Gracie's Birth Story-long & no doubt, colorful.

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angielily's picture
Last seen: 4 years 11 months ago
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Gracie's Birth Story-long & no doubt, colorful.

Hopefully I have enough time to get it all down Wink

Well, I suppose it starts on Friday, July 8, 2011, with some spotting, which continued through the next day, along with that "crampy" feeling. Ryan & I settled down that night & watched a few movies & went to bed. At around 5:30 I woke up to pee...I was feeling very crampy at this point, but since I had to pee so badly, I attributed the cramps to that fact. I dozed off until 5:40, when I woke up, cramping again. I had a pretty good idea why & at 5:50 when I felt another, I tapped Ryan & told him what was up, then said I'd wake him when it was time to go if he wasn't up yet.
I piddled around for awhile, washing clothes, bathing, playing on the computer, etc. The contractions were still 10 min apart...then they started getting closer & a little longer. At around 9, I called the hospital to double-check protocol (I thought I was supposed to wait til they were 3 to 5 minutes apart), but the chick said to come in. Or rather, she said something like "Uhh...if yer in labor then you needa get to a hospital. I's 'posed to tell you that." Like I said on my facebook...who am I to argue with such a professional? Anyhoo, I wanted to take a shower, so I woke Ryan & asked him if he could be ready in an hour. He mumbled something that sounded a whole lot like "Yes", but when I got out the shower 30 minutes later, he was still asleep :rolleyes:. All I could imagine was having a baby on the kitchen floor while his hungover *** went through his daily routine of 3 cups of coffee, lol. I finally got him up & ready to go. But first...I needed to stop at Target for a nursing bra & a robe. That seemed to amuse everyone, for some reason.
I got to the hospital at around 11:30 & after I discovered admit was closed on weekends (just my luck) & finally learned from a security guard where to go, I made it up to L & D at around 12ish. I met Beverly, the nurse who would make my life suck for the next few hours & got my nake on. I first learned how I would end up disliking her when she checked my cervix...OH MY GAWD, I have never been violated in such a way. I nearly needed to suck my thumb & hold a teddy bear after...besides, I was only 2.5 cm. Not cool. I tried to tell her the answering service told me to come in (hence, I would gladly go back home & labor some more), but she wasn't interested. I lay there & labored away for 2.5 hours...since they were monitoring me, I couldn't get up & walk around. I felt the contractions getting stronger & closer together, so when home girl Beverly busted up in my crib & told me she didn't think I was in "real labor" I nearly strangled her with my blood pressure cuff. She said they'd monitor me for 30 more minutes & probably send me home.
Now, here is where I tried, once again (unsuccessfully) to intervene. The same, exact thing happened with Clara. I tried to explain I'd probably need pitocin. I tried to tell that biatch that the Dr had to break my water last time. I tried to tell her that my contractions were very freaking real, but nope. Not listening. Luckily when she violated my girly parts 30 minutes later, I had dilated to a full 3.
Then I got the good news...Hello, pitocin. I knew we'd meet again.
Let me back up a bit. I'd never felt very strong contractions before 'cause when I had Clara, I asked for my epidural when they hooked up my pitocin. I heard too many bad things about that stuff. So when I asked for the epi this time & was denied it, I got a little terrified.
The pit started working immediatly. An hour after I got it, I was officially in pain, but taking it well, save an f-bomb here & there. Once again (especially since I knew the dr would hem-haw around before actually giving it to me) I asked for my epi. NOPE. "Let's get a good pattern going first" she said. Ryan looked at me like "Has this ***** lost her mind??" & I said "Um, it sure looks like a damn pattern to me!!" She laughed me off & left me to wallow in my own private hell. I was starting to panic that I'd feel every part of my tearing vagina & sorry, respect to all of you who braved that, but I'm not into it. Dirol Beverly picked this point to tell me I had to lay on my right side & couldn't move from there, lest Gracie's heartbeat dip. Oh, somebody kill me, please! I knew I had to stay calm (I did my best), I knew not to let myself worry (I didn't do so well), I just tried to think about my sweet baby & about how my Mom had my brother & myself all natural-like. I attempted to dust off my memories of her & what she said helped her though it, but it was no use. I never needed her so badly...poor Ryan didn't know what on earth to do, so he just quietly watched the movie on tv & laughed everytime I made a smart-*** comment between contractions, bless his heart. He is so, so strong until he sees someone he loves hurting...then he doesn't know what to do.
Pretty soon my contrax were coming one after another & the pressure on my perineum was getting strong...I knew I was nearing transitional labor & TOLD Beverly to get my epidural. She checked me & I was at 7 cm. Then she decided to make a little joke that I could wait 30 minutes & have the baby without any drugs. It was then I gritted my teeth & said loudly, "Only if I can have my cat here to help soothe me, otherwise, BETTER LIVING THROUGH CHEMICALS." She told me good job & called the Dr.
This part is a blur. I was doing the focal point/ breathing thing, trying to put myself in a better place, etc, but I just wasn't trained at all for that & I didn't know how to make it better. I couldn't string 2 words together during a contraction. About 30 minutes after I asked (and 20 minutes after Beverly rolled the cart with all my meds on it into the room to torture me further) the Dr came in, told Ryan to leave (he nearly ran), took a look at me (I stayed pretty calm through it all, but I believe I was gasping for air at this junction), took a peek at the moniter & said to the nurse "Ooh, this is a bad one." YA THINK?!? Finally, she did the epi, all the while Beverly was breathing with me (why the hell couldn't she show Ryan how to do that 3 hours ago?) & I thought relief was on the way.
You guessed it...the damn thing didn't take on both sides.
I didn't care one bit. Cervical check: 9cm.
The Dr stayed with me awhile to fix everything, which she was able to do without re-doing it & my family came in. Hahaha! Ryan peeked in & when he saw me laying there quietly, you could visably see the color return to his face.
Fast forward an hour...I started really feeling pressure & saw the contrax on the monitor peaking, so I called Beverly & instead, blessedly, 2 young, sweet nurses came in, ready to assist me. What was even better, my Dr was with them!!! He JUST got back from a trip. And they were going to break my water since that was the only thing preventing me from reaching a full 10cm. Woohoo!
After he did that, they all sat in my room joking with me for about 15 minutes, then Dr G checked again & told me to push. They called Ryan back in, but he was looking really nervous. I sucked it up & told him to wait outside for us...I promised they'd call him the second Gracie was here & that I could handle it & that I loved him so very much. He was so torn (my aunt said he was sad in the waiting room for leaving me in there), but I knew I could concentrate better without having to worry about him freaking out. I wanted us all to enjoy Grace's birth & if that meant he wait outside, so be it. He left & I started pushing, the whole time cracking up at my Dr's goofiness Smile This time I could actually feel my child come out into the world, not much hurt, just a kind of twisty was awesome. When her head emerged, she was covered in blood & had it all in her mouth & stuff. The Dr said I had an abruption, but I don't know how bad. I pushed again & there she was, my beautiful Grace Rose, absolutely perfect & looking just like her goofy Dad. Happy Anniversary to us Smile
She was 6.7lbs, 20.5in long, born at 7:55 pm on July 10, 2011.

mommys's picture
Last seen: 3 years 9 months ago
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Posts: 6264

I just love you and your humor! Smile

Way to go on a great delivery! Congrats again!

rebgrace's picture
Last seen: 3 years 11 months ago
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I can't believe you were still cracking jokes during that!! Sorry you had to deal with such a b!tch during your labour, I'm sure some cranky labouring woman will tear her head off one day.:)

Great job though, and WTTW Gracie!!

angielily's picture
Last seen: 4 years 11 months ago
Joined: 03/11/03
Posts: 287

Thanks, guys! Haha, I don't know if they were as much jokes as they were cynical, sarcastic remarks, usually directed toward ole Bev. I forgot to mention, right before she granted me the epidural, I was in my room gasping, "**K...THAT...NURSE!!" I wonder if she heard? LMAO!!

Last seen: 4 years 3 months ago
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Posts: 88

But I really enjoyed your birth story - you told it so well! Congratulations on the birth of your daughter! Smile

belzy's picture
Last seen: 3 years 5 months ago
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Great story! Sounds like you handled the pain well, lol i would have had a hard time not freaking out at the nurse for denying me meds! lol The procedure at my hospital will let you have an epi at 3cm.....not that i was lucky enough to get one then lol

Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
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great birth story!!! sounds like you took things VERY well!

squirrel27's picture
Last seen: 4 years 4 months ago
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COngrats!!! I'm so glad it ended well and Gracie is here!

I have to say, I laughed sooo hard I have tears in my eyes reading your story. My DH thinks I'm nuts. I CAN RELATE to the horrible nurses ... and your writing /humor is wonderful. Thank you for sharing it in such a frank and personal way. Smile :bighug:

Last seen: 4 years 5 months ago
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You definitely have a way with words...loved reading your story! Congrats Again!

akpufa's picture
Last seen: 3 years 1 week ago
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Love the birth story Smile TFS! And what the crap is up with so many epi problems on our board?! Sheesh!! I would have seriously considered punching the nurse in the face for suggesting to go on without the epi after you asked. :mad:

I added this to your space Biggrin

Starryblue702's picture
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I think that was the greatest (and the funniest) birth story I've ever read! Congrats on your precious little girl! Hope to see you on SNL very soon!

momaof2boys's picture
Last seen: 1 year 2 months ago
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I sooo love your sense of humor---it's awesome! Great birth story Smile Congrats on Gracie!

angielily's picture
Last seen: 4 years 11 months ago
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Posts: 287 appears I have an audience!! LOL!

mgowdy's picture
Last seen: 4 years 7 months ago
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Posts: 232

Great birth story! I thought I was going to be a super b!tch myself, but the pain just shut me down until I got my epi. Sorry for the nurse you had. Karma will get her one day.:p

turtnjay's picture
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Your birth story made me laugh and cry! TFS!!