Let the stressing begin!

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Let the stressing begin!

I guess it is only natural to stress out about the baby after a bfp--I don't think I ever really stop stressing the entire pregnancy. But now that I've had 2 losses in a row, I'm really stressing! A little bit of my background--I usually get pg pretty easily. The first time I was just completely naive to m/c and thought everything was fine and went in for my 12 week visit to find out baby had stopped growing at 8. I went on to have 3 healthy pg, getting pg the first or 2nd try (and with dd not even trying at all-she was a surprise pg).

Then In august I had a chemical pregnancy (I guess that is what it is called when its early?) at 5 weeks. It just seemed like my period was a week late and a little heavier. But I just had this gut feeling to test when I was 1 day late, otherwise I wouldn't even have known about it (as we were not trying).

Then again, we were not trying in November and I got pg again--we had been planning to start trying in december so it was not too big a deal--and I was stressed so I went and did beta tests which showed great numbers. I went in at 6.5 weeks for a dating u/s and had a great u/s with a heartbeat. So I thought I was in the clear and so we told everyone over christmas when I was 10 weeks. I went in for a 12 week visit and the dr could not find a hb with the doppler. She pulled in the u/s machine and found baby--the size for 8 weeks with no h/b. I was so devastated because I thought everything was fine. I went 2 more weeks carrying the pg until I finally m/c on my own at 14 weeks.

Now I'm stressing! I took a FRER yesterday afternoon after holding my pee for 3 hours and got a + . It was not extremely dark, even though AF was due yesterday or today. Only about 1/2 the intensity of the control line. So I used the 2nd FRER from the box this morning, thinking it would be blaring + and its only about the same as yesterday, even with FMU. Before I tested yesterday, I was pretty sure it would be neg as I had the feeling AF was starting, with some period like cramping...but mixed with a bit of nausea, so I decided to test anyway. I don't know if it will do any good to go in for BETA testing though, as last time that didn't matter anyway.

Sorry for the long novel, I guess I just wanted some reassurance that a lighter FRER test doesn't mean its over.

Here's the pic of yesterday's test: (todays looks just the same) Is this a light line for 14 dpo?

Alissa_Sal's picture
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Holly,
First of all - huuuuuge hugs for your losses.

According to PeeOnAStick.com (which I read obsessively - LOL):

Bolding is mine.

9. I took another test and the line is lighter. Does this mean anything? Should it get darker? Not necessarily. In general, the positive line will be darker when a greater amount of hCG is present in the urine, but not always. Some tests contain more or less dye (meaning there is just more or less color to "stick" to your hCG.) Some tests are more or less sensitive-- even 2 tests in the same box can be different. Also, your urine may have more or less hCG in it depending on what you ate or drank, or how long it's been since you last peed. Food itself does not cause false results, but can affect how much urine you have and how dilute it is. Eating salty chips and drinking caffeine all day will result in more concentrated pee, whereas gorging on watermelon and ginger ale will result in lots of very dilute pee. But an HPT is not meant to tell you "how" pregnant you are. It only tells you if you are pregnant or not. As long as there is a line in the results window, you are pregnant.

Some women experiencing early miscarriages do notice their lines getting fainter or disappearing entirely, but even if your line gets fainter, it is not a guarantee that you are miscarrying, or that anything is wrong. See FAQ 21 for normal levels of hCG and how to properly measure it.

http://www.peeonastick.com/hptfaq.html#9

I totally understand - I have had a loss too, and I am trying not to stress myself out either, and it is HARD. I took a FRER yesterday afternoon after holding my pee for about 3.5 hours, and then another one this morning with FMU and I think they looked about the same. I'm worried about the exact same thing. But, I think we should just both try to stay positive and hope for the best and remember that these tests aren't supposed to tell us *how* pregnant we are - just that we are pregnant.

:bighug:

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"Alissa_Sal" wrote:


I totally understand - I have had a loss too, and I am trying not to stress myself out either, and it is HARD.
I took a FRER yesterday afternoon after holding my pee for about 3.5 hours, and then another one this morning with FMU and I think they looked about the same. I'm worried about the exact same thing. But, I think we should just both try to stay positive and hope for the best and remember that these tests aren't supposed to tell us *how* pregnant we are - just that we are pregnant.

THIS. I had a loss and my lines eventually disappeared. I knew what it mean and within a few days I m/c. So with this pg I tested every day for over a week - crazy I know, but I just had to make sure that line was still there every day.

Try to not worry (ha! Like that's possible for us to do, right).

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I know, I'm trying not to worry--just take what comes. But I feel like I can't get too excited yet either, afraid to attach. I know thats sad, but hopefully it will all turn out ok!

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I know exactly how you feel and unfortunately all any of us can do is wait -- thankfully it's together!

I think the line is fine for 14DPO - it's not like a squinter or anything -- clearly positive, so I would focus on that!

Lots of hugs for you

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Hope all turns out well for you, you def deserve it!

yellow.rose.of.canada's picture
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First of all, :bighug:. I haven't experienced a loss before, so I can't even fathom how you have felt and are feeling.

I do, however, usually get really faint lines for BFPs. With DD, my lines never got as dark as yours is now (I stopped testing after the first four days or so). I hope that you can get the assurance you need soon so you can relax and enjoy this pregnancy.

Best wishes for a happy, healthy nine months! Smile

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{{{hugs}}}

It can be so hard. Having also experienced a loss it can be devastating.

With DS#4 I chose to celebrate the pregnancy, not necessarily the baby, at first. It wasn't until I *knew* everything was great that I finally celebrated the baby, too. I'm trying to be very optimistic this time around, too.

I find myself saying " I'm so happy to be pregnant". So again, it's centered around the pregnancy rather than the baby. ( though I often tell the baby to grow, grow, grow and keep the symptoms coming) Wink

I hope you can find a way to alleviate the stress and worry and celebrate this time you have. You deserve that happiness!

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With DD, I only had super, super faint lines. I tested at 14 DPO, in the afternoon, and got such a faint line I didn't believe it. Especially since with DS, I had a bright line, in the afternoon, at 11 DPO. For days and days I didn't believe I was preggo because the lines were faint. I finally got a digital test and started to believe it!

With this pregnancy, I got faint line at 10 DPO -- the earliest I've ever had a result. So, I guess maybe it can vary with not only the test, but also the pregnancy? I know it's hard not to worry, especially at this stage where it can sometimes feel like there's no 'real' confirmation of being pregnant.