Thread: Through darkness comes miracles....

just wanted to let you know I'm think of you!

Thank you Cassie...what the hell are you thinking turning your siggy off in my journal? Get that thing back up there, how is everyone supposed to check out your SUPER cute prego belly when they can't click on your link, huh?


Ok so my dear body "letter of yesterday, kind of worked. CHECK. OUT. THIS. OPK. (ovulation predictor kit, for my non TTC'ers, you pee on it like a prego test and if your lines are as dark as eachother, that means its baby making time )




No temp spike this morning, BUT I did have to get up 20 minutes before I normally would have and it was a smidge higher than previous days, so that's good. I hope it just sky rockets tomorrow so that I know for sure.

Also, I can't check CM because I've been trying this thing where I just sleep with Dion's swimmers all night and so the next day is always kind of messy and sticky. So even if I was going to get EWCM, I might not know it. Whatever though, there isn't anything I can do to change that and I have and will absolutely do everything in my power to get prego this cycle, the rest is up to God.

I'm feeling "good" today. Not great, a bit hopeful but still staying grounded. We'll be BDing for at least the next 2 nights, then I'm sure I'm going to need a break.

Hey Jen!

Just wanted you to know that I said an extra little prayer for you!!

Thank you Christy!!! The prayers right now are making all the difference in the world to me! Seriously! Thank you!

Well....I think I did it....I think I ovulated!!!

Clearly this should not be the biggest of feats BUT since I found out that only 1 of my fallopian tubes is open, I just felt like I would only ovulate every other cycle. So having gotten a + opk last cycle, I was VERY nervous about this one, espcially since it's my EDD month and everything.
So having my temp go up this morning and getting a +opk...I just feel very fortunate.

I prayed to god this morning, a very precise prayer and thanked him for already having answered some of my others. I am very hopeful about this cycle, maybe too hopeful. I will just be continuing to pray to him and have faith that he will bless us!

With having O'd yesterday probably, I will only be 11DPO at the time of testing. basically 1 day before I got my BFP with Kylie. I'm nervous about this as well as 1,000,000 other things and I am sure that this 2WW (two week wait) will be absolutely excruciating and emotion. I will get through it day by day though.

Jen I just wanted you to know that I have been sending extra prayers your way and had a very nice chat with God last night and this morning knowing you O'd....

Jen~ This two week wait will most certainly be excruciating and hard and more nerve-racking than any other you've faced before. I'm right here with you, though. If you need to rant... You know...

Thanks Ally.

This is such a trying time right now. I really want to stay positive and hopeful and just trust and have faith, but there is this little voice in my head telling me not to put everthing on this cycle....Its so hard, I reall feel like this just had to be it, Kylies due date just has to bring me some sort of healing or something. Ugh...I'm not expressing this well.


So I should have gotten CH yesterday BUT I was going on about an hour and a half of sleep when I temped and it was really low (which by the way, is strange in itself because it should have been high I would have thought, anyway) then this morning my temp SKY ROCKETS. I'm so confused and have no idea what if anything it means.

I've got this other weird, tinkling issue which I don't think is related to TTC. Other than the fact that for 4 days in a row I slept with Dion's little swimmers all night and now I'm afraid of infection or something, I was just trying to keep as many of those suckers in there for as long as possible, maybe that wasn't such a good idea. I guess we'll know eventually.

So anyways, I guess I'm just hoping my temps stay high and that time jsut FLIES by, I'll be testing on Presidents day, Monday, Kylies Due date, 1 week from today. All I can do now is pray. (and try to stay occupied so as not to kill myself with anxiety)

Dear lord,
please let me get big and huge and round and be able to complain about how much I can't sleep or walk around without getting winded. I will joyfully take every single stretch mark and varicose vein and ounce of weight gain you want to throw at me just to feel what it feels like to be a mother. Just to see my child take a first breath, smile and laugh. Please let this be it for me. With everything that I am, deep down to the core, I pray this to you. I have done my part, I did all I could, it is only up to you now. Please help me make my husband a father.

Amen

I wanted to put this in my current journal so that I would always just be able to go to one place, in times of need or remembrance and even later on when I'm pg (pregnant) just for me.

Its the link to my journal with Kylie.

From wife to mother...continued