Working vs family

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Joined: 11/30/08
Posts: 225
Working vs family

Hi Ladies

My little boy is 17 months old. I have been a full time wife/mother since half way through my pregnancy when I had to quit work because of complications and then stayed out of the work force until 3 months ago when I went back to work full time.

I love working. I always have. And I'm good at it. Our budget is completely on DH's salary, so my income goes 90% (minus 10% for tithing) to our Dave Ramsey baby steps.

DS is doing wonderful since I've gone back to work. He stays with a lady down the street that adores him, along with another little boy his age. He gets a more structured schedule, play time, outtings, and interaction with other kids.

We were planning to have our next child soon. But now I've gone back to work. We feel we are making excellent progress toward providing a better financial foundation for our family (paying off debt, getting a six month emergency fund, and saving towards purchasing a home). I don't want to quit work, but I was able to stay home for so long with our first baby I would like to be home for at least several months with our next. Two reasons to put off having our next child.

I can't decide if we are making a good decision for providing for our family, or if I'm being selfish for not wanting to quit. Any thoughts? Opinions? Church references?

mom2robbie's picture
Joined: 01/20/07
Posts: 2541

Marie, I can't really help as we get a year maternity leave here. I wish I could be a SAHM but when I stay at home for extended periods of time my depression gets so much worse. For me it is better to be working. I was supposed to be working part-time at my new job but we were given the choice to go full-time. It has allowed us to pay down debt and hopefully purchase a house soon.

Joined: 09/02/05
Posts: 994

I feel that this is a personal decision that only you and your Dh can make. Having said that my opinion is to not put off having kids unti the situation is "right". I firmly believe that if we will do what we have been told (multiply & replenish) that we will be blessed. I have seen it in my own life. We have six children and I have been a SAHM since DS #1 was born. By choosing for me to stay home with the kids we have been blessed beyond measure. There has always been enough money to provide for all of our needs and many of our wants, including purchasing a home.

We are also doing DR and have a LOT of debt (student loan & home equity line for an addition), and even though we don't have the extra income that I could possibly bring in we are paying debt down quite fast. You can still work through the baby steps if you were to stay home for a while, and while it may take a bit longer you will be home with your LO.

Good luck with your decision. Decisions whether or not to have another baby are quite difficult.

Joined: 10/21/03
Posts: 172

I agree with Janae Smile I can't tell you what to do because it is a personal decision between you, your hubby, and Heavenly Father. But I can tell you that we've been greatly blessed by making the decision to go ahead and have babies even when our financial situation wasn't optimal. I've been a sahm since dd was born, and we've had lean times, but we've still managed to live within our means, and pay off the debt that we had. We've chosen to live in an area where we can't afford to buy a house, but we've been blessed with finding housing at an amount which still allows me to stay home with our children.

GL Smile Take it to Heavenly Father in prayer as a couple. You'll be able to decide what it right for your family.