for BTDT moms with more than one.....

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PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857
for BTDT moms with more than one.....

At what point would you consider putting a bunkbed in a child's room? We are planning on redoing DS's room before baby comes and we were offered a futon bunkbed from the MIL. I LOVE the bed and its big on the bottom for DS who loves a "big bed" but at the same time.. I am not ready for him to be in a room with a bunkbed. (yet that is in the room he sleeps in at his Mom-moms. I'd rather him just have a twin for now. but I hate to pass up on the futon bed bc its a NICE one. What would you do??

LaurenE's picture
Joined: 06/19/10
Posts: 854

How old is he? My son has one and got it a 7, but I think he would have been fine a year or two earlier. We just had ground rules about it and it's never been a problem. We started with it against a wall and a rail on the other side.

PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857

He's 3 now. his birthday is in July

LaurenE's picture
Joined: 06/19/10
Posts: 854

Hmmm, 3 would have been young for my son, but it really depends on how your son would act. Would he sleep on the bottom and stay off the top? I would be a little nervous putting a bunk bed in a 3 yo's room.

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

I LOVE futon bunk beds!! They are the best. Anyway, I don't think there is a right or wrong to this... just what you feel comfortable with. It depends on how the parents feel and the personality of individual kids I suppose.

That being said... this is what we have done in the past, and what we are "currently" doing. My first two started sharing a room when my oldest was 2 and the younger one was 14 months. No bunk bed at that point. We got a futon bunk bed when we were ready to put # 3 in the room with them. At that time we put my 3 year old on top (she is a wild sleeper and can't really sleep with someone else) and my 5 year old and 20 month old slept on the bottom together. We kept that sleeping arrangement for a year and it worked great. Then we moved. In our new living situation we actually had three bunks stacked right on top of each other. My oldest was on top (6 years old), next one was in the middle (3, turning 4), the next oldest was on the bottom (2 years old), and the baby slept in bed with DH and I. We did that for about a year. Then we moved again. Now, in our current house we have two "regular" bunk beds in the girl's room. My two older girls each have one of the top beds, and the younger two each have one of the bottom beds. They were 7, 5, 3, and 20 months when we started the current sleeping arrangement. It has been that way for a little over a year now and it works great for us.

But again, ultimately it boils down to what you feel comfortable with and what you think is right for your kid/s!

sandraleigh's picture
Joined: 11/23/06
Posts: 2672

We got my kids bunkbeds this past June when DD was about to turn 5 and DS1 was 3. My 3 year old sleeps on the bottom though. Obviously they play up on the top bunk, but as far as sleeping, I was not really comfortable with younger than 4-5 to sleep up top.

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

I agree with what's been said about it depends on how you think he'll act. I'd put my 3.5 year old on the bottom no problem knowing she wouldn't climb up there if I told her not to. But not sure my DS would be as compliant even if he was that age because the temptation would be too strong. Is there anyway to set it up without the top on yet? I know a lot of bunk beds break down.

PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857

possibly. He would sleep on the bottom and not the top which is what he does at Mom-Moms. However I am fearful we would end up with our first broken bone...because though we tell him NOT to go to the top... Im sure he would. It would be nice to have it for when company comes there would be a bigger bed for company. but Im not sure where to go with this one Sad

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

Honestly, I wouldn't put bunk beds in DD's room but she's a little younger than your son. She is a very cautious child, but still!

Is there anywhere you can store the bed for a few years? Can the top bunk come off and be stored while he uses the bottom?

blondiess4u's picture
Joined: 11/08/07
Posts: 1450

My DS1 will be 5 in May and we are going to get him a bunk bed this year for his room. Our plan is to have DS2 (16 months) share a room with him when he turns 2, but I still think it might be alittle unsafe that young. 3 is young for one but not unheard of. I would get it anyways and you could always use it when he's older.

Joined: 10/12/04
Posts: 961

Mine got bunks at three and five. This year (five and seven), they each got a loft. So now they both sleep on the top. No issues with inappropriate climbing or jumping. When Lucas was three, he would sometimes want to go sit up top with Tori but it was rare. He never fell. No broken bones here! At least, not from the beds. Tori fell off a slide at the playground when she was four and broke her elbow.

PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857

I would love to be able to get it and store it.. the issue there is if we get the futon MIL wants the 2 single beds we have back. which means we will still need to get a bed for DS. (I dont want juste the bottom. I'd like to have a twin bed in his room for now. I honestly don't know how well the futon bed woudl fit.

mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

:lurk:
does the ladder come off? if so just don't put up the ladder...

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

We had old bunk beds that could be separated to be two singles...but they were old and wood.

Personally, I hate futons. I can't stand sleeping on them!!!! Hubby had one when we met but it didn't last long as he wanted me to stay over and I just couldn't get comfortable on that thing!

You could always store the frame and throw the futon mattress on the floor for DS to sleep on. VERY safe being that low. Blum 3

quonsetmom's picture
Joined: 10/10/12
Posts: 1559

"Heatherbella" wrote:

Personally, I hate futons. I can't stand sleeping on them!!!! Hubby had one when we met but it didn't last long as he wanted me to stay over and I just couldn't get comfortable on that thing!

I agree with traditional futon mattresses. I bought one with an innerspring and its more comfortable than most mattresses others like (as i have a ultra soft mattress with a pillow top lol). right now im on my futon mattress with a memory foam on top of it and it makes it pretty good Biggrin tho i miss my bed.

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"quonsetmom" wrote:

I agree with traditional futon mattresses. I bought one with an innerspring and its more comfortable than most mattresses others like (as i have a ultra soft mattress with a pillow top lol). right now im on my futon mattress with a memory foam on top of it and it makes it pretty good Biggrin tho i miss my bed.

A memory foam topper will make anything great! Our trailer mattress was total garbage so we got ourselves a memory foam topper and it's SO nice. Our main mattress is just all memory foam!

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

Futons with thin mattresses suck big time. However, if you get a nice thick mattress they are quite good.

No issues with my kids on the top bunk. In the beginning I just tell my younger ones to stay off, but by about 2.5 they are totally fine to go up there. They "know" how far they can lean and be safe and such. If you really don't want your son on top though, I think you can totally train him NOT to go up there. The day it arrives you simply tell him, "You can't go on top." So, you put the thing together, talking about how awesome his new bed is, and then you keep throwing out every now and then, "but we don't go on top yet." Now of course you know he is curious, and if he is use to "testing you" then he will absolutely still try and go on top at some point. So, you just make sure that whenever he is anywhere near that new bed that you are also there. The second he starts to climb you immediately get him down and there is an immediate consequence (important, give NO warnings... you already made it very clear the first day that he is not to go on top). If he tends to be a button pusher, you will probably have to stay on him like a hawk at first and make sure he is never alone with the bunk, because if he "gets away with it" for awhile even once to get on top, you lose your effectiveness. So, stay on him like crazy at first, then gradually give him some time alone (but try to check in very frequently at first). If you do catch him on top just immediately discipline again and go back to watching more closely. HOnestly, if he is use to getting away with stuff this might take awhile for him to know that you mean it, BUT if you stick with it it will absolutely work. If you are fairly consistent with discipline already, it shouldn't take all that long.

Anyway, just my style, but I don't avoid much of anything (other then I DO keep cleaning products locked and out of reach... that's not something to mess around with). I simply tell my kids what they can and can't do and then follow through and they know I mean it! Smile They do still test me occasionally to see if I mean it (hey, don't we all), but for the most part... they listen!!

Joined: 10/12/04
Posts: 961

I agree 100%. We do very minimal baby proofing and just teach our kids from the day they can roll/crawl around what they can and can't touch. It's worked well. I stopped lighting candles and keep meds and cleaning supplies out of reach and lock the knife drawer. Otherwise, they just learn "No way, buddy!" Real quick! Smile

Clarkton's picture
Joined: 01/07/08
Posts: 1972

DH and I haven't begun planning how to fit everyone yet. Aside of we already know we'll have the baby in our room for the first 3 or 4 months, at least. I'm really thinking after that, we'll get a bunk bed for the boys and have my oldest on top. They will be about 3 and 5.5 at that time. I wouldn't have a problem with putting a bunk bed in either of my boys room after age 3 but wouldn't probably let them up on top unsupervised or to sleep until 4 or 5. I think my 4.5 yr old would be fine now though.

PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857

We were at MILs today and I went and looked at the futon/bunkbed again. (it's been a while since I ahve seen it.. and even longer since I paid attn to it) The top half comes off so we could leave it unbunked. I think though that what we will do is put the top part in DS's room. and the futon (which folds out to full size almost) in baby's room. so It can be a couch in there and If im too tired I can jsut sleep there without having to walk back to my room. (which isn't that far..but when exhausted its like a mile!) Then when the boys are bigger we can bunk the beds. I was talkign to mil about it and told her that my biggest concern with taking it is that Ben will learn to climb to the top ladder or no ladder, and that while he is only using it for short periods of time at her house, itd be full access at ours.. She then admitted that he already knew how to get on top... apparently his cousin taught him already..... I love the idea of having somewhere to sleep in the nursery. (or even for company at first (baby will start off with us for a few weeks at least) )