I am "too old" to move, or to set to move etc). I am also sick and tired of every bonus we get goes to yet ANOTHER house project, and we still have quite a few to go: addition(s), new windows, new carpet, new master bath, ugs, barn, fences, yadda yadda yadda. is going to have to include a new stove and fridge sooner or later as the ones we have now are starting to show signs of problems. I want to have some play money for one year. I don't see that happening anytime soon. it seems to be never ending and honestly becoming overwhelming probability. I don't mind fixing SOME stuff and ending up with a house we like. as in WE, and short of a match, this house isn't going to do that for ME. it has always been, and will always be, you and Julie's house, no matter how much change. it is still the house YOU bought with HER. and it totally doesn't match me or my taste at all. I don't want to get into this. I don't want to fight, I am not saying this for that reason. just imparting information. honestly, I did try to make it mine, but it didn't work. I still do NOT like it, I am sorry, that is my failing. love my flowers. really I do. will really regret having to leave those. BUT, on the other hand.............................
really, I am not trying to start a fight. I have no clue if he is going to take it as such. I do care. I do hate this sudden and strong blue feeling. why can't I just be happy here? ya know, I do pray about it. if He does want me to stay here, WHY can't I just be happy about it? peachy. now I am depressed and pissed. NOT good
ah well, told the realtor we were still going to push to sell the house. list it when the new cabinets get here (7-10 weeks from when we order it) and the flowers start popping (Feb is a good month, everything is waking up, esp my early bulbs). we will probably order them tomorrow. looking at new counters as well. I should just call Valley Cabs and see if they can match it, no wait that way!
back to painting, screwing the wall, sanding, texturing
at least it looks really good. ok, so much better. I still am a novice at the taping and texturing thing. and I still hate doing it, but DANG, I am so happy to see that sh!tty fake paper wainscotting GONE
a lil better today. NOTHING from the realtor, BUT, I didn't expect anything. ok, I don't expect anything. not when the counter offer is 12k over what we offered. is why we didn't recounter. geez. I was hopeful, but, on the other hand, maybe they owe that much. not gonna sweat it either way.
still getting things done, just not balls to the wall. tomorrow we are going to go play a little. then back at it. might go back at it tonight. will see. want to get the corner behind the tv shot and the window trim back up. still, things are looking SO much better. I like it. we could easily finish the walls in the living room this weekend. will see about painting. Mark and I need to get back to negotiating what will and won't get done. Idon't mind him watching the kids and me doing the painting, but I would still rather he do the tedious stuff like putting up the paint tape. I hate doing that. really really really hate that. and trimming. ew. *sigh*
did I mention it looks FABULOUS? I should take pics, I know.
and Dad is supposed to be in surgery today. he is fine. a non-spreading localized cancer on the top of his ear. they are taking it off. unless they bump him AGAIN. not sure how worried he and Mom are, neither are talking much. will be interesting to see what is said/done in the next couple days.
well, the wall is all done. today, I did......drum roll
wait for it!
don't ya really really really HATE it when I do this??
NOTHING!!!!!!! ok, laundry, some odds and ends, did a spread sheet for the upcoming bead buy, but NOTHING from the list
thought I had posted this, but I see I didn't
the house sold to someone else. at least it is under contract. I am alternating between dispair cuz we aren't finding anything else, relief cuz it is a done deal and I was so worried about Mark's eventual reaction, and anger cuz now I am stuck here. again. peachy
found out one of our neighbors is a real redneck. told him I had dated a hispanic and he asked if "Mark knew about that?!?!?!"
I laughed and said "why *name here*, you lil ol redneck you!". was slightly disappointed. made a bit of a joke about it. "of course he does!" (he does too), and said there isn't anything wrong with a lil dark meat. he got "real" concerned then and said, hispanic or black? and i said, why *name here*, the OTHER dark meat, HISPANIC!"
I had his g/f almost howling. and I said I had a ton of respect for most of them, they are usually very hard workers. not all, but more then not. different culture, but that isn't always bad. gonna stop here before I offend someone
anyway, I did/am still getting tons of things done. the textured out "wainscotting" is also painted. of course I have to redo parts of it. part of the back room has been gone thru. Brian's room looks TONS better, and got the extra dresser out (Alex's dresser). the crib is up and in our room (not sure I put that in yet), and altho it does help some Alex still isn't sleepign great
I did get out one day and dig a TON of bermuda out of my flower garden, AGAIN. it looks way better, and you can see the lil buds of the bulbs coming up so they can't be that pissed at beign dug up!
and I am still gearing up for my first buy on BaM. that'll be interesting. going to open up an Ebay shop, both for beads and jewelry, but not just yet. going to start in lil baby steps. I am going to list a bracelet and probably one or two earrings, hopefully within a week
ah yes, and if I didn't put much else in here, Mark did have hernia surgery about 1.5 weeks ago. he is one hurtin unit. I do feel for him, and I know he hurts. dang he can be such a baby sometimes tho. he is a borderline hypochondriac on occasion. I am starting to think he believes he is going to kick the bucket any day now :roll: I know it hurts babe, but DANG!
hehehe, there was some interesting bruising patterns, and it is common for the blood to settle in the lowest point, which would be in the scrotum and penis. I have been keeping an eye on the incision and other things, and I even got to say DANG, at least it isn't falling off oh man, I got quite the hoot out of that. made him laugh a lil too, and he swatted at my fanny. not too fast, I dodged *thb thb thb* he is starting to get faster now tho, I had better watch my step!
seriously tho, the bruising was pretty nasty. it looked......really bad. purple, blue, red. I know he hurts.
anyway. on to more news. the army scootch is FAST now. and he goes where he pleases. another big problem is the dog water. is his favorite destination. we are now working on the word NO!!! AND making it stick. :cry: I can't believe my baby is growing up this fast. some days I can't wait for him to get bigger and more interactive, some days I want my baby baby back. he is so happy tho. he loves to smile and flirt with everyone. G-ma has a real soft spot for him, altho big Bud is still a ringer for her Dad, and she will always have a "special" spot for him
anyhow. things are going. AF reared her evil head again today. damn, I should have got that shot. I am almost scared to do it tho, last time it really messed me up. BUT, this time is way different
still makes me terribly nervous. we will see
oh yeah, and I have decided to start the legwork on a new addition. and try to loose a lil wt. will see hot it goes, I suck at doing it. I love food. I am fat for a REALLY good reason, I love food, food LOVES me! :roll: :shock:
damn it, I am so trying not to hate my father. and my mother for that f'ing matter. it shouldn't matter. I am being borderline psycho/petty about this, but DAMN IT, I am the one that is here, I am the one that helps out Mom, NOT my f'ing "perfect" penis endowed brother. yeah, that's right, I am just the f'ing worthless GIRL. no f'ing wonder I have issues with men! my never here, can't be bothered to call, doesn't have the BALLS to stand up to his wife and spend an odd holiday with HIS family always busy with everything BUT HIS family worthless BROTHER is the executor of my parents will. he is only here when Dad pays for gas, he is only here on "special" request, he is NEVER here on holidays, he NEVER helped around the house
but the lil F#CKER has a F#CKING DICK so HE is going to take care of it. it shouldn't matter.
but it does. and I don't want my sons going over there to learn that BULL SH!T from ANYONE.
damn it I need friends. ones that I can go run around with. we should move. like to the E f'ing coast. far far away. just not where there are NorEasters or Hurricanes. damn, Idaho is looking better and better
this just f'ing hurts. I am so sick of it. it is like, OH LOOK, she has so much to stress over, to worry about, why not poke her while she is down. yeah yeah, that's a good thing, let's just remind her how WORTHLESS we really think she is. the ball-less bitch is, after all, JUST A GIRL
damn, I am going to go clean something before I cry
Corvallis is beautiful. close to the coast. I did map it all out one time. there is a land-based Univ research station there too
they raise sheep.
I wanna farm dammit. some days I think I should just run away
sadly, problems always follow, hunt ya down, and shoot ya in the ass. I could do without that today I think
well, another day......still geting things done, more off then on, but hey, at least forward progress IS forward progress, right? not much done in the house. haven't been feeling fantastic. Alex has a few days of "good" nights and naps, and then more of nights from hell and me not dealing well with it. never did deal well with a lack of sleep!
on the other hand, LOTS of things going on. is the goings on that makes things interesting. like 2 new teeth (bottom) and more coming. like the army crawl isn't always on his belly, sometimes he is up on all 4's. like he sits up on his own now. like he has all but pulled up, def falls over really well now :roll: OH OH OH , LIKE MAMA!! it isn't just mommommommom, it is now MAMA or MAMAM. he gives hugs, still snuggles in quite nicely, and is (or was) eating really well, not just nursing! he and his brother play together, altho we do have to watch Brian so he doesn't WACK his brother or take ALL the toys. he is becoming a real "human" pretty quick. he claps too, zerberts, "flies" his airplanes and makes appropriate noises. he is such a doll
and, on another front, I also got wireless internet today. NICE! ok, not quite a nice as cable is, but it sends pretty quick, and is LIGHTNING fast in comparison to dial up! signed up for that internet phone thing too. oh yeah, and af was supposed to show a few days ago, so I did go blow a preg test (we never did have Mark tested afterwards). :party: IT WAS NEGATIVE! :woohoo:
damn, that so had me sweating bullets!
oh yeah, and we also are going forward with an addition. mud/laundry/pantry type room. went and talked to our bank. that didn't go well. gotta go to the one that holds our house note. I guess. ah well.
SOOOOOOOOOO. anyway, Brian is at G-ma's house. we are getting things ready for the addition. will see how things go tomorrow.
oh yeah, and drove by the house we made the offer on. it did sell for sure. there are horses out there :cry: but, guess it wasn't meant to be. found out that YES, most of the houses out there are having problems with wells drying up. and altho we were ok with the floor plan it wasn't anything special. it did have other problems for us too. but I hope they enjoy it. who knows what is in store for us, we are still looking!
and with that I need to go. Alex is melting down. think he is about ready to go to bed! needs dinner for sure, and a lil nursing. still. *sigh*
something I didn't put in my journal yesterday. not sure I am handling it all that well, but my sister just lost her child. she was 4 mos or so, she had a sharp pain and went in to the dr. she is high risk, heprin shots and the whole shebang. the ultrasound showed no heart beat. she is devastated. I know, who isn't, but......Mom and Dad already have airline tickets to go for her due date, and they are scrambling to see if maybe they can change it if she wants them too. I might wait another day and see if she wants me to fly up. not sure I would do much good with the two boys.
THIS MEANS WAR!! that SH!T-HEAD has been throwing my stuff in the garage out! I have no idea if it is just one box of if that is why I can't find my stuff out there. what an INCREDIBLY STUPID thing to do
guess that means I don't have to wait for him to clean out the garage. means I can throw away anything I want. seems that is what he thinks, and I am itching to get rid of the stench of his ex wife.
what the HELL was he thinking?!?!?!?!
ok, was there ANY higher brain function involved? damn cave man mentality. he wants to have a pissing contest? don't mess with me honey, I can go from irritating to psycho b!tch in 1 second or less. my blood is boiling. IDIOT!
ok, I have to put something positive in my journal. don't have to go far tho I need to go get more big boy pants for Brian!! :woohoo: he still gets a diaper at night, but he hasn't had an accident in his big boy pants in several days! :party: of course, if we put a pull up on him..... :roll:
so, WE DON'T!
way to go Big Bud!
well, the bank is gearing up to give us an answer on the line of equity. of course, our :censored: contractor STILL doesn't have plans done :spanking: :pissed: :blowup: :chairha!: :WTF: :whippin:
he is due here tomorrow. if he doesn't show, he is FIRED. can his a$$, have had enough of this garbage!
on the up side, we do have ASPHALT! :woohoo:
Dan did along the E side of the garage last week, did the rest today. OMG it looks WONDERFUL! I can't wait to get something we can slide down the drive on...just me and the boys! we have this slight hill :roll:
and Brian is doing pretty good too. Alex has 3 teeth, will cruise like mad on anything, and has let go for a couple seconds here and there. he is getting so big, so FAST. the bead BUYING is going great. I just got a new shipment of crystals today, they are GORGEOUS. have another coming too. the splits are ready to go out shortly, just waiting for confirmation from my split partners. nothing quite as neat as getting a large package of Swarovski Crystals!
AND found out Mark is still throwing stuff out. it isn't good. he won't like me when I am done. hey, at least this time I am not psycho, but he also isn't stupid enough to be touchy feely. touch me ya big a$$ and I bite. he knows, leaving me alone for now anyway.
dang, I am so disappointed and angry at him. geez.......
VOILA! I FIRED HIS WORTHLESS A$$
and we have a new one. friend of Mom and Dad's, will be interesting to see how it goes. he was tryign to REALLY short notice it and get here today, but is swamped (both a good sign AND bad) and will be here tomorrow or Sat instead. he called first thing this am to let me know INSTEAD of waiting until I was WAITING all day for him. nice. of course, I was asleep. Alex had one hell of a night. not good. still, is nice he is on top of things!
more good news. two nights in a row. Brian is dry in the morning! he went to the game, went potty in the big noisy toilet NO PROBLEM. I expect accidents, but, I can honestly say I am pretty sure I can consider him PT
WAY TO GO BIG BUD!!!!!!
MORE "good" news. ok, it is both annoying, frustrating, dealt with sort of news. yrs ago I trashed my credit. was going to school, got a couple credit cards, got in a bit over my head. cleaned it up before I got married. so I thought. we went for the loan and DING! there was still one out there. I vaguely remember it. they didn't want to work with the credit counsel place. then they marked it as default, and were sold to someone else. oh fun. could'nt find them. no one had my information. YES I looked. and I looked all over! so I let it go. of course, FOUND the a$$ho!es when I tried to get a loan :angry4:
and after 2 days of solid looking, with at least a starting point to jump off of. I found em. nope, nothing in the mail. nope, no phone calls (of course, they could have hit the online wall too, who knows). so I get them to offer me a settlement and they are SUPPOSED to mail it to me. it "went out" on the 8th. it still isn't here. so I call today, they can't send it to a third party :bs: :wtf: so I told them to send it to "my" fax and gave them the bank fax #. is where it is going anyway. was supposed to be sent "right now" and it wasn't. so I called back like 30+ mins later. pissy b!tch too. it should be sent today, if not I am calling back tomorrow. GEEZ, I am TRYING to send em money!! and, of course, I deal with it the same way I used too. I can't hardly sleep. Alex doesn't help. my stress levels etc are thru the roof. it SUCKS
BUT! it is all but dealt with. a bazillion phone calls later, I finally have the pertinent info, and think we are on the brink of it all being FINISHED. that is the good news. that and the bank is ready to go on the loan, AS SOON AS we have that :censored: fax!!
we are SUPPOSED to sign tomorrow :woohoo: and then we get on to new windows, addition, in ground sprinks, fences etc. NICE. hey, if we are going to be stuck here, may as well make it as good as we can, right? I want the ugs with the timers and EVERYTHING
oh yeah, gonna have to get a plan drawn up for Rainbird. get that ready to go
my list is growing, some days by the minute.
oh yeah, going to try to have a garage sale next weekend yeah, I know. that is STUPID. but I am trying. and if we can get enough $ together, Mom and I are taking the boys to Portland Via train to the zoo etc. haven't said a word to Brian. never mind I am pretty excited to be going too. he isn't the only one that loves train rides
anyway. one of these days I have to get my website up and going. really. really really. wish I could hire it out, but.....I would'nt know where to start. any one know of someone? I have a godaddy account I never activated, but paid for. need to work on that. guess THAT is where I start? ah well. I have too much to do to even consider tackling it. I am so stressed out already, I am not even really working on jewelry. or quilting. or even gardening much. I need to do something. was going to do the tanning thing tonight, but got roped into hostessing chat tonight. I need to avoid Jules. think she knows that! next I will be writing another article :roll:
BUT FIRST, I need to get more organized. hey, at least I don't have to be dressed or do my hair to chat! hehehehe, I probably won't make much sense either
I need a nap. I can have a wishful thought or two.
ok, garage sale next weekend is officially postponed. I don't have any energy to sort this weekend. I feel like