How soon is too soon to start TTC again?

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homeontherange's picture
Last seen: 5 years 2 months ago
Joined: 11/02/10
Posts: 11
How soon is too soon to start TTC again?

I posted this in the "how are you doing" thread, but I thought I would make a thread for this alone.

Neither my boyfriend nor I have any siblings close in age (my brother and I are 15 years apart, and my bf is 7 years part from his brother and 18 years apart from his sister) so we had been discussing while I was pregnant how we wanted our kids to be close in age... So I am wondering (in your opinions) how soon is it okay to start TTC again?

We are not at this moment TTC again, but we did have unprotected sex 2 times, and it got me to thinking "holy crap I could get pregnant again and not even know it"

I am thinking about trying again when Christopher is 3-4 I nuts? or is that normal?

Please answer honestly Smile

mama4joy's picture
Last seen: 4 years 3 months ago
Joined: 08/18/10
Posts: 686

If you are nuts, so is my mom Smile My brother and I are 14 months apart and so is he and my sister Smile

Now, having said that, my mom did have trouble with staying healthy through all that, and my sister was not as healthy as one would like as a newborn.

I think it is ideal to wait about a year before ttc again. That way you can keep your body healthy Smile That is the closest I did it, and I had absolutely no problems Smile

I cannot believe you are already back on the DTD train, just have to say... I am still waiting!! LOL!

Mommyin0406080912's picture
Last seen: 4 years 2 months ago
Joined: 02/16/08
Posts: 1644

** Lurker** Smile Your not crazy one bit! My last 2 are almost 10months apart, it wasn't supposed to be like that but I would not change it one bit!!!!! I would do it again!!

homeontherange's picture
Last seen: 5 years 2 months ago
Joined: 11/02/10
Posts: 11

"mama4joy" wrote:

I cannot believe you are already back on the DTD train, just have to say... I am still waiting!! LOL!

Haha I guess I just couldn't help myself. Gave in at 3 weeks exactly Wink

Last seen: 5 years 3 months ago
Joined: 11/23/10
Posts: 46

**Lurker** My girls are 12mths and 4 days apart, I wouldnt change it for the world. They are the best of friends and the worst of enemies at times (they are 3&4) but they do keep each other occupied!! Also they have alot of fun together, learning new things together.

jaders's picture
Last seen: 5 years 4 months ago
Joined: 03/22/09
Posts: 87

Another lurker, but DH and I started TTC our second when our first was 3-4 months old. We knew we wanted them close, though not under a year... it worked out that our girls are a few days shy of 18 months apart, and while it has its challenges, I wouldn't have it any other way!

ETA: I pretty much followed the '9 months on, 9 months off, 9 months on again' model. I was sufficiently recovered from my first pregnancy/delivery, but the second pregnancy was definitely harder on me physically - it felt like everything hurt more and happened sooner. Might be something to factor in.

(Also, DH and his sister are 16 months apart... they were great playmates when they were little, fought like cats and dogs as tweens/teens, and are extremely close as adults. And our kids are growing up together too - it's great having cousins that are so close in age :).

Last seen: 4 years 1 day ago
Joined: 03/06/09
Posts: 1054

A few things to consider:
*Are you breastfeeding? If so, how long do you want to BF your LO? Many people (me included) have trouble keeping a milk supply when pregnant. Also, you may not be able to conceive until baby starts solids or even later.

*My 2nd pregnancy was very hard physically. My two oldest are 15 mos apart and it was tough. I love that they get along well and that they are such great friends, but it was extremely hard during pregnancy. Personally, like Jaders, I think the 9 months rule is good to follow. Your body does need time to heal even if you feel good.

*If your two LOs are 12-14 months apart, you basically still have two babies to tote around. It's possible your oldest LO won't even be walking by the time you have your 2nd. Do you feel like that's something you want to deal with?

I love that my two are very close and entertain each other...but it definitely is not easy in the beginning. While I wouldn't want them further than 2-3 years apart, 15 months was (and sometimes still is) difficult. Our youngest two will be around 23 months apart. It seems like it will be much easier, but we will see Smile

Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

My kids are fairly close together, 2 years or less. They weren't planned that way exactly and 2 were surprises. As of right now their ages are: 5.5, 3.5, 19 months, and this one I'm about to have.

It's both easier and harder. Easier in that I'm used to the routine of getting up and taking care of them in the middle of the night and used to potty training. They play together really well and enjoy each other's company. Harder in that it's really hard for me to go out in public with them alone if they are having a bad day.

Starryblue702's picture
Last seen: 3 years 6 months ago
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454


This is a question that only you can answer! You do whatever feels good for you and DH! Personally, I would never have babies that close in age, because I want to give each one of my babies super close attention, and I just don't think I could do that with more than one at a time... my sons are 2 1/2 years apart, my son and DD are almost 4 years apart, and DD will be 3 years older than her baby brother when he comes... and that's been just perfect for me... although I've been wiping behinds for nine years straight lol!

Cassandra83's picture
Last seen: 3 years 3 weeks ago
Joined: 10/01/07
Posts: 850


my 1st & 2nd - 3years apart ... I don't like the age gap and they don't get along at all
my 2nd & 3rd - 16months apart.. I feel i cheated my 2nd son out on his time with me.
my 3rd & 4th - Will be 2 years apart and i'm very happy with it.

JMO... I say after baby is at least 15months. , I wish i would have spent more time with my 2nd son.. cause it feels as if I pushed him out the way .. and he pushes his way towards me to get close to me like his younger brother and it Hurts me heart.

Give your body a break 3-4 months is early to me. Yeah its nice to have the age closeness but think about your child and how he or she will feel.
it may be easy to say oh i'll have time for both But it's easy said than done.

jep38011's picture
Last seen: 5 years 1 month ago
Joined: 02/08/09
Posts: 145

My girls are 16 months apart and I LOVE it! My first has always been really independent. There's never been any jealousy issues and they get along wonderfully. They love each other and the oldest says that the youngest came out of her belly LOL.

Last seen: 4 years 5 months ago
Joined: 01/01/06
Posts: 262

July Lurker:

I feel like I've tried about everything.
1&2 were 4 years apart
2&3 were 15 months apart
3&4 were 3 years apart
4&5 will be 2 years apart

Haven't technically tried the 2 years...but expecting it to be great.
But of the 1, 3, 4 years, I liked 1 year apart best. #1 was my shadow and I had to constantly entertain him. 2&3 are best friends--it was tough early on but then magic ever since. (Though I'm sure it would be that much harder if #4 were closer to them.)

pico83 (not verified)

I'm all for 20 month spacing. I've done it twice now and love it.

I agree, if you're BFing you need to think about that. DH and i actually tried for 15m spacing with the first two, but because of the BFing I wasn't fertile again until 10-11m PP. I'm glad it worked that way because my milk dried up right at 8w pregnant, so I got to BF my oldest for 13m. If I had conceived early I wouldn't have made it to my 1 year BFing goal.