Hitting, pushing, misbehaving, etc...

6 posts / 0 new
Last post
fudd8963's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 1630
Hitting, pushing, misbehaving, etc...

Do your LOs do these things? UGH, I don't know what to do, especially about Brooke. Like today, I drop them off at daycare and the girls and another little girl are doing puzzles at a table. A little boy comes in and walks by Brooke. She takes her puzzle and hits him with it. Out of NOWHERE! I was shocked and so was the little boy. It breaks my heart to see them being mean to others. Just yesterday I asked the teachers if she hits a lot, because she does a little at home, but I always ask them if they were good at school and they tell me who hit, who got in trouble, and Addison said how Brooke hit the other day. The teachers said sometimes it's almost like she doesn't want people in her "space", and sometimes it is in self defense.

Do your LOs hit, etc...? How do you deal with it? Right now we take them away from the situation and explain to them why they can't do it and they aren't allowed to play again until they appologize. But it's obviously not working too well. Any tips?

RebeccaA'07's picture
Joined: 11/19/07
Posts: 1628

Kaylin hates when other kids get in her "space". She is a total touch-me not unless she initiates the contact. There is a little boy at daycare that constantly gets in her face, not being mean but because he has no personal space boundries. The other day, Kaylin asked him to please move and he didn't so she shoved him out of the way. I don't feel in a situation like that she should get in trouble, at 3 - after asking they really don't know the next step. So we explained to her why we don't hit and left it at that.

So in our situation it IS a total space issue. Kaylin rarely hits until someone gets in her "space". Which I can understand! We're trying just to talk it through and hope that it clicks.

zoe08's picture
Joined: 09/09/08
Posts: 665

Mason hits, and I honestly do not know what to do about it. When he gets mad he will hit or throw things. He gets in trouble when he does this and has to sit in the corner and then go apologize, but he still does it over and over. Really hoping it is a phase he will outgrow very soon!

kirsteng's picture
Joined: 10/19/02
Posts: 644

Grady's not in daycare, so he doesn't interact often with other kids his age. Only when we go to the playground, really. In those situations he's usually so thrilled to be around other kids his age that he's never aggressive. Other kids are, in fact he's often pushed and confronted by other kids, but he tends to react by bursting into tears and running over to me for support. (Did I mention that he's my little lamb??) :sleepyboy:

With his siblings on the other hand, it's a totally different story. They tease him often enough, and get physical with him on occasion, so he doesn't hold back whatsoever. Someone throws a little toy at him? He'll find something big, stomp over and whack them in the head with it. He rarely hits unprovoked though, so I'm not too worried about it. If both kids have thrown something or hit (even if Grady's was bigger/worse in retaliation), I send them both to their rooms for a few minutes of time out. Then they apologize to each other. With Grady, that works - he's not resistant to direction. With our eldest Kieren, that technique didn't work at all.

I think the key is not to get visibly upset/surprised/shocked/horrified by what they've done - it gives it too much excitement. Instead strive to be consistent, sympathetic, and even a little bored by it all... like 'I know it's not fun honey, but every time we hit/hurt someone else, we have to go in our rooms for time out... I know you'll choose not to hit next time'.

That said though, at this age I think it's the norm rather than the exception to whack at each other! Wink

fudd8963's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 1630

Glad I'm not alone! Not that I like to hear other kids are hitting too, but you know what I mean. The girls are both SO different when it comes to "punishment". Addison will MELT down into a pile of tears if/when you "scold" her. Brooke on the other hand, I swear she just looks at you and laughs like "Whatever, I'll just do it again." I love her, but man she is a tester of limits for sure!

rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809

Jakes not a big hitter, but that's not to say it's never happened. Just the other day Drew came and told me that he hit him in the face. So I went and took Jake to timeout. I had him sit there for a few mins and then I talked to him. Asked him if he hit his brother (he never lies, always fesses up! lol), asked him why he did it and if he thought it was a nice thing to do. After we've talked I have him apologize to whoever he hit and they hug and kiss.