Who's Still Keeping the Secret??

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akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078
Who's Still Keeping the Secret??

Sandra's post got me wondering how many of us have spilled the beans and how many are still waiting??

We haven't told "the world" yet but have told quite a few people. Our parents, close friends, and DH's extended family we recently vacationed with. I keep postponing it, but I'll probably email my extended family and spill the beans on FB this week and get that out of the way now that I'm hitting the 2nd tri.

LaurenE's picture
Joined: 06/19/10
Posts: 854

About the same as you, Ashley. We haven't told the world, but our immediate families, close friends, and people who see us all the time know.

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

We haven't really told anyone. It sucks. My mom knows and a handful of friends. MIL doesn't even know...or my dad. I'm tired of keeping the secret.

The CVS results should be in by the 19th at the latest...then we will tell everyone...I'll be 15 weeks. Sigh. This sucks.

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

"Heatherbella" wrote:

We haven't really told anyone. It sucks. My mom knows and a handful of friends. MIL doesn't even know...or my dad. I'm tired of keeping the secret.

The CVS results should be in by the 19th at the latest...then we will tell everyone...I'll be 15 weeks. Sigh. This sucks.

:bigarmhug: Sorry sweetie. I'm curious why you guys haven't told your MIL or your dad? Would you just rather they not stress about the results too or is there another reason?

Momma Leah's picture
Joined: 05/13/12
Posts: 1047

I haven't told the Facebook work yet. My mom was supposed to give my brother his card yet. So I'm not sure if he knows. Once I know he knows, I will have a subtle post on Facebook and see who catches on. I don't feel obliged to even say anything on Facebook, but I guess I will. If I could keep it an absolute secret, I would. But, it is nice lot having to worry about hiding it!

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"akpufa" wrote:

:bigarmhug: Sorry sweetie. I'm curious why you guys haven't told your MIL or your dad? Would you just rather they not stress about the results too or is there another reason?

My dad and I aren't close...and we rarely see each other. My parents divorced when I was 4.

As for my MIL. I don't think my MIL will react well if the CVS results are bad. Hubby thinks I'm making it all up and that she would understand. MIL is very bossy, stubborn and old school. She loves DSD unconditionally despite her severe mental retardation. I just don't feel like re-living a could-be bad experience over and over for my whole life as she reminds me about it. She just doesn't let things go. What I will do to myself will be bad enough, trust me. Sad

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

Heather: makes sense. That's a heavy burden to carry but I understand your not wanting to let her get worked up if you think she will unless absolutely necessary. Can't wait to hear your good results soon so we can ALL breathe a sigh of relief for you! :vibes:

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"akpufa" wrote:

Can't wait to hear your good results soon so we can ALL breathe a sigh of relief for you! :vibes:

ME TOO! I'm pretty positive that they will be good...but if they are bad it will probably be the worse day of my life thus far...so I'd rather minimize the impact on that one.

sandraleigh's picture
Joined: 11/23/06
Posts: 2672

I just made the Facebook announcement an hour ago. PHEW! ALL OUT!

Joined: 10/17/12
Posts: 62

Well, since we told DS, everyone in his little world knows!! His entire school and his hockey team. Our friends and family all know. The only ones I'm keeping it a secret from are my students. I teach at a college, and I have 2 weeks until the students are gone, then when they come back after christmas break, I'll let in on it.

quonsetmom's picture
Joined: 10/10/12
Posts: 1559

Lol. I was out to the world 2 days after getting my BFP! when i had the blood results. Smile

Joined: 10/12/04
Posts: 961

21 days until we tell Jon's family. 27 days for mine (because my family is doing Christmas late). 28 days until we tell the Facebook world--that is my home school group, my church, college friends, any family that doesn't show up on Christmas...

We don't see family much so it's not hard.

Church is getting difficult. My dressy clothes aren't very stretchy and I am struggling. Plus I have felt just terrible being up that early so I'm pretty miserable when I'm there. I've started just trying to avoid everyone.

Joined: 08/25/10
Posts: 385

We told immediate family weeks ago. And now we're starting to tell extended. I'm pretty much at the point where if anyone asks, I tell. I just don't announce it to people for no reason. But I gave my MIL the go ahead to tell her sisters and stuff. We still have to tell hubby's grandmother. I'm kind of avoiding it since she's the type to call around and tell the whole extended family. I just don't like people talking about me a lot. I don't get out much though, so it's not like a million people are asking lol. And although for me I'm showing, I can easily hide it still if I wanted to.

angelover02740's picture
Joined: 07/10/07
Posts: 1342

same thing, havent told the world but immediate family and close friends know, 4 co-workers at work know, i plan on announcing it on FB when i hit 12 weeks

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

I'm so glad I'll be out by Christmas though...

Joined: 06/08/08
Posts: 498

We made it "Facebook Official" today after the good ultrasound! haha

sandraleigh's picture
Joined: 11/23/06
Posts: 2672

Ain't nothin official til it's Facebook Official!

My Facebook announcement has 72 likes and 67 comments. LOL

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"sandraleigh" wrote:

My Facebook announcement has 72 likes and 67 comments. LOL

YAY for lots of likes and comments!!! Warm fuzzies!

I was thinking of doing a Christmas related announcement on FB since it will be almost Christmas when we tell. I had a friend of mine put a santa hat on my u/s picture. LMAO, it's cute in a cheesy sort of way. I'm going to do more work to it though and make some sort of announcement. Maybe something like this:

Christmas Pregnancy Announcement Digital Card 4x6 by SprinkledJoy

or this:

Ultrasound pregnancy announcement cards Christmas cards for announcing pregnancy

I haven't decided yet. I would have been nice to mail something like that out...but by the time I get the results, it'll be late to mail cards.

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

Ahhhhhhhh, I'm almost sad I deleted my facebook account... no not really!! I guess the world will just have to find out the "old school" way - when I tell them and the word spreads! Smile My family knows. DH's family does not - that's up to him when to tell, maybe Christmas (they won't be visiting though). Actually I don't think we will be seeing any of his family until after the baby is actually born... Oh it would be so cool to just call them up when the baby is here and tell them!!!!!! Ah, I would love it!!! My kids know, so my oldest will start telling her friends over the next week or two, which will lead to everyone find out... plus, I'm getting a belly!

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

Heather, I hope you don't mind me asking, but is there a certain "percentage" chance that the doctors gave you of your children having the same condition that your SDD has? I know with all the various genetic conditions out there, there are different percentage chances of them occurring depending on what it is.

Joined: 06/08/08
Posts: 498

Heather- that's such a cute idea!

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

"sandraleigh" wrote:

Ain't nothin official til it's Facebook Official!

My Facebook announcement has 72 likes and 67 comments. LOL

Awesome! Most of my FB friends are still wild and single and probably will just glance at it and think "Ashley having another kid?! Jeez!". :rolleyes: LOL So my kid/pregnancy news is usually only popular with my small percentage of mommy friends

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"pollo_la" wrote:

Heather, I hope you don't mind me asking, but is there a certain "percentage" chance that the doctors gave you of your children having the same condition that your SDD has? I know with all the various genetic conditions out there, there are different percentage chances of them occurring depending on what it is.

Oh, I don't mind you asking! Ask away!

So what DSD has is a deletion in a part of her 22nd chromosome. DH and DSD's mom have both been tested and neither of them is shown to carry the deletion. Because of that they call it a 'de novo chromosomal deletion'....what that means is it is "A chromosome abnormality which has not been inherited", or just a freak occurrence. DSD's mom has 3 kids from three different guys and DSD is the only one with the condition. Prior to K being born, DSD was DH's only biological child...so although they SAY it didn't come from him, they can't prove it to 100% so we qualify for the genetic testing. In all honesty, the chances are pretty much zero to none that baby will have it. With DD I was WAY more freaked out about things as it was something on our minds since we started dating. Can DH father a 'normal' child? Now that we have DD and she's fine...we aren't as scared.

Chances are everything will be great! YAY!

This is what DSD has: What is Phelan-McDermid Syndrome?

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"akpufa" wrote:

Awesome! Most of my FB friends are still wild and single and probably will just glance at it and think "Ashley having another kid?! Jeez!". :rolleyes: LOL So my kid/pregnancy news is usually only popular with my small percentage of mommy friends

I would 'like' it. Blum 3

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

Heather, thanks for the info!! Yeah, it sounds like there is a GREAT chance you have a nice, healthy baby in there!! :woohoo:

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"pollo_la" wrote:

Heather, thanks for the info!! Yeah, it sounds like there is a GREAT chance you have a nice, healthy baby in there!! :woohoo:

Yes! I know! It's so great to feel positive this time!

DH also talks about what an easy laid-back baby DSD was...hardly every crying, just going with the flow. It was good at the time but in hind-sight it wasn't normal. She has never been 'all there'. He was happy to see baby bouncing around at an extreme rate on the u/s last week. He figures if that had been DSD she would have just ignored the poking. LOL. So ya, we're pretty sure everything will be fine. Smile

Momma Leah's picture
Joined: 05/13/12
Posts: 1047

"akpufa" wrote:

Awesome! Most of my FB friends are still wild and single and probably will just glance at it and think "Ashley having another kid?! Jeez!". :rolleyes: LOL So my kid/pregnancy news is usually only popular with my small percentage of mommy friends

Most of my Facebook friends who would care already know!

PatienceW's picture
Joined: 08/06/08
Posts: 857

Most people know. we announced on facebook on the 30th. work knows and soon my students will know (they are starting to stare at my stomach) . I had a parent ask me today (she is my homeroom mom) how far I was. She said she knows I didnt look like "that" (and nudged towards my belly) when she was in 2 weeks ago. She also said she's at an advantage bc she's a labor delivery nurse... so she recognizes it quicker. so its a matter of time before others notice too!

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

I just dropped the news on FB. DH sort of accidentally told someone at his office yesterday who will probably spread the word like wildfire so we figured I'd better get on it. I hate that moment you have to his "Post" haha

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

"akpufa" wrote:

I just dropped the news on FB.

Woooo hoooo! I was your first 'congrats'! GO ME! Blum 3

.hilary.'s picture
Joined: 01/31/10
Posts: 1505

We have told the world, lol. Heather, that sounds SO promising!! I have my fingers crossed for you but it sounds like you probably don't need it Wink

Heatherbella's picture
Joined: 02/14/05
Posts: 4169

I just told one of my 'low risk' high school friends. I'm dying to tell people...so I'll just tell someone every few days to help myself not go insane. LOL! Anyways, she is very excited. We are the same age but her oldest is in grade 9 and her youngest is in grade 2 (she has 3 girls). So ya, super fun to tell someone!