Thread: When to tell siblings?

We have been telling DS that if he wants a baby brohter or sister that he needs to start using potty ALL OF THE TIME. DH even told him at one point he'd bring the crib back down bc babies pee in their pants. Tonight DS came up to me and told me to go upstairs and get the crib down bc he wanted a baby brother and sister. and he told me he'd help bring it down. When is hte best time to tell the little ones? we are thinking of telling my parents/brothers next weekend bc we will need mom to watch DS on a day I'm off and I have no good excuse for why. AND we thought about telling DH's parents/ brothers the beginning of Nov (when the family is together. ) I don't want to tell DS and then ahve something happen, but at the same time once family knows he's going to hear it. I have no history of m/c and I do not think anyone in our family has had any, but I also know it can happen to anyone.

SO For those that are not 2nd times moms.... when is the best time to tell the little ones?

The best time to tell them is when you want everyone in the world to know! Honestly, toddlers can't keep a secret to save their lives! LOL.

DH has said things to K about 'babies pee in their pants' and stuff like that. I really don't like the 'shame them' sort of sound of that. I prefer to put the BIG KID spin on it...emphasize the positive, not the negative. Know what I mean?

It think it's cute that DS wants a baby. My DD has never even mentioned it or considered it to be possible I don't think. Some of her friends have siblings...but I guess she doesn't know she could too. LOL

I think right before or right after you tell the rest of the world because, yes, they will tell everyone!!

I dont' think ds has any concept of it. I've been talking to him about it for awhile but he doens't show any sign of understanding so idk

There was a young girl at church that had a baby last year and she lieks to just dump her with the babies great gradnmother and disappear for weeks at at time (to go work in the strip club and party every night) so my broher and his girlfriend take the baby to give the great grandma a break. the last 2 times they brought him over DS asked to help change him. (and he keeps kissing my belly..maybe its intuition?)

I remember with my first couple babies after the first, my other ones didn't really "get it" anyway. With the last couple I had, I waited until I was out of the first trimester (wanted to avoid dealing with losing a baby as much as possible), and I was ready for everyone else to know! Last time was pretty easy to keep it secret because I didn't even go to an appointment until I was 18 weeks along. My kids always go with me, so I just said, "let's see if there is a baby in mom's tummy." Of course the midwife got out the Doppler and we heard the heartbeat. It's going to be hard to keep it from the kids this time. My 8 year old is no dummy, and I'm already going in tomorrow to have blood drawn... They will NOT be going to the early ultrasound with me though.

Thats cute that he is asking for one! DS1 was to young to really know when I was pregnant with DS2, but now he is 4 and would know if I said I was pregnant so we are waiting to tell him until we want everyone else to know. He would be so excited he would go to school and tell everyone!!!

Originally Posted by blondiess4u

Thats cute that he is asking for one! DS1 was to young to really know when I was pregnant with DS2, but now he is 4 and would know if I said I was pregnant so we are waiting to tell him until we want everyone else to know. He would be so excited he would go to school and tell everyone!!!

The problem is he's asking for TWO!

Ds1 had just turned 2 when I got pregnant with DS2. I told him right away because he liked to come running up and jumoing on my lap when I was playing on the floor with him and just explained that there was a baby in there and that he just needed to be careful with my belly. When I got prego with Dd (#3) Ds1 was 3.5 and Ds2 was 9 months old. Ds2 didnt get it, and Ds1 was juat like been there done that. He did tell me that it was a girl and that she would be our princess. And he was right This time Ds1 was 5, Ds2 just turned 3, and DD was almost 20 months old when I found out. Dd didnt quite get it, but gave my belly kisses every now and then from the beggining. We did explain to the boys that there is a baby in my belly, and that we were waitibg to tell people, so it was our secret. I also talked with them about how some babies are meant to be here with us, and some are meant to go to heaven to live with god that. We were waiting to tell people till we knew where this baby was meant to be.

I got pregnant with DD right before DS 1st birthday, I don't even remember telling him. I'm sure that once my tummy started growing, we probably just told him that there is a baby growing in mommy's tummy. DH asked me last night when we would tell them this time. They have both been asking about babies (they want me to have one boy and one girl, so they can each have a baby!). We will probable tell them right before we tell everyone else. For them May or June seems like a lifetime away, so the longer we can put it off, the fewer times we have to hear, "when will the baby be here?".