This is sooo long, sorry!
I am sorry to be such a whiny butt on here all the time, but I don't know where else to go!
My feelings are so hurt right now! I am sure I am just being pregnant overemotional... but I am tired and I feel huge and unattractive and I am not getting enough sleep and work is driving me CRAZY!
Anyway... I know that I am not technically a mom yet, but as much as my every single thought goes into this little guy I feel like a mom.
Alex and I had our baby party yesterday and it was great, and he did his part in preparing for it... he helped me go get the beer and water, he mowed the lawn, he picked up the tables and chairs we had to rent and is taking them back and he picked up the cake and the ice. He also chopped all the onions and such for the nachos. I am very thankful he did his half in that!
Anyway... after the party he wanted to go to the bar. I really didn't want him to. He goes all the time and I just don't think he needs to be going to that crummy bar all the time.... I think more than once a week is ridiculous. He told me he would be home by midnight and I said I would like him home by 11. Midnight came and went and I texted him and he texted back he was on his way. He didn't get home until after 2 and ignored a text and phone call I made to him between the previous text.
I had to work today and he was meeting his mom and brother to celebrate mother's day at her house at 5, I didn't get off until 6. I know I shouldn't expect anything, but come one... a card, something.... I don't know. I came home to an empty house... had to put the dishes away and eat by myself (my mommy is busy today). It made me cry... I felt so sad and alone. Anyway... he texted me and said "Happy Mommy Day" and that he was helping his mom with her garden and would be home later. Then around 9 that he had gotten a call from our renter that the power company had said we needed to cut down a tree that was blocking power lines and he had to go check it out... really.. he had to go do that RIGHT now?( I should mention our rental home is right by his bar) He said he would be home after.... He then texted me that he was going to play pool "for a bit" with Chris (our renter).
Goodness knows how long he will be gone. I hate this soooo much... and like I said, I know I am not "technically" a mommy, but I REALLY REALLY REALLY would have appreciated some recognition and special attention today.... not to be home alone all night wondering when he will get home. It's now ten and I am already sooo incredibly tired, but just feel so frustrated I don't know how I will sleep peacefully, especially since I don't know if he will be home in an hour or 5. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH.... and now I am crying again. I hate feeling this way, I don't want it rubbing off on Roman, but I just can't get over it right now.