Babywise???? (Update)

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readytoplanmom's picture
Joined: 06/03/11
Posts: 168
Babywise???? (Update)

Anyone hear of this book Babywise? Someone from hubby's work recommended it to us and I have been trying it out for the last couple of days, but have some questions. The book basically is about how to get baby to sleep on their own without rocking, nursing, swinging, or using any props. So, I was wondering if anyone has had success with this or is it just a phase that baby goes through and will grow older and fall asleep on their own. I have given him 10min to cry and he hasn't fallen asleep for naps during the day and at night he falls asleep while nursing...

I guess my question is, if I keep the swinging, nursing, and rocking to sleep will he eventually grow out of it and fall asleep on his own? have any of you gotten your LO to sleep longer at night, he sleeps one 4 hour stretch, followed by a 3 hour and then usually every 2 hours. The book is suppose to get him to sleep 7-8 hours by 8 weeks old...has anyone gotten their LO to sleep this long this early?

9/20- Dante has slept through the last two nights from about 10pm-4am. I have been doing the feed-wake-sleep method throughout the day for the most part. Sometimes he gets fussy or won't wake after his noon feeding so I will let him sleep and then there are times that he won't really nap so all in all it evens out between awake and sleep time during the day. That and Dad has been doing an amazing job at night with feeding him between 9-11 gives him a bath and a rocks him for a few minutes before laying him down awake so he falls asleep on his own. We shall see if this continues, but it seems to be working for now.

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

I would look up babywise on google before you buy it. There has been a lot of controversy about how his methods can cause failure to thrive, and a lack of bonding between mother and baby. Now, as with anything, I think you need to use your own discretion and go with your gut. If you decide to try it, just make sure you stop or adapt if you think something seems wrong.

In my experience babies will sleep through the night when they are ready too. Some earlier than others. I am not a huge fan of crying it out though. But we did eventually try it with DS, and no go. He was 18 months before he slept longer than 2 hours in a row. What I do recomend is trying to put him down away, but drowsy. When DD nursed to sleep, I used to give her a big kiss as I put her into bed, so that she would wake a bit before going back to sleep, and Trent never goes to bed asleep, but that is just him, he wont nurse to sleep like my others did. Good side effect though, he sleeps really well!

nmpiche's picture
Joined: 08/29/07
Posts: 508

We have "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby." I like it because it has suggestions for different parenting styles. It doesn't promise sleeping through the night BUT I find Caroline and DD#1 to be "easy" if they have gotten enough sleep and that makes me a happy mom! It has guidelines up to age 18!

SunDevil28's picture
Joined: 04/30/07
Posts: 496

I have used a routine similar to Babywise with both boys and they worked great. DS1 slept through the night at 7 weeks until reflux hit bad and caused him too much pain to sleep, and DS2 slept through the night first at 5 weeks, and regularly at 8 weeks. Now we feed him between 10-11pm and he sleeps through until 6-7am. So yes, I do think it works.

Also, I am patently offended by the idea (in general, not presented by anyone specific) that I'm not bonded to my kids or that they're not thriving. DS1 is almost 4.5 and just spent 2 hours snuggling with me on the couch, and he's extremely loving in general. DS2 is very smiley and sweet. Guiding him to a predictable routine and helping him learn how to put himself to sleep without my help is my goal, and it's good for the whole family, as all four of us have settled into a routine, and we're all sleeping and happy.

I think a BETTER book than Babywise is "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" and its companion "Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems." Much more middle-of-the-road, allowing for different temperaments of parents and babies, and gives strategies for what to do when baby doesn't respond in a textbook fashion. Whereas I think Babywise is just like "Do A and B will happen", which is not much help if you're doing A and B *isn't* happening. Baby Whisperer is also good at helping establish a routine later than birth, so might be helpful for you right now, as it provides more of an idea of what to do that's not aiding to sleep or CIO.

I think you might want to establish an eat-awake-sleep schedule, which should help with feeding to sleep, as he will be full before he gets tired. And at this age, a pacifier shouldn't interfere with BF, and will help him use his naturally built-in self-soothing mechanism - sucking - without using you as the pacifier. He will learn to soothe himself to sleep, then spit out the paci and sleep nicely! We didn't have any trouble getting rid of the paci with DS1, as their sucking need tapers off at around 4-6 months (?).

As far as them just growing out of aids to sleep, I couldn't wait for that. DS1's sleep was so bad from the reflux that by the time we got him on meds, he was waking up 10 times a night. We could not continue to live that way. So I feel that "starting as you intend to go on" is really the best idea - if you start out on a routine, there are fewer problems later.

Right now, I do use swaddling and a pacifer with Daniel. I don't follow Baby Whisperer's ideas religiously - he does fall asleep in our arms or the swing or the carseat sometimes. I've just found with both boys that having a routine actually makes them *more* flexible. He does have trouble settling sometimes, and I have to replace the pacifier or reswaddle him more than once until he goes to sleep, and sometimes (usually 8-10pm) he has his fussy time and needs to be held. But he does sleep really well for naps and overnight. So I'm really happy with how things have worked out on the Baby Whisperer's techniques. We're all pretty happy and I recommend it to all the new moms I know IRL!

Good luck. Sleep deprivation is THE WORST. Big hugs.

ftmom's picture
Joined: 09/04/06
Posts: 1538

I have heard really good things about the baby whisperer. I think the problem with babywise is that that there is no alternative offered if it isnt working, and so people keep doing the same thing over and over, even though it doesnt work for their baby, and they stop looking for their babies cues because babywise is so firm on a schedule.

Hope you are getting more sleep!