DH's first day back to work

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Joined: 11/01/11
Posts: 143
DH's first day back to work

DH left this morning for his first day back to work and before he even left out the front door I was crying. I was back in the bedroom so he didn't see. I am just so sad for him. I know he wants to stay at home with his daughter and I. If I'm a mess over this going back to work seems impossible to me. Sad

Joined: 11/01/11
Posts: 143

How has everyone else handled this- dh going back to work?

wlillie's picture
Joined: 09/17/07
Posts: 1796

I just try to give him as much kid time as possible and handle household chores while he's cuddling or playing with our boys during the week. On the weekends he spoils all of us with attention and helps with the house/yard a lot more. When I go back to work is when the real struggle will begin for our family. Because while I know it sucks for men to leave their newborn at home, at least they aren't dealing personally with all the hormones and the sleep deprivation. I just try to remember that it's only fair we get a little extra time at home because we dealt with pregnancy for 9 months.

boilermaker's picture
Joined: 08/21/02
Posts: 1984

We are a little spoiled bc my dh is a SAHD--so it will be hard when I go back to work in August. I get 8 weeks off....which will not feel at all like enough, but since I'm on the only income, I need to go back (I could take 12 weeks, but 4 weeks would be unpaid. :() I go back mid-August.

What my dh does to make me "feel" better, is that he sends me pictures of what they are doing and keeps me posted on their daily activities, then, at least, I feel like I know what is going on at home.

Good luck! I hope the transition is smooth for you both!

jubileerose's picture
Joined: 06/12/09
Posts: 549

Aw that's so sweet you care about your husband missing baby time. I'm sure he misses you guys too.
Frankly, my husband doesn't seem to mind going to work! Work is like a frat house for him (he's a pilot in the service) and I dare say he gets to blow off steam there and chat with the guys ( and of course fly a jet). He always seems glad to go to work :/
When he's at home he tries to help... He's just not the best with home life stuff.
Anyways my husband has been back at work for a few days and I'm juggling both girls today by myself!!! So far I'm doing ok.

nea458's picture
Joined: 07/26/11
Posts: 376

Um, my DH is just not here. Been a bit emotional because my in-laws are visiting today from TX and taking back the girls for the rest of the summer. Although it is selfish for them to stay with me (I am taking away their summer because of tending to Wesley), I feel as if everyone is leaving me!

However, I will be able to focus on school and bonding more with my LO.

DH has voiced concerns over coming back and Wes not knowing him...

Joined: 05/31/08
Posts: 1131

Aw, that is sweet. It really will be OK. It is really hard at first, but it gets easier once it is happening. He will be home every night right? You'll all get into a routine. Are you also worried about being on your own during the day? I remember being really anxious about being on my own, and it is hard in terms of life being kind of monotonous and feeling lonely, but taking care of a baby turns out to be fairly straightforward Smile Make sure you get out of the house (I know, it seems impossible, but once you are actually out the door, it makes life soooo much easier...even just getting out for a walk or if there is a mommy group you can go to once in a while).

Marite13's picture
Joined: 08/07/09
Posts: 3368

My DH has had a really hard time being away from his babies... so for sure, for some men it is really hard. He's had a lot of jealousy of me staying home, and being able to spend all day with them. We are REALLY lucky that we get all summer together because DH is a teacher. But I know, I'm already worried about August when DH goes back to work and I'm home alone with both kids... I'm sure we'll adjust faster than I think...but, I'm being spoiled now, since we've got one to one parent/kid ratio, which makes things really easy now. Good luck to you...and me... and all of us! Adjusting to a new number of kids whether 1 or 2 or 3 or whatever is a challenge!

greenmylife's picture
Joined: 10/24/11
Posts: 355

"nea458" wrote:

Um, my DH is just not here. Been a bit emotional because my in-laws are visiting today from TX and taking back the girls for the rest of the summer. Although it is selfish for them to stay with me (I am taking away their summer because of tending to Wesley), I feel as if everyone is leaving me!

However, I will be able to focus on school and bonding more with my LO.

DH has voiced concerns over coming back and Wes not knowing him...

Im sorry. Sad

RebeccaA'07's picture
Joined: 11/19/07
Posts: 1628

Renea - That must be so hard for all of you. I can't imagine! When does your DH get to come back?

DH went back to work after the first week at home and boy did that first week go by quickly. I'm managing fine! It was much more emotional with DD, I was overwhelmed as a first-timer and didn't want to be alone. This time, I feel like I have things handled a lot better.

nea458's picture
Joined: 07/26/11
Posts: 376

"RebeccaA'07" wrote:

Renea - That must be so hard for all of you. I can't imagine! When does your DH get to come back?

DH went back to work after the first week at home and boy did that first week go by quickly. I'm managing fine! It was much more emotional with DD, I was overwhelmed as a first-timer and didn't want to be alone. This time, I feel like I have things handled a lot better.

Ladies, I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me...I am not going to lie, it is tough but each day it does become better! I thank you for all of your support and well-wishes, though!!! DH is scheduled to come back late October. I am going to have a professional photographer come to the airport when we pick him up (w/out DH knowing) that way they can take pics of his reaction when he sees his son for the first time!! I want to capture that "moment". Then, once he comes home, two days later I am scheduled to go to my last Residency for my Doctorate's which is a week long. We can't catch a break! But, it will give DH time to bond!!