Stupid things your DH has said......

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rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809
Stupid things your DH has said......

I figured this might be a thread that gets a lot of action! Some place we can all go "Did he really just say that?!"

Tonight DH comes up to me and says "Babe, I already know how you are going to react, but I wanted to say that if when I cleaned and helped you out, if I was to be rewarded, I might be inclined to him more" SERIOUSLY I looked at hime like he was stupid and told him that I wasn't going to give rewards out to a grown a$$ man that was suppose to help with chores to begin with! I said I don't see you paying me to clean your s*it stains out of the toilet! ...he started laughing and dropped the subject Smile

Joined: 06/10/07
Posts: 1692

Oh boy, Rachel! You made a GREAT point!

Hmmm - where to start?!? I'll have to share a story or two on this thread! Wink

fudd8963's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 1630

LOL! That's a good one, and I LOVE your response!

rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809

LOL I'm so pmsing...so I've been in rare form lately Tara!

RebeccaA'07's picture
Joined: 11/19/07
Posts: 1628

Ha! That's funny!!

Wes says stupid crap all the time, and most of it's just funny.

We've been doing the 30-Day Shred, getting up at 5am, working out...then getting ready for work. A couple morning's ago, we were doing jumping jacks, well my shirt kept riding up of course...and he told me my belly was jiggling. Really. Thanks Mr. Beer Belly, you're one to be talking. Logically, I know he was just trying to be funny...but um, yea...not funny at 5am!

Joined: 01/11/05
Posts: 326

I have a big booty and DH once told me "Other guys might not like your big a$$, but I think it's hot". Ok?? Was that supposed to be a compliment?

rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809

"Pammi41125" wrote:

I have a big booty and DH once told me "Other guys might not like your big a$$, but I think it's hot". Ok?? Was that supposed to be a compliment?

Seriously?! I think he should have gotten punched for that one!!

boilermaker's picture
Joined: 08/21/02
Posts: 1984

You girls are cracking me up.....oh my. Good thing we love our men.

Joined: 01/11/05
Posts: 326
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"rachelperry1983" wrote:

Seriously?! I think he should have gotten punched for that one!!

Not that I can mount much of a defense for him because what he said was rude, but I will try:

1) I do have a big butt
2) He said it in the 90s (remember that song Baby Got Back) when big butts were sexy
3) He's stupid

Joined: 03/22/07
Posts: 259

"You don't look as fat in that skirt as some girls do!" - I mean, really? :rolleyes:

jessianne223's picture
Joined: 09/10/08
Posts: 121

This is awesome.

Although I cannot think of anything dumb Matt has said, and trust me, there are plenty, I can however think of what my sisters husband said to her. We cannot quit laughing.

Ok, so she was talking to my mom about how amazing Jennifer Lopez looks on Idol, like going on and on about how beautiful she looks, her hair, makeup, everything. My mom says to her "well, if you had people doing your make up and hair, and all those clothes, you could look just like that", of course, typical thing for a mother to say. So later on, my sister goes home and tell hers husband (whom is over weight and not judging or really trying to be mean) that she was telling mom how beautiful JLo was, and yadda yadda yadda, and that mom said she could look just as pretty, and her husband was not really paying attention and looked at her and said "Oh yeah, Your FACE is pretty as hell", and he was using his finger to outline circle his face over and over, like FACE, not body. It was hilarious to say the least. She was like, ok, I got it, my FACE is pretty, but not my body. It was funny.

I'll come up w/ something DH said soon enought.

rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809

OMG seriously!!!! these are cracking me up! I mean I could update on this thread daily!!

rachelperry1983's picture
Joined: 04/13/07
Posts: 809

So last night I went to dinner and a movie with some girlfriends and DH had all the kids. I was reminding him what needed to be done (because it's not often that I'm not there). He had gone over to a friends house so all the kids could play, I nicely reminded him that it was a school night and that they needed to be home at a decent time. He says "You act like I've never been a parent (coming from the man who use to wait an hr or two after Jake woke up to change his butt), Rachel, I can do this, just have fun. I said "well remember to not stay late". I got home at 9:45pm and he STILL WASNT THERE! OMG I was livid. Makayla was so tired that she passed out, Drew and Jake were so cranky as it was way past their bedtimes. I said "wtf, it's 9:45pm, what were you thinking" ......."OOO I didn't know it was 9:45". And he WONDERS why I have to instruct every little freaking thing......

onetiredmomma's picture
Joined: 12/08/06
Posts: 46

There are so many... The best was probably when he (completely sober, mind you) asked me why my hair didn't look more like Faith Hill's. Stupid men. I could have socked him for that one, but I didn't! Smile

fudd8963's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 1630

"onetiredmomma" wrote:

There are so many... The best was probably when he (completely sober, mind you) asked me why my hair didn't look more like Faith Hill's. Stupid men. I could have socked him for that one, but I didn't! Smile

You should have asked him why he doesn't look as good as Timmy in a black cowboy hat! (yes, Tim McGraw and I are on a first name basis!!! LOL, I wish!)

gardenbug's picture
Joined: 03/12/07
Posts: 2025

Like this one of Faith? LOL

kirsteng's picture
Joined: 10/19/02
Posts: 644

Those are really, truly hilarious! Smile Love them!!!!!!!!!!

You'd think that after 14 years together that I'd have a ton.. and I really should, but the problem is that I forget everything. Wink The only one I can really think of is that DH has this habit of saying "he/she is about my age"... or "he/she is from the same generation as me"... we're only SIX YEARS APART in age! Yes, I'm older than him.. but that does not make us from a different generation for crying out loud.. and I think he could say that people are about 'our' age. What the hell's widdat??? %($*!!!! Wink

fudd8963's picture
Joined: 12/27/07
Posts: 1630

I'm sure DH has a lot, but only two are sticking out right now, and they are both from the same day!

We were looking at pictures on the computer. I was sitting on the chair and he was standing over me. We were looking at pictures from my jaw surgery. It was a picture PRE surgery, in the pre-op room. He said "Wow, look at how swollen you are there!" Me: "Um, that's before the surgery." DH: "No it's not, look at your face, it's so pudgy". Me: "No, look at my face, there are NO bruises and I am smiling. We also are in the pre-op room." DH: "Oh yeah, it's just a bad angle." Good try! Then like 5 minutes later, he asks why some of the highlights in my hair go all the way to the roots, and others don't. Me: "The ones that go all the way to the roots are my grays". Yeah, he was lucky I was in a good mood that night, or else he would have been on the couch!