Feeling Sad over second baby

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elleon17's picture
Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
Joined: 01/26/09
Posts: 1981
Feeling Sad over second baby

So don't get me wrong, I am beyond thrilled to be pregnant and having our second baby!!

But, I'v noticed that I'm getting a little sad for DS and myself and thinking about how these are the last times that it will be just him and I with no one else to need attention. I know that my love isn't in question, but the time factor is, especialy being WAHM.

What I am excited for is to have DS home for 2 1/2 months of my maternity leave before he goes to preschool. I haven't been able to do that yet.

Last seen: 3 years 4 months ago
Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

Yeah, I think it's natural to feel a little sad over that. He will lose more of your undivided attention, but he will also gain a sibling which is a huge gift. Everything in life is give and take. Sometimes there isn't necessarily a good or bad to something, just different.

In my case I'm so far from that... I wouldn't trade what I have for anything in the world. The relationship that my kids have with each other is the greatest thing any of us could ever ask for!!

sandraleigh's picture
Last seen: 3 years 1 month ago
Joined: 11/23/06
Posts: 2672

I had a hard time with that when I had my 2nd. I felt so conflicted, like I couldn't spend enough time with DD because I was too busy with baby. She was only 18 months old. Now DS2 will be 18 months old when new baby comes and I know I will have similar issues, even though my two older kids will be able to help out and spend time with DS2.

Just make the most of these last months together! Also, make sure you plan for special times with just you and your boy after baby arrives. Mommy-son dates and even Daddy-son dates can make him feel special and appreciated, even just little things like going out for a doughnut and hot chocolate. A new sibling will be an adjustment for him but such a blessing too!

nidia's picture
Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 06/08/07
Posts: 1812

It's bittersweet for me too. I'll miss just giving DS all the attention and hope that he won't feel left out. But I know having a sibling will be such a wonderful reward. He will love it and he already talks about his brother all the time! So I totally understand how you feel. I'm excited that DS will be out of school a little after DS2 is born and we will get to spend some time together while I'm on maternity leave!

gardenbug's picture
Last seen: 2 years 1 month ago
Joined: 03/12/07
Posts: 2025

As I watch my daughter's children interact...even the battles!... I am so thankful they have each other. Her 13 year old stepson really needs to have these siblings, and the younger ones are devoted to each other too. The giggles and squeals are fantastic. I think riding through the car wash with them the other day was the highlight of my visit!

One thing to remember though, don't neglect DH in the mix. He too can feel ignored.

quonsetmom's picture
Last seen: 1 week 3 days ago
Joined: 10/10/12
Posts: 1559

I am kind of there. I feel like this pregnancy has taken away from dd. tho she has been super spoiled by the in laws!

Last seen: 2 years 12 months ago
Joined: 10/12/04
Posts: 961

Watching Tori go from being my baby girl to a big sister was very bittersweet. Letting go of the life we had known and adjusting to our new roles was very emotional. But sooooo worth it! They are inseparable now and it's the most precious thing in the world.

angelover02740's picture
Last seen: 3 years 1 month ago
Joined: 07/10/07
Posts: 1342

DS never was one for to much attention he could always entertain himself, but he is a big cuddlier and im going to have to try very hard to continue to give him that. He's a mama's boy so i dont think if i said go cuddle with daddy that will fly well so i think daddy will have to interact with the baby more when we're together so DS can still get that cuddle time.