I feel so guilty lately.. for not spending enough time with my son! He'll ask me to lay and cuddle with him while he watches a movie and I say ok but I get busy doing other things and then I realize it and it breaks my heart!! So my goal is to spend as much time as I can with him before Lucas arrives. Forget the clothes/dishes for one day and just be lazy with him.
Liliana is a little older so she would be effected by a little more impactful something.. I was thinking aboutjazzing up her birthday party this year - since it will probably be her last "friend-based" party (she'll be 10) - and letting her have a Lazer Tag party in the local caves. She went to one last year and it was pretty cool!
Other than that, I thought about a day out at the local water resort.. we have Cocoa Keys and Great Wolf Lodge.. both are inside but one you HAVE to stay at the hotel to get passes and the other you can buy just a day pass for 1/4 of the price of a hotel stay. So I thought she would enjoy a mommy and me day at the water park.
I walk along holding your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical relationship.Suddenly I feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that our time alone is limited.And I wonder, how could I love another child as I love you?
Then she is born, and I watch you.I watch as the pain you feel at having to share me as you have never shared me before.
I hear you telling me in your own way, "Please love only me" and I hear myself telling you in mine "I can't".Knowing in fact that I never can again.You cry, I cry with you.I almost see our baby as an intruder on the precious relationship we once shared. A relationship we can never have again.
But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and feeling almost guilty.I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her -- as though I am betraying you.But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity, then to protectiveness, finally to genuine affection.
More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine.The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast.But something is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just us two.There are new times-- only now we are three.I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch each other.
I watch how she adores you, as I have for so long.I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you, I've given something to you.I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you.I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally strong.And my question is finally answered to my amazement.Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you, only differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I know you'll never share my love.There's enough of that for the both of you -- you each have your own supply.
I love you both and I thank you both for blessing my life.
AHHH! I love that, Samantha! That's exactly how I feel. When I first got pregnant I asked my husband, how can I love someone else as much as I love our son? But I do.. even in the womb, I love this baby so much! I can't wait to experience loving someone else as much as I love my Noah. It's truly amazing. I know it'll be hard for Noah at first but I know he will be ok. I agree.. we are giving our children so much more when we give them a sibling.
Ummm... get their bedroom done? I did a party for them (together, their birthdays are two weeks apart). Since I have two, they're already used to sharing me.
But really, I am planning on painting their bedroom today and it's a little stressful. Just want to make sure I have everything covered and stuff, I've never painted a room all by myself before! And that means moving furniture around/out of the room and putting up a bunk bed later and moving in new furniture, etc etc. and THEN they get to sleep in the same room which will be an adjustment I know! So that's really on my mind right now.
Tori, are they excited about bunk beds? Because my son is already talking about a bunk bed for him and Lucas LOL
Oh and you're going to get a work out today! I hope it all works out just fine though.. I've never put together a bunk bed by myself let alone painted by myself!
Yeah, I've tried to play up the bunk bed thing as much as possible. They are excited. And DH will be doing the bunk bed part. It's huge and heavy so I couldn't do that myself!
Prepped the room, taking a break for lunch and painting in the afternoon! Here's to a successful job! I cleared out the room except for the dresser and train table (doesn't fit through the door without being tilted and is covered in legos). I just hope I can cover the floor enough that I don't make a mess...
GL I hope it's not a messy job! Sounds like you are getting it all done. Me, on the other hand.. I still haven't even bought the crib LOL! I am so undecided on a convertible mini crib or a regular crib. It'll be in our room for now and I really need to save some space. I just keep going back and forth.