ok so as probably none of you know I have been in arizona visiting my sister the past 2 weeks. She is living with an ex as sort of a roommate situation but she doesnt work or go to school so he is paying for everything. She had a falling out with our mom about 6 months ago and refuses to speak to her anymore so really this is her only option of places she can stay. My sister is a very high maintenence girl; she wants the best of everything and expects people to get whatever it is she wants. Pretty much we are the complete opposites. I still love her to death and am done trying to change her or argue over something that is not in my control. HOWEVER she has an extreme dependency problem. about 9 years ago she was diagnosed with west nile virus, virul meningitis and ensephalitits(sp?) She was in and out of hospitals had to be home schooled; very sick. Since then though she has been on Dilaudid(very strong strong narcotic) she suffers from chronic headaches due to her brain swelling so much and nerves getting damaged. Everyday for the past 9 years she complains about being in pain and so she pops pills. her tollerance is so high she literally takes enough to kill someone my size. last week she was admitted into the hospital due to weakness and numbness in her left leg. She is unable to move it from the knee down. We are guessing something must have happened while she was high on her pills because she doesnt remember a thing except for waking up and not being able to walk. The night before she woke up i talked with her on the phone and she was completely out of it not making any sense what so ever. Sadly ive gotten some what used to this. All the tests the doctors have performed have come back negative WHICH is a good thing because it ruled out she has no disease or tumor. I stayed in the hospital for 4 days with her and watched her complain about how the 4mg of dilaudid plus morphine plus muscle relaxers every 4 hours was not enough for her pain and so i sat there and watched her take 5 tablets of the 8mg dilaudid. The highest dose dilaudid comes in is 8 mg. I was scared to leave her thinking she would overdose, my stress has been though the roof. She got discharged and now shes home; im still here i dont leave till sunday. They did one test that did say something but all it said was that the nerves where her sciatic branches off at the knee werent working, they still dont know the cause but i am guess a pinched nerve somehow. Anyways she was taken off the dilaudid after she got out of the hospital because at her appointment we both told the dr how it must not be working because she has such a high tollerance for it. He prescribed her ER morphine 3xdaily. She got these tuesday; last night (wednesday) her bedroom door was locked i banged on the door because she is going through a withdrawl and has been very very emotional so naturally i was worried about her; once she opened the door she could barely stand up her eyes were rolled into the back of her head and her mouth was blue like the color of the pills, she was drooling everywhere and her speech was slurred. I was scared ****less. I kept asking her what she took and she was unable to tell me. I got her into bed and immediatly found all her pill bottles and counted them because we just got them fill the day before so i knew how much was suppose to be in there. from my counting she took 5 1mg klonopin, 2 ambiens, 2 muscle relaxers, 21 ER 15mg morphine. I was up till 4am checking on her and feeling her pulse. This morning i confronted her about it and somehow i was the bad guy. How dare I count her pills and then blame her for not sleeping. (im such a horrible sister) she didnt remember anything from last night and i said she cant lock the doors because if something happened i wouldnt be able to get in unless i broke the frame. She then told me that she knows i wont believe her but she sees ghosts and talks to them so they must have done it. ..... strange I know. Today she was very emotional again but i sat with her as she took her pills tonight and she took 2 of everything. I tucked her into bed as she nodded out in her ice cream, i cleaned the jewlery off her bed and made sure she was comfortable. I am terrified of something happening to her and dont know what to do anymore. she wants my dh and i to rent her a house out here so she can live in it while we finish up things in nc. We financially cant do that. Plus i wouldnt want her living alone. By the way shes 15 months older than I am. My hearts broken for her. Thinking about it I break down into tears. Its like something out of an addiction reference book. She has been sent to rehab but always signs herself out because in her mind she isnt a drug addict shes just in pain; but its hard for me to believe that a majority of the pain isnt emotional and taking these pills makes her numb. She says I have no room to talk because yes I was the "bad girl" i partied a lot, did drugs, popped pills, traveled all over the place doing this stuff but the past 2.5 years i have been a completely different person. I want the best for her but I cant save every person in my life. How do u help someone that doesnt see they need help? I needed to vent because every person i my life that i try to talk with about this just puts her down and i dont want the negativity or the drama; i have enough of it around me. any ideas?