Sick of judgmental people *prego hormonal rant*
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Thread: Sick of judgmental people *prego hormonal rant*

  1. #1
    Posting Addict marymoonu's Avatar
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    Default Sick of judgmental people *prego hormonal rant*

    Okay. I've been induced twice. My babies were born without complication, perfectly healthy. So I'm sick to death of people judging me for being induced. It wasn't like I was asking for it. Quite the opposite, my doctor was recommending induction and I kept pushing to stay pregnant. And it's not like it's without cause. With my last, I had very low amniotic fluid. The doctor measures it on u/s by dividing the belly into 4 quadrants and measuring the fluid depth in each quadrant in centimeters. If the total cm is 5 of below, a diagnosis of oligohydraminos (low amniotic fluid) is given. My fluid was low for a few weeks and was being monitored by different doctors, both my OB and the lead OB at the hospital in L&D. It had been running about a 6 for weeks. On the day my DS was born, I had an appointment with my OB that morning and he personally did an u/s in his office to check the fluid levels. Three of the four quadrants had no fluid whatsoever (one empty quadrant can get you the same diagnosis). The fourth quadrant had 2cm. My baby had pretty much no fluid left around him. This can be indicative of other problems for both me AND the baby. So when my doctor said we should have a baby that day, I agreed. He was 37w5d. I wasn't ready. I had been fighting the doctor all along that I wasn't agreeing to early induction unless absolutely necessary. He knew my wishes quite well and we decided together that day that it was necessary. My baby was born healthy and thriving, at a great 6lb 8oz.

    That said... I hate, hate, hate feeling like I need to give that giant freaking explanation for myself for being induced. When I mentioned that I had been induced on his BB (I hadn't posted much of my story there while pregnant because he was actually due in March, born on the last day of February)... But then I get the bucket response "Well, my doctor isn't the inducing type." As if to presume that your doctor is more competent than mine because your doctor wouldn't induce you. If your doctor didn't induce you when 3/4 of your belly has no fluid and the other 1/4 has minimal, then more power to you. I'm not really willing to risk certain things and I shouldn't be made to feel like less of a mother or less of a woman for it. End rant.

    Sean Thomas - 6/30/09 @ 7:17pm 8lb 8oz, 19", 40w5d
    Calvin Michael - 2/28/11 @ 7:39pm 6lb 8oz, 18", 37w5d
    Nolan Matthew - 5/1/13 @ 11:54pm 6lb 4oz, 19", 38w4d

    May 26, 2010 - 7w1d

  2. #2
    Posting Addict Heatherbella's Avatar
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    UGH! How frustrating! I can understand people's tendency to want to avoid induction but based on what you've said, you were high risk due to the extremely low fluid and that is why you were induced. If I were you I would almost just say 'I was high risk and induction was required' and leave it at that. Honestly, it's no-one else's business. *hugs*

    I was high risk because DD was breech. I had a c-section 10 days before my due date because of it. I was also low fluid but I don't think it was as extreme as what you're talking about. Sometimes I feel sad that I had a c-section but at the time we did what was right for DD. I haven't really been met with many people outwardly judging me for it (thank goodness) but I know that if I did it would weight heavier on my mind.

    *hugs* You have to do what's right for you and your family. Let those people do what they want and try to ignore what they say. They don't have all the information nor were they in your shoes.
    Heather, 37

    Kennedy - b. 01.26.10 after 15 cycles of TTC
    Marshall - b. 06.17.13 after 3 cycles of TTC



  3. #3
    Mega Poster nidia's Avatar
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    I was about to say, you shouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone!! It's your pregnancy, your life.. and only you know WHY those things had to happen. People get on my nerves that think they are better bc they had an all natural birth, are breastfeeding, cloth diapering, etc. Everyone is different and nobody is a perfect mom. That being said not all cloth diapering mamas, breast feeling, etc. think that way.. just some do.

    I feel like that sometimes.. but just bc I had an emergency csection and didn't breastfeed my son for more than 3 months, etc.. doesn't make me less of a woman. Much love, girlie.


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    Prolific Poster blondiess4u's Avatar
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    Some people have such low confidence that they have to make other people feel bad so they can feel better. For some reason everyone thinks that their birthing is the right way and everyone else's is wrong. what I think is funny is that those people that give you crap for inducing are those the ones that complain their whole pregnancy that they are tired of being pregnant and want the baby out!

    I was induced last time too not by choice. I had low amniotic fluid as well. It's not safe and if a doctor thinks you should be induced you should listen. The other result is a possible stillbirth so it's an easy choice.
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    Posting Addict mom2robbie's Avatar
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    I get a bunch of people giving me grief as I was induced a month early. Now when people ask about Robbie's birth I say that I was induced a month early due to medical reasons. If they push it I will mention the gallstones and the round the clock morphine I needed. We monitored him closely and kept him in as long as possible. It got to the point that it was better for him to be born. Other then being tiny and having jaundice he was perfectly healthy. We had tons of meeting with neonatologists and my OB before anything happened. I had u/s every 2-3 days. We made an informed decision on my health and Robbie's health.
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    "The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind." Caroline Myss

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    Posting Addict Heatherbella's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nidia View Post
    People get on my nerves that think they are better bc they had an all natural birth, are breastfeeding, cloth diapering, etc. Everyone is different and nobody is a perfect mom. That being said not all cloth diapering mamas, breast feeling, etc. think that way.. just some do.
    WAIT a second! I breastfed and cloth diapered....but that's just mainly because I'm cheap. :P I can totally get how neither thing is a good fit for everyone though. Ok, phew, maybe I'm in the 'not every mama' category then! LOL
    2confused likes this.
    Heather, 37

    Kennedy - b. 01.26.10 after 15 cycles of TTC
    Marshall - b. 06.17.13 after 3 cycles of TTC



  7. #7
    Mega Poster nidia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heatherbella View Post
    WAIT a second! I breastfed and cloth diapered....but that's just mainly because I'm cheap. :P I can totally get how neither thing is a good fit for everyone though. Ok, phew, maybe I'm in the 'not every mama' category then! LOL

    Yeah, girl! Lol that's why I added that. I cloth diapered DS for a few months Breastfed him for a few as well.
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    I say healthy baby healthy momma = perfect birth. It's not like you chose to be induced just for your satisfaction or discomfort... people are just annoying lol. AND I do cloth diaper, breastfeed etc... lol it's not cheap just frugal oh and co sleep... I get ALL kinds of grief for that one haha
    mom2robbie likes this.
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  9. #9
    Posting Addict Heatherbella's Avatar
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    Hey, you get grief when you DON'T co-sleep too! Believe me.

    oh isn't it joyous to be a mom? It's not bad enough that you second guess yourself...you also have everyone else's glaring eyes on you too!
    mom2robbie and eliann like this.
    Heather, 37

    Kennedy - b. 01.26.10 after 15 cycles of TTC
    Marshall - b. 06.17.13 after 3 cycles of TTC



  10. #10
    Mega Poster nidia's Avatar
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    We co-slept and let me tell you.. even though it makes ME feel better.. my DH wasn't in love with it.. and we won't be doing this time. I think it's easier if you breastfeed to cosleep and I know I'll be doing it this first couple months but I'll eventually incorporate formula


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