Starting to freak out alittle...

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blondiess4u's picture
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Starting to freak out alittle...

about having a 3rd baby!!! Expecially since my other 2 are pretty young. I was fine about it all until it started to hit me this week that this baby is coming soon and I will have to balance my time with all of them including time with DH. I already have a hard time giving DS1 as much attention as he deserves because DS2 is still a baby and needs alot.
I am sure it will all work out in the end but I just feel like all my kids need one on one attention and don't think like I am going to be able to do that.

Anyone feeling the same?

nidia's picture
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I was just talking to DH about this last night! Told him how much our lives were about to change! It won't just be us 3 anymore.. it's going to be us 4. Wow! Crazy to think about.. but at the same time I am excited. I know that I will have to wake up earlier than usual too when I return back to work, things are just going to change but I know we will figure out a routine. I told DH that I hope Noah feels included and that he doesn't feel like we don't love him, etc. I know he may be a little jealous and it hurts me to think about.. my poor baby.. but I know he will also love having a brother. He already shares his food with me by saying "This is for Lucas!" It's so sweet.. and so life changing.. it blows my mind. But I can't wait!

So I totally understand. It changes so much from being a married couple and only being two.. to three.. and so on.

Heatherbella's picture
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I'm scared. LOL. As baby grows so does my excitement...but I'm still scared. The weirdest part for me is I'm going from zero kids all day to TWO! Right now DD is in daycare full time...but when I'm off on Maternity leave for a year, she will be home. We want to keep her in daycare at least 1 day a week though as it holds her spot and it's so good for her. I think it's $140 a month for 1 day a week (4 total). That's not bad. Hopefully we can swing it financially!

My mom only works casual (on call) so she's going to no accept much work in June so that she can come help. She has a bad back so can't do a lot of things but even just playing with DD and listening to her will be useful.

nidia's picture
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Oh wow.. that's a lot for 4 days a month to me.. but it must be a nice daycare Blum 3

My mother just quit her job.. and she is going to keep Lucas once I return to work. I'm so thankful for it. But I'm jealous of you getting a year off!

ILoveMyMiniMe's picture
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I've been thinking a little too hard about this myself.. I've never known anyone in my life to do the kid thing with so it's pretty nerve wracking to me.. With DD, it was all me. How I raised her.. where we went.. who handled what, when, how.. blah blah blah.. Now I have someone to think about and take their feelings / opinions into consideration when it comes to dsecisions.

I'm worried about money for day care.. we're "OK" now.. but child care is $1,000 a month. It's going to make it VERY tight for a while.. we're still getting some CCs paid off but have not made as much headway as I have wanted to.

So.. you're not alone in the worry department, mama.. :comfort:

nidia's picture
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"ILoveMyMiniMe" wrote:

I'm worried about money for day care.. we're "OK" now.. but child care is $1,000 a month. It's going to make it VERY tight for a while.. we're still getting some CCs paid off but have not made as much headway as I have wanted to.

Yikes! I can't believe how much daycare costs nowadays! When Noah was little my DH was going to school and working part time.. he did a lot of it online so he stayed home with DS and once he had to go in for some courses my aunt kept DS but she didn't charge me much at all. After that we moved and my sis in law kept DS and didn't charge us anything (She was fresh out of HS and wasn't sure what she wanted to do yet) and she was also next door to us. So I feel like we have been extremely blessed with that!

Heatherbella's picture
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Daycare here isn't too bad compared to the big cities. We chose a daycare center that is a little more pricey than a home daycare...but we really liked the structure and the level of care. When DD was in the infant/toddler center (until she was 2.5 years old) she cost $850 / month full time no food included. At 2.5 years she moved to the 3-5 Center and cost $675 / month including 1 snack. She turns 3 on Saturday and then it goes down to $600 a month! I can't wait! $75 is $75! LOL. $600 for 20 days a month is only $30 a day. Our minimum wage here is $10.25 / hour so the daycare cost isn't THAT much I don't think. Don't worry, I make more than $10.25 / hour. Blum 3

nidia's picture
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That's true.. our minimum wage sucks and I don't see how people can live working and making minimum wage!! Crazy. I'd say that here in South GA you get off cheap.. bc they will charge about $90.00-110.00/week. So I guess that's why it seems pricey. But if I were in Dallas it would be much, much higher.

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Ya, I think the minimum wage plays into it a lot. We could have had very cheap daycare had we gone with my MIL watching our DD but the quality of care just isn't there. You get what you pay for and while my MIL could keep DD alive, that's not the sort of environment I want her in. Blum 3

blondiess4u's picture
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Oh my.... the daycare cost!! It's ridiculas! We pay $160 a week for DS1. Since we are having our babysitter help us out for a few months when baby arrives, we are taking DS1 out of daycare for the summer and she will take care of the two boys, but she will still cost alot, but alittle cheaper then having both boys in daycare. We don't have very much family around so we have to pay for help.
You're so lucky Nidia to have your mom watch Lucas when you go back to work

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I think once you have two it becomes almost cheaper to have someone come to your home. My friend scored an awesome deal with a home daycare....they take her 3 and 1 year old for $1,000/month (so $500 each)! That's a score!

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We have Jack at a Kindercare right now and it is 183/week. An infant would be about 260/week. That is almost my entire monthly paycheck. I haven't found a home daycare around here that I trust and we have no family here at all. :/ We are planning on my staying home instead at least for a year. I don't mind paying for good daycare, but you have to be able to afford it. It is not worth me working for a little over 2000 a month and most of that going to daycare. Teaching is way too time involved and stressful for taking home a few hundred dollars a month and not getting to see my babies grow up.

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OH me too me too!!! Especially since the 4 of us all had an awful cold this week, it's was awful.. All I could think about was how I would handle all of it with a baby. Yikes.. I guess things will just fall into place like they did when #2 came along..lol

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I'm nervous about a third too. I've gotten into a good rhythm with my two. Sometimes I seriously think "What did I do?!" but only for a second then this little boy kicks and I'm glad he's coming Smile it's going to be nuts though!

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So I called about getting baby boy into the Early Education Center at DD's school - and they're booked out until November.

Great. :roll:

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"ILoveMyMiniMe" wrote:

So I called about getting baby boy into the Early Education Center at DD's school - and they're booked out until November.

Great. :roll:

Can you go on a waiting list? Who knows when someone will move away!

Around here it's really hard to get infant/toddler spots. DD was on a waiting list for a while. Ugh. Because we get a year off I, thankfully, don't need to worry about that right now.

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My solution was to start my own home daycare, so instead of paying someone else, people pay me. Smile I don't make what I used to, but between not having to commute or pay for daycare and LOVING my job, it's all worth it.

nidia's picture
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That's great, Lauren. I don't know that I could handle more kids than my own daily. Lol. Kudos to you!

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I am completely FREAKED OUT by #4!!!! My first 2 are 21 months apart but was pretty easy really... my 3rd... well she's a bit of a pistol! lol Plus we started homeschooling the oldest who will be going in 2nd grade and the other in kgarten when baby comes... Im a mess and dh is financially freaking out.. this baby was a lil surprise to us but I trust God has a plan Wink As for working, I have just gone back as a nurse and do weekend nightshift only a few weekends/month. With childcare cost it's just not worth me working. I did the at home daycare thing for 6 yrs and was just over it! lol I can make more working 2 weekends/ month than working 12 -14 hour days 5 days/week and the wear and tear on my house and kids toys...

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You'll do great mama