Starting to freak out about birth process.

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SaraMeow's picture
Last seen: 4 years 2 months ago
Joined: 11/02/10
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Starting to freak out about birth process.

Okay.. so I just didn't get how you could give birth on your hands and knees so I looked up a video ... I have been meaning to look up birthing videos anyway. I kind of wish I hadn't. This sounds awful, but that was the most disgusting and horrifically terrifying thing I have ever seen. I think it would be better going into not having any idea what that looked like. Should I watch more to try and desensitize myself to it or what? I am sooooo scared now.

MrsHooah2U's picture
Last seen: 4 years 11 months ago
Joined: 01/07/08
Posts: 946

I have never seen a birth nor do I have ANY desire to! When I went in to have DS I flat out told them, I want this as G rated as possible, I don't want mirrors, I don't want to "touch his head", I want to get in and get out. DH was the same, he didn't want to 'see' anything. I wasn't even sure if I wanted DS placed on my belly after he was born, before he was cleaned up, just not my thing..

Well, by the time DS was ready to come out, I was down to a sports bra-- no blanket, they took it away-- DS watched him come out and I had him placed on my belly. :rolleyes:

With DD I have NO desire to magically 'watch' births now. I get the general idea of what happens, I have NO desire to see it. When I actually go to deliver I will tell the nurses the same thing, keep it G rated and if she's gunky please don't put her on my belly-- I don't do well with gunk :puke2: I know it sounds heartless but it's true. Not that I don't want to touch my kids until they are squeeky clean, but the thought of the fluids/bloods on me just don't do well with my tummy.

I don't think there is anything wrong with NOT wanting to sit on youtube and watch videos. Some people have a stomach for that sort of thing, but for me, it's too close to home. I would likely have NO problem watching a penis surgery or something of that nature but because I can relate to a birth video, all it would do for me is freak me out and probably make me yak! So I don't think you should "force" yourself to watch them. The outcome of labor and delivery IS beautiful, I can't say I feel that the process of getting there is. Some people will absolutely disagree and tell you how amazing birth is.. too each their own I say Smile

WonderWomanExtrodinare's picture
Last seen: 2 years 12 months ago
Joined: 05/26/07
Posts: 1192

There is nothing wrong with not wanting to watch women birth babies but I will say that I have been in the delivery room for three births (two by my best friend and one by another close friend) and I also watched my son come into the world via a mirror. When you are the one actually pushing, IMO, looking in the mirror to see your child come into the world is a bit different than seeing it from somebody else-- perhaps you are just too "in the zone" to fully appreciate it. Anywho, I thought and still think that delivering a baby is the most amazing experience ever! There are parts that are gross (like when one of my friends pooped on the table while pushing or the other threw up everywhere) but the actual point where the baby is born and comes into the world kicking and screaming is the most emotional, amazing thing to me-- what a mother does do bring that baby into the world, that whole entire 9 months, everything has led to that moment when another life comes into the world. I wouldn't watch more videos for now, I would except it into your head that birth is a natural, amazing thing that only we as women can do and sure, there are going to be gross parts but the outcome far outweighs those. Smile Appreciate what your body can do, it can be so empowering.

Last seen: 4 years 10 months ago
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I couldn't watch it in the mirror. I am able to deal with pain fairly well if I so not see the source of the pain. It's like if I see it, I know how much it should hurt. So I would not look and made them take the mirror away.

Don't feel like you need to watch a video. It is up to you. If you want to you can, if you don't want to then don't.

akpufa's picture
Last seen: 3 years 1 week ago
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

If watching it freaks you out, I'd steer clear. It isn't like if you watch 10 more that it'll change however it is going to work out for you. I'm the complete opposite & watched probably 50 before my DD was born. I wish I could've seen mine (although the episiotomy & tearing might have been more than I needed to see) but I just went into thinking that it was just something that I had to do and honestly, I was chatting with the nurses about my NEXT baby within a hour of having my DD so it wasn't all that bad clearly.

mommys's picture
Last seen: 3 years 9 months ago
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I don't necessarily like watching births, I really enjoy reading about them though. If you don't like watching, don't. It won't really make a difference for your birth one way or another. I would read a little more though about birth, what to expect, and different positions.

rebgrace's picture
Last seen: 3 years 11 months ago
Joined: 03/28/08
Posts: 596

"mommys" wrote:

I don't necessarily like watching births, I really enjoy reading about them though. If you don't like watching, don't. It won't really make a difference for your birth one way or another. I would read a little more though about birth, what to expect, and different positions.

I'm with Stephanie!! I have a ridiculously strong stomach, but I have absolutely no desire to see my own body being all stretched and bloody *shudder*. So I don't like watching either, because then I have to think about it happening to me! I love reading birth stories though.
If it freaks you out, don't watch them!! You might change your mind in the moment, but when the nurse asked me if I wanted a mirror I said "F- NO!!!" DH thought that was hilarious.

mujul79's picture
Last seen: 2 years 2 weeks ago
Joined: 01/22/05
Posts: 1843

I am the 100% oppisit of that. I had to watch I had to know what was going on. If I have another c-section they are even going to lower the drap for me so I can see him. And I am going to ask to nurse while still on the table.

With my DD I could not see but being a VBAC it was so awesome when the Dr took my hand and put it on the baby and said "that's it she is here just finishe the job" it was so just what I needed becasue I was picturning in my head pushing for hours like I had for my son. Knowing she was only mm from out gave me that extar strenght I needed.

With Heath they set up something so I could see and it worked so well, it was something to look at and see the progress I was making with each push. For me pushing hurts I had that part and I get scared but seeing them so close made me see it would not last much longer and I just had to do it. After his head came out the midwife took my hands and said you deliver him now and put my fingers under his armpits and I was the one to pull him out and onto my chest. I would have NEVER asked for that but OMG amazing.

Bill has been to 5 of his own kids and we are going to ask if this time he can be down and after the head is born lift the baby out for me.

I love the videos but I was watching them before I got prego as part of my DOULA and midwifery training.

Radavia's picture
Last seen: 1 year 10 months ago
Joined: 07/05/05
Posts: 259

I've never had a desire to watch a birth, whether it's me giving birth or someone else. I did see a video clip once that showed a newborn placed on his mother's belly inch his way up to latch on and nurse, though... that was amazing!

Anyways, I've never had the stomach for watching birth, and I've refused to look in a mirror too.

Last seen: 4 years 9 months ago
Joined: 09/08/05
Posts: 206

I agree with the others, if it bothers you watching it, then don't!

At our hospital birthing class, they showed us a couple of videos, DH didn't want to watch at all, he's pretty woosy when it comes to medical stuff. But funnily enough when it came to the crunch and DD1 was crowning, he couldn't help himself and ended up down the business end checking it out. I guess he was caught up in the emotion of the moment. I have never wanted a mirror or anything but DH did take photo's (unbeknown to me at the time) of DD2's waterbirth. He said he thought i'd thank him later for doing it and he was right.....I love looking back at them and I guess because it's not so graphic (the water skews the view a bit) it's quite tasteful and such a good memory of what went on when I was off in the zone. Smile