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onlyn2urmoney's picture
Joined: 11/15/06
Posts: 152

How does everyone deal with them?

Were going through them to the extreme and its all day! At home he gets mad over nothing and kiks and screams on the top of his lungs and even throws his body on the ground. If I walk away or igore him he just follows me and insist on throwing the tantrum at my feet. And its even worse in public! If I dare let him walk on his own he runs everywhere and doesnt listen to me. When I try to pick him up or tell him he cant do something I get the same terrible screaming, kicking, and body on the ground. Its so embarrassing. I hate getting the looks like I cant control my child. I would love for him to walk and explore but he just wants to run off and get into stuff hes not supposed to do. Im so lost on what to do?!?

Kayla1981's picture
Joined: 01/04/07
Posts: 1529

We are definitely having a battle of the wills about many things lately. She has thrown her fair share of tantrums lately too. I am going to find some books to read on this b/c I think that will help but I'm starting to implement time outs again. I tried them a while back w/o much success but it's time to try again. I got some good suggestions on another board. I'll link it below...


Joined: 09/29/09
Posts: 1346

I think one of the biggest things is to be consistent. The rules need to apply all the time no matter who is around you or where you are. Don't be embarrassed to correct him in public the way you would at home.

With Luke I have found he responds much better to touch than voice when I correct him. If I am on the couch and he starts climbing the tv stand it will not work for me to say 'no' from across the room. I get up hold him firmly and look right into his eyes and calmly say 'no'. I will hold him in place for maybe 15 seconds and quietly tell him no several times and then I let him go. Sometimes I have to repeat it 5 times. This technique works wonderfully with him. Kids KNOW if you are being serious. Be calm, firm, and consistent.

Remember too to have realistic expectations. When they are this little they are easily distracted, impatient, and dont have much self control. If a situation is too much for him you should take him out of it. Don't fight with him or give into his drama. I would calmly remove him from the situation. If you are at home I would completely ignore the tantrum. He wants your attention and to suck you in to his drama. When he is done with his fit then its time for hugs and love and finding him a fun new activity.

I don't know about other 18 month olds but Luke would not understand punishment or timeout at this point. He does great with immediate gentle correction. I can't wait for him to be old enough to explain what behavior is expected from him. For now what I described above is working great for us!

Joined: 02/26/07
Posts: 186

I agree with Carolyn that consistency is key. Doesn't mean that they are not going to still try.

I find that Keegan throws more fits when he is not feeling well.

There would be NO way I would let Keegan walk in stores yet! IMO there are just too many temptations and I would constantly be telling him no to do something and I am certian that he would also try to run and probably throw a fit if I made him stop. So, I have not started that. I try to hand him things that he can not get open to let him play with (or throw on the ground and laugh!) Or hand him things and tell him to put them in the back. Makes him feel like he is helping, and actually that is what the girls do too. Then they don't get too bored and start acting up. They usually do pretty good in public.

Marite13's picture
Joined: 08/07/09
Posts: 3368

Beni has been doing a lot of hissy fits lately. She gets SO ANGRY so quickly if she can't do something that she's trying to do herself, or if you won't give her or do something for her when she wants you to. For now, we generally smile at her, tell her to calm down, and then slowly help her or whatever. If we're out in public more often than not we use distraction. She often wants to walk in the store and pull stuff off shelves, but usually if you just pick her up she's struggle and then when you distract her, she'll be ok. But I guess we haven't had full on temper tantrums that much. If we're at home and she's being ridiculous, I will just let her cry on the floor, if she wants, meanwhile telling her that I will help her when she's ready.

reeveslady's picture
Joined: 11/23/05
Posts: 1423

At home, we let Eve have her fit in the middle of the floor. If she's not someplace where she'll be safe, we put her somewhere that is and just let her get her emotions out. At stores, she has to stay belted into the cart or be carried. If we let her roam around the store, she'd take everything off the shelves (just like everyone else!). Thankfully, we haven't had any knock-down-drag-outs in the store, but if we did, I'd just let her cry and make a scene while holding her close (she responds really well to a good hug). People can think whatever they want, but she's only 18 months and doesn't understand that we don't just go throwing random things in the basket and that there really is a decision process in everything we buy.

Joined: 05/31/06
Posts: 4780

My boys have never had tantrums, but my DD used to, for a really short phase right around 15 or so months. We just let her go and tried not to giggle at her too overtly. When she didn't get the response she sought, she pretty much gave up on that as a workable threat, and was over it by 18 months or so. There was no changing her mind or cajoling her out of it when she was all worked up, so we let her be. Eventually she would just walk back to us and say "I'm all okay now" and that would be that. We never, ever gave in, that helped her see the futility of tantruming.