Discipline question JULY 2008 - Page 2
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Thread: Discipline question JULY 2008

  1. #11
    Posting Addict SaucyVidel's Avatar
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    Yes, we use no and redirect a lot, but kids will be kids. I try not to overdiscipline, which is essentially becoming a broken record without any real authority. I pick and choose my battles, but we do a LOT of redirecting and the occasional diapered butt swat when my older daughter is being belligerently disobedient. But with little babies like Lilah they aren't *trying* to be bad, just figuring out the world, so I am judicious with my discipline but firm on a few key points, like messing with electronics or the stove.
    Taryl

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  2. #12
    CourtneyS
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    I keep lit candles on my coffee table and the boys know not to mess with them If I can trust them around fire then I can trust them around decor..

    The other day Alos therapist was trying to get him to blow the candle out and Kaia was telling her no that he couldnt do it.. So he knows FWIW Alo never blew the candle out


    Teaching them limits is also teaching them privacy.. You cant keep everything away from them.. What will they do when they are older? They will think they can get into everything.. and like you said.. other peoples houses... As far as pet food...I have no advice the boys messed with mine. The most fun for them was putting the dog food into the water.. I just dealt with it and cleaned it up all the time. That was one of my losing battles

  3. #13
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    What do you do about things like cat litter or cat food?

    I keep the cat food and litter in the basement to keep the dog out of it mostly. But I have also put it in an unused half bath with a kid gate across the door. I just raise the gate about six inches off the ground so the cat can go under but nothing/no one else. Once baby is big enough they learn about not touching that stuff. I am just extra paranoid about the litter and what they might put in their mouth!
    Brandie (32) DH Paul (31)
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  4. #14
    Mega Poster newcalimom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emilys3Guppies View Post
    We call it the Penalty Box (we're hockey fans).
    ha ha, my parents called it the penalty box too! My brother spent a lot of time there.
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  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by thrashej View Post
    "Pretty soon you'll have to clear everything off all your tables" etc. I mean, I know I have to do this to some extent but I have talked to other moms who seemed to be able to maintain their home decor
    That depends on the child too sometimes b/c my mom was the nick/nack queen - there was something on every table, shelf EVERYWHERE and she babysat my nephew from the time he was a newborn and he never touched anything - he just wasn't interested - my nieces were another story - she didn't move everything but it was a process getting them to leave stuff alone.
    -Pamela


  6. #16
    cindy1
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    I just use no and redirection. Primrose is 2.5 now and won't touch things when she is told not to. I do time out for her in her bedroom, but I didn't use it until she was 2. She ate (dry) cat food a few times but grew out of it.

  7. #17
    Prolific Poster ~Serendipity~'s Avatar
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    What do you do about things like cat litter or cat food?
    cat litter and food is in the basement so they can't get to it. Dog food/water is up here and when Noah starts crawling the bowls will just get picked up when the dog isn't using them. If the cat litter was upstairs I would just put a baby gate in the doorway of that room.
    Christina
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  8. #18
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    I've always done the "No" with redirection as well. But if you have a stubborn child who will not give up the curiosity of some object I do hold the object for them to look at it or touch until they tire of it. And sometimes if it's something important to me, I will just remove or relocate the object until they understand the boundaries.

    Quote Originally Posted by blueyesongod View Post
    I believe it will be Daddy's job to spank (yes, we will spank) when Brayden is of the age to do things intentional, but not for mundane things.
    May I recommend that if you choose to spank as a form of discipline, not to designate one parent to discipline? If a child does something wrong only in your presence, it is best practice to discipline the behavior immediately instead of waiting for someone else to discipline for you. You will gain respect from him and he will listen to you better having it come from you as well. It also eliminates undue stress for the child in the anticipation of being punished when the other parent gets home and may invoke fear of the other parent because of this. Instead, you'd want the child focusing on the poor behavior and why it's wrong. I hope I worded this correctly as I don't want to step on toes or have you feel like you're being attacked in any way as I am not intending this at all. I'm just speaking from personal experience and what I've learned throughout the years.
    Tracey

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  9. #19
    Emilys3Guppies
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beertje View Post
    If a child does something wrong only in your presence, it is best practice to discipline the behavior immediately instead of waiting for someone else to discipline for you. You will gain respect from him and he will listen to you better having it come from you as well. It also eliminates undue stress for the child in the anticipation of being punished when the other parent gets home and may invoke fear of the other parent because of this. Instead, you'd want the child focusing on the poor behavior and why it's wrong. I hope I worded this correctly as I don't want to step on toes or have you feel like you're being attacked in any way as I am not intending this at all. I'm just speaking from personal experience and what I've learned throughout the years.
    I agree. For discipline to be effective, it has to come from both parents. Children should not be fearful of one parent because they do the "dirty work"...that will only end up with children who learn that they can get away with things with one parent, and who are fearful of their other parent. And it can lead to resentful parents too...resentful that the child won't listen, and resentful that they have to always play the 'bad cop'.

  10. #20
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    I think you guys might be missing her point of it (designated spanker) only applying to intentional stuff done at an older age - the idea is if both parents are consistent with whatever form of discipline they use, they arent' using it over and over again so it doesn't lead to new problems - and the "bad cop" won't be resentful if they accept that role. I will probably "tap" Savannah, but if she needs a spanking, it will come from her dad!
    -Pamela


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