I need a 4 bedroom

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mujul79's picture
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I need a 4 bedroom

Not becasue I think I need one. All my kids share a room right now. But becasue I am going to have 4 kids and they are 3 boys and 1 girl I need a 4 bedroom.

Town said you can't have more then 2 kids in each room and same sex can't share. :eek: So if I want to move out I need to have 4 rooms, 1 for Peter, 1 for Tessa, and 1 for Heath and the baby and still have one for me. I don't even get childsupport that would cover the cost of the rent let alone all the other bills that go with having a home. Now if I bought a home you can do what you want but to rent this is the rule. :confused:

How and I ever going to move out on my own and not live at Dad's?? AS it is we are not going to VT to be with Bill, becasue of insurance and programs for Heath being better in NY. I hate that all my kids are just in one huge 200sf room in the finished basment at Dad's and I am in my childhood room with my king sized bed and the room is so small that we had to put he dresser in the closet. Anything that is not cloths is still in storage in boxes. They have 3 twin beds, 2 dressers and 2 toy boxes in the room with them an it has no closet.

I have been here 6 months and only expect to be here a short time, but now it is looking more like 2 years (when Bill gets out of the army) and I am at that stage of prego where I want to nest. I keep thinking WTF where am I going to nest I don't have room for a swing/crib let alone another dresser for baby stuff here. And I feel "or he tells me" daily how stuff of the kids is in his way and I am so ready to be an adult and make the rules and not feel like I live at home and have to follow someone elses rules.

belzy's picture
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:bigarmhug: Sorry you are having to worry about this right now, is there any housing programs you could look into using? I know in canada there are houses owned by the government and the rent is based on your income and what you can afford?

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:bighug: Sorry you are having to stress about this right now. I hope you are able to find a good solution!

mujul79's picture
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I am trying to count my blessings.

1 Heath wakes up in the am and his Chiari Malformation/sleep apnea gives me another day with his sweet smile (it has been 2 years of wondering if putting him to bed at night would be his last)
2 Bill loves me
3 I have family that can help

I just know that it is stressful on my dad to have the kids here and I keep trying to remind him when he complins that I did not ask for this, that I am making the best of it. I did not ask for the divorce, I did not ask for a special needs child or to fall in love with someone who was 3 hours away and get prego. But I am living the best I can and try to make each day a happy one for my kids. Yet inside I am stressed about how to make it diffrent and we got HUGE devestaing family news yesterday on top of it.

I get PPD and I am starting to wonder can I get it before the baby? AND if that is not what this is how and I going to be in July?

In July my X is coming to take my older 2 for 18 days Sad right at the same time that Bill will have to go back to work in VT after the baby, it also is the month that my brother goes away.

momaof2boys's picture
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Try to keep positive! I know that is easier said than done but everything will work out for you the way it's suppose to. Praying for you!

MrsHooah2U's picture
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:bighug::bighug::bighug::bighug::bighug:

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:bigarmhug:

mommys's picture
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So sorry you are dealing with all of that. I'd be looking into gov housing as well. There are no renters rules like that around here, what a pain!

Oh, and you can totally have pregnancy depression..... but that is another post.

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:bigarmhug::bigarmhug::bigarmhug:

jaimers617's picture
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**lurker**

Wow. I didn't know that was a rule! We have apartments in upstate NY and I never even knew there were restrictions like that. I know you had mentioned that your son has special needs - can you get disability for him? I don't know where exactly in Upstate NY you are, but I'm also in Upstate NY and I know there are a couple of programs that can help you. Some programs will pay the first months rent/security, some will help pay the rent, etc. From having people come look at our apartments, I know of a couple programs that will help out. If you want to PM me, I'd be more than happy to pass along the names of the places.

Stay positive! It will work out! And, like you said - you have family that can help.

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Maybe if you rent before this one is born it can buy you some time. Don't even tell anyone you're expecting. Wear some loose clothing and it's none of their business. And you certainly don't have to tell the gender of your unborn baby to anyone. That is really not 100% in most cases for all intents and purposes. Maybe give less information. Smile

I hope you get something worked out. I know it's stressful.

mujul79's picture
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"Writermama" wrote:

Maybe if you rent before this one is born it can buy you some time. Don't even tell anyone you're expecting. Wear some loose clothing and it's none of their business. And you certainly don't have to tell the gender of your unborn baby to anyone. That is really not 100% in most cases for all intents and purposes. Maybe give less information. Smile

I hope you get something worked out. I know it's stressful.

LOL I'm HUGE now the check out guy at walmart who I have never seen in my life told me congrats on my prego the other day and I had my huge winter coat on :eek:

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Yeah but still you don't have to give info. It's just NONE of their business and they can't force you to make decisions now on a baby that hasn't come, especially related to gender. Stand up for yourself.