Really sorry for such a random post and hope I don't offend anyone.
I just wanted to know how you survive with such large families?
I am so desperate to have a big family, but it's just no do-able.
Do you have any advice?
Me - Kristi, 29
DD - Leia, July 5 2008
I luurrrrrve to lurk!
I don't have a big family but I came from one... some of the things my parents did..
-buying in bulk
-family vacations were always camping
-fixed things that broke
-large garden - then canning/freezing stuff
as the kids got older they were expected to get jobs and pay for clothing and other things that weren't essentials
Sean (38 )
Robbie (8 )
Bailey (April 2, 2011)
"The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind." Caroline Myss
It starts as a priority. I love kids, I knew I wanted a lot of them, so I behave accordingly. We make decisions monetarily with the idea of "how will this affect us if another child is born" I buy in bulk, and cook frugally. I rarely food already made because I can usually make it cheaper myself. We use hand me downs a lot.
We say no to ourselves a lot too. I might "want" this or that, but when it comes down to it we're going to make the decision that is best for our family.
Also, some may not agree with me, but with every child that we've added to our household, the blessings that have come along with that child have far outweighed any thoughts of being unable to afford them. With each additional child we've welcomed, dh has gotten a pay raise, or someone we know has been getting rid of this or that which we needed, or whatever seemed to be the things we were most in need of has all worked out. We work hard to make things work, and we are blessed with what we are in need of still.
Are we rolling in $ to afford 5 kids? No, but we have sufficient for our needs. We have a home to live in, food to eat, clothes to wear, and we even have several things that aren't necessary, but are nice to have.
dh ~ Jacob
dd ~ Ruth(11), ds ~ Jotham(9), ds ~ Caleb(7), ds ~ Evan (4), ds~ Ted (2)
Well, having babies for us is not a huge financial burden because we use cloth diapers and nursing, which cuts out two huge expenses. In the home, we use cloth napkins (haven't bought a package of paper napkins in over 5 years), cloth towels instead of paper towels most of the time, home cooked meals from scratch (with some pre-made items like fish sticks, chicken nuggets and frozen pizza). We don't go out to eat a lot, and when we do, we don't buy soft drinks for everyone.
All of our clothes are hand-me-downs, thrift store purchases, or clearance sale items. We live on a strict budget and don't buy things we don't need unless we budgeted for them. For instance, the kids get a small monthly allowance and are able to go to the store and buy something they want or to save up for more expensive items. We don't buy them toys, etc., except on their birthdays or Christmas.
We also go camping for vacations and take food with us to cook, though we budget some money for eating out, particularly in the event that it rains. My kids don't have cell phones. The older boys do have a computer and 2 Nintendo DS, all of which they saved up allowance money to buy.
When they get older, they will be expected to get jobs if they want to be able to buy a car, brand name clothing, etc., and to pay college expenses.
My kids don't have a lot of things that other kids have, but they are so happy and carefree, they don't feel deprived of anything.
Deb ................. DH Norm
DS Caleb, 13 ...... DS Patrick, 12
DS Isaiah, 8 ......... DS Thomas, 7
DD Cherish, 6....... DD Emily, 7\18\13 ....... Ripple, 17
William, 14 weeks, 4/11/12
Hand me downs, We live in a small-ish house, Dave Ramsey-like living, no credit cards, I don't buy stuff for myself (Like, I don't *need* the latest handbags/shoes/clothes)...Things like that.
Dylan 4/22/04, Devon 6/24/06,Dorothy 9/13/07, Derek 12/19/09, Daniel 12/18/10, Daphne 2/24/12
Mindie and Mark, 5/16/09
Some stuff I can think of right off the top of my head:
*no debt (this includes no credit cards and no car payments)
*none of the kids go to daycare (there would be NO way we could afford that malarky!)
*we don't use any disposable paper products (except toilet paper...lol)
*i cook from scratch (no processed convienience foods...and we eat out RARELY)
definitely very doable!
Wife to Jason
Brodie(9)~Deacon(8 )~Truman(8 )~Sawyer(5)~Elliot(3)~Finn 3/9/12
Yep-- like the others.
* I plan every meal and shop once/week. We only eat meat a few times/week (mostly bc I will only eat free range/organic meats and we can only afford those a times/week)
* We have a SAHP-- my dh, so no childcare costs
* We carry no debt other than our house.
* We don't have cable television
* We're resourceful-- we fix things ourselves, we do activities that are free
* We use cloth everything, like others, diapers and napkins
* Our kids aren't in 47 extra-curricular activities-- I don't think any 2 year old needs gymnastics or any 4 year old needs to play soccer-- we play with the kids ourselves and save the cash
DD 8.03, DD 6.05, DS 3.07, DD 5.09, and DS arrived 6.17.12
I can't really add much! You ladies have made great lists! The only one I can think of too is make things ourselves too. (I think someone had that on thier list). Right now we are making a bunk bed for our boys. It is actually costing us about the same to make as a really cheapo one (walmart quality) but it will be very sturdy and last many years and be safer.
Like everyone else said!
Budget and coupons! I try to only buy what I have a coupon for other than meat and produce! We don't buy new cars and never pay full price for clothing or toys. Garage sales, kids sales, hand me downs, thrift stores! I buy the kids all new shoes and socks and underwear but I do payless when it's buy 1 get 1 half off and you can use that on clearance shoes! But really if you budget and spend wise it all works its self out!
Pretty much agree with the other ladies. Babies for us are super inexpensive because I nurse and we cloth diaper, but once they get older. The kids are limited to one extracurricular at a time and always will be. I personally think it's probably better that way anyways because I don't want them overscheduled (nor do I want to overschedule myself!).
Meal planning saves us big, I don't know, you just budget what you have. We do have two car payments and our mortgage, plus a student loan for me....I'd love to be without them but fortunately we're still comfortable where we are at with them.
DD1- July 2004
DD2- April 2006
DS1- December 2009
DS2- August 2011