Nope, I really wanted to last birth and even met with one but as always my procrastination got me. I didn't make a decision or get one set up before I went into labor. It's just really not in the budget this time. I think it's a great idea though.
Yep, I like to do my own thing to. I don't mind having my DH and the midwife there. In fact, before things get really intense (in the last half hour) I like to talk and joke around a bit. However, DON'T give advice or make suggestions to me. I like to just do my own thing. I remember toward the end of my last labor (about 15 minutes or so before Aidan was born), the midwife suggested that maybe I should sit up a bit to let gravity "help." At the time I was very reclined on the bed, and I did NOT want any help from gravity. Things were moving along JUST FINE!!!! I only get into the bed when I know things are close (so I knew I was almost there). Well, 15 minutes after she made that comment, Aidan flew out like a torpedo (he never really crowned, and he didn't have that phase with just the head out - his entire body FLEW out onto the bed). As he flew out onto the bed I was seriously thinking, "See, things were just fine!"
I had DH and my mom with me last time. Not sure what I will have this time since the midwife will be there the whole time too. It was good because they could take turns digging their elbows into my back during the back labor, and my mom could help me relax and focus and meditate a bit. My SIL had a doula the first time for her hospital birth which she really liked, but didn't use one for her homebirth the second time around.
This time around I don't know what I will have/want. Now that both DH and I have been through it, it's quite different. And then of course I need someone with DD (unless it's at night again and then she can sleep through the whole thing - that would be funny!)
Thanks for all the opinions. For me, this is like my first birth as I didn't labour or anything with DD. I get that for your 2nd, 3rd, 4th baby you know the drill and what you like/don't like. I honestly have no idea! I'm reading books on birth and learning natural birthing techniques, but I don't know that I'll remember all that in the heat of the moment. Also, I'm not really sure of DH as a 'coach'. What does he know? I have no clue, I guess I should ask. He was there for DSD's birth 16 years ago but I'm pretty sure he wasn't the kind of support I'm wanting. (he was a different person back then).
My mom and I aren't close in the way that I'd want here there. We aren't touchy feely at all. I guess I sort of wonder what services a doula would provide that my midwife doesn't do. I know the doula is more about feelings and the experience...but I'm not a super spiritual person anyways. I guess I just think if a doula can make the whole thing easier, it might be worth it. I just don't know if it's worth the expense.
To be honest, I will probably try for natural this time, but I don't want to get my hopes up. I felt like I failed last time in having to take the drugs, but they gave me two doses of pitocin and wouldn't let me walk around because I was premature and hooked up to internal monitoring machines. I had to beg them to let me take a shower for 5 minutes.
Prior, I had been practicing and studying Hypobirthing, relaxation techniques, etc.
I just don't want to get my heart set on something that might not happen. Also, now that the OB has me scared about having a C-section because of the possible size of the baby, I'm all freaked out.
I know I have a propensity for big babies ( I was 10lbs 10oz - natural birth, DS was 6lbs 8 oz at 5 weeks early and the doctors said he would have been closer to 11lbs at term) and that scares me too.
Well we'll see. I'm just going in with no expectations, but truly hoping for no c-section.