Older siblings and jealousy

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nurseamanda's picture
Last seen: 3 years 5 months ago
Joined: 10/11/09
Posts: 353
Older siblings and jealousy

For those of you who have more then one child, how are your older kids adjusting to the new baby? We are having some jealousy issues with DD. She has started waking up several times a night, screaming and crying for mommy. If I am busy with the baby and daddy goes to her, it is a total meltdown. She just wants momma. During the day if Spencer is sleeping, she will play with me, or play by herself, but as soon as he wakes up and needs attention, she starts demanding my attention. She yells at me and tells me not to feed the baby. Last night she came and grabbed the bottle right out of my hand and ran away with it. She is always peeing in her panties when I am busy with the baby. (she doesn't do this at daycare or when daddy is home). The other day we were getting ready to go for a walk, and she started crying because she didn't want Spencer to come with us. I know it's normal for older siblings to be jealous, but how long will this last? I am trying really hard to be patient with her, and I am trying to spend lots of alone time with her, but it just doesn't seem like enough. She likes the baby, and isn't aggresive or anything towards him, she just doesn't want me to have anything to do with him. Anyones have any suggestions?

DrakePlusOne's picture
Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 06/29/09
Posts: 1889

Aww that a tricky one. :/ Maybe when Spencer is awake, pretend like he is talking to her 'Hi Hailey. I sure do love having a big sister.' When my 3yo is playing, I bring Philly down and tell Seth, look at brother watching you! He sure does love you! I don't know if you do things like that already so this might not be helpful. It's hard to transition sometimes.

VixB's picture
Last seen: 3 years 6 months ago
Joined: 05/07/08
Posts: 1435

Hunter acts up more since Heidi is born. He screams and doesnt always listens. We have to put him in the corner more often and put away his wii. But overall, he doesnt really pay to much attention to his sis for now. He tells us to put her in her crib or bouncy chair when he wants us to play with him Wink

Last seen: 3 years 7 months ago
Joined: 04/30/09
Posts: 2257

Emma goes both ways. With John being sick and then spending so much time nursing most of last week (thanks 3 month growth spurt!) Em has been really upset with me. She will tell me to put brother down, say she needs to go potty, take clothes off etc if she wants my attention.

Her new thing is just wanting daddy 24/7. I love that they're bonding so much as DH works long hours and often works 6 days a week, but I feel like some of it is resentment towards me for caring for John.

I do what Marie does too as far as telling her that John is watching her and loves her. She loves her brother but sometimes she just needs some reassurance. In the now rare instances when we do have alone time, I try to come up with new things to do (ex. we just gave her play doh for the first time and she and I made a bunch of things) or an activity we can do together that is a "big girl" thing that she will enjoy. I try to just play up her talents or teach her something new so she has to focus as she can be very independent until brother needs something. I hope things get better for you soon!