The kids are asking for a new baby. DH is completely open to having another next spring. And suddenly I'm the one hanging back. I've always been the driving force behind TTC before. What's going on? With the others I was pregnant again by now. DS3, at almost 13m, is talking more than DS1 did and walking more than DS2 did, but still seems like such a baby to me. Is it the prospect of having four kids at home? I can handle my three, but it's crazy at times. Especially when DH has to work long hours. I already almost never get a break. This afternoon they're all asleep at the same time, which happens once in a blue moon (pretty much literally, DS1 usually doesn't nap anymore). The house isn't clean. There's laundry to put away. I need a nap. I have no idea what we're doing for dinner. I've barely gotten to talk to DH this week (those long hours I mentioned). And I'm considering adding another? Am I crazy? Almost everyone I know (the excepting being my mom) would say yes.
And yet... I would cry is DH said he never wanted another. I love how they relate to each other when they're close in age. They are all wonderful, happy, healthy kids, and I often get compliments on their behavior.
Why is it such a hard decision? Maybe because it seems like it's a great idea for everyone except me.