So I went to CO Springs to visit my sister and her family with my parents. My mom, sister, her little girl, and my little boy and I all went out together in my moms 5 seat Santa Fe. My mom got all pissy because she "doesn't like my driving" and wanted my sister to drive. My sister said that if she drives who is going to sit in between the two kid car seats? My sister is 5'4" weighing in a grand total of 98 lbs. My mom said something like.. well i guess you're right. we're too fat to sit back there.... Yes... she called me fat!! I weighed 114 while 17 weeks (when this happened). I immediately started to bawl and said stuff that I don't remember but some thing like why would you say that? and stuff like that. My mom looked back at my sister (i'm pretty sure with the look of "oh she's so dramatic") and my sister flat out said... "no mom, that was rude!" She went quite for a quite a while... Then I calmed down again and we started talking about other things... we got to the store we were going to and I didn't park right by the entrance because I didn't see where it was. My sister was like, "oh you should have parked closer to the entrance" and my mom... (seriously!) said "oh it's ok. we can walk. It's not like we are skinny or anything." i'm pretty sure my sister gave her a look because she immediately said, "i didn't mean it that way" all snobby like.
So.... It was a rough time for me to say the least.
Not only am I not fat in general.. but 114 while 17 weeks pregnant and calling me fat?
What was even worse was that morning I said I was less than that my pre-preg weight. (only a few hrs prior)
UGH! What a poopy situation! Sometimes people need to think before they speak. Perhaps it was meant as a joke????
Is your mom larger or unhappy with her own weight??? My mom isn't super slender but isn't huge...and my mom has very low self esteem. What your mom sounds like something I could imagine my mom saying in a flippant way due to her own insecurities about herself. One time, years ago, I hadn't heard from my mom in a couple days and when I phoned my step dad asked if I had called my mom fat. Ummmm...what? I totally didn't remember it...but apparently my mom was all huffy about that! Something I didn't even remember happening and was likely her interpreting something in the wrong way. As I've been growing up I've noticed my mom's low self esteem more and more. It's SO much to manage (and very irritating!).
For the record, 117 lbs at 17 weeks is NOT overweight at all. Do not feel like it was a personal attack. I'm sure you look beautiful!
Have you thought about mentioning to your mom that it hurt you? Just to see what her take on the situation was? Sigh. Families can be such a pain sometimes. *hugs*
Yeah, it sounds to me like she was referring more to herself, rather than to you specifically. Like she took offense from your sister's comment, then went all crazy projecting it. Good times.
Sean Thomas - 6/30/09 @ 7:17pm 8lb 8oz, 19", 40w5d
Calvin Michael - 2/28/11 @ 7:39pm 6lb 8oz, 18", 37w5d
Nolan Matthew - 5/1/13 @ 11:54pm 6lb 4oz, 19", 38w4d
May 26, 2010 - 7w1d
Yeah my mom isn't super overweight currently but she's not skinny. She's fought the weight battle my entire life. which is why I'm so sensitive about it. I've grown up constantly worried about my weight. I am not used to even being as heavy as I am.... growing up never going over 100 until after having my DS. I know that she knew it hurt because I cried immediately and for a while. But I'm just aggravated at her still. Oh well. This too shall pass
Maddie, I'm sorry your feelings got hurt. I've grown up overweight, my entire life. Like, entire. I have some seriously bad memories of hurtful things being said to me - thankfully, where I am today - I'm good with who I am as a person. No one ever came right out and said, "You're fat", atleast not in my family. But there were hints thrown around constantly. My grandmother PAID me to not to drink soda for a month. My dad would constantly remind me that maybe I didn't need seconds. I'm still overweight - and let me tell you, I can't remember when I was 114!! You rock that skinny body lady! I'm sure you look amazing!