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Thread: How do you plan on spilling the beans?

  1. #11
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    Ok, ok... First I want you all to know we love our son and wouldn't change it for the world, but starting out it wasn't planned and it wasn't pretty like pregnancies should be. so here goes,

    I met DH IRL just after my 19th birthday, we had talked online for the longest time (met on myspace) He annoyed me endlessly online and I had blocked him and unblocked him several times, he wasn't mean or anything just mildly argumentative (one of the qualities I like about him now). I was still living at home and staying at my dads house one night and was bored and asked him to come over as he was bored and lived only a few blocks away. We hung out and talked and junk. It was fun. We moved in together the next month, we both needed a new place to live and it just sort of happened.

    While I liked him, I knew we weren't serious. It was about May, and I realized I hadn't had my period in a while (and I was forever bad about taking my pills.) I told my stepmom (cause she is pretty decent to talk to without being uber-parental) I thought I might be pregnant... I didn't tell DH right away because I was slightly afraid of what he would say. The week after I told my stepmom, DH and I were having an argument about something or another (prolly picked by me because I admit preggo hormones made me a B**ch.) I was leaving to go to my parents house because I was so mad, he fallowed me outside and I screamed "OH BTW IM PREGNANT!" I swear the entire block prolly heard. He made me go back inside, and we finally had the discussion. (I never took a pregnancy test I just knew)

    I was 19 and didn't really want a kid, and DH was of the midset that having a kid was a terrible idea, so we decided I would get an abortion. I am Christian, but I am also pro-choice I have my reasons. So I set up an appointment for the next Saturday. I went to Planned Parenthood, feeling ok about the decision, then they pulled me back and during the ultra-sound, they asked if I wanted to see, which I agreed to. That sealed it, the little blob had a heart beat! I couldn't abort, at that moment my entire world shifted. I got off the table and they took me to talk to the counselor, the first thing I said after introductions was "I can't do it, I don't need the services." I was fully prepared for her to talk me into it, BUT SHE DIDNT! She was supportive of my choice (which is contradictory to what I had heard of those types of places! and made me like PP as a whole) she asked me if I had a support system (which I do, my family) and asked if I needed help getting in contact with resources, she gave me a picture of the ultrasound, as I left the clinic I said a prayer for her, she is a wonderful person.

    I went strait to my dads house, and told them what I had just done, we talked for a while, and I eventually texted DH (who was at work at the time) that I didn't do it. He asked me to meet him up at work (we were both working at the same place at the time) so I did. It turned into an awful fight in the parking lot, I hit him in the face after he tore up my ultrasound pic, the guards came over and asked if we needed to call the cops. So pretty all around. I picked him up from work that evening, we waited until we got home to talk. He brought up adoption. I told him that he didn't have to be involved if he didn't want, I wouldn't press for child support.

    He told me he guessed he would stay. and he fallowed it with if it wasn't a boy he wasn't telling his family (though I think he was joking. though he did wait until after the Big US to tell them) Eventually he got excited. and him being excited showed me that I had made the right decision in staying. DH is a great father, and loves DS so much.

    So that's it. And that is why I was so surprised when DH brought up that we should have another kid, I thought DS was it for us, I got the ten year IUD and planned on having my tubes tied at the end of that ten years. I never worked up hope for another child, to me having DS and getting my way in the beginning felt like more than I could ask for. I still feel like I am waiting for Karma to get back at me for what I almost did. and sorry for hijacking the thread.





  2. #12
    Community Host Lizbet22's Avatar
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    That is actually an awesome story!!!
    Just goes to show how strong the two of you are!!!!
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    For me I'll just say... Pregnant again love!!! Lol
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  3. #13
    Mega Poster nidia's Avatar
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    Wow, beautiful story and I am so happy for you


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  4. #14
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    Yes i aggree, awesome story!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by CaityA83 View Post
    For telling dh I'm just going to have DS carry the test in and hand it to him
    I LOVE this idea, think ill do this! Although i will let the older ds hold it as i think the youngest may take the cap off and put in mouth EUW!!!








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  5. #15
    Posting Addict Heatherbella's Avatar
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    Mary, I agree, great story. So it's not the fairy tale you see in movies, it's still a good story. I'm glad you kept DS and it sounds like everything worked out wonderfully.

    When I was a teenager I got birth control from Planned Parenthood here in Canada. I have nothing but great things to say about that organization. Wonderful people. Wonderful educators.

    I can understand why you'd be shocked and pleased that DH wants #2. So fun! Now I'm even more happy for you!!!!
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  6. #16
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    That is a great story! I'm so glad that things worked out wonderfully!!! Well to tell DH this time around.. since I was suppose to have surgery the next day, I just said, "well, we might not be having surgery after all." He was shocked and a long period of silence fell on the other end of the phone... he's excited now, just takes a bit for him to get use to the idea even though this isn't our first rodeo lol. For my in laws I wrote "BIG SISTER" on the back of Brinley's diaper and she wore it over to their house. My MIL about passed out when she read it and it sank in! lol I wish I had it on video it was priceless!
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  7. #17
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    Mary - I, too, was in your shoes.. Ended up a single mama from it though. Not every "have a baby" story has the dream plot or perfect ending. As a Christian myself, I can totally relate!! And see PP in the same light.. I'm glad everything worked out for you and DS and DH!! It took me almost 6 years of court battles and DFS assistance for him to loosen his abusive grip on DD but after cashing in my 401 to hire the BEST atty my city has to offer, it was finally over.

    Your story made me smile. So happy you and DH are ready for another LO!!
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  8. #18
    Posting Addict marymoonu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MJDttc View Post
    I was 19 and didn't really want a kid, and DH was of the midset that having a kid was a terrible idea, so we decided I would get an abortion. I am Christian, but I am also pro-choice I have my reasons. So I set up an appointment for the next Saturday. I went to Planned Parenthood, feeling ok about the decision, then they pulled me back and during the ultra-sound, they asked if I wanted to see, which I agreed to. That sealed it, the little blob had a heart beat! I couldn't abort, at that moment my entire world shifted. I got off the table and they took me to talk to the counselor, the first thing I said after introductions was "I can't do it, I don't need the services." I was fully prepared for her to talk me into it, BUT SHE DIDNT! She was supportive of my choice (which is contradictory to what I had heard of those types of places! and made me like PP as a whole) she asked me if I had a support system (which I do, my family) and asked if I needed help getting in contact with resources, she gave me a picture of the ultrasound, as I left the clinic I said a prayer for her, she is a wonderful person.
    Tears in my eyes after reading this! While I'm personally pro-choice, it's always a tear-jerker for me when someone picks life.


    As for how I'll spill the beans, DH already knows. He's always up in my business when I'm POAS, so no surprising him, haha. As for telling everyone else, I'd rather not tell anyone for quite a while, so I don't know. My last pregnancy was difficult... I had HEAVY bleeding from weeks 9-12, and I lived in constant fear of losing my little bean. The pregnancy before that was a m/c. So I'm jaded by my recent experiences, which is why I'm not rushing out to tell anyone. I wouldn't mind waiting until the gender scan and just announce, "We're having a baby and it's a ______." With my previous pregnancies, it took my belly forever to pop, so I could quite possibly hide it that long, especially with cooler weather and big sweaters on the way.

    Sean Thomas - 6/30/09 @ 7:17pm 8lb 8oz, 19", 40w5d
    Calvin Michael - 2/28/11 @ 7:39pm 6lb 8oz, 18", 37w5d
    Nolan Matthew - 5/1/13 @ 11:54pm 6lb 4oz, 19", 38w4d

    May 26, 2010 - 7w1d

  9. #19
    Super Poster callie2's Avatar
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    I told DH in his birthday card this weekend and let him see the test...he needed proof. As for telling everyone else? I don't know what I'll do or when...all I know is I'm not ready to tell anyone other than DH (and you ladies and the gals in my March 2011 birth group...hi Marymoonu!! )
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  10. #20
    Posting Addict marymoonu's Avatar
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    Hi Callie! It's good to see you here, woohoo!!


    Oh, and I finally decided how I MIGHT spill the beans...... I'll be almost exactly 12 weeks on Halloween, which I figure is a good time to tell everyone. So I might make one of those skeleton costumes with a baby skeleton in the belly and take a pic to post on fb!

    Something like this:

    Sean Thomas - 6/30/09 @ 7:17pm 8lb 8oz, 19", 40w5d
    Calvin Michael - 2/28/11 @ 7:39pm 6lb 8oz, 18", 37w5d
    Nolan Matthew - 5/1/13 @ 11:54pm 6lb 4oz, 19", 38w4d

    May 26, 2010 - 7w1d

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