I let the cat out of the bag and....

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Joined: 12/10/05
Posts: 1681
I let the cat out of the bag and....

As expected we got pretty mixed responses. We just told family at this point.

Our kids are excited (as much as you can when your 6, 5, 3, and 1) Smile
My mil was happy (but did ask "if it was planned")
My brother was happy ("good thing you bought that big house!")
My bil claimed he knew we would have another.
My mom and sister were surprised, but supportive.
My dad, ummm, not so much. He actually seemed a little mad ("your done now right???")
And best of all, my Oma, "What??? Oh. Really??? Well, I guess it is the Lords will and you'll manage") :rolleyes:

Good grief.

Oh and my Oma has 5 kids, ironically.

Lots-o-Tots's picture
Joined: 01/29/06
Posts: 574

Wow. Sigh. Chin up, my dear. It stinks that other people's opinions mean so much to us, huh?

Joined: 12/10/05
Posts: 1681

And to be honest, I don't really care what they think, I just wish they would keep their thoughts to themselves. I'm mean, I see plenty of people make decisions that I wouldn't, but do I voice my opinions? No, I keep them to myself. You know, because it is polite.

Sigh.

I wish it could have been just my happy little secret for a bit longer, but alas, baby #5 doesn't stay hidden very long!

Joined: 12/01/05
Posts: 1000

Maybe your Oma felt like it was challenging to raise 5 kids? Or maybe she got the impression somehow that you didn't want another? It's kinda funny how people are. I have one friend that, when she found out about our #4 and #5 said, "That's a lot of kids." At the time, she had 7. lol. At least now you don't need to worry about trying to keep a secret anymore.

Joined: 12/10/05
Posts: 1681

I thought that too. My Oma had 5 kids in 6.5 years (mine will be 5 in 7 years).

They were dirt poor immigrants trying to make a life for themselves. They didn't have plumbing in the house (in the 1950's) and life was hard. Everything they ate, they grew and canned themselves or they would have starved. My mom remembers Oma canning entire deer :eek: Can you imagine water canning a deer? Each batch would have to boil for hours!

So ya, her life was really different from mine. And she probably didn't have access to birth control and have a choice about how many babies she had. Really different from my situation. Pretty much the opposite actually.

But, still... I'm probably a little sensitive because her reaction to me getting married was "NNNOOOOOO.... NOOOOO..... OHHHH NOOOOO!!!!!" and this seems a little too close to that.

Joined: 12/01/05
Posts: 1000

Well, she should be happy that you're happy. It must be beyond disappointing that she isn't.

My grandmother raised 13 kids during the depression without a husband. My dad told stories about how they would eat corn meal mush every day for lunch and dinner, then they would let it sit overnight and slice it and fry it in the morning for breakfast. If they were lucky, they would have lard and sugar to spread on top for a little treat. My mom's family was a little better off. They would get one piece of meat for dinner, which was fried up for the dad. The drippings were served to the mom and 9 kids as gravy over biscuits. I don't think we realize how blessed we are these days. Most of us wouldn't survive a week back then.

Joined: 01/25/02
Posts: 2023

Sorry that you didn't get a great response from your Grandma.. some of that comes with old age, I swear. My grandma says things that really tick me off sometimes... they just lose all tact once they hit 70. lol

toothy35's picture
Joined: 02/20/06
Posts: 4578

sigh is right.....i got very similar responses with my 5th......and i "tried" not to let them bother me...but they did!!!!!LOL!!!!!!!! ((((((HUGS MOMMA)))))) 5 is fun!!!!

Sarah-Jean's picture
Joined: 10/25/01
Posts: 1335

Well, we're all happy for you! Smile And you're happy for you. And the rest will come around soon enough! Smile

ashamom27's picture
Joined: 07/06/06
Posts: 1010

Ditto what Sarah-Jean said. We are all happy for you and we know what you are feeling, having gone through it ourselves. Hug!

MrsSchepp's picture
Joined: 12/30/06
Posts: 496

Ugh! People can be so...ugly...yuck Sad

BFrantz's picture
Joined: 11/14/11
Posts: 86

I had so many people say "If you have anymore I'm going to kick your ***" Oh and the classic "So you're getting your tubes tied after this one right" and the ever lovely "Are you done yet"

I developed what I like to call my off the wall smarty pants reply system, oddly enough even though i am not pregnant and never plan to be again i still have to use them ..

My favorite is "Oh I forgot I use your uterus to grow my children"

I believe everyone is entitled to have as few or many children as they want, if you only want 1 cool, if ya want 50 that's a lot but good luck anyway!

I really am done having kids, im hoping my junk poops out soon so I never have to worry about it again, but I do plan on adopting some kids after I'm done with college. I don't want babies though, I want them at least potty trained and talking. So my done isn't the equivalent of I won't call another child MINE .. and if anyone doesn't like it .. well too bad for them because I happen to be one heck of a mother and all children should have a super mom like me! *my opinion but I like it*

So congrats to ya, happy healthy 9 months!

lil96's picture
Joined: 03/27/06
Posts: 573

Lurking
maybe it is a German thing? Lol my kids Oma (my mil) makes that sort of comments all the time. She never said any sort of congratulations for this one (I am only on my 3rd!) she said things like, "better you than me." She didn't even ask for his name until he was 2 wks old. I wanted to see how long it would go before she would ask. My husband brought the baby up (by name) in conversation. Her response was like what? huh? what are you talking about? my husband, my son! mil, but that isn't even a name. I could go on about stuff in general about her, but specifically with the too many kids. she is truly horrible. My husband grew up hearing, no one should ever have more than one kid. ... he is the 2nd. you were a mistake, we went on a cruise and forgot condoms, and I got stuck with you. just when I was getting able to start my life over...
she has said on several occassions to me that I should convince my husband to get the big snip, "it doesn't hurt." (umm how does she know?) she has continually told me I should be done having kids or else I will ruin my life. I will never have fun in life because I will be taking care of kids forever.... the things she says go on and on.

If I could I would have tons of kids just to spite her!

congratulations to you and your family!

Joined: 07/27/06
Posts: 722

Awww..Im so sorry you didnt get the responses you wanted...but it sounds like most of them were good!! If my ultrasound today goes ok...Im going public by the end of the week. I have a hunch that my responses will be the same or worse than yours. My moms was already pretty bad...no congrats no excitement...nadda! We are all so happy for you here though!! good luck with the rest of the pg!!