Chat to the Crowns, Part 14!

Amber that is crazy that X is going to see the kids.. How do you think the boys will do? Does he call often? Serioulsy you need to get on here more.

When I asked Russ if he wanted to see him he said its up to Austin. I slowly worked on him and told him that he has a say too that I want to know what he thinks. He said he doesn't want to see him. Then Russ said that if he came here, he guesses he would see him. I explained we'd probably go to the zoo like last time. Russ asked if I'd go with him and then said something about needing someone with him. That is concerning. About a month ago Russ told me he only wants one daddy. He wants Doug to adopt him and he doesn't want X to be his daddy anymore. He explained that X tells him all the time he loves him but he doesn't think he really does. And X mad him sad (apparently Russ is my son and holds grudges) when he told him that Doug is not his daddy, he only has one.

X rarely has contact. He called on thanksgiving, then xmas. No calls since. Emails to check on the boys are pretty non existent too.

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He really is a *** hat

Tell me about it. I'm struggling with letting go of the bitterness and resentment. I'm over how he treated me but just can't get past how he treats the boys.

Amber - that is so sad about the relationship between Russ and X...but if X doesn't put forth the effort, then it's to be expected.

Russ is a smart kid and saw way more than he should have. He is now at an age that he is starting to piece together "missing" pieces of the story, stuff he saw but didn't understand.

The day at the zoo went well. X doesn't really know how to interact with the boys and really babied them. Like DH said, he hasn't had a relationship with them since Austin was 10 months and Russ was 2 1/2. When they first got there, Russ was pretty indifferent and just said hi. Austin has no stranger danger so acted like he does with everyone. If Russ would pay more attn to DH, then X would focus a ton of effort on Austin. We spent 4 hours at the zoo then I offered up dinner like McDonalds but he didn't seem interested so we just came home. Oh and the best part was if DH was playing with Austin then X would have to compete. It was hilarious. X also doesn't understand how divorce works. He is under the impression he can come every weekend, which i put a stop to.

Glad the day at the zoo didn't turn out totally bad...

Amber glad the zoo turned out ok. Glad you put X in his place. How are things with you and your DH's X?

Things with his X are comical. In Dec she told me I had to ask before cutting the boys' hair. I went off on her and put her in her place. After the way she treated DH at mediation I no longer have a filter in place and know I'll put her in her place every single time she says anything I don't like. On the outside we are cordial to each other.