Yay for March!

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Marite13's picture
Joined: 08/07/09
Posts: 3368
Yay for March!

Ladies, do you realize that it is now March, and our babies are due in June- only two months stand between March and June!

What do you still have left to do to get ready for this baby? What's taken care of?

How are you feeling about it all???

Personally... I'm super excited it's March, because this is the month I go home! Only 23 days now! We're going to miss my DH terribly... but, he and I have done this separation before, so I know we'll be ok. And we'll try to skype every day so DD still gets to see him. I'm just looking forward to living in the States for 4 months again so very much!

I feel like everything that needs to be done is still ahead of me... like, meeting my midwife, buying stuff (the only thing we have so far is a car seat)...I don't know...everything! I also do feel like there is a lot less I need to prepare or buy for this kid- especially since we don't know the sex. There are a few purchases we'll be making like another high chair, a second Ergo, a portable swing that are for this baby specifically, but, they can really all still wait a while!

Emotionally, I'm not going to lie... I'm having a really hard time. I am not doing well parenting DD right now- I think she's being a pretty normal almost-2 year old, and it just turns out this is a VERY hard stage for me to parent. So every day is lots of battles with her, and it's very draining for me. I'm trying my best, and doing some reading and turning to others for advice to try to get through it, but, it is honestly really starting to worry me how I'll deal with both kids once Kong arrives. I know I'll have two moths of help while we're in the States, and before my DH goes back to work- but come August, we'll be back in Laos with no one to help us and I'll be on my own at home with the two of them. I have always loved kids, have worked in day cares, etc... but this is suddenly all very hard on me. So I'm worried. I'm actually worried that I might push DD away when the baby is born, because I just prefer newborns/babies over toddlers. Sad Again, I'm glad I'll have lots of people around to help, and to give her lots of special attention.

I am however, really enjoying my pregnancy still, and SUPER looking forward to birth and having a newborn. That stuff is all my favorite. Smile

Joined: 07/27/06
Posts: 722

Im betting the next couple of months will go fast! Im so excited!

Joined: 05/31/08
Posts: 1131

I'm not actually due until July 2, and honestly I'm still kind of in denial that I will have a newborn on top of everything else come July. But I did want to say that toddler stages go by so quickly, and there is a good chance you and your DD will be in a different place by the time the baby is born, and definitely by August. The months leading up to age 3 are the hardest IMO, but once they actually turn 3 it seems to get a bit easier. Hopefully things will be different for you by the time Kong actually shows up. But I know what you mean...for different reasons I feel like a crappy parent right now. Physically it is getting really hard for me to keep up with DS, I can't play with him like I could before and I'm having a hard time making sure we get out and do fun things. We've been spending too much time cooped up in the house, but between the winter blahs that have set in for me and my reduced energy level, I just can't motivate to get us out the door! I've been letting him watch DVDs pretty regularly because I just feel like I can't deal with it right now. And I feel so guilty! But I'm hoping once spring hits it will be easier for me to at least get outside every day and he can wear himself out playing in the sandbox, swings, tricycle, etc. without as much dependence on me for entertainment.

Joined: 07/27/06
Posts: 722

All kids are totally different for what stages and ages things are more difficult and how long they stay in these stages! Take it from someone who has gone through it 8 times before...your child will not follow another child's developmental pattern as far as when they easy vs hard. Even children within the same household with the same parents and the same rules and the same everything will all be extremely different in this regard. I totally understand how hard it is...but you just have to be positive. You are soo able to do this! If you have to dig a little deeper for energy, patience, ideas on how to have fun or discipline your kids...you will do it...because you WILL be a good parent! Seriously...if you believe that you can do it...it will be fine! Smile

Kayla1981's picture
Joined: 01/04/07
Posts: 1529

Oh geez, I'm so overwhelmed when I start thinking about everything going on right now. We want to sell our house and move into one that is slightly bigger and with more of a yard. Part of me thinks we are absolutely NUTS for starting this process right now but we are doing it anyway. Because of that, I haven't even started planning the nursery beyond the beginning stages. The only purchases I've made are newborn cloth diapers, a mei tai and a woven carrier. Really, we have everything we need except for a car seat since we already have a bassinet that will be used in the beginning and all of Jordan's old clothes. It's seems silly to put together a nursery not knowing if we will be in this house for much longer.

I second a lot of what you said, Mara, about where you are at emotionally. Jordan is so much fun right now but she is also more challenging than ever. I find I'm having a really hard time knowing exactly how to discipline her. For instance, what do I do when I'm trying to change her diaper and she kicks her feet?? She kicked me in the belly one day and it sent me into tears. She needs to know that is not okay but she just laughs when I tell her not to. It's just tough age in that regard. She really wants to push the boundaries and be in control and we have certain battles that happen every. single. day. Today, in a calm voice, I actually told her she was really frustrating me and by some magic, she decided to cooperate. ??? Pure luck I'm sure but it almost felt like she knew she had pushed me to my limit and decided to give me a break.

I also worry that if I get frustrated now, how am I going to feel when I have a newborn to tend to? I won't always have 10 extra minutes to battle her about getting in the chair to read and rock before nap. She thinks it's fun to run around the room and squirm out of my lap but I have that flexibility now to deal with it. What if I have a screaming infant who is hungry and needs to be fed? Those sort of thoughts terrify me. I don't know how to be a parent of two. Sometimes I feel like I don't really even know how to parent one toddler!!!

I know many people have done this before but were they saints? More patient than me? A better parent than me? I wonder this a lot.

jubileerose's picture
Joined: 06/12/09
Posts: 549

This thread may as well be called "Toddlers"... Smile My daughter just turned two and she's a handful. She is ready to potty train but is having power struggles with me. As in, won't sit on the potty but stands up and stares at me as she wets down her underwear and pants... sigh.
She's a darling, and we are great together, but this potty training is throwing me for a loop. I'm so discouraged. I put her back in diapers and told my husband we'd try again in April. I just can't handle forcing her to do something she clearly has no desire to do yet. She turned two Feb 2.
Anyhow I'm a little worried about handling a newborn and my daughter, but she's normally a great kid and very loving and easy going. She's been sick all week so that with potty training has me completely burnt out.
I am sure this difficult two year old thing will pass. At least most the time I enjoy parenting her Smile

kristie_b1's picture
Joined: 03/07/09
Posts: 351

Oh man, Parker as a toddler is way easier than Parker as a newborn/infant. I love this age!! She's fun and interactive, she entertains herself, and she gives lots of hugs and snuggles! lol Parker as a baby just laid there, kept me up all night, and hated snuggling!! lol

Things are going pretty smoothly over here though. I get sad and lazy at times because I miss my hubby who is always gone on the road. But other than that, this pregnancy has been easier than the last one, and more fun.

boilermaker's picture
Joined: 08/21/02
Posts: 1984

((HUGS)) to those of you worried about adding to your family. I promise you, you'll will make it. There are days when it is challenging, but you will find a balance between the two and then think back and wonder why it wasn't "easier" when you only had one. Wink The only advice that I can offer on the 2 year old front is to remember that they are 2. We have a 2 year old, too....and it goes by in a flash. 2 is actually one of my most favorite ages, as your baby becomes a little person. We always PT our kids when they are 18 months-- simply to avoid the 2 year old power struggles....good luck with those!

What do you still have left to do to get ready for this baby? What's taken care of? We're supposed to prepare for a baby? Yikes! We have purchased him exactly one thing (a new baby hammock, but it has yet to arrive.) Our neighbor did drop off a carseat for us (on loan, since our bucket seat is 3 years expired....this happens when you have children over a 9 year period!) I'll start really prepping after May 19. That is when we'll return from our last hurrah of a vacation to Florida and I'll start to really think about having a newborn around the house again.

How are you feeling about it all??? Most days okay. Some days overwhelmed. This is primarily caused by my workload at the office and some things happening at work that are beyond my control. I just learned last week that one of our colleagues is leaving to take a new job, and I've been asked to apply for the position she held. It would mean a significant bump in salary, but also more responsibility and I'm frustrated with the timing of it all. There are also some politics involved (aren't there always?) and I'm just trying to decide what to do. Should I apply for my family? Or not apply, for my family? I'm not a shoe in by any means, but I'd have a good shot at the role, I just truly don't know what I want. I've been in my current position for 6 years and I'm good at it and very comfortable....but should I aim higher? So hard to decide what to do. *sigh*

Other than that, I just know that I'll have a very busy March and April with work. Things will begin to slow down in May and then we'll have babies. Incredible.

RebeccaA'07's picture
Joined: 11/19/07
Posts: 1628

So exicted that it's already March. I've found that I was super excited for the first pregnancy, willing to really let it go slow...but with this one, I know what to expect and while I really do enjoy pregnancy...I like the end result so much more. So bring on the months going fast!

What do you still have left to do to get ready for this baby? What's taken care of? His nursery is pretty much done, need to hang a couple things on the wall but furniture is set-up and bedding is all there. We have the car seat/stroller, pump, baby gear. I'm considering getting a co-sleeper that hooks onto my bed since DD still sleeps with us most nights and we need a new swing. We're having a shower thrown for us, so I figure he'll have plenty of clothes after that. Everything else can wait - I learned with DD that they really do not need much at all for months.

How are you feeling about it all??? I feel great, slightly nervous at how DD will adjust because she is super attached to me but she continually shows excitement for her new baby brother. Last night she was telling me that she can't wait to hold him, kiss him, change him, and feed him. And she wants to help him sleep! So I think the transition will be pretty easy as far as that goes. Work is crazy, that is a big stressor. I'm traveling bi-weekly right now and I'm just exhausted. I worry about the travel after two kids, it's bad enough with just one and being gone.

shroutbabymama85's picture
Joined: 11/08/11
Posts: 434

What do you still have left to do to get ready for this baby? What's taken care of?

hmm where to begin....what i have done for jayden, i moved all of his stuff into his own room. begun a deep nesting phase this week. frantically spazing to get his room the way i want it. i am amazed by all the stuff i as well as others have gotten for him so far. luckily i knew of a few girls who had boys back in sept so i didn't have to do hardly any clothes shopping. most of the hand me downs are brand new clothes their babies were too big for so it's all still brand new.

what i still want to do is pick up a few things such as a swing, bouncy chair, and decorations for his room. i need to get over the perfectionist in me and settle for something. lol. other than that everythng is done. car seat and the whole nine yards. it is amazing how fast the time flys

How are you feeling about it all???

can i just say i want to pop already...what i am apprehensive about is the whole delivery part of this. not so the delivery part i am tripping about, just the whole visitors part. with my mom and dad having a very ugly divorce i am afraid the bs drama it may bring, and so help me god that is not the time nor the place. i am verry excited for the day to come, my only other fear is having my water break at work. i've even had a few dreams that i would. the upside to it, if it does my hospital is a literally 2 minute drive. haha. i could literally hop in the car and not have to call an ambulance.

i am so thrilled to finally be a mom. i am not afraid of it at all since i helped raise my sisters when they were babies and know i will do fine. i am blessed to have a wonderful hospital to deliver at and my dh is really getting hyped as every week passes. he can finally feel the baby, talks to the baby all the time and gets giddy when he kicks back at him....i am so ready for this!!!

sometimes's picture
Joined: 07/08/08
Posts: 900

I thought I replied to this thread.. guess not!

What do you still have left to do to get ready for this baby? What's taken care of?

Honestly, it feels like we haven't done ANYTHING for this baby. By this time in my pregnancy with DD we had her room ready, painted, decorated, etc... Of course it's different this time because they will eventually share a room (we only have 2 bedrooms) and until that time he will be sleeping in our room. I have a few outfits for him... there is a consignment sale at the end of the month that I plan on getting a lot of stuff at. My best friend also plans on purchasing clothes for him as well from that sale so I figure I won't be hurting for those. I'm lucky in the fact that there are recent babies in my extended relationships.. I'm getting a nice travel system that's just over a year old, my best friend has a nice swing, plus several smaller things to give me. I have a pack n play and pretty much everything I need. She even has nice bottles.. I'll just have to replace the nipples. There are a few things I want.. a boppy, breast pump, sit n stand stroller... but I can take care of those.

How are you feeling about it all???

I totally, 100% understand how you ladies feel about having a toddler and a newborn. 2 was super easy for us... about a month before she turned 3 (on 1/23) she started getting reaaaaallly bad. Tantrums like crazy, etc. She's so defiant right now and it drives me nuts. I'd say most days she throws some type of tantrum/freak out over NOTHING, and depending on her mood it can last a few minutes to several hours. I worry so much about bringing a baby into our home.. she always talks about Mommy, Daddy and Me... she never really mentions baby brother even though I try to talk to her about him as often as possible. I just hope she acts towards him the way she acts towards other babies... thankfully I will have a lot of help the first couple of weeks after being home so I hope that helps the transition. Anyways.. I'm also looking forward to just having the baby... although I REALLY want to make it til 37 weeks. A full term baby would be lovely!